Too often, words come out of our mouths that we vowed we would never say. And, to make matters worse, our tone sounds harsh or critical. Believe it or not, as bosses we often sound like our parents did when we were growing up. Imagine sounding like your critical parents when you’re speaking to your employees. Yikes!
Stop sounding like a critical parent when communicating with your adult employees.
Why Is This Important?
Statistically, employees leave their employers because of their boss! But, they will often tell their employer they’re leaving because of lack of pay, benefits, immediate opportunities and other perks. Usually, it is because of their boss’s poor communication skills: lack of respect, tone of voice, words used, promises not kept and promotions that never happened. Right or wrong, they blame the boss!
9 Ways to Communicate as a Great Boss
One. It’s an Inside Job. You are responsible for setting aside your inner judgments and beliefs regarding how people should think, act, talk, dress … ad nauseam. Remember, simply using the right words or jargon will not prevent others from “hearing” what you really believe or think about them (over 80 percent of communication is non-verbal!).
Two. Influence. Learn to influence others instead of telling them what to do, how to do it and when to do it in a commanding tone. Engage them by sharing the bigger picture, and allow them to handle the details without being micromanaged.
Three. Listen! Develop a positive attitude and authentic belief that others have great solutions! (Really, they do!) Listen and learn from others’ ideas, incorporate them and give each person credit.
Four. Treat People Right. Treat people with respect by developing “boss smarts.” Hang around other managers who have a great track record of interacting well with their employees. Take away insights that will work for you and help you respect others. (Hint: Understand you will never be just like them!)
Five. Understand Your People. Use qualified assessment tools to understand why employees either work well together or are not an effective team. These objective products provide incredibly accurate insights and turn you into a perceptive coach your employees will value. When you understand your people, they enjoy coming to work each day!
Six. Understand Your Style. Use qualified assessment and 360-degree feedback tools to help understand your style now that you are a boss. Review the feedback with your coach, mentor and employees to uncover actual strengths and weaknesses, and develop methods to help you become a more effective boss. (Most important: Never hold their comments against them.)
Seven. Tone and Word Choice. The words and tone of voice you use tell a much deeper story than you may realize. Work with an experienced executive coach or licensed therapist to role-play your choice of words in upcoming situations. Learn how to speak with others when describing challenges and opportunities. As you become a more confident communicator, your tone of voice will naturally change.
Eight. Journal for Clarity. This is a great way to see, in black and white, your thoughts about people and/or situations. It gives you a chance to work through complex issues in a more objective and helpful manner. Then, shred. NEVER send a letter spewing your upsets, no matter how justified you believe you are.
Nine. Confidence. Often, your innermost and deepest fear is that you are a fraud and everyone is going to find out. To awaken your internal communication talent, get the book It’s Time to Brag! Business Edition, and do the work in order to communicate with confidence. Remember, there are no shortcuts!
Being a great boss requires improving your communication to elicit the best from your employees, others and yourself.
©Jeannette Seibly, 2017
Are you experiencing challenges that are causing sleepless nights? Is your team avoiding eye contact with you? Are you avoiding anyone on your team? To turn this around quickly … now is the time to talk. Contact Jeannette for a free confidential conversation at http://SeibCo.com/contact/.
Jeannette Seibly has been a business advisor and executive coach for over 24 years; along the way she’s guided the creation of three millionaires. She is laser sharp at identifying the leverage points that will take a business and its team to the next level of performance and success. Check out her website, http://SeibCo.com, or contact Jeannette for a free, confidential conversation at http://SeibCo.com/contact.