(This is part two of a two-part article. Here’s the link for Part 1: https://seibco.com/telling-the-truth/
Team members lie for a variety of reasons. As a leader and boss, it’s crucial you learn how to address and handle situations and relationships where team members (and others) have lied, stretched the truth, or relied on innuendos.
It starts with hiring people who can tell the truth, admit their mistakes, and take responsibility for what they say and do. If you lack a strategic job fit selection process, you will be constantly on guard in conversations, and it will leak into your ability to work well with others too.
Why employees may feel the need to lie:
- Lying is easier to handle than any fear
- Fear losing their job, paycheck, or other work assignment
- Are coping with anxiety and other stress-related issues
- Avoiding responsibility for the harm and impact on others in the moment
- Identity and habit (e.g., they were the go-to person – now they are not due to job changes)
- The damage is already done and nothing bad has happened (yet)
What Can You Do to Protect Yourself, Your Team, and Your Company?
Listen to learn. Proactive protection requires being diligent in conversations and actually listening. This requires no multi-tasking, putting aside any electronic devices or other detractors, and focusing your attention on the speaker.
Ask open-ended questions. Use the Rule of 3 to deep dive into the facts to ensure you know and they know what is being said is the truth. Always use this approach when fact-finding or relying on data presented (e.g., negotiations).
Prep and document. Conduct research before conversations, not during (no multitasking). Write down what is said. Why write? Many studies have shown that writing uses the brain differently. You are more likely to question certain comments or statements. Example: “This is very interesting … can you tell me specifically where you got this data? How did you go about it? What did you learn?”
Encourage them to tell you the truth. “This may be difficult, but I need to know the actual facts of what happened.”
Power of Discernment. This is a skill you develop daily. Don’t be afraid to have the tough conversations by talking straight. (Example, if a company policy has been violated, be clear about what must happen next. And, follow through.)
Emotional Intelligence (EI). Being aware of your own EI helps develop an awareness and mindfulness to decipher when others are telling the truth or camouflaging facts. But, remember, lies, half-truths, and innuendos are an easy trap to fall into when people are in a hurry. Slow down since operating on false information will cost you top talent, key customers, and a positive bottom line.
©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved
Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.
Being able to discern truth from lies can be hard for everyone. When in doubt, ask for help from a qualified coach or therapist. Give me a call.
Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway: https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q