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How Do You Quietly Hire Employees?

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Quiet hiring is a way to develop talent without hiring new employees or moving current employees to work when you cannot hire the right people. It was declared a new trend by Gartner, a technological research and consulting firm: Quiet hiring will open up new doors for retaining talent without the cost of a lengthy recruitment process.

While “quiet hiring” is new, the strategy is not. Wise companies have used “internal mobility or upskilling” to keep top talent for many years.

But before you jump on this “newest trend,” here are the issues to address before considering this strategy.

How to Use Quiet Hiring

Quiet hiring is how employers fill positions with current employees and leverage current talent. Normally, it’s done on a temporary basis, or you risk employment law issues.

For example:

  • If your company is a bank and needs someone at the teller window for several hours a day, it’s an excellent opportunity for a loan officer to learn more about the bank and its customers’ needs.
  • If your insurance company needs help in the claims department for a month, you may have one of your underwriters work there temporarily.
  • If your company is in any industry and needs help auditing for a quarter, you may place one of your IT people in that role.

What Are Three Criteria to Implement Quiet Hiring?

  1. It would be best if you had buy-in from your employees. Remember, any change can be scary to them. Be sure to communicate the intention, what is expected, and the benefits to everyone, not just those being “quietly hired” into new roles. Remember, it’s a temporary change and will not affect their benefits and compensation plans.
  2. How to Start the Conversation. You may say, “We/I value your contribution and would like to temporarily use you in a different role (or to take on additional responsibilities). Are you willing to do so?”
  3. Stay Connected. If there are problems before or after the transition, it’s essential to address them immediately. Remember that different teams have different work styles, and bosses have different work expectations (e.g., remote v. onsite, punctuality v. lateness).

How You Use Quiet Hiring to Improve Your Employees’ Skills

  1. Provides Skill Development. It’s a great way to help broaden an employee’s knowledge of the company. It allows them to experience how their normal position impacts the temporary one. Acquiring these new skills prepares them for promotions, new work teams, and other future opportunities.
  2. Reduces the Need for Layoffs and Terminations. It’s a great way to keep good employees by temporarily moving them into different roles or departments.
  3. Helps Them Understand the Impact of Work Quality and Decisions. The added benefit of quiet hiring is that they can learn about the impact they create when making changes in how they do their work or when making decisions. For example: Moving a sales rep into customer service is a great way to experience the aftermath of how the company’s products and services work with customers. (Also known as cross-training.)
  4. Training is Critical! Like anything new, it’s essential that you provide a training program and on-the-job training coach to ensure consistency in how work is done. Remember, they are transitioned to the new position temporar If they make any changes, it can inadvertently impact the entire company and its customers.
  5. Participate in Job Rotation or Job Sharing. These are more formal ways that “quiet hiring” top talent can develop the skills required for future opportunities.

Beware of “Quiet Hiring” Pitfalls

  1. Job Fit Issues. Placing a good employee in a position that does not fit their capabilities means you will lose a good employee. Use a qualified job fit assessment to reduce these types of issues. Remind them it’s temporary. However, if there are consistent problems, you must move them back to where they were doing well.
  2. Unwillingness to Move to New Position. If the move requires the person to be onsite or the person has other concerns such as commute and flex time, address them upfront. It costs time, money, and energy to train people in positions they usually don’t work in; since it’s only temporary, it may not be worth the effort or upset.
  3. Keep the Same Benefits and Comp. If you don’t, you will risk employment law concerns. Contact your HR or employment attorney to determine local, state, and federal impacts — also the same for international employees.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has over 30 years of award-winning international experience as an executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients surpass the norm by working through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about Quiet Hiring: This old employment practice of moving people temporarily into different positions now has a new name: Quiet Hiring! Before you jump on this latest trend, understand the legal, practical, and employee impacts before using! Then, contact me to talk through your hiring and selection challenges!

NOTE: Do you want to win? All leaders who are winners have coaches! I love coaching leaders and have for over 30 years! Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Having a coach speeds up your ability to influence others, hire the right people, and coach your team for unprecedented results.

Announcing New Workshop! Traditional leadership (e.g., formal, metrics-driven) is being replaced with human leadership (e.g., focus on the human dynamics that impact results). For example, “That’s how it’s always been done.” vs. “Great idea. How do you recommend we implement it?” However, your managers and directors are being overlooked regarding the training required to be an effective boss and leader. Read about my newest workshop: Are Your Managers and Directors Effective Leaders?

Why Are So Many Leaders Struggling Today? They Are Uncoachable!

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“Can you imagine wanting to win and ignoring the coach? Yet, many leaders refuse to be coachable.” Jeannette Seibly

Why is coaching essential today? The workplace has changed, and so have the unwritten rules. Trying to stay on top of people, projects, and performance while paying attention to profitability can be difficult. It’s why leaders must learn to be coachable but often are not due to ego, peer pressure, and fear of the unknown.

Why Being Coachable Causes Leaders to Win

Accelerate Self-Awareness. Being coachable helps leaders become mindful of what they do and say. As a result, they develop a deeper understanding of themselves and their motivations, leading to greater mindfulness, self-awareness, and personal fulfillment.

Develop Personal and Professional Growth. Being coachable allows leaders to reflect on their strengths and weaknesses, identify areas for improvement, and discover their blind spots. This process helps them grow and excel; two critical traits required to win.

Increase Effectiveness. Being coachable guides leaders to clarify their goals, create action plans, and be held accountable for their progress. This results in improved performance and increased effectiveness in their roles.

Improve Communication Skills. Being coachable also improves leaders’ abilities to develop their communication, listening, and speaking skills. These are critical to success in any role. Leaders and their teams win when they can articulate their vision, build consensus through team conflict, and negotiate more effectively!

Make Better Decisions. Being coachable helps leaders to clarify their values and priorities and to weigh the consequences of their decisions. Creating win-win-win outcomes due to informed and strategic decisions separates so-so leaders from those who excel and win.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has over 30 years of award-winning international experience as an executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients surpass the norm by working through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about being coachable: Imagine for a moment being part of a team of NFL players and ignoring the coach. Not going to happen! The team knows that being coachable is required to win the game. Yet, many leaders today are not coachable and make leadership harder than it is. As a result, they experience higher-than-average turnover, miscommunication, and failed team results. Contact me to talk through how to be coachable and win!

This week’s PODCAST: Listen to Want to Achieve Great Results? Use Peer Coaching with my guest, Meredith Bell, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

NOTE: Do you want to win? All leaders who are winners have coaches! I love coaching leaders and have for over 30 years! Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Having a coach will speed up your ability to influence others, hire the right people, and coach your team for unprecedented results.

Hey You! Are You Ignoring What Needs to Be Changed?

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“When you continue ignoring the need to make a difference, you’ll lose your ability to influence change.” Jeannette Seibly

Many leaders claim to be too busy and ignore the big picture and the details of a project or team. But the reality is, if you don’t pay attention, you will be even busier putting out fires, losing top talent and customers, and negatively impacting performance and profitability.

Definition of Ignore by Oxford Languages: “Refuse to take notice or acknowledge; disregard intentionally; fail to consider; reject as groundless (legal).

To stop ignoring, you need to stop relying on excuses.

Instead:

While you cannot change the aftermath of the pandemic, economic upheaval, or industry changes, if you stop ignoring issues, you can influence and impact how you lead your teams.

5 Tips to Stop Ignoring What Needs to Be Changed

  1. Hiring the Right Person, the First Time. When you ignore or overlook best hiring and selection practices, you will keep hiring the wrong type of person who fails. This costs you retention, revenues, and results each time! Example: One employer, each year, told a hiring consultant, ‘This year we had 40% turnover from firing or people leaving. So now we’ve got the right team.’ This was the same explanation each year for three years! The bottom line: nothing changes unless you stop ignoring how you hire and address the core issues!
  2. Resolving Team Conflict. Neglecting to care for the team and their relationships and resources will erupt into team conflict. Take the time now to resolve disagreements, personality differences, and differing points of view. Stop hoping and praying it’ll go away on its own because it won’t! Examples: 1) If it is a perception issue, use a qualified job fit assessment, which objectively shows people’s differences. 2) If it’s an issue with a process or system, brainstorm solutions by ensuring every voice is heard. Yes, they both take time! But it saves hours, days, weeks, months, and yes, sometimes years when you address the issue and stop ignoring it.
  3. Train Your Team. With companies watching their bottom lines, training is the first item slashed. This is very short-sighted. Make sure training skills are not ignored. Reinforce listening, asking questions, critical thinking, emotional intelligence, mindfulness, and project/system design, to name a few. Ignoring these essential skills will cost you!
  4. Develop Yourself. All successful leaders have a coach! (Yes, reread if you don’t already have one!) Unfortunately, many current and future leaders don’t see the need to hire a coach, practice daily ‘soft skill’ training, or behave as participants in workshops with team members. However, when you reject the training and ignore its benefits, you will lose credibility and the ability to influence anyone, anywhere.
  5. Impact of Your Decisions. Being an ostrich and putting your head in the sand will only cause you to ignore the impact of your decisions. Instead, collect and use objective, reliable, and valid data and avoid relying solely on your feelings or gut. Otherwise, if you don’t, the negative impact on customers, employees, work teams, finances, systems, etc. etc. etc. will cause leadership and career derailment!

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. As a result, they can work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about ignoring situations, relationships, and results: Many leaders need to stop ignoring things they can and should impact. They will lose out on leadership and career opportunities if they don’t. Contact me to discuss what you’re ignoring and how to make the necessary changes. It’ll impact your ability to influence results and keep your job!

This week’s PODCAST: Listen to How to Be an Effective Advocate and Be Heard with my guest, Jill Tietjen, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

NOTE: Do you have changes that need to be made but don’t know where to begin? I love coaching current and future leaders to support them in making important and strategic changes. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. It will accelerate your ability to influence others, coach your team for unprecedented results, and make changes that others applaud.

What Do You Need to Do for Your Team to Trust You?

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“Trust only happens when you say what you mean and mean what you say.” Jeannette Seibly

Only 40% of leaders and human resources experts say their company had high-quality leaders — a 17% drop from last year — with less than half saying they have confidence in their immediate supervisor, according to DDI’s recently released 2023 Global Leadership Forecast. (Forbes)

Being a leader with the right title does not make you trustworthy. On the contrary, trust is earned over and over, day after day.

Yet, today, we continue to see too many leaders in the media focused on themselves. They are unable to treat customers and employees as VIPs and dismiss important issues as not their problem.

“Team members that work for trusted leaders are far more innovative and achieve top-notch results.” Jeannette Seibly

How to Build Trust and Be an Effective Leader

Know Your Blind Spots. A blind spot is an area of weakness or limitation in an individual’s perspective or behavior that they are not aware of. When you are unaware of your blind spots, you’ll continue making the same mistakes and poor decisions. Teams and team members will stop trusting you, especially if you rely on using the same old excuses. Stop the vicious circle! Hire an executive coach and use a qualified job fit assessment to get real about why you do what you do! Make the necessary changes now.

Trust Your Team. First, you must trust your team members. It doesn’t mean you overlook half-truths, missed deadlines, or poor quality. It means if someone says they cannot get a task done by a specific time, listen and ask, “What do you need from me?” Teams that trust and feel supported by their leader are more likely to go beyond the norm to get the intended results.

Learn from Mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes, including you! Yelling or expressing frustration at team members is not the way to build trust! Instead, together, conduct an objective review of “what worked/what didn’t work?” Acknowledge things they did well. Specifically, focus on two things to improve. Then, take what you learned, develop a game plan, and manage for results.

Allow Them to Resolve Issues through Your Listening. Poor listening skills interfere with effective communication and relationships. They lead to misunderstandings and conflict, which diminishes trust. When you develop an ear to listen, your natural curiosity and good questions guide you on what to say. Allow your team member or team to get to the source of the problem through your listening! It builds trust that they can count on you because you are there for them.

Embrace Tough Conversations. If you’d rather avoid them, hoping and praying the issue (aka team member or customer) will disappear, your team stops trusting you! Your job is to make the workplace a safe and comfortable place to excel.

Be Known for Straight Talk. Say what you mean and mean what you say. (Yes, I’m repeating this … that’s how important it is.) This makes THE difference between your team trusting you to look out for them or feeling manipulated by you to get the job done. When making a promise, follow up and follow through. When a project has not met the customer’s needs, tell the truth about why. Stop the practice of making yourself look good at the expense of others. It’s the fastest way to lose trust!

Brag about Your Team! Sharing the successes of each and every team member makes a positive difference. This requires being aware of each team member’s contribution … no matter how small. By paying attention, you will build trust and strengthen their willingness to work with you!

©Jeannette Seibly 2020-2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has over 30 years of award-winning international experience as an executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients surpass the norm by working through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about building trust as a leader: Being a leader today is more challenging than ever! The biggest detractor is your team’s ability to trust you! Too many leaders focus on themselves. They are unable to treat customers and employees as VIPs and dismiss issues as not their problem. Contact me to discuss trust issues you have with your team and what they have with you!

This week’s PODCAST: Listen to “Best Practices When Working Remotely” with my guest, Ronald Beach, Ph.D., on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

NOTE: Do you want to win? All leaders who are winners have coaches! I love coaching leaders and have for over 30 years! Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Having a coach speeds up your ability to influence others, hire the right people, and coach your team for unprecedented results.

How to Test Your Hiring Process to Eliminate Costly Problems

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“To hire the best, you must consistently use best hiring practices!” Jeannette Seibly

Many job seekers love to share their stories about their horrible experiences when applying for jobs. Or, thankfully, share about losing out on a job due to the hiring boss’s poor interviewing behavior.

Stories hiring bosses love to share include nixing a person because they didn’t carry a pen to not hiring candidates that failed to answer non-job-related questions with responses they wanted to hear (e.g., most recent books read or movies seen).

As a hiring boss, you may not be aware of your biases. But they exist, many times unconsciously. And cost you time, money, and sleepless nights. (Example: Making your decision in 4 to 15 minutes of meeting people whether or not to hire them.)

Here’s a great way to determine if your company’s hiring and selection process needs help: use secret job seekers. (Similar to retailers using secret shoppers.)

How to do it: Secretly, without letting hiring bosses know, have friends, trusted employees, and business associates apply for open positions. Have them change their names on their resumes; use fictitious company names, job titles, and educational degrees; and provide pay-as-you-talk cell phones.

Most likely flaws you’ll uncover:

  • Difficulties using your ATS (applicant tracking system)
  • Inconsistencies of questions asked during interviews
  • Not using qualified job fit assessments (Note: Not all assessments are created equal and most do not comply with Department of Labor guidelines for pre-employment use).

The surprises (or maybe not … but now you have factual data required to make needed changes): you will discover the costly mischief about your company’s hiring practices and what is causing the company’s bad reputation.

Common issues will include:

  • Promises made during interviews and not kept when making job offers
  • Having too many interviewers or having team interviews with people not on the same page
  • Job descriptions are too long and uninspiring
  • Job postings are boring
  • Links and QR Codes don’t work
  • Inconsistencies when hiring managers conduct interviews (e.g., asking inappropriate questions or not asking the same structured questions of candidates for the same job)
  • Poor due diligence practices due to not thoroughly checking the backgrounds of all candidates

The key to fixing these issues is to design a strategic job fit selection process and use the best tools (e.g., ATS, structured interview formats, qualified job fit and core value assessments, and consistent due diligence practices). Note: Guidance on how to select the best tools can be found in Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues, and Results.

This is critical and often overlooked! Conduct training programs for all hiring bosses, and provide intra-company access to all required tools and procedures to ensure consistent hiring practices. Also, have a key executive hold all hiring bosses accountable for following all the policies and procedures in the spirit of hiring the right person for the right job the first time!

Training will reduce costly hiring problems and ensure the best hiring practices.

The results? When you implement this secret job seeker program, you will attract and hire better candidates that stop ghosting you! As a result, your company will thrive by increasing retention, revenues, and results. And you may become the best employer in 2023.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has over 30 years of award-winning international experience as an executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients surpass the norm by working through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about testing your hiring practices to eliminate costly (and avoidable) issues: It makes good business sense to ensure your company uses consistent, reliable, and valid hiring practices. Contact me to talk through hiring challenges and how to overcome them. It’ll save you time, money, and your customers!

This week’s PODCAST: Listen to Grow your side hustle into a full-time job with my guest, Bobby Crew on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

NOTE: Do you want to win? All leaders who are winners have coaches! I love coaching leaders and have for over 30 years! Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. When you have a coach, it’ll speeds up your ability to influence others, hire the right people, and coach your team for unprecedented results.

Become Present to Your Accomplishments

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“Being present to your accomplishments creates a natural confidence and ability to share your results.” Jeannette Seibly

You often forget about the tasks, situations, and interactions handled during the day. These activities go by without you being present to what you’ve accomplished!

Why is being present to your accomplishments important?

  • First, it impacts the quality of your work performance, job satisfaction, and ability to build credibility and influence others (to name a few).
  • Second, it also helps you be proactive in creating a career you enjoy and not just sitting around and waiting for something new to happen.

#1 Tip on Being Present

Be Focused. Stop Multi-tasking. When doing your work, set aside negative feelings about the task, stop replaying old conversations, and don’t allow other distractions (e.g., social media posts and electronic pings). When listening, stay focused on the current discussion.

5 Tips for How to Use These Accomplishments

  1. Quantify Performance. Keep track of your accomplishments and any outside-the-norm situations. Use metrics and facts to describe them. Examples: Saying, “It felt good to work with the customer.” It is not impressive. Saying, “Saved the customer $100 in fees.” It is very impressive.
  2. Keep Boss Informed. The boss does not know all you’ve accomplished and the value you’ve added to the company, client, or team. So share the highlights of your accomplishments during your 1:1 meetings or in short emails.
  3. Include with Your Performance Appraisals. If there is a self-assessment process, include vital stats on your performance appraisal. If not, have a 1-page description of accomplishments listed in a bullet format (20 words or less) and attach it to the performance appraisal.
  4. Brag to Win Promotions and Pay Increases. When pitching or negotiating for new opportunities, select 3 key accomplishments to share. To determine these, read the job posting and/or job description. Then, talk with others already working in that area.
  5. Share Ideas with Boss, Co-workers, and Customers. When sharing your ideas, include a key “brag” to build your credibility. For example, “When I used this approach last time, I saved 30 minutes.”

PS: When sharing your accomplishments (aka brags), even though you may be uncomfortable, be open to hearing others’ congrats! I promise you it’ll feel good.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. As a result, they can work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about being present to your accomplishments: You’ve achieved significant results in your work and life! So why is it important to be present and share? First, it builds confidence! Second, it’s a great way to build influence. Third, it improves your performance appraisal ratings and paychecks! Contact me if you’d like me to conduct the award-winning “Get Your Brag On!” for your team, company, or association meeting.

This week’s PODCAST: Listen to the Mastering Communication Skills with my guest, Meredith Bell, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

NOTE: I love coaching current and future leaders to support them in leading, managing, and hiring their teams. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. It will accelerate your ability to influence others, hire the right people, and coach your team for unprecedented results.

How Do You Bridge Communication Gaps and Create Positive Results?

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Leaders often wait for a miracle to get the team on the same page. Yet, unfortunately, it rarely happens without the directed effort of the leader.

In my recent article, Are Your Relationships Working? I mentioned “Bridge Communication Gaps” as one of the essential tips for building good and effective working relationships.

Yet, many leaders are perplexed about how to do this in today’s workplace due to diversity, remote work options, and differences of opinion.

5 Essential Ways to Bridge Communication Gaps between Teams and Results

Appreciate Differences … Where Do I Start? You start by using a qualified job fit assessment that provides objective information (not the type of assessment that shows how people want to be seen). For many years, I’ve used the granddaddy of objective job-fit assessment products: PXT Select. Example: When team members (and business partners, boss/employee) are in conflict, I use it to provide an objective review of what’s working and where the communication problems exist. Everyone thinks they know the answers. But 99% of the time, there are surprises. This process and the knowledge you gain build comradery and resolve misperceptions.

Get Everyone on the Same Page. Share the goal, budget, and deadline with the team and allow them to contribute their ideas, thoughts, and opinions. Yes, this often requires training for you and the team on developing and using the skills necessary to communicate, create strategies, and execute results.

Include Everyone’s Ideas. It doesn’t mean all of their ideas are viable and will be used. But when everyone’s ideas are heard and acknowledged, they feel respected and valued. This closes many communication gaps while building positive working relationships.

Brainstorm for Solutions. The same mindset that created the problem will not solve the issue. It requires listening outside the norm and allowing new, off-the-wall ideas to take hold. It will require setting aside egos and judging what is or is not a good idea. Encourage everyone to construct the solution by asking questions for clarification.

Celebrate the Wins and Learn from the Failures. This is critical and often overlooked. Conduct a What Worked?/What Didn’t Work? for each and every project. This review is also a great way to get unstuck in a project, acknowledge the team, and fully appreciate their efforts.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. As a result, they can work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about bridging communication gaps: For many leaders, this can be scary. They either don’t know how, are afraid to ask for help, or are unwilling to admit there is a problem. However, failure to bridge communication gaps will derail your ability to create good working relationships. It will also negatively impact your retention, revenues, and results. Contact me if you know you should but don’t want to. Don’t worry. You’ll glean at least one idea you can implement immediately.

This week’s PODCAST:  Listen to How the pandemic led a professional copywriter, speaker and author to become an accidental artist with my guest, Debra Jason, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

NOTE: I love coaching current and future leaders to support them in leading, managing, and hiring their teams. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. It will accelerate your ability to influence others, hire the right people, and coach your team for unprecedented results. SeibCo.com/contact/ 

Be Present When Listening

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“When you’re present during conversations, you become an influential leader because you heard what was being said.” Jeannette Seibly

If we want people to talk to us more, we should start by listening to them more. Simon Sinek

  • Would you like to achieve epic results?
  • Have working relationships with team members that develop them to be leaders?
  • Keep reading!

When we’re in meetings or conversations, and someone else is talking, we often allow ourselves to think of other things. The problem? We stop listening. We miss what the other person said. We also miss nuances that make a big difference in the person’s meaning, even if they didn’t say it.

In my recent article, Are Your Relationships Working?, I mentioned “Be Present” as a key to building relationships. I don’t know about you, but I don’t feel a positive affinity when someone is unable or unwilling to listen to what I have to say. Also, as an excellent listener, I am always amazed by others who fail to hear due to bad habits or an unwillingness to be present.

So, what are the critical tips for “being present” during conversations? How does being present impact retention (aka relationships), revenues, and results? Keep reading!

5 Key Tips to Be Present When Listening

Be Focused. When entirely focused on the person speaking, what you learn and hear, and the solutions that can evolve are incredible. It’s true. Just listening and setting aside internal mental chatter makes the person feel valued and respected (aka retention).

Stop Multi-tasking. When listening, set aside your work, negative feelings, and other distractions (e.g., social media posts, gadgets, email notifications). That will allow you to hear the genuine concerns you will otherwise miss (think, customer and employee satisfaction).

Stay Mentally Focused. Instead of allowing yourself to think of rebuttals or allowing yourself to be triggered by what they’ve said, be present and listen. Yes, I understand; this is easier said than done. However, successful leaders learn not to be offended and address issues at the appropriate time.

Set Aside Answers. Too often, when we listen, we listen to develop a solution or answer the person … even when they don’t ask a question! Instead, be present and listen. Don’t offer ideas. Listen to just listen. Be a facilitator and guide the person to brainstorm, allowing them to develop their own answers.

Ask Questions. When you are present, you can ask questions that ensure you understand what is being said. Being present and listening will allow you to inquire into gaps in their thinking or contradictions. Use facts, not feelings, when asking questions (feelings are fleeting and usually don’t reflect the speaker’s words spoken at that moment).

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. As a result, they can work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about being present when listening: It can be challenging to listen when someone is long-winded, or you have no interest in what s/he is saying. The problem? As a leader, not listening hurts your retention (aka relationships), revenues, and results. And being present and listening can make a big difference in what you hear. It allows you to reduce misinterpretations and hurt feelings. Contact me if you’re unclear about how to be present, especially when you don’t want to listen.

This week’s PODCAST: Listen to the Moments of Brilliance: You Don’t Have to Have the Answers! with my guest, Denise Roberts, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

When You Apologize, It Influences Results

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“A good leader is unafraid to apologize because it positively influences relationships, revenues, and results.” Jeannette Seibly

A note from Jeannette about apologizing: Remember, no relationship is perfect, and all will have upsets. As a leader, learn how to apologize genuinely… it’s an essential part of communicating effectively. Contact me if you’re unclear about how to apologize or if your recent apology only created more upset.

An employee met with her boss to resolve a critical distribution issue. Unfortunately, he didn’t come prepared and didn’t have the answers. She kept pressing him for the answers she needed. Instead of apologizing for not coming prepared, he left the meeting upset with her. Thirty days later, she left the company.

In my last article, Are Your Relationships Working?, I was surprised by the number of leaders (and others) that said they never apologize. To them, it’s a sign of weakness! They are wrong. Actually, apologizing shows strength and confidence in yourself as a leader. It positively influences your results, retention (aka relationships), and revenues! If you don’t know if you apologize when needed, ask your coach and mentor.

It’s not hard to apologize for your mistakes, misunderstandings, or the words you chose (e.g., profanity, mispronouncing someone’s name, misusing jargon, etc.).

But when leaders refuse to apologize, they don’t realize the mischief and hurt feelings they’ve created:

  • Resentment
  • Gossip
  • Avoidance behavior
  • Snarky remarks
  • Turnover
  • Profitability
  • Loss of customers, jobs, promotions, or pay increases
  • The list is endless!

Let me state this again … as a leader, you don’t have the luxury of not apologizing. It’s your responsibility to keep relationships positive with employees, co-workers, vendors, customers, and even your boss.

How to Make a Genuine Apology

Always start with honesty, courage, and respect, and extend the “olive branch.”

  1. Be present with what you said or the mistake you made. Please keep an open door so that team members can express their concerns. Set aside your ego and openly listen! Then, communicate immediately with your executive coach if you’re uncomfortable offering a genuine apology. Remember, the longer you wait, the more likely a mushroom-size issue becomes the size of a mountain with everyone taking sides!
  2. Offer “I’m sorry” or “I apologize.” Make it 1:1 or with the team (if appropriate). Otherwise, the elephant in the room will stop team members from listening and participating, negatively impacting your results.
  3. Listen to their response. If they are angry because you waited too long or you’ve humiliated them, listen and learn without rebuttal. Apologize once more after they’ve said what they needed to say. But don’t keep on apologizing if it’s not making a difference. Wait for cooler heads to prevail.
  4. Stop defending yourself. The situation happened. Being right or making them wrong won’t get the issue resolved and everyone back in focused action. Start with an apology. Share the goal or intended outcome. Ask if anyone has anything else to say. If they do, don’t defend or use excuses (e.g., “Yeah, but”). If they don’t, move on.
  5. Ask what you can do to resolve it. What needs to happen to move forward? Ask for their opinion and input. Then, wherever possible, use their idea(s) and follow through immediately. If you don’t, the resentment will continue to build.
  6. Forgiveness works magic. Genuine apologies allow you and them to let go of resentments. Then, true forgiveness is possible.

PS: Remember to forgive others who have offended you or made inappropriate comments.

Remember, all relationships have their upsets. As a leader, learn how to apologize genuinely… it’s an essential part of communicating effectively.

©Jeannette Seibly 2019-2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or a challenging relationship? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

This week’s PODCAST:

Listen to Do Whatever You Can to Serve Others with my guest, Deb Krier, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

Are Your Relationships Working?

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“We all have relationships that work and those that do not. The common denominator is you. What can you do to improve them?” Jeannette Seibly

All leaders know that the quality of their leadership depends on the quality of their relationships. Yet, many lack clarity on maintaining and improving these valuable sources of information, comradery, and partnerships. Leaders know good working relationships produce better results, more fun, and increased job satisfaction. (Yes, even for the introverts reading this.)

But in professional relationships, we all have blind spots. Yet few of us take advantage of learning what they are and how to overcome them because we think we already know what they are. Do you see the irony? So let me help you: You have no idea what your blind spots are. That’s why they are called blind spots … they are blind to you. But they get in the way of others having a good working relationship with you!

7 Essential Tips to Improve Your Relationships

  1. Be Present. This is one of the most important yet overlooked ways to improve relationships. When in conversation, be present. Set aside distractions and mental chatter. It tells others, “They matter.”
  2. Listen. Just listening without responding makes a significant difference in people feeling comfortable talking with you. However, believing it’s not worth your time to listen causes future problems. Remember, failure to listen to a team member takes a mushroom-size issue and makes it an immovable mountain! After listening, be curious and ask questions (e.g., “Tell me more.” “Why is this important?” “How can I help?”)
  3. Apologize. Yes, this is a difficult one for many leaders (think, ego.) When you’ve upset someone or failed to honor your word (think, excuses), it’s time to apologize. All you need to say is, “I apologize.” Then, change the bad habit or forgetfulness that caused the issue.
  4. Stop Being Annoyed. Yes, this is a hard one. But the following exercise does work. (I know because I’ve used it!) First, write down three to five things that annoy you. Now, stop allowing yourself to be annoyed when these happen!
  5. Forgive Others. Holding onto grudges and being offended only hurts you! Talk it out with one trusted ally to gain perspective. Then, forgive yourself for being human and know that not everyone will like you as their leader. But, as the leader, you are responsible for creating a workable relationship with each and every team member. (Not the other way around. So, get to it!)
  6. Hire a Coach. Yes, the right coach can help you work through those “sticky-stuck” situations and politically charged relationships. So hire the right coach today and get the year off to a great start!
  7. Bridge the Communication Gap. I’ve found this an easy way to get people on the same page and talking with one another. First, use a qualified job fit assessment tool that provides objective information (not the type of assessment that shows how you want to be seen). For many years, I’ve used the granddaddy of objective job-fit assessment products: PXT Select. Example: I received a letter from two clients that needed to bridge a growing communication gap. They said, “I thought I knew the person. Yet, I discovered the other person wasn’t who I thought he was.” Remember, these assumptions and trying to be someone you’re not will always get in the way of building solid and effective relationships.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or a challenging relationship? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about relationships that work: I observed a situation where a team member let another team member ‘have it.’ A third team member, watching the interaction, leaned over and whispered to me, “This is why I like doing things on my own and not being part of a group of people.” I’m sure this has happened to you. And maybe you’ve expressed the same sentiment. But the truth is, as a leader, you must work with and through others to build strong relationships. So address that complicated relationship now. Contact me to resolve it now before it gets worse because they usually do.

Listen to the Building Relationships in Your Business with my guest, Marsha Haygood, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.