Everyone experiences tough times. It’s a reality that you cannot avoid.

But tough times don’t have to last for a long time if you take real actions to resolve the situation, relationships, or failure.

The key is to learn from these tough times. Then, move on. Remember, making hasty, poorly thought-out decisions during these times will cause the problem(s) to hang around longer!

Jere was devastated that another team member quit – but at least this one had let him know before he left instead of ghosting him as the others had done. When his boss demanded Jere take action instead of wallowing in his “tough time,” he talked with his executive coach.

The coach walked him through the steps required. This time, Jere took notes instead of citing money and time as excuses for his poor hiring practices. Changing old habits and looking at leadership blind spots helped Jere see why his tough times kept hanging around! Jere took real action by being coachable and listening to his executive coach! He spent several hours setting up his job fit selection system and had others (e.g., HR and legal) sign off on it. The good news? With this new system, he improved his selection process and worked with his executive coach to improve his management and coaching style. His team retention increased, and so did his customers’ satisfaction.

The three lessons he learned?

• Stop attempting to do everything “your own way” … it only creates tough times.
• Time and money are the most common (aka lazy) excuses that overlook the valid reason for bad habits hanging around!
• Working with an executive coach will teach you how to develop resilience, resourcefulness, and flexibility in your management style.

How to Develop Resilience, Resourcefulness, and Flexibility

Resilience. The experience of working through the tough times in a way that creates intended results and resilience. The best way is to work with an executive coach who has been through tough times and helped others successfully navigate them. Remember, attempting to take shortcuts or believing you have it all handled when you experience a minor victory only keeps the tough times hanging around and makes the lesson(s) more expensive.

Resourcefulness. Take initiative because sitting and waiting for the answers never works. Resourcefulness requires focused action to resolve the issue, challenge, or problem.

Example: Trina kept waiting for Ted, her team member, to improve. Even though she continued to receive customer complaints, she did nothing. Her biggest fear was having a straight conversation with Ted and causing him to quit. Trina didn’t feel other team members were capable of doing his job. (A false assumption.) When her boss demanded she work with her executive coach, she finally asked for real help. They created a plan. First, Trina looked at the objective data for all her team members and found that several had the skills required. Then, Trina talked with Ted. Surprisingly, he told her he planned to leave but didn’t know what to say to her. They worked out a focused action plan and delegated different parts of Ted’s job to other team members who looked forward to their new job responsibilities.

Flexibility. We all believe we know how people and situations should work. But know-it-alls usually hurt themselves and keep the tough times around longer than others. Flexibility requires listening and expanding your perspective for you and your team to cross the finish line and win.

Example: Joseph believed he was right that no one else could do his job as well as he did. The problem was that Joseph was in an auto accident, and the team had to pitch in to honor customer commitments or lose a lot of money during this tough time. During the process, Joseph learned flexibility and how to allow others to do the work without micromanaging them. The good news? Joseph and his team realized that working together made the results even better, with happier customers!

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a champion for success. As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Jeannette’s depth of experience and wisdom can transform those bosses from hated to respected! Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about being Resilient, Resourceful, and Flexible during tough times: All bosses and leaders experience tough times, often more than once, twice, or thrice! During these times, lessons are available for management and leadership growth … if you are open to them! If you’re not, your tough times will hang around longer than you want. Have questions about what you need to do? Contact me!

Are you ready to build your confidence and success as a boss? The coach is in! Every boss and leader has their blind spots! They get in the way of being a results-producer! When tough times occur, and they will, asking for the right help is important! I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses to hire, coach, and manage their teams. Along the way, they achieve unprecedented results. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

For busy business professionals, stress is unavoidable, especially during the holidays. Stressors impact your results, interactions with people, and your ability to get everything done!

To disrupt holiday stress and manage it, clarify, prioritize, and take focused action steps to move forward. It sounds simple, but it’s not always easy to do.

Get Into Action to Reduce Stress!

Pick one now and do it! It doesn’t matter which one. Just do it!

Prioritize. Not everything is a priority. Make a list of everything that you believe needs to be done. Circle the top ten. Now, cut the list down to the top three. Rank your priorities 1, 2, and 3. Do number 1 now. When it’s done, move on to number 2. Then, number 3. Don’t forget to celebrate the completion of each task. Note: Be honest with yourself! If you won’t do something on the list, just cross it off!

Let Go. Not everything needs to be done immediately. If you need to file or shred papers, get an oil change for your vehicle, or replace a light bulb, schedule it on your calendar for later in the week. Then, honor that scheduled time.

Delegate. Stop being a lone ranger. Yes, your team members will not do things exactly the same way you would. Consider that they might do a better job … if you let them.

Do It for 20 minutes. Too often, we have dreaded reports or other activities we must do. Yawn. Instead, set a timer and do it for 20 minutes. Then, decide whether to spend another 20 minutes or schedule it for later.

Excuses Be Gone. Too often, we create excuses about why we haven’t completed something. Stop! The mental energy would be better spent developing and taking action on the mantra, “I can do this and do it now.”

Stop Multitasking. Commit to getting one thing done at a time. There is satisfaction in fully completing something. While it may seem like multitasking allows you to get more things done, it rarely works that way. For example, attempting to write a report and listen to an employee simultaneously only creates more stress for both of you. You will miss addressing essential points in the report, and your employee will feel unheard and unimportant.

Write It Out. Studies have shown that it can be cathartic when people write down their fears, upsets, and frustrations. Writing helps get negative thoughts out of your head and provides insights. The key is to keep things private and not share your written journal with others. Do not send your upsets in an email or text to your boss, client, employee, or co-worker (or post them on social media). They are private.

Walk It Out. Take 10 minutes, three times daily, to walk around, go up and down the stairs, or simply move! Remember to breathe!

Talk It Out. Turn your internal monologues into dialogues. Get them out of your head. Share your concerns with someone who can help you. It may be an excellent time to find an executive coach who can help you stay focused and improve your effectiveness while decreasing stress.

Meditate. Take time to empty your mind and be silent for several minutes. It can be refreshing. Sit comfortably. Focus on breathing in and out. When thoughts appear—and they will—say, “Noise.” Don’t make these thoughts good or bad. Meditating may be the most effective way to reduce tension and anxiety, yet the most difficult for highly stressed people.

Brag. When you learn how to brag, it is a huge confidence booster. Complete your Brag! statements. Keep these up to date and review them anytime stress doesn’t go away or you need a confidence boost. Remember, 2024 is right around the corner. Be ready to win a new job, promotion, opportunity, pay raise, and/or sale … or any goal that fulfills you.

©Jeannette Seibly 2018–2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a champion for success. As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Jeannette’s depth of experience and wisdom can transform those bosses from hated to respected! Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about de-stressing during this time of the year: Stress is unavoidable, especially during the holidays … many of you have expectations for yourself and others, year-end challenges, and unfilled goals. Before you do anything else … breathe. Take time this year to de-stress and enjoy the holiday season. It will support you as we round the corner into 2024! Contact me if you need a sounding board. Happy Holidays!

Are you ready to build your confidence and success as a boss? The coach is in! Every boss and leader has their blind spots! They get in the way of being a results-producer! When tough times occur, and they will, asking for the right help is important! I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses to hire, coach, and manage their teams. Along the way, they achieve unprecedented results. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

The short answer: In today’s world, many unknown factors occur when you create new systems, design new products and services, and handle people challenges to meet customer demands.

Change (real and perceived) causes anxiety for you, team members, boards, and customers. When you (or they) are uncomfortable or confronted, it feels like a mosquito constantly buzzing. Then, you (or they) may do mischievous things to make the annoyance stop (make bad decisions, focus on personal impacts, hideout).

On October 7^th, I celebrated having been a leadership, executive, and people coach for over 31 years!

I’ve worked with:

• Tough leaders that continually get themselves in trouble.
• Other leaders that have the capabilities but not the drive and willingness to address the “tough issues” or have the “tough conversations.”
• Successful leaders that are the guiding light for others and understand they still need an objective sounding board when making those “tough decisions.”

My philosophy: Good leaders with leadership coaches produce their intended results while guiding their team members to grow.

Having a leadership coach will:

• Sharpen your skills
• Help you be coachable
• Teach you to accept feedback from customers, bosses, teams, and others
• Provide a committed listener to reduce anxiety, stress, and frustrations
• Improve decisions, relationships, results, and bottom lines
• Show you how to develop team members to excel and achieve unprecedented results

6 Traits Required to Grow Your Leadership

Influence Others. Being an influencer depends on your ability to work with and through others! Making good decisions and providing clarity during the murky times is the leader’s opportunity to influence while growing the team. Your leadership coach guides you in your critical thinking, working relationships, and basic knowledge.

For example, if you have a team conflict, it’s essential to address it immediately because it never gets better. (Or, I would have already!) As an influencer and leader, develop a strategy with your coach. Start the process using a qualified job-fit assessment to help the team see why they are pointing fingers at each other and how to achieve the intended results. (Objective data)

Listen While Building a Workable Plan. Listening is critical for everyone, especially a successful leader. It’s amazing what you’ll hear and the ideas that pop up as a result of true listening. Remember, not every idea has a positive return on investment. Work with your coach to ensure everyone is encouraged to contribute solutions and that the plan meets budgets, timelines, and customer needs.

Make Good Decisions. Too often, leaders want to be liked. As a result, they fail to make good decisions or any decisions. They lose the respect of others, including their board, top talent, and customers. A leadership coach helps you formulate good business questions to ask before having the required conversations to make better decisions.

Work with Difficult People. There will always be nay-sayers, those jealous and upset that you have what they want (e.g., job, title, results, money). It’s impossible to avoid these types of co-workers and employees. But don’t ignore the gossip they create, and include them in discussions by asking for their advice. (Use mindful resilience techniques when triggered by their comments or actions.) While this minimizes the negativity, it won’t stop them from their critical critique of you. (It’s not personal – if it wasn’t about you, they would criticize someone or something else … and often do.)

Clarify Leadership Blind Spots. Work with your leadership coach to discover your leadership blind spots. Remember, you can build on strengths. Focusing on weaknesses only keeps them around.

Avoid Excuses! Time and money are the #1 excuses and rarely the real issues. Look beneath these excuses to identify the fears you and others attempt to cover up. Are the fears something that can be addressed? In most cases, yes. Working with your coach keeps the conversation moving forward, ensures it stays on point and provides realistic goals/results.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a champion for success. As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Jeannette’s depth of experience and wisdom comes from 31 years of transforming bosses from hated to respected! Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about working with a leadership coach: Successful leaders have coaches! Let me repeat this! Successful leaders have coaches! (think Michael Jordan, Tom Brady) A coach helps improve your results, people management, and ability to navigate complicated relationships and situations. Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation about how to hire the right leadership coach for you!

The coach is in! Are you ready to build your confidence and success as a boss? As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Or are you one of those bosses? With my depth of experience and wisdom, I transform bosses from hated to respected! Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Listening and hearing are critical skills for every boss today. But they are not the same skill!

• Listening is paying attention to a message to hear, understand, and physically or verbally respond to it.
• Hearing is the process, function, or power of perceiving sound. (HandyHandouts.com)

When you listen to what your teams and employees say, you’ll gain respect, solutions, honesty, and better results. If you are hearing the words (like many bosses do), it’s not good enough. You will lose customers, top talent, and career opportunities. (The list is endless!)

Listening to Be a Great Boss

Be Present! Focus and stop multi-tasking. While listening, set aside electronics, negative feelings, replaying old conversations, and other distractions (e.g., people-watching). When listening or speaking, stay focused on the current discussion! You’ll be amazed by what you can learn, even if you believe you already know it all!

Breathe to Stop Triggers! When you notice you are triggered or offended, breathe in for 5 counts. Pause. Exhale for 5 counts. (Or any number that works for you.) Repeat this breathing pattern 3 times. Breathing reduces the fight, flight, or freeze stress response triggered in your brain. Note: If you need to do this often, discuss it with your executive coach and/or a therapist.

Let Them Finish! They’ve been rehearsing what they want to say for a while. If you cut them off because you’re impatient or think you know what they will say, they will start all over again … at the beginning! Since some people are poor communicators, they may ramble, lack clarity of what they want to say, or fear saying what they really want to say — help by inviting them to share the main point of what they want to say. Pay very close attention to your tone of voice – remember, you’re asking them, not ordering them.

Check Back! Being on the same page in a conversation is crucial to being considered a great boss and listener! When someone is finished sharing their thoughts or ideas, check back to be sure you heard them. Never assume you did! The best practice is to use the same words they used. For example, if they say “generous,” use the same word, not something else. Then ASK THEM, is this correct? Note: Refrain from using slang or inappropriate words since the conversation will be repeated with others!

Build on Their Ideas! Working together, take their ideas and build on them. This not only improves your results; it keeps others in the conversation. Be open to listening to their additional ideas, too.

Expand Your Perspective. Listen and honor differences! If you have difficulty listening to others’ points of view, you will limit your ability to be a great boss. Participate in training programs and workshops, and hire an executive coach to help expand your thinking. I have found that while qualified assessments significantly improve job fit, they also provide an ability to listen beyond your perception of what others can accomplish on the team!

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a champion for success. As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Jeannette’s depth of experience and wisdom can transform those bosses from hated to respected! Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about listening to be a great boss: I’ve been saying this for years. Bosses need to listen beyond just hearing the words. It improves team members’ willingness and abilities to communicate their ideas, thoughts, and solutions! It starts with you and how you listen! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation about being a great boss who listens! 

The coach is in! Are you ready to build your confidence and success as a boss? As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Or are you one of those bosses? With my depth of experience and wisdom, I transform bosses from hated to respected! Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Crossing the finish line and achieving the goal requires believing AND doing the work required!

The challenge? We give up too soon … and spend more time creating excuses and talking with others who support our reasons than looking for guidance to cross the finish line!

We have heard of the fable about the tortoise’s and the hare’s efforts to cross the finish line. Today, most people believe they must be the hare to cross the finish line — be faster, smarter, and make more money. But it’s the tortoise that crosses the finish line to win! The hare burned out, stressed out, and gave up too soon due to poor job fit, poor work practices, and an overconfident ego.

Example: Jeremy got his degree in engineering due to his parents’ expectations and financial support. But his genuine desire was to start a nonprofit to support refugees. After getting his engineering degree, he worked for an engineering company. He took advantage of the company’s education and volunteer programs to learn how to establish and run a successful nonprofit. Jeremy honored his commitment by not giving up, crossed his finish line, and now runs a nonprofit. Currently, he’s looking for the next finish line (a new goal)!

What Do You Need to Do to Cross the Finish Line?

Know Your True Self. Take time to get honest about what you’d really really really like to accomplish. Use a qualified job fit assessment to clarify your strengths, and work with an executive coach to develop them. (Just because you’re a math whiz doesn’t mean you should be an accountant or a financial planner!) Remember, no one is born a leader, design engineer, or financial trader … it all requires doing the work!

Set a Timeline. When do you wish to achieve your goal? Be realistic and work with a career coach. In your current job, use the company’s education plan to get the training and certificates required to support your goal, or seek out other options.

Make a Financial Plan that Works. It’s the foundation for reaching your goal. Also, create a business or career plan. Know what you need financially to cross the finish line and achieve your goal. Be realistic about the numbers and expenses, and start saving and working on your plan today!

Understand Expectations. Regardless of your finish line (new job, create a business, travel, etc.), ask and learn about the required hours and experience and other expectations. Example: A new air controller was excited about his new job. But when the work schedule for the upcoming month was passed around, he crossed out the times he was listed to work since he didn’t want to work those hours. His new career was short-lived because of his unrealistic expectations.

Ask for Real Help! Don’t be embarrassed to ask for help! Many people have not been where you want to go, and their counsel isn’t based on reality. Look for people who have achieved or helped others achieve your goal. Crossing any finish line requires an industry mentor, executive coach, and other supporters! Beware when someone insists you do it their way. Say, “Thank you,” and move on.

Create Daily Practices. It takes small steps consistently taken over and over, like the tortoise, to cross the finish line and achieve your goal! When you become good at your work, it’s not time to stop! Be a student, be curious, and keep doing the basic work, even when bored! Remember, good basic practices are required to develop mastery to win. (Like building physical strength, it takes many repetitions over and over.)

Develop Communication and People Skills. Regardless of what you wish to accomplish, you need good written and verbal skills (beyond texts and emails) and good interpersonal skills (even though you may not like talking with others). Take workshops, attend a social event weekly, and learn the art of talking with anyone anywhere at any time. If you wish to travel, include a foreign language.

Remember, the tortoise kept going regardless of the circumstances– their commitment to cross the finish line never wavered. It may seem impossible at times for you, but there is no greater satisfaction than honoring your commitment to cross the finish line and achieve your goal!

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a champion for success. As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Jeannette’s depth of experience and wisdom can transform those bosses from hated to respected! Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about crossing the finish line and achieving your goal: Remember the fable about the tortoise and the hare? The tortoise kept going regardless of the circumstances that got in the way and crossed the finish line. What is getting in your way of crossing your finish line and achieving your goal? Have questions about what you need to do? Contact me!

The coach is in! Are you ready to build your confidence and success as a boss? A great boss has goals and a commitment to achieve them. When circumstances and life get in the way, asking for help is important! I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses to hire, coach, and manage their teams. Along the way, they achieve unprecedented results. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Congrats! You’ve received an offer for a new career opportunity. The problem? You’re not ready! Here’s the dilemma. Taking it can cause potential failure. And not taking it could limit future opportunities. It’s a difficult decision to make.

Samantha accepted a position as a manager of her department. She had the administrative skills required but lacked the experience of leading a team, having always been a team member. Instead of asking for help and guidance, Samantha faced potential failure when she complained about the same things to her boss as when she was a team member! Samantha failed to realize it was now her responsibility to provide the solutions, not complain about them!

Accepting new opportunities before you’re ready can derail your future. Too often, you’re in a big hurry to get a new job title, make more money, or enjoy the prestige of moving up in the company. But suffering through the struggles of being unprepared is not worth sacrificing your peace of mind and derailing future career opportunities.

Tips to Prepare for Future Opportunities

Job Fit. According to Gallup, over 80 percent of people don’t like their jobs. They blame their boss, the company, and their co-workers. The truth? They don’t fit their job responsibilities! To avoid this, use a valid job-fit assessment. The reports provide objective awareness of the strengths required for your new position before you say “yes.” It also provides insights into your challenge areas. For example, as an account manager, you may have been fearless in talking with others (strength). But as a sales manager, this same strength can get in your way of listening to the sales team (weakness).

Get Real. New opportunities require moving forward outside your comfort zone. They also will require new levels of communication, project management, and emotional intelligence, which are hindered by leadership blind spots. Because many of these job requirements are unwritten, shadow the incumbent in the job. Ask questions. Don’t assume you won’t have similar challenges. (You will.) Before you say “yes,” ask them, “What did you do to overcome these issues?”

Hire an External Coach and Seek Out an Internal Mentor. Be coachable! Ask for help and seek guidance immediately before you get mired in sticky situations or political relationships that sabotage your current and future career opportunities.

Do the Real Work. While mantras can keep you focused, they don’t replace doing the actual work. For example, if you ignore team conflict and respond with mantras (e.g., “Patience is a virtue.”), you’ll be sidelined or fired. The resolution requires having tough conversations, making difficult decisions (unpopular), and holding others accountable (your team may not like you). Work with your executive coach now to avoid these types of career derailments.

Emotional Intelligence. Mindful awareness and resilience are required in many positions today, especially as a boss and leader. There will be mistakes made and failures, too. Your ability to handle and learn from them greatly affects your career opportunities.

Leadership Savvy. Microaggressions, playing favorites, and not listening to others are the downfall for many in new positions. Instead, set a positive example. It starts with you and the team being trained. These training workshops should include conflict resolution, brainstorming, diversity, project management, critical thinking, and execution of projects. Now, develop the habit of using these skills.

Project Management. A critical part of project management is the ability to conduct effective meetings, both onsite and remote. However, many overlook the people and logistical sides of getting everyone on the same page. Both are critical to any project or program’s design, process, and execution.

• People side: Develop your team members, focus on their strengths, and include everyone when brainstorming. Allow everyone to develop their talents.
• Logistical side: Develop and incorporate budget, technology, operations, sales, and marketing into every project or program.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022-2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a champion for success. As a leader, do you have bosses that are difficult for teams to work with? Jeannette’s depth of experience and wisdom can transform those bosses from hated to respected! Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about taking and accepting opportunities before you’re ready: Taking a new job before you’re ready is a surefire way to derail your career. Prepare now and enjoy your new opportunities! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation about being career-ready! 

The coach is in! Are you ready to build your confidence and success as a boss? A great boss is not easily annoyed and effectively addresses team and project issues. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses to hire, coach, and manage their teams. Along the way, they achieve unprecedented results. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.