Results Matter

Emotions Are Data: Use Them to Lead with Clarity

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Leadership is not about having all the answers. It’s about creating an environment where others can contribute, grow, and thrive. Yet many legacy leaders struggle with the emotional side of leadership, viewing emotions as distractions or weaknesses, especially when triggered by an employee, team challenge, or high-stakes project.

In reality, emotions provide valuable data. When leaders learn to understood them and use them wisely, they provide insights that help strengthen relationships, make better decisions, and build a lasting leadership legacy.

The Role of Emotions in Legacy Leadership

Emotions reveal what matters most. They signal alignment, conflict, urgency, concern, and opportunity. When you learn to recognize and work with your emotions effectively, rather than react to them or deny them, you increase your effectiveness and influence.

Two concepts are particularly important:

  • Emotional Intelligence helps you recognize, understand, and manage emotions, both your own and those of others.
  • Emotional Integrity ensures you express emotions honestly while acting in alignment with your values and leadership commitments.

Together, these create the foundation for authentic leadership and sustainable results.

What Gets in the Way

Many leaders are never taught how to listen deeply, facilitate productive conversations, or help others discover solutions. As a result, emotional reactions can derail their effectiveness. Common examples include:

  • Talking, when listening would be more valuable
  • Making situations or decisions about their own opinions or perspectives
  • Showing up late, unprepared, or disorganized
  • Becoming defensive when challenged
  • Missing emotional cues that others are reluctant to express

These behaviors are not signs of failure. They are signals that greater self-awareness is needed.

A Four-Step Process to Discover the Gift Within Your Emotions

When emotions arise, especially frustration, discomfort, blame, or defensiveness, pause and use this process:

  1. Breathe. Create space between the trigger and your response.
  2. Thank. Recognize the emotion as information rather than a threat.
  3. Identify the Gift. Ask yourself: “What is this emotion trying to show or teach me?”

Then pause and listen.

Example, if you find yourself blaming others, the underlying issue may be uncertainty or your self-confidence has been shaken. Instead of being defensive, state your perspective in 15 words or fewer. Then allow others to agree, disagree, or suggest alternatives.

Then, ask open-ended questions and listen for what has been unsaid. The outcome of the conversation is usually beyond what you had imagined … in a good way!

  1. Adjust. Modify your tone, posture, communication style or approach based on the insight gained. Align your actions with your values and the leader you aspire to be.

The Legacy You Leave

Your emotions are not the problem. It’s how you do or don’t handle them. They may be pointing you toward the very lesson needed to become the leader others will remember and respect. Honor them and learn from them.

Remember, leaders are remembered less for their titles and more for how they made people feel, grow, and succeed. When you treat emotions as valuable data instead of obstacles, you strengthen trust, improve decision-making, and create a positive impact that lasts long after your role changes.

© Jeannette Seibly 2026. All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 34 years, she has empowered executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development.

When You Make Hiring Mistakes, It’s Very Costly!

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Can you relate to one or more of these stories?

  • A CEO knew within six months he’d hired the wrong person. Instead of addressing the issue, he built systems to work around the person’s poor job fit. Customers and top talent left.
  • A company rehired three previous employees who had left. Two of them were fired after a couple of months. The other is currently blaming customer service staff for loss of customers.
  • A company’s VP and CEO had been talking with a job candidate for six months. When they learned he was not a good fit for the manager job, they hired him anyway since they had already invested so much time. He was fired 60 days later.
  • A company thought it was ahead of the industry curve by relying on AI for hiring advice. The problem? AI cannot deep dive into concerns, and is not defensible in a court of law.

Every company likes to think they are doing the best they can. Their leaders tell themselves they’re doing everything right: interview questions, assessments, due diligence, and hiring teams. So why does it still go so very wrong?

Weak Selection Practices Let Candidates Control the Narrative

Interviewing Fails to Uncover the Truth

People are poor lie detectors. To determine who to interview, we rely on resumes (over 90% contain inaccuracies and are written by AI). Then, to make matters worse, we fail to ask job-related questions and probe for specifics. Many interviewers rely on intuition, body language, and other subjective methods that are influenced by bias and provide no defensible hiring data.

Candidates know this. They rehearse polished answers, mirror the interviewer’s values, and present stories that sound impressive but reveal little about actual performance. Without probing for specific actions, decisions, and results, interviewers miss exaggerations and false claims about accomplishments, leadership responsibilities, and contributions.

Inappropriate Assessments Fail to Verify Job Fit and Capability

Many companies rely on assessments that lack the validity and reliability required for selection decisions (hiring, job promotions, and job transitions). As a result, candidates can easily present themselves as more capable than they actually are.

Many candidates exaggerate technical expertise, leadership skills, or job-related experience. Others answer assessments based on what they believe the employer wants to hear. Without using validated and reliable assessments, job simulations, and skill verification, employers have no objective way to distinguish genuine capability from self-promotion.

Incomplete Due Diligence Fails to Confirm the Facts

Candidate dishonesty is one of the biggest reasons organizations hire the wrong people. Yet many employers fail to verify employment history, credentials, certifications, references, and reported accomplishments.

Candidates exploit these gaps. Some fabricate employers, degrees, certifications, or job titles. Others inflate accomplishments, conceal failures, and disguise job-hopping by rewriting their work history. Some simply overestimate their abilities and focus on getting the offer rather than determining whether the role is the right fit. When hiring managers become excited about a candidate and skip proper verification, misrepresentations often remain hidden until after the hiring decision has been made.

How Do These Hiring Mistakes Impact You as a business leader, entrepreneur, and boss?

  • Leaders feel duped. Bad hires create simmering resentment because leaders feel duped, misled, or forced to clean up messes they didn’t create. This upset and frustration often leaks into conversations, decisions, and team dynamics.
  • Employees no longer feel safe. They worry mistakes will be blamed on them or that leadership won’t protect them (psychological safety) when they feel uncomfortable with new team members failing to learn the company’s systems and practices.
  • Frustration and sleepless nights. Leaders lie awake replaying interviews, questioning their judgment, and worrying about how to fix the fallout. They fear letting the person go, especially if the person is well-liked but incompetent.
  • Loss of customers. Poor job fit shows up fast: missed deadlines, sloppy work, bad interactions, and broken promises. The new employee blames the company systems and products for customers leaving. But customers don’t care why it happened … they simply leave.
  • Broken systems and slow processes. When someone can’t do the job, everyone else compensates. Workarounds multiply. Processes slow down. Systems stop working as designed. Silos and factions get created and customers leave.
  • Loss of revenues, results, and retention. All bad hires drain money: rework, turnover, mediocrity, customer churn, stalled projects, and missed opportunities. Top talent leaves because they’re tired of carrying the load … and the blame.

How many times have you hired “the best person,” only to realize, shortly after they start the job, that you made another mistake?

Let’s Get Real

I’ve been saying this for more than 34 years: most companies are still hiring people who do not fit the job duties. This is due to the company’s poor hiring practices! It’s expensive to the company and demoralizing to great employees who are tired of carrying the load to cover up the mistakes.

How Do You Transform hiring, job promotion, and job transitioning practices into great selection decisions?

Create a structured strategic selection process. Hiring isn’t easy or fun. Work with an experienced talent advisor who has actually hired and fired people, and understands the cost of mistakes. Create a system and follow it! Once it starts working DON’T STOP!  A VP had great results making a new hire under the new hiring process; but quickly reverted back to her old ways (subjective hiring) with bad results, citing the new system took too much time. It hadn’t occurred to her that working with a bad employee actually cost significantly more time, money, customers, and good employees.

Conduct annual training for hiring bosses. Especially for leaders who hire infrequently or rely on social media “tips and tricks.” (“Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results!”) Now, hold all hiring bosses accountable for their hiring results.

Create job‑focused interview questions. Skip the cutesy questions which are indefensible (e.g., “Tell me about your favorite book or movie.” “What is your favorite animal or color.”) Use questions that uncover real job fit. Don’t be afraid to deep-dive into their responses to ascertain the level of skills they have for the job. (Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results! As one employment attorney said: “The cost of this book is worth the interview and reference checking questions!”)

Use qualified job‑fit and honesty/integrity assessments. Over 95% of assessments do not comply with Department of Labor guidelines for pre‑employment, job promotion, and job transitioning use. (Hire Amazing Employees, Ch. 9) Get real and use the right tool for incredible results!

Conduct real due diligence. Background checks, employment and education verifications, honesty/integrity assessments, and reference checks matter … especially now with so many people seeking jobs and using AI. (Hire Amazing Employees, Part 3, Ch. 16–17)

Job offer letters with due dates. If someone needs more than a couple of days to decide, move on. “I want to think about it” usually means they’re waiting for a counteroffer and those never work out well for the current and future employers. (Hire Amazing Employees, Ch. 18–19)

Onboard with intention. Most companies do this poorly; I’m not surprised when new top talent leaves. Create a 180‑Day Success Plan and follow it with all new hires, job promotions, and job transitions. (Hire Amazing Employees, Ch. 6 & 20)

Hiring, job promotions, and job transitions may sound easy. But getting the right person in the right job is not! As you move through Q4 and into 2027, commit to improving your selection process using real tools and best practices. It directly impacts your profitability and your credibility. Now, hold the hiring bosses accountable for their hiring results!

© Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 34 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Only Quit When You’re Clear as to Why

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Which one of these examples below have you experienced? If you’re like most people, you’ve experienced both.

Quitting Too Soon

Maria launched a client‑retention project with excitement and fresh ideas. But once the novelty faded and the repetitive (sometimes boring) work began, she felt stuck and invisible. One exhausting afternoon, she gave in to the urge to quit and stopped the project.

Two months later, leadership praised a nearly identical initiative completed by someone else. Maria realized she hadn’t quit because it was wrong; she quit because she was tired. The cost wasn’t just the project it was her credibility and missed opportunity.

Staying the Course

David led a cross‑department initiative that dragged on for months. The meetings were repetitive, progress slow, and the “newness” long gone. He felt the same urge to quit but instead, he paused, got coaching, and took one small step each week. He kept a visual reminder of the goal on his desk to stay grounded in the “why.”

Six months later, the project became a company model, and David was tapped to lead a strategic effort. His success didn’t come from constant momentum. It came from staying in action long enough to finish.

Many of us succumb when we’ve been doing the same thing for too long. We slip into a fog, hoping sleep will fix it. We feel the urge to quit and say, “Oh, well. It wasn’t meant to be.”

But remember: an urge to quit is a feeling; quitting is a decision. Feelings pass. Decisions have consequences.

We often forget the energy and excitement we had when the idea or project was new. As time moves on, the details we once ignored now feel heavy. The process becomes repetitive and boring. We get tired of doing the same thing day after day with no visible results.

Motivation spikes when something is new because dopamine rewards novelty, but long‑term achievement comes from the brain’s slower, steadier systems that support focus and persistence. This is when real progress happens through repetition and consistent action over time.

What Causes These Urges to Quit?

  • Being too hard on yourself. Unrealistic expectations drain motivation.
  • Repetitive processes. Monotony kills momentum.
  • The “newness” wears off.
  • Comparing yourself to others. Progress envy is real.
  • Emotional disengagement creeps in quietly.
  • Being uncoachable. Resisting feedback stalls growth.
  • Believing you already know the answers. Certainty often becomes a blind spot.
  • Wanting to hide or shut down. The couch and TV becomes a tempting escape.

Many times, you’re closer to the goal than you can imagine. It’s often the process or lack of coachability that gets in the way.

What Helps and Allows You to Refocus on “Why?”

  • Stop Pursuing the Forcing. Slow down. One step at a time. Sometimes self‑care (aka rest) is the fuel you need to continue.
  • Take a Break. A pause is not quitting. It’s recalibration.
  • Keep the goal visible. A picture on your mirror or a mental image keeps the “why” alive.
  • Decide what you can do right now. When rested, look at what’s next, what was overlooked, and what’s unnecessary or time‑consuming. (Use the “What Worked? / What Didn’t Work?” exercise found in Chapter 20, Get Your Brag On!)

When Should You Quit?

If it’s harming your physical or mental health, it’s time to stop. Health is non‑negotiable.

When Should You Decide?

  • Not today. Never decide when you’re in the “urge to quit” moment.
  • Name what you’re tired of. Clarity reduces overwhelm.
  • Get the coaching. Outside perspective breaks stuck patterns.
  • Take one small step. It’s not about immediate results, it’s about staying in action.

Your urge to quit is a feeling, which is not a reliable judge. It shows up in the middle of any long process and usually right after the “newness” fades.

If you decide to quit, do it when you’re clear it’s the right choice. Because once you quit, you may not be able to resume later … especially in roles where trust and consistency matter.

“You’re closer than you think. Stay in the game long enough to win it.” Jeannette Seibly

Leadership coaching and tools like PXT Select® help leaders separate the emotional urge to quit from a clear, grounded decision by providing perspective, accountability, and objective data about strengths and blind spots—supporting leaders to stay in action long enough to achieve the results that matter.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 34 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

 

Leaders, Are You Using Leadership Double-Talk?

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A major communication challenge many leaders face is relying on leadership double‑talk instead of speaking with strategic candor and tact with a backbone.

When leaders default to politeness to avoid accountability, their courtesy becomes a liability … and people stop listening. The line between diplomacy and double‑talk is razor thin, and when leaders use civility (surface‑level courtesy) to sidestep responsibility for what they say and do, trust and respect erode quickly.

Lack of awareness costs:

  • Revenues, retention, and results
  • Customers
  • Personal and professional reputation
  • Credibility
  • Trust (words and actions don’t match)

Teams and customers don’t want “nicer” leaders; they want leaders who use tact and diplomacy to tell the truth and avoid duplicity. People quickly lose trust when leaders say the right thing but choose to do what’s convenient for them.

Develop Diplomacy While Telling the Truth

Civility is a double‑edged sword in leadership. While it reduces friction and supports collaboration, it can also make leaders appear duplicitous. Teams and customers quickly sense gaps between words and actions. It’s essential to say what you mean and mean what you say.

Work with your executive coach and AI to develop a brief outline. Then practice in front of the mirror until the person looking back at you “can own what you’re saying.”

Have intentional conversations. Come prepared. Use diplomacy with honest intent and tact. Avoid polite language designed to avoid, misdirect, or self‑protect, especially during tough conversations or negotiations. These are moments when your words carry a lot of weight.

Say What Needs to Be Said

When surface politeness replaces direct communication, you’re in trouble. Your team and customers have stopped listening. Your credibility requires tact with a backbone … substance in what you say, belief in what you say, and actions that support it. Example, saying we value hiring the right people, but using assessments that don’t qualify for pre‑employment use.

Hold Yourself Accountable

Don’t hedge. Talk straight. Expecting others to take the blame for not understanding you creates frustration and confusion.

  • If you say you’ll do X, do it.
  • If you have a policy, follow it.
  • Don’t blame others when you’ve forgotten or decided you don’t want to follow through.

Preparation is important:

  • Use a quick outline for what you wish to say.
  • Review company policies and note what is required.
  • Take notes during meetings on ideas offered by others.
  • Write down what you promised to deliver.

Put Your Team’s Interests Above Your Own Comfort

Too often, leaders claim, “I didn’t feel like it,” or “I didn’t hear it that way.” Yet that moment can come back to haunt you for years. Gaslighting is another way leaders avoid accountability.

Example: When the president of a company asked the only female director a question, he then looked at the men for the answer. When she shared this with her boss, he told her she was overreacting instead of talking it through with her and creating effective ways to handle these types of situations in the future.

In Summary, Diplomatic Leadership with a Backbone Looks Like:

  • Direct communication delivered respectfully
  • Clear expectations paired with consistent follow‑through
  • Timely accountability conversations
  • Alignment between message, behavior, and decisions
  • Saying what you mean with no coded language, jargon, or vague niceties
  • Addressing issues early instead of talking around them
  • Checking alignment between words and actions by asking what the other person heard
  • Inviting honest dialogue and model it
  • Holding yourself accountable first

Tact with a backbone is when your diplomacy strengthens your leadership. You earn trust by being both respectful and direct. You become someone people can rely on to do what you say.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 34 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

When Leaders Create Self-Limiting Career Ceilings

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Legacy leaders rarely realize they’re the ones capping their own careers. Self-limiting career ceilings don’t appear overnight. They form through repeated behaviors and mindset habits:

  • Undermine colleagues, projects, and people
  • Avoid tough conversations
  • React emotionally to decisions or others’ conversations (e.g., easily offended)
  • Wait for permission to take initiative
  • Don’t ask for help
  • Fail to develop resourcefulness
  • Participate in factional and silo behaviors
  • Fail to manage reputation or abuse bragging rights
  • Think and act as the smartest person in the conversation
  • Gossip about someone they dislike
  • Become a leadership liability (e.g., lack of filter, inability to keep confidences)
  • Fail to rebuild trust after a political misstep, mistake, or project failure
  • Fail to lead and support people they don’t like
  • Experience high turnover due to poor hiring, job promoting, and job transitioning practices

Legacy leaders see these patterns early and take action to stop them before they become a self-limiting career ceiling.

While discrimination, ageism, and other biases do exist, the savvy business leader doesn’t blame politics, favoritism, timing, or “the wrong people” getting promoted. They get the help and insight needed to correct their leadership blind spots and create their next steps forward.

When these, or other limiting behaviors and mindsets occur, it’s time to recognize that you’re limiting your future before it’s too late.

Get Started Now

The longer you wait the harder it will be to transform poor leadership habits. Blind spots are the biggest contributors to self-limiting ceilings. An executive coach and a PXT Select® assessment reveal:

  • Derailers under stress
  • Reputation gaps
  • Behavioral and thinking patterns that limit advancement
  • Strengths you’re underutilizing
  • The ‘why’ behind your behaviors … and the ‘why’ behind others’ behaviors

Savvy legacy leaders use data, not emotion, to guide their growth. They take actions consistent with developing their leadership and learn how to work with and through others to achieve intended results.

Remember, your career ceiling is self-created and determined by how you behave when you feel overlooked or disappointed. Hiring an experienced executive coach fast-tracks opportunities for you to rise with professional maturity, discipline, and strategic leadership. While you may need to find a different employer to excel, you will be ready for the challenge due to the work you’ve done.

Now go get the help you need (yes, you will need help). And then, allow it to happen!

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 34 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

How Do You Bridge Communication Gaps and Create Positive Results?

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Leaders often wait for a miracle to get the team on the same page. Yet, unfortunately, it rarely happens without the directed effort of the leader.

In an article, Are Your Relationships Working? I mentioned “Bridge Communication Gaps” as one of the essential tips for building good and effective working relationships.

Yet, many leaders are perplexed about how to do this in today’s workplace due to diversity, remote work options, and differences of opinion.

5 Essential Ways to Bridge Communication Gaps between Teams and Results

Appreciate Differences … Where Do I Start? You start by using a qualified job fit assessment that provides objective information (not the type of assessment that shows how people want to be seen). For many years, I’ve used the granddaddy of objective job-fit assessment products: PXT Select.

Example: When team members (and business partners, boss/employee) are in conflict, I use it to provide an objective review of what’s working and where the communication problems exist. Everyone thinks they know the answers. But 99% of the time, there are surprises. This process and the knowledge you gain can build comradery and resolve misperceptions.   

Get Everyone on the Same Page. Share the goal, budget, and deadline with the team and allow them to contribute their ideas, thoughts, and opinions. Yes, this often requires training for you and the team on developing and using the skills necessary to communicate, create strategies, and execute results.

Include Everyone’s Ideas. It doesn’t mean all of their ideas are viable and will be used. But when everyone’s ideas are heard and acknowledged, they feel respected and valued. This closes many communication gaps while building positive working relationships.

Brainstorm for Solutions. The same mindset that created the problem will not solve the issue. It requires listening outside the norm and allowing new, off-the-wall ideas to take hold. It will require setting aside egos and judging what is or is not a good idea. Encourage everyone to construct the solution by asking questions for clarification.

Celebrate the Wins and Learn from the Failures. This is critical and often overlooked. Complete an exercise of What Worked? / What Didn’t Work? for each and every project. (For details, Get Your Brag On!, Chapter 20.) This  type of objective review is also a great way to get unstuck in a project, acknowledge the team, and fully appreciate their efforts.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 -2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 34 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

 

Stop Waiting to Figure It All Out Before You Begin

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Many legacy leaders stay stuck because they are trying to figure it all out before they take any action or move forward on a project or goal. They are waiting for clarity to avoid surprises or upsets in the event things don’t work out. And they are trying to avoid a similar mistake or failure that they’ve experienced in the past.

However, you can never figure everything out in advance because life, people, projects, and circumstances will always change.

Overthinking and analyzing becomes a stall tactic and are not effective strategies.

What Gets in the Way:

  • Fear of _____ (you fill in the blank)
  • Uncertainty of what will happen
  • Lack of confidence in your ability to handle changes
  • Obstacles that seem insurmountable
  • Overthinking or overanalyzing
  • Not forgiving yourself
  • Failing to learn from past mistakes or failures
  • Unable to adjust plan without changing the goal

5 Key Tips to Stop Waiting and Begin

  1. Embrace Uncertainty. Many legacy leaders do not have a good relationship with uncertainty. They feel that at age 55+ they should already have life handled and figured out. They believe that any uncertainty is their gut or intuition telling them not to do something. The truth is fear comes in many disguises that keeps you stuck and prevent you from moving forward. Journal your fears and concerns. Listen to podcasts. Now, “try out” something new and different.
  2. Shrink Your Focus to Today and Tomorrow. Big thinkers get themselves in trouble when getting started and even more trouble while staying in action. They overthink, make things too complicated, and fail to understand or address the details effectively. Progress happens when you focus on the small steps required today and tomorrow.

Example, you want to move to live closer to your adult children. However, you may have income, health, or employability challenges (e.g., type of work you will accept) that prevent you from making the move. Begin by working with a career coach, conducting effective networking, and having a resume that showcases your results (See Get Your Brag On! OR The Secret to Winning the Job: Start Bragging).

  1. Create Deliberate Intention. Deliberate intention is choosing what matters right now and acting on it. Too often, we get in our own way by overthinking and analyzing challenges that may never occur.
  • First, declare you will honor your commitment and intention to do so.
  • Second, create the goal and intention. (Remember, 10 words or less.)
  • Third, ask for help by building a team to support you.
  • Fourth, stay focused on the goal and actions required.
  • Fifth, celebrate each win. (Get Your Brag On!)
  • Finally, don’t forget to acknowledge the lessons learned.

Example, when a man was forced to quit his job due to health issues, it created a financial hardship. By asking for help, he was able to increase his income (pension, SS, and other benefits). But the problem was, his pie-in-the-sky mindset kept getting in his way of moving forward. He believed he had more money to spend than he did, and allowed his vision of what must happen to keep him stuck. By working with a financial coach, he was able to get his thinking in line with his income.

  1. Focus on One Area of Your Life at a Time. People often freeze because one part of their life lacks clarity or there are issues to resolve. They believe that if they can “fix” that one area, all the other areas will magically fall into place. It’s a comforting false belief. For example, refusing to take a great job opportunity because it pays less than you are currently making.

Only focus on one area at a time to resolve an issue (e.g., relationships, finances, or health). Solving the problem will create a new level of confidence to address other issues (e.g., career, projects, or personal goals). Attempting to take on more than one at a time will inevitability cause burn-out and stress and hurt the progress you made (e.g., relationship with your boss – resolving an issue about handing in assignments late requires you to now hand in your assignments on time).

  1. Make the right decision for you. You can only make decisions with accurate information available right now, not what you wish you had or what someone else experienced. This is where flexibility is important.
  • Make the best decision you can with what you currently know.
  • Adjust as needed new information emerges. Having a coach or committed listener can keep you from jumping on information that may have no bearing on your goal or simply be fake.
  • Don’t wait for perfect conditions; they don’t exist.
  • Progress relies on beginning and stay focused, not continuing to think about it.

Remember, change is inevitable and stagnation is optional.

Effective legacy leaders keep moving and don’t wait for perfect clarity before taking the first action. They know that forward motion creates momentum and clarity.

Remember,

  • You don’t need to figure it all out.
  • You need to begin, adjust, and continue as you take the small steps required.
  • Your confidence, competence, and ability will naturally strengthen as you move forward.

Consider hiring an executive coach to get you started and ensure you’re moving forward in a direction that supports your success.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Oops! I Made a Mistake. Now, How Do I Resolve It?

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Normally when bosses and leaders make mistakes, they blame others, have thoughts of retribution, or hide out. The problem? They fail to take responsibility and hold themselves accountable for fixing it.

When leaders fail to admit or own their mistakes, they often attempt to hide the mistake or talk over it. This ripple effect impacts the team, customers, and bottom line. Trust has been eroded and is usually difficult to regain.

Tips to Resolving Mistakes

Complete What Worked? / What Didn’t Work? This simple exercise will objectively clarify what happened when you use specific numbers and/or other metrics. When you complete the exercise, you will see what needs to be done to move forward. (See the full exercise, Get Your Brag On!)

Talk with Your Boss. Be in communication! The worst thing is having the boss learn about your mistake from others. Use the exercise above to clarify. Ask him/her for input and any other insights without being defensive.

Hire an Executive Coach. Many times, guilt or other emotions can get in the way of doing what’s best for the team, company, and client. Hiring an executive coach allows for confidential conversations. These sessions can guide you through the best way to resolve it. It also supports your self-esteem and self-worth after having made a mistake or experienced a failure, especially if others have warned you ahead of time.

Apologize. Apologizing is the hardest skill for most bosses and leaders to learn! We either ignore the need to do it, or overdo it! A simple “I’m sorry” works, whether it is to an individual or the team. Use the word “I” and don’t repeat yourself more than once!

Listen to the Feedback. Hearing what happened from others’ perspectives is important. It rebuilds trust if you’ve done the work required to correct the mistake. Remember, owning the mistake is important, and not allowing others to place the blame on the company, client, or economy … or each other! (It’s a short-lived feel good. But long-term, doesn’t resolve the mistake or failure.)

Listen for the Unsaid. Practice listening for the unsaid from your team members, customers, or boss … they may not realize they have the solution! Be careful because your ego may get in the way of your ability to truly listen.

Create a Recovery Plan. After acknowledging the mistake, outline the steps to resolve it. Identify the root cause, clarify responsibilities, set timelines, and follow up. This reinforces accountability and demonstrates leadership maturity. Always listen for feedback to avoid repeating the mistake or causing a different one!

©Jeannette Seibly 2024-2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

My Life Goal Is Not Happening! What Do I Do Now?

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I write a lot about fulfilling your goals and dreams in business and life. Yet, there are times, your life goal or desire just isn’t going to happen. Regardless of what you do, say, or think!

Sometimes goals don’t materialize because:

  • Timing has passed
  • Resources required are no longer available
  • Your skills or mindset don’t support the requirements for the new job position or opportunities
  • You’ve not taken the focused actions required
  • Financial or economic realities have changed
  • Your life circumstances have changed (e.g., health, energy, or priority-shift)

It may be time to pivot.

Two different examples … which one do you identify with?

#1. A 66-year-old man retired twice from the same job since he wasn’t happy sitting at home every day. The second time, he joined a men’s group, but the members didn’t offer him the energy and identity he loved (job title, interaction, and problem-solving). Based on what he said he enjoyed, I suggested he start a handyman service. But he had many reasons why not (some valid – liability for workmanship; others not valid – wanted flexibility). What he failed to understand was there are many ways to create a part-time small business and make it work. He’s still complaining about being bored.

#2. A 70-year-old woman had already accomplished a lot in her life. Yet, she had a big goal that seemed elusive, and she felt stuck. She was in action, but nothing was happening. After our conversation, she pivoted and released the old goal. Then, she found something better! Now, she’s enjoying working for a startup.

When you stop holding on to a dream or goal too tightly, other opportunities can be seen and heard.

And here’s the important part to consider: success changes as you change. What mattered at 30, 40 or 50 may not matter at 60 or 70. Today, success may look like quality of life, meaningful contribution, financial stability, and enjoying your time. It’s no longer about chasing outdated benchmarks or outdated success factors, or hanging on to an identity (e.g., job title) you’ve outgrown.

Remember, there are many new jobs and services becoming available for seniors, and others. Take advantage of them.

To Move Forward:

Forgive yourself. Write yourself a letter. Forgive that you didn’t achieve that elusive goal. Also, release the “identity” you created around it (e.g., job title, paycheck, ego, etc.). Now release it. Yes, it will pop back in your mind as you move forward. Just release it again. Remember, your ego loves to hold on to the past in the form of regrets. Acknowledge. Release asap!

Shed a few tears. Yes, you will experience regret and grief over a hope or desire you’ve hung on to for so many years. Releasing a long-time hoped-for identity is hard. Now’s the time to create what’s next.

Determine what’s possible.

  • What do you realistically need: financially, health-wise, personal fulfillment, family, etc.?
  • What is a realistic goal to achieve at least one of them?
  • What would be fun to do or have?
  • Where would you really like to live?

For example, if you wish to travel, buying a house or condo may not be the best investment for you given the upkeep, property taxes, and other required (escalating HOA) monthly payments.

Questions to ask yourself and journal (remember, writing engages your brain differently than using electronics to answer these questions):

  • What would be the best goal or desire for me to pursue? (Set aside your ego!)
  • Where can I live and easily pay my expenses each month?
  • What can I do part-time to ensure I’m having fun and doing things I enjoy?
  • What groups or other activities could I participate in?

Get the support required. In story #2 above, her husband paid for my executive coaching services to help his wife clarify what was realistic. Afterwards, she became easier to live with, and happier too.

Now, do the work. Remember, small steps forward with focused actions! Time to get in action!

**Below is a gift: “Move Forward” Game Plan (Fun Edition) to get you focused. Have fun!

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

**Your “Move Forward” Game Plan (Fun Edition)

  1. Name the dream you’re releasing

Pick one goal you’ve quietly carried for years. The one that’s no longer aligned with your life, energy, or priorities. Give it a name. Something humorous or symbolic. Then retire it quietly and confidently.

“My Great Leadership Fantasy is now officially retired.”

This clears emotional space for what’s next.

  1. Define your new success markers

Three simple categories (or pick ones that resonant with you and don’t overthink them):

  • Ease — What makes my life smoother?
  • Joy — What reliably lifts my spirit?
  • Impact — What feels meaningful to me right now?

These become your new scorecard.

  1. Choose one lifestyle pivot based on what you “really really really want to do” and stop putting it off.

Based on your new focus pick just one. Something that aligns with your current reality and desires.

Examples:

  • Write a memoir for your family or a children’s book
  • Move to a different living environment
  • Shift the type of clients you pursue and your work hours
  • Designate more travel days
  • Choose fun projects, not “stress-filled” ones
  1. Create your “small steps” ladder

Five tiny actions that move you forward. Not big leaps, just daily micro‑moves.

For example:

  • One conversation
  • One email
  • One exploration (e.g., craft store, talk with a tennis pro – the list is endless)
  • One financial check-in (e.g., work with a financial planner, list out your expenses and income)
  • One joyful activity (e.g., walking, day-trip)

Set up a structure to keep you moving forward. Remember, small steps are your superpower and create your momentum.

  1. Add one delight to your week

A walk, a new coffee shop, a conversation, a class, a trip, a hobby.

This keeps your energy buoyant and your creativity alive.

  1. Celebrate your pivot

You’ve done a lot of hard work over the years. Celebrate with writing out and celebrating your brags! You’ll be amazed by what you’ve accomplished … and it feels good too. You can also use this to share your legacy with your family.

You’ve now designed your next chapter to be lighter, clearer, and more aligned. Mark the shift with a dinner, a toast, a note to yourself, or a new journal/notebook. Remember, make this time real and fun. But don’t be afraid to pivot as you move forward and discover new opportunities and interests.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

How to Hear What is Not Being Spoken

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Every leader has had to learn how to listen beyond the words being said. And with so many team members working from home today, it’s more important than ever to listen more closely.

Being able to develop the skill of hearing or sensing what is not being said or spoken is important for current and future leaders. As leaders, it’s important to have intentional conversations, listen with attention, and ask open‑ended questions to dive deeper. Developing these skills will fine-tune your ability to hear the unsaid.

Virtual meetings provide an opportunity to hide out. It’s harder to recognize and pick up on the 80 percent of non-verbal communication cues. And when you miss what’s unsaid, you risk missing deadlines, making wrong assumptions, and encountering costly rework.

Question: Have you ever talked with someone and you (and they) believed you were both on the same page? However, two weeks later you find out you were both not on the same page. That’s the gap between what was said and what was actually heard. And why it’s critical to for you to tune-up your listening!

  • Some people tell you what they think you want to hear.
  • Different people learn differently: without appropriate auditory or visual cues, they lose part of the conversation.
  • You’re using jargon or words that are not readily understood.
  • You’re rephrasing words they used instead of using the same words they used (e.g., calling someone upset when they believe they are only frustrated – different words have different meanings to people).

7 Tips to Hear What Is Not Being Said

  1. Yes. Especially if what they say has triggered you.
  2. Set aside any distractions. Listening is an art … and doing it well is a requirement for all leaders. Multi-tasking as a productive way to manage your time is a myth.
  3. Quiet the mind. Set aside any internal mental chatter and emotional reactions — that literally creates a blank slate. Otherwise, all your biases, judgments, and other POVs will get in the way.
  4. Ask open-ended questions without sounding like an interrogator when something doesn’t add up or sound right. (Remember, you could be wrong.)
  5. Pay attention to your internal antenna. For me, when my imaginary antenna starts waving, I trust it. I wait, and if the antenna is still waving, I asked open-ended questions. This allows me to “hear” or get to the true core issue or solution.

For example:

  • “Interesting. You said XYZ, now you’re saying ABC. What is the difference?”
  • At first, they will deny the discrepancy.
  • Keep your tone even‑keeled. “Interesting, I’m not clear how that works—what can you show me to help explain this?” (Diagrams and pictures can make a positive difference.)
  1. Ask them to repeat back what they heard you say and how they will proceed. Some people are great at repeating what was said without comprehending what it means. This requires patience since they are not used to sharing what they heard.
  2. Practice daily. Spend one minute after each conversation asking yourself: What did I hear? What didn’t I hear? What felt off? This simple reflection builds your “hearing the unsaid” muscle quicker.

Remember, you are not a mind‑reader … although you may like to think you are. When you are able to hear what is not being expressed, and needs to be said, it can make a huge difference in achieving the required results.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.