Many leaders have not learned a very important skill … the art of negotiation. It’s a skill that must be developed to use with confidence and effectiveness.
Too often, people settle, assume, or avoid conversations altogether if they need to compromise or come up with win-win-win outcomes. This costs the leader, and their business, opportunities, money, and relationships.
True negotiation is not about winning at someone else’s expense. It’s about creating win-win-win outcomes where everyone benefits and the agreement builds trust, clarity, and long-term success. (Resource: Chapter 14, Get Your Brag On!)
“If you want to win, you need to support others winning too.” Jeannette Seibly
Basic Preparation for Effective Negotiation Is Required
Rule #1 – Prep Work
- Define clear goals and write them down.
- Identify three “Must-Have” outcomes—rank, circle, and keep them visible.
- Review your “brag” work and be aware of your metrics (e.g., results, wins, successes, accomplishments, and achievements).
Rule #2 – Research
- Learn the other party’s goals, challenges, and objections by asking them open-ended questions.
Rule #3 – Be Ready to Walk Away
- Know your bottom line and ensure ROI beyond the bottom line.
• Avoid clouding your judgment with emotional attachment to what they are offering. (Hint: It may sound good or amazing, but is it what you really really really want?)
Now, You’re Ready!
The Meeting
- Be present and mindful.
- Use agendas, take notes, and write down agreements immediately.
- Let them talk first; listen actively.
- Ask open-ended questions to uncover solutions and to clarify uncertainties.
- Allow silence (this is a skill you need to develop)
Don’t hedge and address issues directly.
- Seek common ground, restate agreements clearly. Write them down. (Remember, memories are faulty.)
- Stay flexible, avoid adversarial tactics.
- Review agreements at the end and don’t gloss over details.
Finalize Agreement
- Document terms, responsibilities, and timelines.
- Send the information asking them to include anything missing or needing clarification.
- Include an escape clause in the event things don’t work out as agreed on.
- Keep all notes organized for clarity and legal accuracy.
You can successfully negotiate your real priorities if you are willing to develop the skill to do so effectively … it requires a win-win-win mindset!
©Jeannette Seibly 2025-2026 All Rights Reserved
Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.
Do you have an issue you are struggling to resolve? Time to develop your negotiation skills. Let’s talk.