Communication Styles that Hurt Leadership Effectiveness

“Good communication skills are required by everyone for a company, team, and project to achieve intended results.” Jeannette Seibly

Between 40% and 60% of conversational utterances are ego-related, focusing on our own feelings, opinions, and personal experiences. This self-centered conversational tendency is even more pronounced on social media, where some 80% of communication focuses on the self. (Wall Street Journal, January 2025)

The Problem: Poor communication is a widespread issue in workplaces today, worsening among leaders and bosses causes preventable conflicts.

Why This Matters: Leaders must listen, engage, and encourage employees. Otherwise, it will impede projects, budgets, timelines, quality, delivery, and other results.

Communication Styles That Cause Conflicts

Self-Interest Approach: Asking questions just to turn the conversation to oneself (aka BoomerAsking). (Wall Street Journal, January 2025).

Top-Down Approach: Dictating tasks without explaining “why” undervalues team members, stifles brainstorming, and leads to passive resistance.

• Passive Approach: Avoiding conflict and not asserting opinions leads to unresolved issues and perceived weak leadership.

• Aggressive Approach: Harsh, confrontational communication erodes trust and makes team members fear sharing ideas.

• Manipulative Approach: Deceit and fact-spinning create a toxic culture of mistrust.

• Inconsistent Approach: Frequently changing messages (aka relying on your feelings and indecisiveness) cause confusion and make leadership seem unreliable.

• Lack of Openness Approach: Unwillingness to listen to feedback and new ideas alienates team members and stifles innovation.

• Overly Technical Approach: Using complex language alienates non-experts and hinders understanding.

No one wants to believe that they are using these approaches. But take a moment and really look to see when, where, and why you engage in these bad habits.

How to Transform These Bad Habits

1. Hire an Executive Coach. Even if you need to pay for it yourself, it’s worth every dollar. Poor communication is why many bosses and leaders find themselves unemployed or sidelined. It’s avoidable with an executive coach.

2. Use a Qualified Job Fit Assessment. Understand “why” your thinking style, core behavioral traits, and occupational interests can get in the way of communicating effectively with others. This objective tool is priceless and helps you keep your job! And, when used as designed, can help you get promoted!

3. Develop Strong Meeting Leadership: Leading meetings effectively is crucial — on-site, remote, and hybrid. Work with your coach, take workshops, and watch videos to learn the nuances between mediocre and great meetings. Your communication style will determine the success of your teams’ results.

4. Become an Active Listener and Listen to and Give Constructive Feedback: Attend and participate in workshops, leadership coaching sessions, and other feedback programs. Don’t be afraid to provide quality feedback that makes a positive difference. It all requires good communication skills and an awareness of how you are perceived.

5. Develop Emotional Intelligence. Being mindful is key. Learn when and how to use humor, approach sensitive topics with empathy, and be willing to learn along with your team.

6. Pay Attention to Generational Differences. Older generations may use meetings to tout “this is the way it’s always been done,” making it difficult for newer employees to provide new ideas and solutions. Younger employees may rely too much on social media as “the way to get things done” and fail to understand “fake news” and “sensational podcasts designed to attract ‘Likes.’” It’s up to you to manage these interactions with communication finesse!

7. Train on Etiquette and Expectations: It starts with you! Become familiar with virtual conferencing systems and how to effectively communicate using them! Then, train your team members and others on how to get the most out of these meetings.

8. Be Coachable and Have a Willingness to Admit Mistakes: When you feel insecure about a situation or working relationship, you will tend to dominate the conversation instead of asking for help. Share your experience with brevity and admit when you don’t know something. (It’s a foundational skill required of great leaders.) Hold yourself accountable for implementing the feedback asap.

Good communication skills used during 1:1’s, team meetings, and other conversational moments can be beneficial to everyone … especially you! Remember, a good communication style will avoid conflict and will enhance your team’s cohesion and productivity while achieving great results!

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, boasts over 32 years of hands-on experience. Her expertise helps leaders and bosses refine their hiring, coaching, and management practices and achieve their intended results. Along the journey, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and numerous six-figure earners, all while championing those ready to elevate their game to new heights.

Prevent Poor Results: Proactively Address Bad Behavior

“Bad behaviors in the workplace need to be addressed before bigger issues are created.” Jeannette Seibly

As a boss/leader, it’s important to address bad behavior before it impacts or hurts results for the company, client, and team.

Waiting and hoping the issue(s) will resolve itself is not a proactive strategy.

This lack of initiative usually backfires and will escalate into a bigger workplace issue that now costs time and money. Even worse, top talent and clients start leaving. Note: This article is focused on a team member, not the entire team. Contact me for help to address bad team behavior.

Proactive Steps to Resolve Bad Behavior

Be Aware: Pay attention to all of your team members’ behaviors, such as being late, dismissive of others’ ideas, and causing conflicts with team members and others. Is this a one-time occurrence? (There may be nothing to do depending on the severity of the behavior.) Or has it happened more than once? (It’s time to address.)

Talk 1:1: Schedule a meeting to discuss your observations and include any feedback you’ve received from others. Be sure that the meeting is confidential (not in your office) and is free from interruptions.

Express Concern: Start the conversation by expressing genuine concern for the well-being of the individual.

o “I’ve noticed some changes in your behavior recently (be specific: arriving late to meetings, argumentative), and I’m concerned about you. Is everything okay?”

Use Open-Ended Questions: This encourages the person to share their concerns and feelings. Be sure not to judge or fall into the “Ain’t it awful” trap.

o “What’s been going on lately that is causing this behavior?”

Listening and Understanding: Actively listen without comments. Silence works wonders if the person doesn’t respond or appear to understand.

Provide Support by Identifying Needs: Never assume you know what needs to be done. Ask the team member for what type of help s/he needs. This could include counseling services, additional training, or adjustments to their workload. If there is an issue with the team leader or another team member, resolve it without embarrassing the person you’re talking with (e.g., hurtful comments, ideas not being heard). If their role on the team or in their job isn’t working, it may be time to use a job fit assessment to determine how to restructure their work responsibilities.

Set Clear Expectations. Use straight talk when outlining the expected behaviors and performance standards. Together with the team member, create an action plan with specific and achievable goals, along with deadlines.

o “Let’s discuss what’s expected in terms of behavior and performance so we can work towards improving the situation together.”

Follow-up and Monitoring. It’s up to you to check in and monitor progress while providing the support required. This is where many bosses/leaders fail to make a positive difference. Use the Sandwich or Direct approach depending on the person … make sure it is constructive. Note: If there are the same excuses each day/week, it’s time for a come-down-to-reality conversation and a revised plan of action.

o I’ve noticed positive changes in your behavior, and I appreciate your effort. Let’s continue working on the remaining areas.” OR
o It’s been several weeks and there hasn’t been notable progress. Let’s review the plan and see what changes we need to make.

Encourage Feedback from Others. Have an open door where team members can share their concerns. But don’t fall into the trap of agreeing with every nuance that occurs (e.g., perceived slights, concern about others sharing off-the-wall ideas) – people are human beings – and are not perfect. Focus on performance and not personalities.

o I’ve found this process to be extremely useful and eye-opening in bringing together a team and overcoming biases and judgments. Use a job fit assessment for all team members and contact me to conduct an effective team debrief.  Then, encourage each person to meet with another one to review the results. This process fosters open communication.

Appreciation Works. Remember to express your appreciation to each and every team member … this can make a big difference in modifying people’s behaviors.

o For additional training, use the “Get Your Brag On!” to guide employees to recognize their impact and successes.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 32 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 33 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette: It can be difficult to address bad behavior … most bosses/leaders ignore it and hope it will resolve itself. The problem? It rarely gets better on its own and usually costs lots of time and money. Even worse, you will lose top talent and clients the longer it’s not addressed. This week’s article provides a proactive approach to address the issue now. Contact me with any questions – we can address how to resolve what seems unresolvable.

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

How Do You Prevent Being Derailed as a Boss or Leader?

“Be open to knowing you don’t know everything – especially as a boss/leader.” Jeannette Seibly

While studies cite the lack of confidence and accountability as to why many bosses/leaders fail, too often, the culprit is that bosses/leaders are know-it-alls, and this attitude causes poor communication!

As a result, these bosses/leaders talk too much, alienate others due to poor listening skills, and miss hearing important information. How familiar does this sound regarding your experiences with a boss or as a boss?

The challenge is accepting that you don’t know everything and adjusting your attitude when people are talking. It starts with your communication style.

Communication Skills to Prevent Career Derailment

1. Adjust Your Expectations. When a team member, co-worker, or boss talks, listen! Adjust your usual listening from “I’ve heard this before” to “What can I learn?” – even when you’ve heard it before!

2. Be Aware of Your Actual Strengths and Weaknesses. Understanding yourself requires using a qualified job fit assessment. Otherwise, most assessment results will show how you want to be seen – but NOT how others see you (this is critical since people want to work with bosses/leaders they can trust)! Until you have this information, you may communicate in a manner that is not you – alienating others from listening to you. Work with an executive coach to address your communication blind spots.

3. Develop Your Business Acumen. It’s time to discuss numbers, results, and the bottom line. Be sure you’re talking facts by understanding what the numbers, results, and bottom line represent, not how you “feel” about them. Others stop listening if you use the word “I feel” too often.

4. Develop Emotional Intelligence (EI). Manage your emotions and develop compassion as you address people, technical, and financial challenges. You will develop confidence by listening more than talking and focusing on results instead of buying into the “it won’t work” mindset. Encourage everyone to talk through conflicts, difficult conversations, and factions, not avoid them.

5. Stay Informed and Open to Learning. This is a superpower! You must keep up with industry and professional trends and changes. Listening, reading, and asking questions is the best place to start. Then, have conversations with industry experts — you will make better decisions and speak knowledgeably when addressing competitive issues and leveraging data.

6. Empower Your Team Members. You can empower your team members through your listening and asking open-ended questions. This encourages them to bring solutions when there is a problem instead of relying on you for the answers.

7. Address Issues with your executive coach and industry mentor. Get the facts and do this before making decisions. Learn how to create win-win-win outcomes by listening more than talking and setting aside your ego: “I already know/did this.” Instead, ask, “What am I missing?”

8. Get Your Brag On! When done correctly, bragging builds confidence and the ability to influence others. Remember to develop your ability to use your brags to pitch, negotiate, and sell your ideas.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 32 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 33 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette: Many bosses/leaders today are unaware of how their communication style, poor listening habits, and being a know-it-all can hinder their success. Often, it causes career derailment. Need guidance to improve your communication as a boss/leader? Contact me.

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

How Well Do You Really Listen?

“It feels great to be heard.” Jeannette Seibly

Communication is a boss/leader’s superpower. It enhances their credibility, influence, and ability to achieve intended results.

Yet, many of you do a poor job of listening for various reasons.

Your excuses or reasons could include:

• “I don’t have time.”
• “I’ve heard this from others or the same person several times.”
• “I don’t care.”
• “If they would just do their job and stop making it more complicated than it is, we wouldn’t keep having these conversations.
• “I expect others to do their work and not make my job more difficult.”

While seeing these excuses in black and white can be off-putting, all bosses/leaders experience these feelings — some more often than others. But as a boss/leader, you don’t have the luxury of not listening! Failing to listen can and will come back to haunt you.

Remember, when employees feel heard, it increases their loyalty and trust in you as their boss/leader!

Let’s Dig Deeper into Why Employees Do Not Feel Heard

Instead of making needed changes, you make excuses. This could have been a great opportunity to build on a new idea by listening to the employee sharing the idea! Sometimes, all it takes is listening and not doing anything. The solution is asking open-ended questions and listening!

Recommendation: Ask them to create a written plan. Now, they feel heard. Review the plan! Offer suggestions for improvement. Then, do what is necessary to make the needed changes. PS: Don’t forget to acknowledge their efforts along the way!

You turn any problem or challenge around and blame the employee. “You need to stay focused on your own job.” (Or some variation of this.) Employees don’t feel heard and valued because you are defensive and take problems personally.
Recommendation: When an employee points out an issue, investigate. While it may not be a big problem, there is a good chance it will become one. What can you do to be proactive? This encourages employees to let you know when things are amiss, saving time, money, and your career.

You’ve not dealt with a recent failure, mistake, or personal setback. Grief is sneaky. It can shade your ability to listen to what an employee (boss or board) is really saying. You may overreact due to unaddressed feelings or denial; the employee feels you aren’t listening and overreacting to what they are saying.

Recommendation: Remember, your feelings come from within you; some conversations may trigger negative responses due to unresolved issues. Talk with your coach about how to handle these challenges. Talk with a grief counselor/therapist now to work through the emotions that will inevitably pop up!

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 32 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 33 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve the intended results.

Note from Jeannette: Are you a good listener? Many bosses/leaders would say, “It depends.” It’s important to listen – especially when you don’t want to do so. It will save time, money, and your career! Let’s talk now and address your communication concerns—before it’s too late. Contact me!

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

It’s Still Crucial to Develop Quality Human Interaction Skills

“Quality human interaction is a major reason companies succeed along with their newest technology.” Jeannette Seibly

Sadly, companies today are hiding behind their technology instead of training employees in basic customer service and communication skills.

Recently, a woman went to a major pharmacy for her annual vaccines. Although a sign stated, “Try This New Check-In,” she went to the counter to check in since no one else was in line.

Thirty minutes later, the woman is still waiting. The four other people waiting were being served first because they used the “New Check-In” QR Code. They were frustrated because there was a problem with their vaccine orders and told the pharmacist to allow the woman ahead of them to go first. The pharmacist and assistant ignored all of them.

When an older man arrived for his vaccines 40 minutes later, he went to the counter to check-in. The assistant insisted he sign in using the QR code. The problem was he had to return to his car to get his phone, causing an unnecessary inconvenience. This was poor customer service.

At this point, the woman spoke with the store manager. When the store manager apologized, the woman responded, “The biggest issue wasn’t the wait; it was the disrespect and lack of human interaction that was so frustrating. While technology is important, it should never overshadow the value of human interaction.”

Did you know that people will drive further to buy and pay more for identical or similar items when they can talk with a human rather than AI?

As bosses, you must develop all your team members to be responsible for good customer interactions and responsiveness.

Great Customer Service Requires Ongoing Training

Train for Basic Communication Skills. Too often, team members train their people in technology, finance, and mechanical operations. Unfortunately, they fail to include essential interpersonal (verbal and non-verbal communication), respect, and emotional intelligence skills. This has become a big issue since companies opt for technology-based customer interaction to save money. But does it really?

Many people today “talk” via “texts,” “emojis,” and other “social media posts.” They are at a loss to respond to people when situations require human interaction. Instead, they choose to say nothing or make inappropriate comments or gestures, worsening the problem and increasing the possibility of the customer never returning. Provide workshops, podcasts, and other training opportunities. Hold bosses and leaders accountable for using these skills, too.

Quality Work Means Doing Complete Work.  Hiding behind emails and texts and failing to do the quality of work required (e.g., minimum work, being late, and doing sloppy work) will have your customers looking at your competition! Apologizing for poor quality, promises not kept, and long wait times are essential. But relying on apologies instead of improving quality issues and time delivery problems is a critical mistake! Have weekly (or daily) meetings to keep your team updated with any changes. Expect them to work collaboratively and respond appropriately to different customer(s) situations.

Address Issues in Real Time. When a person is responsible for customer service and using technology, it can feel challenging to do their best job when someone is waiting, especially an impatient person. Team members will default to their natural way of talking with others (which can be problematic). This needs to be addressed immediately before others follow suit. One company lost a major national contract when allowing their service reps to make wildly inappropriate comments.

As bosses, we must train all our employees to be customer service-focused and ask, “How can I help you? Then, follow through.”

Update Training and Make It Ongoing. While training should include routine procedures, it must also address those exceptions that will pop up. Expecting everyone to learn and remember after one or several training sessions isn’t being responsible for ongoing training! People will forget about 50 percent after each session, especially if the boss and co-workers fail to use the skills appropriately. Poor training creates a poor reputation for the company. Provide certificates and other acknowledgments to reinforce the importance of good customer service results.

Remind team members that their customer service attitude will determine the quality of their day and enjoyment of their job.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 31 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 32 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette: Bosses, when you rely on AI and other technology to handle customer concerns, you’ll lose customers! Quality human interaction is still required, and so is developing all your employees to use these critical communication skills. You never know when an off-handed comment or gesture can cause a customer to fire you. Contact me.

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Get Your Brag On! (International Amazon Best-Seller)

Why is it important to self-promote and share your successes?  

Listen to this 15-minute interview and learn why.

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0B8voYqwPCooIA95zHmwSp?si=rfnEN6pjRa2ZWzttCpiTDA

YouTube: https://youtu.be/hoF1Obii7RQ

To grab the book, go to: https://SeibCo.com/books/

 

Career Success Requires You to Keep Moving Forward

“We look externally for reasons why we are unsuccessful or unhappy in our jobs. Instead, look inside ourselves, get into forward action, and play a bigger game.” Jeannette Seibly

Too often today, many people (including bosses and leaders) lament wanting to do something bigger, different, and more meaningful than they are currently doing. “I hate my job,” “I’d be happier if I made more money,” or “I’m destined for something greater” are common excuses.

They play small games to keep them on the payroll. They struggle to determine why they are dissatisfied with their job or career. They spend time gazing into a false future (“if only it wasn’t this way”), ignoring getting assignments done on time, doing sloppy work, or blowing off customer promises as unimportant.

Being resistant or resentful will keep you stuck because the same issues reappear as life lessons – even if you move on to the next job, career, or job opportunity. Remember, wherever you go, there you are (“The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension” 1984)

When you want to shuck it all (and there are times everyone does), stop. The same amount of time you spend hoping for different results would be better spent taking focused actions that move you forward to play a bigger game (e.g., upskilling, resolving failures and mistakes, and working out differences with difficult people).

And remember, hope is not a strategy.

Career Success Requires You to Stop Playing Small

Get your brag on!  When you experience feelings of being unworthy, lack confidence, or are overlooked for a well-deserved promotion, take the time to complete the five simple exercises in “Get Your Brag On!” This will build your self-confidence and provide guidance. Now — move forward by talking with your boss or the hiring manager who told you “No.” Playing a bigger game requires listening and then taking focused forward action by upskilling those technical, communication, and people skills.

Know thyself. You may believe you know yourself yet are unaware (or in denial) of your blind spots. Being inauthentic makes it difficult for others to work with you. You cannot transform a lie. Work with an experienced executive coach and use a job fit assessment to clarify who you are, not how you want to be seen. Playing a bigger game requires the process of getting real and using these newfound strengths appropriately.

Create real goals.  Real goals are simple and not camouflaged in a lot of words. (Remember, words matter.) Questions to ask yourself: “What lights me up?” and “What do I really really really want to achieve?” Remember, your goals are personal – stop trying to be someone other than who you are. Start today by taking focused actions to move forward. Playing a bigger game can be scary at first, but it gets easier the further forward you go.

Take consistent action. Yes, practice does create mastery. Take consistent actions daily by making the time instead of waiting until the time feels right. Playing to win requires creating new habits that work for you and your team.

Engage in critical thinking. CBS Sunday Morning (9/29/2024) featured students in Finland learning how to separate fake news (aka fiction) from facts. Remember, opinions do not equal facts! Critical thinking begins by telling the truth about the facts before deep diving into the core issue. Creating a bigger game requires working with the team to brainstorm solutions and discern what will work within budget, team, and people constraints.

Pull together a great team. Stop the do-it-yourself modality, “I can do it better,” and “I don’t have the time.” Your ego keeps you playing small. Hiring the right team members can and will make a big difference – often, they will do it better than you can while achieving the intended results. When you play a bigger game, you cannot do it yourself.

Develop good communication skills. You may believe you have good interpersonal skills and emotional intelligence. When you criticize others, blame them, or ignore their ideas, understand these are indicators you need help! Spend time hiring the right coach and finding the right mentor to ensure your communication skills and any blind spots (e.g., microaggressions, misinterpretations, and lack of honesty) are addressed in real time. Playing a bigger game requires improved communication and interpersonal skills.

Practice acknowledgment. It takes courage to move forward – remember, you can do it! Acknowledge your successes and appreciate your team members each and every day! This is critical when playing a bigger game and producing intended results.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 31 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 32 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette: We all experience times when we want to run away from our careers and falsely believe doing so will erase any unhappiness or job dissatisfaction. When you are unhappy, it’s a signal you are on track but need to play a bigger game (e.g., upskill your awareness, communication, and goals) to move forward. Yes, it takes courage to move forward – remember, you can do it! Need guidance? Contact me.

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Need a speaker for a company retreat or workshop? Want your audience to be energized and participating? Contact me!

The Secret to Creating Goals that ARE Achievable

“Teamwork requires working together to achieve better results while not ignoring issues.” Jeannette Seibly

We all have goals, dreams, and wishes for our careers and life. But too often, we fail to achieve them. We blame the economy, our bosses, and our family. We wait (and keep on waiting) until it’s no longer a viable goal.

What’s missing? Taking responsibility for how we create our goals. We allow our thoughts, ideas, and feelings to camouflage what we really really really want to accomplish.

7 Strategies for Achieving Your Real Goals

1. Ensure the Goal is Real. There are many guidelines for writing goals. Google them – Achievable, Measurable, Realistic, and With a By-When Date. Use this information to get you started.

2. Here’s the hard part: Goals should be ten words or less! I know, it seems impossible, but it isn’t. When you use too many words, the true goal will be camouflaged in vocabulary and will sabotage taking real actions. Shorten the goal to 10 words or less to be crystal clear and flat as a pancake.

3. Keep It Simple. When you become too wordy, you make the goal, dream, wish, or intention impossible to accomplish. We were all trained to be wordy (think of school when stating the simple fact wasn’t good enough … we had to write a paragraph or one-pager to get a good grade). Ask yourself, “What do I really really really want to accomplish?” For example, I want to get a job making six figures. However, the job must be remote, cannot require working more than 30 hours a week, and provide three weeks of vacation. This is no longer an actual goal. 

Instead, ask yourself what do you really really really want? The new goal: “Get a job making $125,000 annually by 12-31-2024.” This has become simple and doable.

4. Clarity and Discernment. Ensure your idea will work as designed by reviewing the numbers realistically. Will you break even, operate at a loss, or be profitable? It requires more than “feeling it” and “believing it.” For example, flipping homes involves knowledge about buying the home, the cost of repairs and labor, closing costs, and the length of time it’ll take to sell (aka flip). Goal: Sell a home for a 30 percent profit in 6 months.

5. Listen to Feedback! Before launching your idea, talk with a knowledgeable person. Ask open-ended questions. You are listening for: What is missing in my plan or idea? When ideas are not working, sometimes, it only takes a simple tweak, and they will work.

The biggest challenge? Your emotional attachment to your way of doing something can get in the way. Especially if you’ve been thinking and rethinking and overthinking the idea. Feedback will guide you through it if you listen.

6. Then, Review the Goal. Fine-tune. While you don’t want naysayers to upend your goal, reviewing and considering their input before moving forward is important. Example: I had someone tell me it would take 2 years before I could get the funding required to launch a program. I listened, asked questions, and made slight adjustments to my plan. Then, moved forward. I launched the program in 13 weeks, and it was profitable. Here was my goal: Launch a regional event for career advisors by xxx.

7. Remember, when you’ve hit a wall, or someone is blocking you, it’s time to hire a coach. We all have blind spots that get in the way. By working with an executive coach and taking a qualified job fit assessment, you can obtain real insight into what is getting in your way. (Note: qualified job fit assessments have incredibly high accuracy and reflect who we are – they are not focused on how we want to be seen – which often gets in the way of achieving our goals).

Examples:

  1. Wanting to be a salesperson without the willingness and ability to close a sale on a consistent basis will limit your tenure as a sales rep. Instead, if you want to be in sales and be successful, get honest about your abilities – get the training required – now seek a job in sales that fits you!

OR,

  1. You want to be a boss. But on truthful reflection, the real goal is making more money. Since you are unwilling to do the actual work required to be an effective boss/leader, find a position that accomplishes your financial desires.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 31 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 32 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette: We all have goals, desires, and dreams we wish to accomplish. What gets in our way is that we camouflage our goals with too many words to describe them. This makes it impossible to achieve them. This week’s article focuses on simplifying and clarifying your goal to achieve the intended results. Want help discovering and fine-tuning your actual goal?  Contact me.

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Are You Experiencing a Crisis in Confidence? Want to Come Back Stronger?

“Losing confidence in yourself means it’s time to review, re-engage, and come back stronger than before.” Jeannette Seibly

All bosses/leaders have experienced or will experience a crisis in confidence, self-doubt, or fear when working towards achieving a goal – the more significant and innovative the intended result – the more likely this will occur.

How can you tell if you’re experiencing a crisis in confidence?

You are:

  • Unable to make decisions
  • Making poor decisions by ignoring the facts
  • Concerned or fearful of what others will think, say, or do
  • Unable to sleep or fail to take good care of yourself
  • Not feeling comfortable with the changes being made
  • Unwilling to admit a mistake and take responsibility
  • Changing the goal (or intended result) to reflect current progress

When you face a challenging moment or experience doubt or uncertainty, it’s time to regain and revitalize your confidence. Remember, every boss/leader experiences these moments; it does not define your abilities or worth.

How to Regain Your Confidence

Acknowledge Your Feelings: Feeling uncertain or questioning yourself is okay. Recognize and accept these feelings instead of ignoring them. Contact your executive coach, industry mentor, or confidantes if it persists.

Reflect on Your Achievements: Take some time to review what you’ve accomplished in the past by completing the five easy exercises in “It’s Time to Brag!” A positive reflection on past successes reminds you of your capabilities.

Learn and Adapt: Learning from mistakes or setbacks is crucial. Complete “What Worked? / What Didn’t Work?” Then, with insight and renewed confidence, acknowledge the overlooked tasks and milestones or errors made when completing them.

Seek Advice and Support: Asking for help and talking with your executive coach, mentor, or one or two business professionals is wise. An outside perspective is often constructive and offers encouragement when you listen with an open mind and positive expectations and ask open-ended questions. Remember, the conversation will go faster, and your confidence will return quicker if you remain emotionally unattached to your point of view on how it “should” work.

Set Small, Achievable Tasks to Regain Momentum:

  • Adapt your strategies and approach based on what you’ve learned from the exercises and conversations listed above.
  • Create a “It’s Done List” (aka To-Do list).
  • Break the tasks into smaller, quickly accomplishable steps (e.g., getting a bank loan requires a P&L that is clean and up-to-date).
  • Schedule the completion of all of these items and take at least one focused action step now.

The natural confidence this process creates is priceless. But stay and keep in action – you’re not done until the intended result is accomplished.

Practice Self-Care: Ensure you care for your physical and mental health. Exercise, proper nutrition, and relaxation can all contribute to a more positive mindset while rebuilding confidence. Include journaling your brags and what you’re grateful for as part of a healthful ritual.

Stay Persistent: Confidence grows by experiencing and overcoming setbacks, frustrations, and failures. Keep moving forward, even if progress feels slow. Remember, the tortoise, not the racing rabbit, won the race!

When you embrace these steps and take the actions to overcome a crisis in confidence, you will return stronger than before. Don’t forget to acknowledge yourself for this achievement — and update your brags.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 31 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 32 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette:  Are you experiencing a crisis in confidence? Do you want to come back stronger? This week’s article is a must-read for bosses and leaders wishing to work through these inevitable crises and come out stronger than ever before. Need an objective perspective? Contact me.

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Transform Stress into Resilience

“Embrace stress as an opportunity for your resilience to shine through.” Jeannette Seibly

While many believe summer is a time to slow down and relax, the truth is, it’s been a hectic time … political rhetoric, economic uncertainty, workplace changes, and confusion about AI. Family and friend time can create additional frustrations. Your business projects, profitability (or lack thereof), clients, and teams have caused stress. Transforming your stress into resilience is required more than ever.

7 Ways to Transform Stress into Resilience

  1. Yes, it’s a #1 stress reducer. Breathe in for a count of 10, pause, then exhale for a count of 10. Do this at least three times. You’ll be amazed at how fast this works while creating resilience and improving results.
  2. Honor your inner leader. Too often, we attempt to ignore our inner wisdom to slow down. It’s time to listen, learn, and discuss it with your executive coach, mentor, and/or therapist. (Yes, mental health concerns are at an all-time high – there is no shame in reaching out for help – especially when doing so reduces stress, creates resilience, and produces better results.)
  3. Know thyself. Many times, especially today, people are in jobs where they do not fit their work responsibilities. In addition, the challenges of working with factions, sticky workplace issues, and complicated working relationships can make achieving the required results highly stressful. Take an objective qualified job fit assessment and work with your executive coach to determine your natural leadership skills and blind spots. The objective awareness of strengths and intrinsic weaknesses will develop resilience to issues you cannot control.
  4. Get the facts. Clarify the actual issue. Too often, we latch on to the smallest bits of information and run with it. This almost always creates a more significant problem (s). Talk out the facts with one or two trusted advisors and your executive coach. With a clearer perspective, get into action and resolve the issue now.
  5. Have the tough conversations you’ve been avoiding. Stress occurs when someone’s choice of words, discussion points, tone of voice, hand gestures, or facial expressions offend you. BREATHE. Remember, when stressed, you will overreact and misinterpret. Instead, have a conversation to learn the truth. If you don’t resolve it now, an irrevocable point will occur, preventing you from resolving the situation and saving the relationship.
  6. Keep a private journal. Use journaling as a way to create a positive future. Write down “brags” about what has been working. Include “I am grateful for …” Write about your future and goals. Take action on one of your goals – remember the smallest steps can create resilience, and the momentum will keep you moving forward.
  7. Be present with people. People know when you’re not listening. That creates stress for everyone. Then, to make it worse, you lie about it. It becomes a stress-filled interaction when others must repeat themselves. They become resentful. Instead, learn mindful resilience. I promise, listening will reduce stress and increase resilience, and your results will improve, too!

©Jeannette Seibly, 2019-2024

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 31 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 32 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette: It’s the end of summer, and you’re surprised by the amount of stress you’re feeling. You’re not alone. Here are some tips to alleviate it and develop resilience to move forward.  Contact me for help with addressing that nagging issue that won’t disappear.

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

Do You Want to Be a Great Leader? Start the Transition Process Now

“Great leaders prepare their successors to transition into their new roles ready for the challenge.” Jeannette Seibly

Learning to be a boss/leader is a process, not an event, and requires preparation! So does preparing your successor and preparing them for a smooth transition!

One of the lessons all bosses/leaders need to learn is when to step aside.

Too often, they wait too long. They allow their egos to get in the way and won’t let go. By the time they are experiencing mental health issues, physical disability, or death, it’s too late to have a prepared successor ready to take over.

The other challenge facing today’s leaders is that many potential future leaders are uncertain if they wish to become bosses/leaders. I suggest it’s due to a lack of preparation: training, development, coaching, and being given opportunities now to excel.

What Can You Do to Prepare?

Create Your Own Future. Too often, if you are hanging on too long, you don’t have a “What’s Next” planned. You will continue to talk about it, make excuses, create issues, and not take the focused action required to move on. Hire an executive coach and make a plan. Now, implement the plan.

Assess Who’s Next. When you have a key employee(s) designated to step up, they may not have the skills and talents to do so. Or they have been a great #2 person but are not the right person to become the #1 leader to move a business or team forward. While they may say they are interested, now’s the time to discover the truth. Create an individualized succession plan and use an objective job fit and leadership assessment. This is critical in determining job fit in the new role. Use the assessment to guide your conversations and listen for consistency in their responses. Ensure they are given the tools, resources, and coaching required to win.

Hire an Executive Coach Now. Hire an executive coach to guide the future successor.  Using an outside coach ensures any growth and development issues that might limit the future leader remain confidential. Remember, we all have our challenges. These should not restrict their ability to move forward if the person has done the work, is ready, and there are no ethical or other integrity issues in the way.

Select an Internal Mentor Now. The mentor’s role is to guide the future leader through industry, company, and professional changes. Many mentors don’t make great coaches due to the time required. The other consideration is confidentiality. Having a mentor as a coach can limit job transition or promotion opportunities due to the future leader going through a challenging work situation or difficult period in life. Again, if the person does the work, is ready, and has no ethical or other integrity issues, continue to move forward!

Invest in Training and Development. Have them attend programs to develop their interpersonal, emotional intelligence, managerial, and leadership skills. Ensure, along with their coach and mentor, these new skills and awareness are being used appropriately and effectively. Remember, as mentioned at the beginning of this article, learning to be a leader is a process, not an event – it takes time, being held accountable, and practicing the right skills.

Provide the Opportunities. Now is an excellent time to get them involved in company teams, critical client challenges, trade and professional associations, and other leadership opportunities. Remember, while you know you can do it faster (and better), you may have forgotten that it’s due to your long-time experience. Allow your successor to develop those experiences while you can provide the benefits of your knowledge and guidance.

What Do You Do When the Person Changes Their Mind? This is a great question that is often ignored. Have a conversation to learn why. Do not spend a lot of time attempting to talk the person into changing their mind. This rarely works out well for anyone.

©Jeannette Seibly 2024 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor/Leadership Results Coach with over 31 years of practical experience guiding leaders and bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing practices and produce amazing results! And yes, achieving business success always starts with having the right people in the right jobs! She has been an Authorized PXT Select® Partner for over 32 years. Contact Jeannette to learn more about these state-of-the-art job-fit assessment tools or how to coach and manage your people to achieve incredible results.

A note from Jeannette: As a boss/leader, do you have a successor? Great bosses/leaders spend time ensuring a smooth transition for when they are ready to move on due to promotion, job transition, or retirement. What is the best way to prepare a successor? How can you ensure a potential successor is ready? Why is it essential to create “What’s Next?” for yourself? Contact me for a confidential conversation!

Now is the time to get into focused action! Are there days you dread doing what is needed to manage your people, projects, and team’s financial performance? You’re not alone! Everyone has those days! But continuing to hide behind excuses only hurts you and your future promotability. I have extensive experience and wisdom guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams successfully – this includes getting you out of the way and working with and through people effectively to achieve the results required. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching programs.

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