Management

What to Do When Team Members Fail to Tell the Truth

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(This is part two of a two-part article. Here’s the link for Part 1: https://seibco.com/telling-the-truth/

Team members lie for a variety of reasons. As a leader and boss, it’s crucial you learn how to address and handle situations and relationships where team members (and others) have lied, stretched the truth, or relied on innuendos.

It starts with hiring people who can tell the truth, admit their mistakes, and take responsibility for what they say and do. If you lack a strategic job fit selection process, you will be constantly on guard in conversations, and it will leak into your ability to work well with others too.

Why employees may feel the need to lie:

  • Lying is easier to handle than any fear
  • Fear losing their job, paycheck, or other work assignment
  • Are coping with anxiety and other stress-related issues
  • Avoiding responsibility for the harm and impact on others in the moment
  • Identity and habit (e.g., they were the go-to person – now they are not due to job changes)
  • The damage is already done and nothing bad has happened (yet)

What Can You Do to Protect Yourself, Your Team, and Your Company?

Listen to learn. Proactive protection requires being diligent in conversations and actually listening. This requires no multi-tasking, putting aside any electronic devices or other detractors, and focusing your attention on the speaker.

Ask open-ended questions. Use the Rule of 3 to deep dive into the facts to ensure you know and they know what is being said is the truth. Always use this approach when fact-finding or relying on data presented (e.g., negotiations).

Prep and document. Conduct research before conversations, not during (no multitasking). Write down what is said. Why write? Many studies have shown that writing uses the brain differently. You are more likely to question certain comments or statements. Example: “This is very interesting … can you tell me specifically where you got this data? How did you go about it? What did you learn?”

Encourage them to tell you the truth. “This may be difficult, but I need to know the actual facts of what happened.”

Power of Discernment. This is a skill you develop daily. Don’t be afraid to have the tough conversations by talking straight. (Example, if a company policy has been violated, be clear about what must happen next. And, follow through.)

Emotional Intelligence (EI). Being aware of your own EI helps develop an awareness and mindfulness to decipher when others are telling the truth or camouflaging facts. But, remember, lies, half-truths, and innuendos are an easy trap to fall into when people are in a hurry. Slow down since operating on false information will cost you top talent, key customers, and a positive bottom line.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Being able to discern truth from lies can be hard for everyone. When in doubt, ask for help from a qualified coach or therapist. Give me a call.

Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway:  https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q

Sometimes to Win You Need to Quit

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There are times you can win simply by quitting. It’s not losing. It’s not something most bosses or coaches will tell you. It’s what must happen to move forward.

While I don’t advocate giving up too soon, there are times when the game plan, mindset, or actions just are not going to get you where you need to go. And, change is not going to happen in a timely manner.

How to recognize when to quit:

  • You’ve talked to your coach and mentor, and they each said, “We cannot help you.”
  • You took a job knowing it was not the right one for you.
  • You joined a team that is poorly run, and sabotages your input (and energy).
  • The list is endless.

It is time to reassess when:

  • There’s been a financial drain.
  • Your health is at risk.
  • Resources are unavailable.
  • You are unwilling to have the needed conversations.
  • No one is willing to work with you on the project.
  • You’re unwilling to hire a coach and incorporate their ideas. (Then, it’s doubly time to quit!)

What Happens When You Hang on Too Long:

Feel bad. Feelings can and do change very quickly. Regretting hanging on too long rarely makes a difference to your team, investors, boss or customers.

Give up at with first problem. You give up too quickly because it’s not working out as you had envisioned.

Lack commitment to the goal. Momentum and inspiration will come and go depending on the work you’re willing to do.

Trying to leap when you should be taking smaller steps. Remember, the fable, The Tortoise and The Hare. Hares, slow down. Or, if you’ve been operating as a tortoise out of fear of failure, speed it up!

Relying on your inner dialogue. This will stop you when you only focus on what’s wrong!

Before You Quit!

Get clear. Work with an experienced coach. Every failure (and success) can provide “lessons learned.” If you don’t take the time now, it will show up again!

Complete What Worked / What Didn’t Work? Be objective to determine what you missed, ignored, or failed to do correctly. Use your numbers objectively. (Instead of, people were happy at the event; use objectivity – 20 people showed and 1 person requested a future conversation.) Talk with your coach to determine if these insights can rectify the plan, or if it’s time to scrap it as it is currently designed. (See Chapter 20, Get Your Brag On! for exercise)

Review your inner dialogue. It’s time to get real … not reinforcing “why it should’ve, could’ve and would’ve worked if only things, situations, and people had been different.”

Wobbly inner power. Too often, you’ve made yourself wrong, disempowered yourself (and others), or allowed someone to diminish or dismiss your project as important. Stop! Talk with your coach or therapist to get back on track before making a final decision to quit or proceed forward.

Be coachable.  Too often, people will give up too quickly due a myopic view of how it “should” look. After talking with your executive coach to determine if the project, plan or venture can be turned around profitably and fulfill the intended outcomes, it’s time to make the final decision. Realize a “decision not to make a decision” is a decision … and often a “No!”

If you’ve done the reflection, and are unwilling to modify your thoughts, feelings, and actions, it may be time to quit and move on. Do so gracefully. Remember, you didn’t lose. It just didn’t work. Now look for what’s next!

©Jeannette L. Seibly, 2012 -2026

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

There are times when life will throw you curve balls. If your commitment isn’t strong enough, it’s up to you to get into action with an experience coach. Then, make a decision to move forward or quit. Contact me.

Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway:  https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q

As a Leader, Do You Have Difficulty Telling the Truth?

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(This is part one of a two-part article.)

Many leaders are confronted when needing to tell an uncomfortable truth. They fear people will become upset with them when it isn’t what they want to hear. And these leaders lack the self-confidence and self-esteem to work through upsets with bosses, customers, employees and teams.

This is especially true for leaders wanting and needing to be “liked,” versus doing the right things the right way (e.g., failing to: follow policy, hire strategically, address bad behavior and poor work quality).

Why is it so hard?

They …

  • Rely on false information and believe what they are saying.
  • Have an automatic reaction when caught falsifying data, stealing, or ignoring policy.
  • Lack having done the research or talking with the right people.
  • Have an emotional attachment to the person or situation.

The inevitable outcomes are two-fold:

  1. When others find out you lied, you cannot be fully trusted again.
  2. If others relied on your information or data, they will question your ability to be a leader and refuse to work with you.

While leaders gain very little by stretching or ignoring the truth, it doesn’t stop many from doing it anyway and calling them “harmless little white lies.”

Remember, the truth will normally surface and what you gained by lying (stretching the truth) is short lived and costly for your leadership, career, and relationships.

Short-term benefits that are erased later:

  • Avoiding consequences — escaping blame, punishment, or discomfort for the moment.
  • Controlling a narrative — shaping how others see you, creating a false image.
  • Buying time — delaying a difficult conversation or decision.
  • Protecting ego — shielding yourself from shame, embarrassment, or vulnerability.
  • Manipulating outcomes — influencing others to get what you
  • Habitual lying — lying is a default coping mechanism.
  • Shame cycles — shame leads to lying, lying leads to more shame.
  • Avoidance patterns — some people would rather face a future crisis than a present discomfort.
  • Identity protection — they’re protecting the version of themselves they want others to see.

These gains feel real in the moment, but it’s like building a house on quick sand. It will eventually sink … then what?

Why do leaders and bosses continue lying when they know the truth will come out?

Chronic lying is less about deception and more about emotional survival strategies. Leaders lie when they don’t believe they can handle the consequences of the truth — or that others will fail to see they did the best they could.

In other words, people don’t lie because it’s smart. They lie because it’s easier than facing something painful right now or their ego isn’t ready to be vulnerable about mistakes.

Your short-term gain is not worth your long-term loss:

  • Trust — once broken, it’s incredibly hard to rebuild and people don’t forget.
  • Credibility — people doubt the truth you are telling and this will limit opportunities.
  • Relationships — lying corrodes intimacy, respect, and psychological safety.
  • Self-respect — living in contradiction wears a person down, lowers self-confidence and self-esteem.
  • Peace of mind — keeping lies straight is exhausting and usually will be uncovered by powerful listeners and fact-finders.

When the truth finally comes out, and it will, the short-term benefits rarely justify the long-term damage.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Telling the truth can be hard … especially if you don’t know what it is! Learn the power of discernment by improving your leadership skills now. Give me a call.

Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway:  https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q

Be an Action Leader and Produce Intended Results

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Leaders (and so many other people) consider themselves thought leaders. They overthink an idea, talk about how things should be, criticize those in action, and offer skepticisms as sage advice about change.

This includes taking safe actions such as creating a petition – that rarely produces positive results. Or feeding your fears by attending networking meetings but won’t meet 1:1 with others. Or talking about system changes without understanding the true issues.

Real action is required to produce intended results.

Being an action leader who produces the intended results requires getting out of your own way. (Note: Anyone and everyone can be an action leader … it’s not based on job title, paycheck, or other subjective factors. It’s based on your willingness to be a leader who takes actions.)

What do we allow to get in the way?

  • Overthinking
  • Procrastination
  • Fear of making mistakes and lack of forgiveness for past mistakes
  • Emotional attachments to the past
  • Inability to see the impact of the change
  • Inconsistent actions that don’t align with the goal
  • Relying on self-talk for the answer

What are the costs to you and your legacy?

  • Top talent – they want to work for an action leader (not talker)
  • Retention – constant change due to shiny object syndrome (inconsistent thinking)
  • Revenues – not crunching true numbers for cost v. benefit
  • Results – activity without focused actions
  • Customers – no credibility
  • Trusting yourself – self-respect, self-esteem, and self-confidence is lost

Two examples where future action leaders failed to take the right steps forward …

First Example: A woman wanted to be the team leader, a top spot on a coveted project. But the boss insisted he needed someone with different credentials. So, the woman talked with many people to get agreement that she was the right person. The problem? The woman failed to take the actions required to transform her blind spots required to be a potential team leader for the project (e.g., hire an executive coach, use a qualified job-fit assessment, and do the real work).

Second example: A man had the potential of becoming a professional speaker. After speaking twice in front of small groups, he decided he was bored (they were bored too). He told everyone that he wanted something more. The problem? Unless or until you actually do the work of speaking in front of groups numerous times (small, large, paid, and unpaid), and learning from your successes and failures, you will not achieve your intended result. Hint: It’s the speaker’s job to engage the audience … this can be learned and developed through training and coaching. Also, this is true when learning to lead projects, handle customer issues, or have tough conversations with employees and co-workers.

Action Steps for Action Leaders

  • Clarify goal and intention.
    • Write down your thoughts!
    • Reduce wordiness (10 words or less).
    • What is the intention of the goal? (The Why)
    • Create a game plan (draft).
  • Hire a coach. Make sure the coach is the right one. Do they have the experience and proven results? Can they move you forward when you become stuck due to fear or external factors.
  • Talk with others about the goal and listen. Having conversations with yourself is useless and will severely damage your ability to achieve intended results.
    • Include and value others’ ideas
    • Acknowledge self-doubt and hear others’ concerns
    • Focus on creating win-win-win outcomes
    • Flexibility is required about how to achieve your goal and intention
    • Listen with an open mind and ask open ended questions
  • Build a team. DIY is old school. Big results require a full robust team. Which means … listening to their input. Brainstorming. Learning excellent facilitation skills. Ensuring the goal and intention are shared at the beginning of each (Yes, people will forget, make it more complicated, or create their own version.) Now, finalize the game plan and go for it!
  • Manage for results, not personalities. Remember, you and your team will zig and zag since there is never a straight line to the intended result. You are accountable and responsible for moving people forward and keeping people unstuck. (For further insight, read: “How to Work with an Incompetent Boss)
  • Celebrate and appreciate. Yes, each and every small and larger victory. Update your brags!

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Being an action leader isn’t hard … but does require taking specific actions and not just talking about it.  Contact me for a confidential conversation to ensure you’re moving forward. 

Work Well with Anyone, Anywhere at Any Time

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Successful business relationships do not happen overnight. They are created from mutual respect, trust, and experience. The focus is developing win/win/win outcomes that make a positive difference.

Developing the Leadership Skills Required to Work Well with Anyone

  1. Do what you say you’ll do, when you say you’ll do it.
  2. Apologize when you “drop the ball” and keep your word in the future.
  3. Take an interest in the company, people, products, financials, safety, community of others where you work.
  4. Be informed about the interests and concerns of your coworkers, boss, and team. Be able to interact appropriately.
  5. Show respect everyone on the team regardless of their opinions and personalities.
  6. Stop judging people by their manner of dress, background (e.g., education, work experience), or title in a company.
  7. Make it a habit to say “Please” & “Thank You.”
  8. Keep confidences. Don’t talk negatively about other people (aka gossiping).
  9. Level up your listening by setting aside your need to form comments or opinions while others are talking.
  10. Be comfortable with silence.
  11. Ask open-ended questions.
  12. Pay attention, nonverbal gestures and actions speak much louder than your words (80+ percent).
  13. Always, consider other people’s ideas and concerns when developing solutions.
  14. When talking or writing, use KISS: Keep Ideas Simple & Smart

©Jeannette Seibly 2010-2026

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

It’s always challenging to work with so many different personalities and expectations. Developing yourself as an effective leader requires the know-how to work with anyone, anywhere at any time. Contact me for a guide on how to work well with everyone.

 

Let’s Honor Our Commitments and Create Our Legacies

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Too many times, we allow our commitments to get pushed aside. However, at age 55+, time is running out! It’s now or never to create and fulfill our legacies.

Let’s make the commitment to get off the proverbial fence and take those small steps required to move forward and achieve amazing results. The natural inner power and satisfaction that occurs is priceless.

Steps to Forward and Honor Your Legacy

  1. Create a goal and intention. Get real about your true goal and keep it to 10 words or less. The intention is critical because it is your “why.” WRITE them down! Studies have shown that writing engages the brain differently and opens up your creativity and awareness.
  2. Put together a game plan. If the goal is to move to a new apartment or buy a home, write it down on paper! Include the three must‑haves (e.g., A/C, hardwood floors, and new roof), along with the step‑by‑step process.

Example … Many years ago, I sold a home where I had focused my attention and money on the structural concerns (e.g., plumbing, new roof and gutters, tree removal, etc.). I did not have money for “interior design.” When a young couple saw my home and compared it with a home that had all the visual bells and whistles, they bought the other home. Then, they had a flooded basement and wanted to know if they could switch it for my home. Be clear what you want and need upfront and don’t get caught up in the “shiny red object.”

  1. Include budgets or projected “real” costs. These are critical and often overlooked due to the enthusiasm of something new (e.g., What is the projected cost for utilities? If buying, have an independent inspection done … what are the costs to resolve issues found?) Write them down!
  2. Create momentum and results. Take small steps forward so you don’t become overwhelmed emotionally, physically, or mentally. It may require getting the paper and boxes for packing (staying with the “buy or rent” example in #2). A day or two later, sorting what to take with you, what to give away, what to sell, and what to throw away/shred. Be rigorous so unwanted items don’t move with you.
  3. Plan to hit the wall … yes, this IS inevitable. This usually happens when you rely on only one source during the process. Set aside your emotional attachment and select three alternatives. Again, using the original example in #2 … one mortgage company may say you don’t make enough money, while another may say you need extra $$ for mortgage insurance, while the third will charge you a higher interest rate. Do the math, then, pick one after reading the fine-print. Remember, not now is also a valid choice, and making “no decision” is also a choice or decision. (True life example: One family overpaid for a condo, because they had the money to do so. They were excited about their new home. As required, they signed an agreement to not smoke or vape on the property, but ignored it. The fines were steep!)
  4. Celebrate your victories … small and large. Get your brag on!

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

There are times when your commitments aren’t strong enough to move you forward and you stay stuck. What is one thing you can do to get back in action? How can I support you and clarify your goal and needed actions? Contact me.

Are You a Critical Leader?

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Effective leadership style produces intended team results on a regular basis.

Do you:

  • Find fault with other’s ideas and actions?
  • Believe your way is the only right way?
  • Blame mistakes on others?

Being a critical leader or boss can be tiring for both you and your team members. Your attitude and behavior make it difficult to work with you and nearly impossible to learn from you. Until you transform your critical mindset, you will never have a team that produces intended results on a regular basis.

How do you transform your critical mindset to lead an effective team?

Look for opportunities to praise.  Acknowledge others for a job well done, even if it’s a small step or contribution. Consider ideas that may initially seem off-the-wall or inappropriate, and acknowledge contributions in a positive manner.  Your openness will encourage everyone to stretch their thinking and behavior to improve their skills.

Learn from mistakes.  Every mistake can be turned into a learning moment. It’s important to understand the difference between a Zero Tolerance Policy for unacceptable behaviors versus reviewing and learning from mistakes. You and your team inevitably will make mistakes during a new task and new project, or working with new clients. Ensure your systems are up-to-date, and all your employees have the training needed to minimize errors at repetitive tasks. Develop a repeatable process when creating and executing new opportunities to ensure employees are aligned.

Make 2-2-2 your paradigm. Acknowledge two positive things they have done well. Then, share very specific areas for improvement, no more than two. Wrap-up with two positives they have done well. This makes feedback easier to give, and receive! (See Direct Approach vs. Sandwich Approach)

Hire a coach. It’s important for your own career and leadership development that you learn to effectively work with and through people to get the job done. An effective leadership style produces win/wins on a regular basis.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2010 -2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

All leaders need a periodic “checkup” on their effectiveness as a leader. Learn how to improve and produce intended results. Give me a call.

Time to Honor Our Commitments and Stop Fence-Sitting

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Fence‑sitting drains your energy … and those splinters can be painful. And the real exhaustion comes from postponing your goal or dream … and your legacy feels that.

It’s a #1 problem! We all love and hate fence‑sitting … the waiting for the stars to align, our boss or family to give permission, or to have enough time or money. The truth is … perfectionism, ego, and judging others are the real culprits that get in the way of achieving our goals. These fears keep us trapped on the fence feeling comfortable.

Making a commitment to honor our goals and taking actions can be invigorating.

You may be thinking, “Well … I did take action … but …”

  1. The Remy Effect. I have a 13‑pound ginger cat who loves to meet others in the hallway – including dogs. But when a person comes into our home, he runs and hides. Many of you behave in a similar fashion. You’re fearless until you allow fear to dominate you.
  2. Facts versus false information. Yes, there is a lot of false information out there. The challenge is it’s often more comfortable to believe the falsehood and deny the truth. (Example: hiring assessments … many will claim the assessment they are using is validated for pre‑employment and selection use, when in fact, it is not.)
  3. Failure to do ‘complete’ work. Doing just enough will keep you from enjoying the intended results of your legacy. Or you do too much without asking for help! There is a sweet spot for doing what needs to be done without driving yourself crazy and annoying others.

Example: I talked with a successful consultant who had bought books from friends who wanted to become published authors. “The problem,” he lamented, “is that most of these books are poorly written, lack proper editing, and use pictures, layouts, and covers that leave a lot to be desired.” Hiring a book coach would have created a much better legacy!

What’s missing that keeps us on the fence and hold us back?

  1. Awareness of Job Fit. Some people become wealthy by doing the work required in their nicely paid, but not overpaid, job. While others keep attempting to take on careers they believe will make them wealthy faster. Their job or career pursuits are misaligned with their natural interests, thinking styles, and core behaviors. Hire the right coach, take a qualified job‑fit assessment, and write your own resume (AI doesn’t know the difference between truth and fiction)!
  2. Using Your Ingenuity. I continue to be impressed by the ingenuity of people. Some people are rockstars … while others could be rockstars if they stopped trying to mimic others. This is key … we have emotional attachments to mimicking others, often to our own detriment. Get clear. Get real. Get in focused action.
  3. Doing the Work Required. Many people love the idea of sharing their opinions, but not doing the real work required for results. For example: They start a podcast believing they will make a lot of money, only to realize it was another shiny object that distracted them. Learn the art of skill-stacking.

Your legacy demands commitment. Commitment requires action. Your resilience is what keeps you moving forward! Take the actions that will move you off that seemingly comfortable proverbial fence and enjoy your results.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

It’s time to honor your commitment and stop fence-sitting. Learn how to seize the time now to take actions that support your legacy and goals.  Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Negotiation Skills Are Required for Win-Win-Win Outcomes

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Many leaders have not learned a very important skill … the art of negotiation. It’s a skill that must be developed to use with confidence and effectiveness.

Too often, people settle, assume, or avoid conversations altogether if they need to compromise or come up with win-win-win outcomes. This costs the leader, and their business, opportunities, money, and relationships.

True negotiation is not about winning at someone else’s expense. It’s about creating win-win-win outcomes where everyone benefits and the agreement builds trust, clarity, and long-term success. (Resource: Chapter 14, Get Your Brag On!)

“If you want to win, you need to support others winning too.” Jeannette Seibly

Basic Preparation for Effective Negotiation Is Required

Rule #1 – Prep Work

  • Define clear goals and write them down.
  • Identify three “Must-Have” outcomes—rank, circle, and keep them visible.
  • Review your “brag” work and be aware of your metrics (e.g., results, wins, successes, accomplishments, and achievements).

Rule #2 – Research

  • Learn the other party’s goals, challenges, and objections by asking them open-ended questions.

Rule #3 – Be Ready to Walk Away

  • Know your bottom line and ensure ROI beyond the bottom line.
    • Avoid clouding your judgment with emotional attachment to what they are offering. (Hint: It may sound good or amazing, but is it what you really really really want?)

Now, You’re Ready!

 The Meeting

  • Be present and mindful.
  • Use agendas, take notes, and write down agreements immediately.
  • Let them talk first; listen actively.
  • Ask open-ended questions to uncover solutions and to clarify uncertainties.
  • Allow silence (this is a skill you need to develop)

Don’t hedge and address issues directly.

  • Seek common ground, restate agreements clearly. Write them down. (Remember, memories are faulty.)
  • Stay flexible, avoid adversarial tactics.
  • Review agreements at the end and don’t gloss over details.

 Finalize Agreement

  • Document terms, responsibilities, and timelines.
  • Send the information asking them to include anything missing or needing clarification.
  • Include an escape clause in the event things don’t work out as agreed on.
  • Keep all notes organized for clarity and legal accuracy.

You can successfully negotiate your real priorities if you are willing to develop the skill to do so effectively … it requires a win-win-win mindset!

©Jeannette Seibly 2025-2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

Do you have an issue you are struggling to resolve? Time to develop your negotiation skills. Let’s talk.

Turning Resistance into Resilience Achieves Results

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Most 55+ leaders have been fighting resistance for many years due (e.g., teams, peers, bosses, customers … the list goes on and on).

Some leaders take it personally, while others resort to intimidation or outtalking others. But intimidation and outtalking others do not turn resistance into getting the job done well.

People resist when they feel uncertain, uncomfortable, or imposed on.

When these types of situations occur, use them as signs you may need to strengthen your persuasive communication, trust building, and adaptability to new ideas. It’s time to become resilient and turn others’ resistance into “I can do it.”

Moving Past Others’ Resistance

Build Trust. It starts with hiring right! If you don’t hire for job fit – team members who aren’t interested in the task will delay getting the work done. Be resilient as a leader by assigning the work to the people who enjoy it, or at least will get it done right. While employees (and others) need to feel seen, heard, and valued (these build trust), they also need to be equipped with the resources to get the job done … and that’s your job (another trust builder).

Share Intended Results. Dictating, micromanaging, or using microaggressions only intimidate people. It does not reduce their resistance … they just learn to hide from you. Instead, ask open-ended questions and listen. “I have an assignment that needs to be done by tomorrow. Do you have time to get it done?” Then, use a Rule of 3 to ensure they truly have the interest and willingness to do so. Sharing results and the positive difference they can make is important for employees to feel valued.

Adapt Your Persuasive Style.  Adapting your ability to persuade others is important since many people are a “no” or “I guess I can.” This leaves you wondering if the job will be done well, if at all. Your job as a resilient leader is to provide reinforcement or support in getting an assignment done. If support is needed, offer by providing focused training and development. Trusted employees can surprise you by doing a better job than you!

Accept a “No” and Identify the Source of the Pushback. If a team member says they don’t have time to do it, learn why. Or, move on to the next person. Many times, the project may initially seem overwhelming and no one wants to look incompetent. This will occur if you have not taken the time to outline specifically what you need to have done and the desired results. If you are seen as someone who jumps from fire to fire, or idea to idea, slow down. The tortoise won the race, not the hare.

Give Them a Voice. Provide the goal and how you see it happening. Be open to their input and ideas and incorporate these whenever possible for a win-win-win outcome. Agree on a deadline. (Example, allow time to review a power point and make adjustments). Remember, when you’re giving ownership to a task or project, it reduces resistance along with providing positive reinforcement. Again, don’t micromanage.

The next time you are faced with team member resistance, channel it or embrace it with your leadership resilience.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Being resilient in the face of team member’s resistance is part of being a leader. Learn how to transform your team members from a “no” to a “yes.” Contact me for a confidential conversation.