Have you ever noticed that the leaders you respect are also the ones that don’t hesitate to apologize? “I’m sorry …” “Oops, my misunderstanding …” They take full responsibility for what they hear and what they say. Understanding the secrets of a powerful apology and developing this all-important skill is required of everyone in any leadership role.
Since we are not mind readers and cannot control how someone listens, taking the time to clarify what others hear will reduce misunderstandings and conflicts. It requires learning the art of an apology to move everyone onto the same page, encourage everyone to share their ideas, and keep minds from straying when conflicts of opinions arise. Powerful authentic apologies also develop a positive work environment, trust and job satisfaction.
The Three Secrets
Honesty. When people always believe they are right, they can be difficult to work with. However, allowing your ego to get in the way of having a beneficial conversation often causes further misunderstandings and trouble. Apologize for not understanding and share the prep work you completed that may provide a different perspective. Take a step back and be emotionally unattached to the outcome during the conversation. Truly listen to build win-win results using persuasive listening skills. To learn these skills, contact Jeannette.
Respect. When others don’t apologize for their lack of preparation or late arrivals, we often feel disrespected. Many times they have armed themselves with a variety of excuses to elicit sympathy. Respect for others requires that you stop making excuses and simply apologize. Remember, your excuses will fall on deaf ears and are considered inauthentic. Respect for yourself and your team requires taking a stand. First apologize for how others may interpret what you about to say; then, say it. For example, “I apologize upfront if someone doesn’t hear this as I intend. However, it’s important that everyone arrive at all meetings prepared and ready to go at the scheduled time. Any questions? “
Courage. Admitting a mistake or taking responsibility for a poorly completed assignment takes courage. First, apologize. Then, ask questions. The questions are not to defend what was done or not done. They are to clarify what you missed in the conversation and what was overlooked. Remember, 80% of any interaction is non-verbal; so, stay focused during these discussions and set aside any mental chatter that will distract you from truly listening and resolving the problem.
©Jeannette Seibly, 2017
What are you waiting for? In 10 days, Q1 will come to an end! The good news is there is still time to create a great 2017. The bad news is it’s not going to happen unless you take action, now! Contact Jeannette Seibly. She will provide you the insight required for you to move forward powerfully! The clock is ticking …
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Jeannette Seibly has been a business advisor and executive coach for 24 years; along the way she’s guided the creation of three millionaires. She is laser sharp at identifying the leverage points that will take a business and its team to the next level of performance and success. She also has extensive experience getting everyone on the same page! Check out her website , or contact Jeannette for a free, confidential conversation. Remember to get your copy of her 5th and newest book, It’s Time to Brag! Business Edition.