Business

A Rewarding Life Requires Showing Up for Yourself

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We all believe a rewarding life requires success … something external to ourselves … the accolades, material possessions (e.g., designer clothes, fancy vehicle), promotions, eating at the best restaurants … to name a few.

These are the moments when we override our own well‑being to meet external expectations.

But what if showing up for yourself truly means honoring your needs, aligning with your values, supporting your health, not skipping healthful eating habits, and being present and responsible when making your daily choices?

For many leaders, showing up for yourself is the hardest part, and often creates feelings of guilt, resistance, or fear when they start choosing themselves. Because in our society, when people do things for themselves, they are often considered selfish.

Consider, it’s the small, daily, consistent choices that build self-trust and self-resilience for building a rewarding life … because how you show up for yourself becomes part of the legacy you leave.

10 Habits That Matter

  1. What are my needs? Identify and prioritize them by reflecting on what your body says is important. Pause long enough to ask and listen to, “What do I need right now?” Listen to your intuition. Then, gently investigate what feels “off” or unmet in your life — physically, emotionally, or mentally. Then, make it a habit to schedule time to meet those needs, whether it’s rest, exercise, or a hobby.
  2. Set Boundaries and Say No, or Say Yes. If you are constantly saying “no,” … then, take a breath before saying “yes.” And vice-versa. Remember, doing things you don’t want to do or that don’t match your values will drain your energy. Failing to say yes to doing what you really want to do and allowing your fears and self-doubts to get in the way will drain your energy.
  3. Keep It Simple and Smart. Participate in life willingly. Journal daily, walk several times weekly, and drink plenty of water. Get together frequently with friends, neighbors, and family members who you enjoy. These simple activities create good health and well-being.
  4. Be Flexible. As you move through life changes, your point of view, things you enjoy, even foods you used to like or hate will change. Embrace these changes. Explore what else you may have ignored because of old outdated beliefs.
  5. Invest in Personal Growth. This is often overlooked by the excuse, “I cannot afford it. My employer won’t pay for it.” However, reading, learning new skills, being curious, and becoming resourceful will build confidence and open new opportunities. (And, most of these are free.) Use AI as a tool to inquire into what else may be intriguing. Now schedule the class, read the book, and enjoy doing the work. Action builds momentum by taking small steps forward.
  6. Practice Self-Compassion. We are almost always harder on ourselves than on others. Learn the art of grace and forgiveness. Carrying around guilt or regrets do not support you or your future. Talk with a therapist to address internal roadblocks. Also, hire the right coach to move you forward to achieve a long-awaited goal.
  7. Surround Yourself with Support. Choose people and environments that uplift you and support your goals in life. Select people to support your health and welling being, work with a mentor (in addition to your coach) to stay up-to-date with work changes. Join a work, community, or volunteer team that elevates your creativity. These choices and actions will naturally remove the naysayers, skeptics, and others that impede you moving forward.
  8. Protect Your Self-Care. Rest instead of pushing. Eat nourishing foods that you enjoy. Remember, your energy is important. And so is your environment since it feeds your energy. Schedule small increments of time daily to declutter your space. Don’t forget to shred, clean, and give away old files, clothes, paper, furniture, and other material items you don’t use. Your energy will thank you for the space, which is now unencumbered and allows you to create what’s next.
  9. Indulge in Joy. Allow yourself a favorite snack, a movie, book, or a hobby and participate without guilt.
  10. Brag. Use a tracker on your smart phone or watch when exercising or walking. Write down daily accomplishments in your “brag” journal. Share with friends, and even your boss. This builds self‑trust, self-confidence, and the momentum required to move forward!

These 10 habits will have you celebrating yourself. And celebrating yourself is the key to showing up more and more in your own life. Once you engage in these habits, what great rewards are now showing up for you?

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Showing up for yourself requires YOU. Schedule your Legacy Coaching Session today and take the first step toward moving forward in a career, pursuing a goal, or simply enjoying your life more. Contact me for a confidential conversation.

How to Use Adversity to Make You Stronger

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Adversity has always been part of leadership. What matters most is how you choose to respond to it. Every challenge offers lessons that can strengthen your leadership and open the door to new opportunities.

In leadership, adversity is any disruption that forces change before you feel ready. (Let’s be honest … we’re never ready.) It can be external, internal, or a mix of both — and every leader encounters it. The difference between thriving and struggling often comes down to how you respond. And, believe it or not, you have a choice.

Adversity also brings uncertainty, frustration, fear, and even grief. These reactions are normal. Acknowledging your feelings and facts are the first step toward moving forward with clarity and strength.

Attempting to avoid adversity has negative consequences. When leaders ignore breakdowns or lie about mistakes or failures, they repeat mistakes, lose credibility, and weaken team trust. Innovation slows, and opportunities slip away. In addition, top team members leave (some while still collecting their paychecks).

Addressing adversity head-on prevents these costly setbacks. Working through adversity is never an easy process, especially when you’re not ready for it. But the good news is, you can do it. Remember, your team takes its cues from you. When you do the work, they follow your lead. When you avoid it, they mirror that too. Your willingness to grow, directly influences your team’s ability to navigate adversity and come out stronger.

7 Tips to Make You and Your Team Stronger

Get Real About What Happened. Everyone has experienced mistakes, failures, and unexpected adversity. There’s no shame in it. Breakdowns in projects and relationships can be due to things you did or didn’t do, and include relying on the way things have been done in the past. Some life and business disasters are beyond your control. Regardless, it’s important that you stop and assess what truly happened and tell the truth. Putting frosting on mud pie and calling it a cake doesn’t change it from a mud pie!

TIP: Take time to objectively review what happened using both good and not-so-good numbers and metrics. This process will tell you a story if you listen. Then, you are ready to move forward powerfully.

For example, Brad faced a major team conflict and hoped it would get resolved without him having to do anything. But after talking with his executive coach, he learned that was a fool’s game. So he prepared, talked with the team about his understanding of the conflict and asked the team for their input. Then, they brainstormed solutions. The following week, the team was working together and producing intended results the customer required. What had happened? Brad didn’t allow adversity to win — and neither did the team. Once he finally listened, allowed initiatives and let the team step up, the adversity that they had allow to stall them, lost its power.

Let Go of the Old. Emotional attachments to practices and systems can keep adversity around for a long time. Instead, look to see what is no longer working: system, hiring practices, team interactions, conflicts, or task assignments (to name a few).

TIP: If there is a team conflict, get it resolved. If you have a poor working relationship with a co-worker or boss, get it resolved. I think you get the idea …

Develop Empathy and Compassion. This can be difficult when you have little empathy for yourself and others. Seeing situations from others’ points of view makes it easier for people to feel heard by you. It also becomes easier for them to listen to you!

TIP: To develop your empathy skills and inner compassion, talk with a qualified coach or therapist, and do the inner work required. While there are also books and videos to guide the process and awareness … these do not replace working with a good therapist. Remember, there are no shortcuts!

Develop Inner Confidence. Fake it until you make it is an old cliché where people imitated confidence, competence, and an optimistic mindset. But fake confidence can be easily spotted and creates distrust. Instead, develop true inner confidence which in turn creates success.

TIP: To develop your inner confidence, work on a project with your team. Hire the right coach to guide you and the team along the way to ensure success and keep everyone focused.

Be Responsible for What You Are Saying and Sharing. Today’s focus on authenticity and transparency can backfire when sharing TMI (too much information). It can damage relationships and the ability of people to trust you! This includes what you share with customers and top talent.

TIPS:

  • Keep a private journal and write down your thoughts and feelings. Not everything needs to be shared.
  • Develop mindful resilience by forgiving yourself and others. (This is an inner exercise for you only. Do not tell others, “I forgive you.” Why? Because doing so only creates more adversity.)
  • Work with your coach and craft conversation points to share with your team and customers when sharing stories, bad news, or taking a new direction.

Focus Forward. Stop rehashing what happened in the past (and any personal wounds) and focus conversations on where you are going. Include sharing the actions you and your team are taking, and the results you are experiencing. This is how you look for new opportunities inside adversity.

TIP: Work with a trained facilitator to guide you and your team to uncover new systems, products, and services.

Practice Thanks! Everyone loves appreciation. Saying “please”, “thank you”, and “great work” is important. When done authentically, your teams grow and your customers feel valued.

TIP: Get your copy of Get Your Brag On! Learn how to brag yourself and your team. Then, share with confidence the successes you, and your team and customers have had without sounding like a braggart!

It takes brave and committed leaders to use adversity as a launching pad to transform a situation, project, and/or relationship into a positive outcome. Doing it in an effective way creates the opportunities for you to grow stronger.

© Jeannette Seibly, 2021–2026

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

Adversity will always be part of leadership. When you choose to learn from it, you strengthen your leadership, your team, and your ability to seize new opportunities. Contact me for additional insights

Your Next Chapter Starts When You Turn the Page

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Turning the page can be hard. We are comfortable staying stuck where we are. When we’re comfortable, we don’t have to think or expend energy. We often justify why we are where we are and stay stuck while waiting for permission to change.

The challenge is … during these ruminations … we allow uncertainty, lack of control, and fear of the unknown to keep us stuck. Our internal voices label our dreams as unimportant and often disparage them as too risky, maybe later we will (retirement, children out of the home), or it’s too expensive (money, relationships).

Yet, pursuing your dreams requires you to turn the page and move forward into the uncomfortable and unknown … the next chapter.

Why is fulfilling your dream important? Because your dreams will die … simply vanish if you do nothing. Your heart and soul, which support your quality of life, may feel a void or an unfulfilled purpose. Also, there’s an inner power and confidence that naturally emerges — “I did it!”—when you’ve turned the page and have actually done it.

Now’s the Time to Name the Moment

Many of us know when we’ve outgrown our current chapter. Whether it be in the job, waiting for that promotion, being open to freelancing, writing a book, traveling to Europe, or rock climbing. Your resistance shows up in stagnation, misalignment, or a quiet inner nudge that you’ve gotten really good at ignoring.

How to Move Forward

First, acknowledge what’s ending before creating what’s on your ‘blank’ next page.

  • Make a list of at least ten things that have been working for you. Use numbers and other metrics to give them the umph needed to make you smile. (See Chapter 20 in Get Your Brag On!)
  • Next, make a list of at least ten things that did not work, but you had set as a goal or wish. Again, use numbers and other metrics to get the full impact. (See Chapter 20 in Get Your Brag On!)
  • Now, write down three things you wish to celebrate about yourself. Get in front of a mirror and acknowledge yourself. Felt good, didn’t it?

Before your afterglow is gone, write down the dream you’ve been avoiding. Don’t water it down … if you wish to travel to Paris, don’t write down Baltimore. Then, let go of what no longer fits your goals, values, or legacy.

Example: Leaving Michigan was harder than I expected. I felt every mile of that drive until the moment I crossed the state line. Then something shifted. The rearview mirror stopped pulling at me, and the road ahead finally felt like mine. Moving to Colorado wasn’t just a relocation — it was stepping into my next chapter, a life I’d been dreaming about for years.

Turning the page and claiming your new direction requires taking those critical first steps. Make them small enough to prevent your fear mongers from kicking in … and they will … loudly! Define what you want more of. If it’s free time, schedule it. If it’s reading more, schedule it. And then, honor your schedule.

You only need to identify the next right step—not the whole roadmap.

Move forward with the new commitment. Each day, take a small step in the right direction. Remember, action creates momentum. Your actions signal to the old page you’ve been clinging to that you’ve turned to the new page.

While the new page may only offer silence at this time, remember, you’re taking small steps toward removing uncertainty, the need to control, and the fear of the unknown. During this time, those pesky—but often fine‑tuned—feelings turn into thoughts of fear, self-doubt, and disbelief. They will pop up and stay as long as you keep allowing them to be in charge.

It’s time to write your next chapter and create what’s next by taking action.

Examples include:

  • Work with a professional résumé writer to get that new job.
  • Write out your brags to prepare asking for a pay raise, getting the promotion, or showing you are ready for the next opportunity. (I remember one woman being upset because she wouldn’t ask for more money—she assumed others should offer!)
  • Write a “shitty first draft” (something I learned to do—thank you, @Erica Holthausen). Don’t edit or correct grammar or look things up. Just write. Then, put it aside for 24 hours. Now, the first draft is done.
  • Read, watch videos, take classes, and listen to others who have been there and done that. (Caution: beware of scammers or those who overpromise to do the work for you. They can sound very legitimate until you read the fine print or learn they really don’t have the necessary experience.)

(Bonus) Learn Meditation or Other Ways to Sit in Silence

Silence can help you clarify what’s next, keep you moving forward when you feel stuck, or simply help you relax (which we all need in this chaotic world). The blank space of this next chapter allows you to create and write down what’s next. Your dreams have been waiting in the silence you’ve been afraid to pursue. With meditation or sitting in silence, you can clarify them, continue moving forward, and build.

Something I learned that has helped me: While there are many meditation and mindfulness activities (Google or ask AI), here’s one I just learned. It’s called shamatha-vipashyana (tranquility–insight) and is outlined in Pema Chödrön’s new book, Another Kind of Freedom.

Sit up straight (on the floor or in a chair). Place your hands on your lap. Inhale slowly. Exhale slowly. Do this for at least 10 minutes. During this time, you will have many thoughts pop into your head. Simply say, “Thought.” Nothing more. Don’t make it mean anything.

I found this to be a steadying practice that brought clarity when I needed it most. It is a surprisingly effective way to interrupt fear, doubt, and overthinking.

To learn more, get her book at your favorite retailer or library. Don’t forget to get your copy of Get Your Brag On! to support your next chapter and legacy.

As always, call me for any legacy coaching support you need!

© Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Your next chapter won’t write itself. Let’s talk. Schedule your Legacy Coaching Session today and take the first step toward the dream you’ve been ignoring. Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Coaching Removes the Ways We Self Sabotage

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Successful leaders and bosses know that having a coach isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. While business professionals believe the do-it-yourself approach works just fine, many learn the hard way it doesn’t work. Doing it yourself is how we self-sabotage our progress, awareness, and ability to move upward.

Many up-and-coming leaders quit, change their goal to reflect what progress they have made, or fall victim to the allure of some shiny object. At that point, the goal of being a leader has been sidelined, dreams diminished, and the vision for success forgotten. This happens more often than leaders realize.

In today’s 2026 workplace—where hybrid teams, AI-driven decisions, rapid change, and increased burnout are the norm—these patterns of self-sabotage are even more costly. Uncovering the ways we self-sabotage is why we need the right coach. Having the right coach allows you to get real about your goals, keeps you focused, and reawakens your commitment to succeed. It’s a critical component to your success as a leader.

11 Self‑Sabotaging Beliefs That Hold Leaders Back

  1. I can do it myself. Unfortunately, many DIYers think they can be their own coach. Listening to yourself is a fool’s game and rarely gets you to where you want to go. In 2026, self-coaching is even harder with constant workplace noise, shifting priorities, and increased pressure to perform.
  2. A good coach needs a certification. Certificate programs can be helpful and provide technical skills. However, the right coach with experience, powerful listening skills, and the ability to customize ideas to your unique situation is far more powerful. That kind of skill can only be learned by a coach with extensive experience.
  3. It’s too expensive. Not necessarily. How much are your career, time, family and financial future worth? Today’s leaders also recognize the cost of burnout, stalled promotions, and poor team relationships—areas where coaching pays for itself.
  4. My company won’t pay for it, so it must not be important. There comes a time when you have to value yourself, your career, and be willing to invest in both to ensure your success. Many companies today expect leaders to take ownership of their own development.
  5. Coaching is only for people who don’t have what it takes. Wrong! Coaching is for anyone and everyone wanting to take the next step up in their career. Every great leader has a coach! Having a confidential sounding board helps you become aware of your blind spots and transform them. Yes, everyone has blind spots … including you!
  6. If you work harder, you will be successful. Working harder is not the answer. Working smarter, not harder, means doing things in a way that is effective and efficient, and gives you the ability to achieve intended results. The right coach will guide you to work smarter—especially important now with AI tools, hybrid teams, and constant change.
  7. I’m doing fine and don’t need a coach to prepare me for the next step. This a very common blind spots for many leaders. Remember, moving up often requires knowing the “unwritten rules and practices.” Today, these rules are even more complex due to remote visibility challenges, shifting alliances, and evolving expectations.
  8. I have friends and family who provide me with lots of advice. Yes, many people do. While they mean well, most friends and family members don’t have the courage to tell you what you really need to hear. And, they lack the experience at your new level. As a result, you miss out on the critical factors required to make better decisions, build stronger teams, and achieve intended results. This is exactly why you need the right coach.
  9. I have too much work to do and cannot take on anything else. If this describes you, coaching should be at the top of your list. Most coaching comes just in time, when you need it and when it can provide the greatest impact. In 2026, leaders who delay getting support often experience burnout or stalled careers and missed opportunities.
  10. I’ve already hit the glass ceiling and no coach can change that. Nonsense! Anyone can be a successful leader with the right coach navigating them forward. Additionally, success today is about more than just technical and financial skills. It requires being forward-thinking, team-oriented, and goal-driven … all areas where the right coach makes a huge difference. Today, relationship intelligence (RQ) and credibility are now essential, in addition to emotional intelligence (EI) and emotional integrity.
  11. My assessment says I’m doing just fine. Most assessments are not focused on job-fit and becoming an effective leader. This is a major form of self‑sabotage. Many leaders rely on personality tests, team‑building tools, or “fun” assessments that have nothing to do with developing leadership. When you use the wrong type of assessment, you get misleading data, overlook real issues, and make decisions based on how people want to be seen rather than how they actually think, behave, and perform on the job. In 2026, with increased complexity, hybrid work, and rapid decision cycles, leaders cannot afford guesswork. Only qualified, validated job‑fit assessments provide the objective data needed to hire, promote, and coach effectively. Only work with coaches that use them.

When you uncover the ways you self‑sabotage, you will see that hiring the right coach is the most critical component for your success. In today’s fast-changing workplace, you cannot afford to rely on outdated beliefs or go it alone. What are you waiting for?

© Jeannette Seibly, 2018–2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

Your leadership and legacy depend on the decisions you make now. If you’re ready to elevate your influence, strengthen key relationships, and accelerate your career in today’s fast‑moving environment, it’s time to get the support that gets results. Let’s start the conversation today.

When You Need to Make Life Changes, How Do You Handle Old Relationships?

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At 55+, stepping into a new chapter of being a leader and an advocate, and navigating life changes isn’t about learning how to lead — you’ve already done that throughout your career. It’s about the shift in your priorities and how those shifts impact long‑standing relationships. Over the years, people have relied on your friendship, your influence, and your support … and now you’re sharpening your focus on what matters most to you. And, that may no longer include them.

Long‑standing friendships can shift in unexpected ways as you enter this new chapter, and the power dynamics shift too. Some friends may no longer feel as connected, as equal, or as comfortable as they once did. That’s when you discover who truly supports your continued success, who stands with you through life’s ups and downs, and who you can keep close.

Over the past couple of years, as I’ve stepped into a new chapter of leadership, I’ve noticed subtle shifts in a few long‑standing friendships. People who once reached out regularly or valued my perspective became quieter and less engaged. One friend, who had often asked for my insight, pulled back and later commented to others, “She’s in a different place now.”

That moment reminded me of something important: when your life evolves — especially later in your life and career — not everyone knows how to adjust. Your priorities shift, your boundaries strengthen, and your influence changes. Some friends adapt with you. Some leave quietly. Others struggle with the transition, even if they never say it directly.

Remember, good and supportive friends don’t compete with you, punish you for changing, or demand you stay the same. They respect your new boundaries and responsibilities. They help you celebrate and get your brag on while giving you space to do what you need to do.

While everyone needs good relationships — and they are a major part of life — you may need to create new guidelines for supportive friends who stay:

  • Shift what you share and talk about.
  • Maintain connection differently (e.g., emails, texts).
  • Protect attention to different confidentiality and ethics issues that arise.

How to Handle Friends Who Unfriend You (or Quietly Pull Away)

Some friends will resent your changes. Some will quietly withdraw.

When friends unfriend you:

  • Accept the shift instead of chasing them
  • Don’t defend yourself or justify your changes or new successes
  • Don’t internalize their jealousy or insecurity
  • Stay factual and professional if their criticism spills into the workplace or with other friends
  • Don’t diminish or let go of the progress you’ve made

Remember, life changes … and so do you, especially at this time in your life. It’s time to develop friendships that support your life and career changes.

Friends You May Need to Unfriend

In this legacy phase of your career, you naturally become more selective about who has access to you. Not everyone can go with you into your next chapter — and that’s not failure. That’s wisdom.

Some friendships become liabilities when you hang on too long. They:

  • Expect more than you can give
  • Gossip or undermine your credibility
  • Make inappropriate comments at your expense (e.g., diminish your successes, or dismiss your changes as important)
  • Violate ethics or ask you to overlook their behavior

Clinging to old friendships causes a loss of self. Don’t hang on — move on. It’s a signal to develop new relationships in this new phase of your life.

How to Handle Your New Role and Your Friends

  • Don’t share confidential information about the past
  • Don’t overshare about your changes
  • Let your actions speak for themselves
  • Avoid being pulled backwards (it’s sneaky)
  • Don’t let old loyalties compromise you, your life, or what’s next

How to have the “tough” conversations with current friends:

  • Initiate conversations and stop waiting for your “friend” to do so
  • Don’t ghost them or ignore them if they reach out
  • Meet and share, in general terms, your new focus
  • Honor your inner power and don’t let anyone violate it
  • Don’t become their coach, instead remain their friend

Don’t be afraid to:

  • Talk with a therapist about changes occurring in your life
  • Work with an executive “legacy” coach to guide you forward
  • Invite new people for lunch, dinner, or get‑togethers — many have amazing stories that will inspire you
  • Value those long‑term friendships that make you feel good
  • Stop waiting for permission and make long overdue changes

Your legacy is shaped not only by what you achieve, but by the relationships you can and nurture and the ones you release. Protecting your emotional well‑being, your ethics, and your leadership presence is part of leaving a strong legacy.

© Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Your legacy won’t wait — and neither should you. If you’re experiencing shifting friendships, new responsibilities, or changing priorities, now is the time to get the clarity and support you need. Contact me today and take the next step toward the legacy and future you’re building.

When You Step into Leadership, How Do You Handle Your Relationships with Friends?

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When you become a leader, it exposes who is genuinely for you and who only supported you when you stayed at their level. Some friends will celebrate you. Others will criticize, distance themselves, or resent your success.

Years ago, my employer offered an education reimbursement program that I took advantage of and got my Master’s Degree. Then, I stepped into a new leadership role. When I hosted a celebration several friends who attended told me about another friend who wasn’t there. The absentee friend had told everyone, “She doesn’t deserve success since the company paid for the degree.”

That moment made something very clear to me: not everyone adjusts well when you are successful.

Supportive friends don’t compete with you, punish you for succeeding, or demand insider information. They respect boundaries and your new responsibilities. They help you celebrate and get your brag on!

As the new leader, keeping and building relationships is important. It’s a major part of your new job.

With friends, you’ll need to:

  • Shift what you share and talk about
  • Maintain connection outside work
  • Protect confidentiality and ethics
  • Avoid talking about work the way you used to
  • You’ll need to keep supportive friends who stay in your life with the new rules

How to Handle Friends Who Unfriend You (or Quietly Pull Away)

Some so-called friends will resent your promotion, question your worthiness, or feel threatened. There will always be naysayers. Others may feel you’ve changed. While you may deny you’ve changed and believe it’s just a new job title, keep in mind: You will need to grow and transform with your new leadership opportunity … so change is inevitable.

When friends unfriend you:

  • Accept the shift instead of chasing them
  • Don’t defend your promotion or justify your success
  • Don’t internalize their jealousy or insecurity
  • Stay factual and professional if their criticism spills into the workplace

Remember, you did the work. It may be time to get new friends

Friends You May Need to Unfriend

Friends who rely on external accolades and put you at the mercy of others’ opinions are the ones to release. These types of friendships become liabilities when you become a leader, especially when they:

  • Expect favoritism
  • Demand insider information
  • Pressure you to take their side
  • Gossip or undermine your credibility
  • Disagree with company politics and expect you to change it
  • Make inappropriate comments at your expense
  • Violate ethics or ask you to overlook their behavior

Remember, if you support a friend who has violated ethical issues, management will no longer trust you to do the right things. This can be career-killing now and in the future.

Also, when a friend becomes toxic or misaligned with your new responsibilities, you may need to step back or walk away entirely. Clinging to old friendships will cause you to lose authority.

How to Handle Your New Role and Your Friends

Lead with boundaries since you are now “company management.”

  • Don’t share confidential information
  • Don’t play favorites
  • Don’t let old loyalties compromise fairness or achieving the intended results

Have the tough conversations by initiating conversations and stop waiting for your “friend” to do so.

  • Don’t ghost them or ignore them
  • Meet outside work
  • Outline what topics are allowed, then, honor that boundary
  • Keep it personal, not professional
  • Don’t become their coach, instead remain their friend

Don’t be afraid to let go and move on when a “friend:”

  • Resents you
  • Gossips about you
  • Pressures you
  • Undermines you
  • Cannot handle your new authority
  • Abuses your friendship (“She’ll tell me… we’re good friends.”)

Moving on will require new friends. Join professional and trade groups. Meet 1:1 with others since it is a great way to develop and build new relationships. This process will lessen the emotional need to hang on to old friendships that have moved on without you.

Leadership changes relationships. Some friends rise with you. Some fall away. Some you must release to protect your credibility, ethics, and authority.

As you move forward, get the advice and support you need. Hire an executive coach. This is critical because leaders are responsible for building and maintaining relationships. The right coach provides clarity, confidence, and guidance as you navigate new expectations, shift relationships (including friendships), and accept the realities of leadership.

Note: When your friend receives a new job, be sure to:

  • Congratulate your friend when something good happens
  • Not hold a grudge
  • Remember, life is not a competition

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

If you’re ready to strengthen your leadership and develop and build new and strong relationships with confidence, contact me. Let’s talk about your next steps.

Are You Ignoring Your Dreams? Activate Your Inner Power

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Let’s start with the truth—your truth.

You have goals, dreams, and a purpose that won’t leave you alone. They show up in the shower, on your commute, while paying bills, and especially when life feels too small. And yet…

  • You have ideas but no money or time.
  • You hope “someday” life will change.
  • You have ambition, but lack clarity.
  • You’re waiting for a pathway to appear.
  • Your ego whispers, “If I fail, I’ll look foolish.”

Here’s the reality: every idea, goal, dream, and purpose has the potential to fulfill your human spirit.

You are powerful. You can create your life when you choose to do so.

But life happens. Crisis hits. Responsibilities pile up. And while life shifts, your dreams often don’t. They become a quiet longing you postpone until:

  • the kids are grown
  • you retire
  • you have more money
  • you feel ready
  • someone gives you permission

Or your dream grows louder—but you still don’t pursue it.

Why? Because you’re waiting for the perfect moment, partner, bank account, or sign. But perfection never shows up. Opportunities rarely arrive at the “right” time. And distractions make it easy to miss what’s right in front of you.

Life opens doors when you are in focused action—not when you’re waiting.

The #1 Reason You’re Stuck

If you’re listening to the chatter in your head … those buzzing mental mosquitos:

  • “I don’t have time or money.”
  • “I’m not ready.”
  • “What if I fail?”
  • “What will people think?”
  • “What if I choose wrong?”

These thoughts don’t disappear on their own. Transform them through taking small steps, the antidote to fear, procrastination, and self-sabotage.

When Is the Right Time?

Now.
Not later.
Not when you feel motivated.
Not when the stars align.

Motivation is created by action not the other way around.

Why You Keep Sabotaging Yourself

Because you’re following feelings, emotions, and intuition without clarity or structure.

  • Your gut is a tool—not a strategy.
  • Your emotions are signals—not instructions.
  • Your intuition is a nudge—not a plan.

When your inner voice says, “Get into action,” you keep waiting, suffering, and hoping. But hope without action becomes disappointment.

The truth is simple: You keep dreaming your dream instead of taking small steps necessary to achieve it.

I Know This Pattern Because I’ve Lived It

I’ve achieved many results and I’ve also resisted, delayed, doubted, and sabotaged myself. Yet every time I took action, even imperfect action, I survived. I learned. I grew.

Dream fulfilled:

  • I moved from Michigan to Colorado with very little money.
  • I started a 501(c)(3) with no funding and was profitable the first year.
  • I published 11 books—four became Amazon Best Sellers.
  • I became a professional speaker and won “People’s Choice Award for Best Speaker.”
  • I started my own company when being a woman consultant triggered outright resistance, and guided the creation of three millionaires and hundreds of six‑figure professionals.

You may be thinking, “Good for you, but I’m not capable of that.”

Yes, you are!

You are powerful.
But inner power unused becomes pain.
Power ignored becomes regret.
Power suppressed becomes self-doubt.

How to Activate Your Inner Power

  1. Take One Small Step Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Write it down. Do it now.
  2. Build a Team One at a Time. No one succeeds alone. Who do you know that can support you moving forward? Have a conversation with them.
  3. Immerse Yourself. Be curious. Learn. Explore. Read. Listen to Videos. Journal.
  4. Feel the Fear and Move Forward Anyway. Fear means you’re expanding. Acknowledge it.
  5. Use the Power of Balance. Ask: Does this energize me or drain me? Listen. Adapt.
  6. Handle Your Life. Clear the clutter—mental and physical. Start with a clean desk, kitchen, inbox.
  7. Hire the Right Coach. A real coach brings clarity, accountability, and momentum. Hire one today.

Your Inner Power Is Calling Now

  • Take one step.
  • Build your team one person at a time.
  • Say “Yes!” to the dream that refuses to leave you alone.

Your life is waiting. Activate your inner power and step into it now.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 – 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Activate your inner power by taking the next step. If 55+ and ready, I’m here to guide you in moving forward. Contact me and get started today.

Want to Be a Great Leader? Create Your Successor Now

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Being a great leader requires preparing your success for a smooth transition, now! Not later.

However, many leaders fear stepping aside.

  • They wait too long.
  • They allow egos to get in the way.
  • They wait until it’s too late due to mental health issues, physical disability, or death.

In fact, many times they leave the job or company, or bide their time hoping no one will notice there is no successor in place.

The other excuse many current leaders face when selecting a successor, is that many potential future leaders are uncertain if they wish to become future leaders. Often, this is due to lack of preparation: training, development, coaching, and being given opportunities now to learn from mistakes and failures, and successes too.

To effectively prepare your successor requires objective insights, accountability for real behavior changes, and a confidential space to work through real issues.

What Can You Do to Prepare Your Potential Successors?

Create Your Own Future. Too often, if you are hanging on too long, you don’t have a “What’s Next?” planned for yourself. But the truth is, you won’t be in your current position forever. So instead of continuing to talk about your future, make excuses, create issues, and ignore the focused action required to move on, hire an executive coach and make a legacy plan. Now, implement the plan.

Assess Who’s Next. When you have a key employee designated to step up, they may not have the skills and talents to do so at this time. Or, they are a great #2 person but do not have the ability or desire to become the #1 leader to move a business or team forward. While they may say they are interested, now’s the time to discover the truth.

Create an individualized succession plan and use an objective job fit and leadership assessment. This is critical in determining job fit in the new role. Use the assessment to guide your conversations and listen for consistency in their responses. Review their results to see where the gaps are, then provide the tools, resources, and coaching required to win. Objective, external insight is essential for successful successor plans, since internal relationships and politics often prevent honest conversations about readiness.

Hire an Executive Coach Now. Hire an executive coach to guide the future successor(s).  Using an executive coach from outside the company ensures any growth and development issues that might occur and limit the future leader remain confidential. An external coach also provides the accountability required to ensure new behaviors stick, something internal leaders often struggle to enforce without damaging relationships that are often overlooked by the boss, HR, and other insiders.

We all have our challenges. These should not restrict any future leader’s ability to move forward if the person has done the work, is ready, and there are no ethical or other integrity issues in the way. If there are issues, address them now, or move on to another person.

Remember, future leaders need a confidential space to work through fears, mistakes, and real challenges — something they cannot safely do with their mentor, boss, peers, or HR.

Select an Internal Mentor Now. The mentor’s role is to guide the future leader through industry, company, and professional changes, and provide executive sponsorship. Many mentors don’t make great coaches due to time limitations, and lack of effective coaching experience. The other consideration is confidentiality. Having a mentor as a coach can limit job transition or promotion opportunities if the future leader is going through a challenging work situation or difficult period in life. Again, if the person does the work, is ready, and has no ethical or other integrity issues, continue to move forward!

Invest in Training and Development. Have your potential successor attend leadership workshops to develop their interpersonal, emotional intelligence, managerial, and leadership effectiveness. Ensure, along with their coach and mentor, these new skills and awareness are being used appropriately and effectively. As mentioned at the beginning of this article, learning to be a leader is a process, not an event. It takes time, and requires holding them accountable and practicing the right skills.

Provide the Opportunities. Now is an excellent time to get them involved in company teams, critical client challenges, trade and professional associations, and other leadership opportunities. Hold them accountable for results, communication efforts, decisions, and the ability to work well with anyone, anywhere and at any time. While you know you can do it faster (and possibly better), you may have forgotten it’s because of your long-time experience. Allow your successor to develop their own experiences (and stories) while you can provide the benefits of your knowledge and guidance.

What Do You Do When the Person Changes Their Mind? This important question is often ignored. Have a conversation to learn why – it may take more than one. The purpose is to determine where you have made the process too difficult, or the person just isn’t the right one. But do not spend time attempting to talk the person into changing their mind — this rarely works out well for anyone. Move on to another person since you should always have more than one key employee who could become a successor.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024-2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

Your legacy depends on more than training your successor. It requires preparing them with the insight, accountability, and support they need for success. If you’re ready to build the kind of future required for both yourself and your successor(s),  contact me and we’ll talk through your next steps.

Want to Be a Better Leader? Learn How to Brag

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  • Do you have confidence, but downplay your results?
  • Do you believe if you had anything to brag about, others would brag for you?
  • Do you believe humble bragging is OK, since it shouldn’t upset anyone?

In my many years of delivering the award-winning Get Your Brag On! presentation, I still find that many women and men downplay their value, success, and awesomeness. Why is this important? Effective leaders share their accomplishments with confidence. It encourages their team(s) to share their successes and wins, which inspires others.

Too many talented leaders are overlooked not because they lack results, but because they stay quiet about them. Jeannette Seibly

Recently, during a presentation, a highly qualified woman whispered to me, “I thought my work would speak for itself.” It hadn’t. Her less-experienced colleague, who confidently shared his wins, was promoted instead. This is a common scenario and underscores why bragging matters.

Savvy bragging is easy, but we make it hard. It should be easy, sharing factual accomplishments using metrics, results, and impact in a clear, business-relevant way. Unfortunately, our fear gets in the way.

Stop Downplaying Your Accomplishments!

Bragging is not arrogant, selfish, exaggeration, or taking credit away from the team. These myths keep people silent. Silence is not humility. Humble bragging is nonsense! (WSJ) It’s self-sabotage — and it costs you influence, opportunities, and money.

Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway

  • Let go of your fears. If someone doesn’t like you, bragging won’t change their opinion.
  • If others are jealous of your success, they won’t suddenly want you on their team.
  • Stop trying to win approval.
  • In business, do you only want to be liked, or do you want to achieve results and make money while doing so?

Ironically, when you build true inner confidence, people are more likely to like you … and want to work with you. That is the mark of an effective leader.

Why Sharing Your Wins Matters

Savvy bragging is a career and business strategy that:

  • Gets you hired
  • Gets you promoted
  • Closes sales
  • Builds credibility and inner confidence
  • Differentiates you from competitors
  • Increases visibility and influence
  • Strengthens your professional reputation
  • Opens doors to awards, opportunities, and leadership roles

When you don’t communicate your value, decision-makers will assume you don’t have any. Jeannette Seibly

When you brag effectively, something shifts. You stand taller. People listen differently. Doors open that were previously closed. People want to work with you and be on your team.

Effective Savvy Bragging Is an Art

Imagine walking into a meeting knowing your results are known, respected, and valued — before you even speak. That’s the power of smart bragging. This requires speaking in the business language of numbers, metrics, and accomplishments. Many people fear math; but every businessperson knows their numbers and other metrics, and how and when to share them.

A simple structure helps:

  • State the accomplishment.
  • Add two metrics or measurable results.
  • State the impact or benefit.

Examples of effective bragging

  • “I reduced customer complaints by 37% in six months.”
  • “I led a 10-person cross-functional team that delivered a $2.5M project on time and under budget.”
  • “I improved employee retention by 18% by delivering 10 coaching and development programs.”

These statements are confident, factual, and compelling. They grab others’ attention and make a positive impact.

Be Authentic and Don’t Exaggerate

After presenting Get Your Brag On! to a group of consultants, a woman insisted, “Everyone lies and cannot tell the truth about their accomplishments!” In my experience, most people struggle to be authentic and tell the truth about what they’ve accomplished.

The lesson: be honest. If someone discovers you lied, it will hurt your credibility now and in the future.

While many people are taught to tone down their achievements, it’s usually at your own expense.

Instead, own your greatness, your achievements, and see what new opportunities open up.

How Do I Get Started?

Grab your copy of Get Your Brag On! Complete the five simple written exercises in the book. (For job seekers, use The Secret to Winning the Job: Start Bragging.) In a short period of time, you will be bragging in a savvy, effective, and confident voice. Your inner confidence, team, boss, company, and customers will applaud you.

© Jeannette Seibly 2019–2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Remember, too many leaders — current and future — downplay their accomplishments. Self-deprecation doesn’t attract others to you. Savvy and effective bragging does. Share your achievements in a business-savvy way, and be taken seriously as a leader … savvy bragging ensures you can. What are you waiting for?

Accountability Is a Leader’s Greatest Weakness

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Many companies today are experiencing rapid change. With growth come gaps in leaders’ ability to improve revenues and results. These gaps often stem from leaders relying on easy-to-work-with relationships, likability, or mediocre communication skills as substitutes for delivering measurable outcomes.

While many companies value a current or future leader’s ability to build relationships, communicate effectively, and make good decisions, the reality is that many do not hold these leaders accountable for producing intended results, and developing the skills required to do so. As a result, only 10% of teams are actually producing intended outcomes. This costs companies the retention of top talent and customers. It also puts leaders’ jobs at risk.

In one company, a team missed quarterly goals for six straight quarters—not because of lack of talent, but because no one required follow-through. Once accountability systems were put in place, the team hit their goals over the next two quarters.

What is Accountability? It means honoring commitments, owning the process and the outcome, and ensuring the work gets done as promised. Without accountability, even strong skills and good intentions fail to produce intended results.

How to Improve Accountability

Be Responsible for Clarity of Expectations. Lacking clarity, developing real goals, and taking action can be difficult when a leader or boss fails to check in with progress or diminishes or dismisses new ideas or resources as viable possibilities. When you are clear about what is expected by your boss, company, and/or client, you must be accountable for ensuring progress to achieve it. Clear expectations prevent assumptions, excuses, and reworks—three of the biggest drains on results.

Keep It Simple and On-Track. This is a corollary to expectations. When you make it complicated, constantly change your focus, or chase “shiny objects” that have no direct bearing on the tasks at hand, team members stop. They simply stop doing the work and stop communicating. Get them back in action by staying focused and speaking in a manner others understand and can support. Simple systems such as weekly priorities, short check-ins, and visible scoreboards help teams stay aligned and accountable.

Have Those Tough and Not-So-Easy Conversations. Many times, leaders get fearful when they lack specifics about an employee’s so-so or mediocre performance. Or they fear blowback if the person is well-liked on the team but not highly effective. Not holding team members accountable—and not providing laser-like coaching—takes an otherwise good employee and makes them less effective. Take time. Talk with your executive coach. Ensure what you believe is the problem actually is the problem, and not based on gossip or others’ misperceived beliefs. Avoiding these conversations sends an unintended message: mediocre performance is acceptable.

Become Resilient. Yes, there will be mistakes and failures. Instead of wallowing in them or relying on excuses, get yourself and your team clear by using asking ‘What Worked?’ and ‘What Didn’t Work?’ Then brainstorm solutions for what was missed, overlooked, or ignored. Hold people accountable by having them get back to you by a specific time. If they fail to do so, reach out with a reminder. Resilience, especially when you believe you “shouldn’t have to,” keeps accountability from sliding into blame. And blame is where many leaders unintentionally shut down performance.

Stay Connected. Consistent connection eliminates surprises and is one of the biggest reasons leaders struggle with accountability. Feedback, 1:1 meetings, and scoreboards help keep everyone on track and in action. It starts with you, as the leader, staying in communication with your boss. Also, be accountable to your team. Hold weekly meetings and keep them short and on-point. When you stay connected with your team and team members, they will amaze you.

Hold Yourself Accountable. This can be more difficult than holding your team accountable. Listen and document when you make promises or say you will do something. Follow up and follow through with needed resources. Encourage initiatives. Talk with your executive coach consistently to ensure you’re aware of any potential pitfalls. Your team mirrors your behavior—your accountability sets the standard for theirs.

© Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

Want to become a stronger leader? Do you want a team that delivers instead of explains? Accountability is the place to start. If you’re ready to strengthen your leadership, improve your listening, and be held accountable, contact me. Let’s talk through your next steps.