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5 Attitudes Required to Fast Track Career Success

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There are many conversations business professionals, executives, and business leaders keep continue to have about why they are unhappy in their jobs or careers. These otherwise qualified individuals live under the false illusion that finding the perfect career or job will automatically have them earning mega-bucks, working for a great boss, and enjoying a great life!

But not so fast! The truth is … if you want to fast track your career success … first, you need to address the elephants in the room as to why you’ve derailed your career.

The Elephant Tracks That Keep You Stuck

Elephant tracks are made by people not bring forth their A Game! They are more focused on gossip, factions, and not doing complete work.

I can do anything, but don’t want to do this. According to Gallup, over 80 percent of people are in jobs that don’t fit them.

Gimme, gimme. Many people jump for extra pennies or dollars in their paycheck, but then end up leaving those jobs because they are unhappy!

Grass is greener. All companies have their issues.  

I’m too busy. There’s a saying, “If you want something done, give it to a busy person.”

Bigger is better. A bigger company does not mean it is better run, regardless of their bigger budgets!

Rather than believe you’re stuck in a job or career, recognize you are there because of your unwillingness to make the needed changes. Only you are responsible for your work-life happiness!

Your Career Success IS an Inside Job

Remember, it’s an attitude. Take charge of your career.

  • Understand and clarify your strengths as they are, not as you believe they should be. Learn skill stacking. Take a qualified job fit assessment to clarify job fit.
  • Professionals who hire the right career or executive coach have a competitive edge, with their current employer or their next one. They enjoy their jobs again.
  • Empower yourself to ask for help. Stop waiting for someone to show you the right direction.
  • Stop mimicking others in hopes of becoming happier. Happiness is an inside job!
  • New opportunities will appear quicker when you have a great mindset and are focused on fulfilling your career goals.
  • Learn what your boss and the company needs done. Have strategic conversations (yes, many) to ensure you’re on the right track. Then, get busy.
  • You learn to how sell yourself in a business savvy manner. (https://SeibCo.com/books/).
  • You write down the top three must-haves for the next job, and take action to fulfill them in your current one!

Fast tracking your career success is an inside job. Focus on building your strengths, working with a coach to develop your EI, and be ready to move forward when opportunities appear.

©Jeannette Seibly 2012-2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Being successful in your career isn’t hard. Stop expecting your boss, company, and others to create your success! Look inside yourself. If you are stuck, reach out now before you talk yourself out of it. Contact me.

Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway:  https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q

What to Do When Team Members Fail to Tell the Truth

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(This is part two of a two-part article. Here’s the link for Part 1: https://seibco.com/telling-the-truth/

Team members lie for a variety of reasons. As a leader and boss, it’s crucial you learn how to address and handle situations and relationships where team members (and others) have lied, stretched the truth, or relied on innuendos.

It starts with hiring people who can tell the truth, admit their mistakes, and take responsibility for what they say and do. If you lack a strategic job fit selection process, you will be constantly on guard in conversations, and it will leak into your ability to work well with others too.

Why employees may feel the need to lie:

  • Lying is easier to handle than any fear
  • Fear losing their job, paycheck, or other work assignment
  • Are coping with anxiety and other stress-related issues
  • Avoiding responsibility for the harm and impact on others in the moment
  • Identity and habit (e.g., they were the go-to person – now they are not due to job changes)
  • The damage is already done and nothing bad has happened (yet)

What Can You Do to Protect Yourself, Your Team, and Your Company?

Listen to learn. Proactive protection requires being diligent in conversations and actually listening. This requires no multi-tasking, putting aside any electronic devices or other detractors, and focusing your attention on the speaker.

Ask open-ended questions. Use the Rule of 3 to deep dive into the facts to ensure you know and they know what is being said is the truth. Always use this approach when fact-finding or relying on data presented (e.g., negotiations).

Prep and document. Conduct research before conversations, not during (no multitasking). Write down what is said. Why write? Many studies have shown that writing uses the brain differently. You are more likely to question certain comments or statements. Example: “This is very interesting … can you tell me specifically where you got this data? How did you go about it? What did you learn?”

Encourage them to tell you the truth. “This may be difficult, but I need to know the actual facts of what happened.”

Power of Discernment. This is a skill you develop daily. Don’t be afraid to have the tough conversations by talking straight. (Example, if a company policy has been violated, be clear about what must happen next. And, follow through.)

Emotional Intelligence (EI). Being aware of your own EI helps develop an awareness and mindfulness to decipher when others are telling the truth or camouflaging facts. But, remember, lies, half-truths, and innuendos are an easy trap to fall into when people are in a hurry. Slow down since operating on false information will cost you top talent, key customers, and a positive bottom line.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Being able to discern truth from lies can be hard for everyone. When in doubt, ask for help from a qualified coach or therapist. Give me a call.

Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway:  https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q

Sometimes to Win You Need to Quit

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There are times you can win simply by quitting. It’s not losing. It’s not something most bosses or coaches will tell you. It’s what must happen to move forward.

While I don’t advocate giving up too soon, there are times when the game plan, mindset, or actions just are not going to get you where you need to go. And, change is not going to happen in a timely manner.

How to recognize when to quit:

  • You’ve talked to your coach and mentor, and they each said, “We cannot help you.”
  • You took a job knowing it was not the right one for you.
  • You joined a team that is poorly run, and sabotages your input (and energy).
  • The list is endless.

It is time to reassess when:

  • There’s been a financial drain.
  • Your health is at risk.
  • Resources are unavailable.
  • You are unwilling to have the needed conversations.
  • No one is willing to work with you on the project.
  • You’re unwilling to hire a coach and incorporate their ideas. (Then, it’s doubly time to quit!)

What Happens When You Hang on Too Long:

Feel bad. Feelings can and do change very quickly. Regretting hanging on too long rarely makes a difference to your team, investors, boss or customers.

Give up at with first problem. You give up too quickly because it’s not working out as you had envisioned.

Lack commitment to the goal. Momentum and inspiration will come and go depending on the work you’re willing to do.

Trying to leap when you should be taking smaller steps. Remember, the fable, The Tortoise and The Hare. Hares, slow down. Or, if you’ve been operating as a tortoise out of fear of failure, speed it up!

Relying on your inner dialogue. This will stop you when you only focus on what’s wrong!

Before You Quit!

Get clear. Work with an experienced coach. Every failure (and success) can provide “lessons learned.” If you don’t take the time now, it will show up again!

Complete What Worked / What Didn’t Work? Be objective to determine what you missed, ignored, or failed to do correctly. Use your numbers objectively. (Instead of, people were happy at the event; use objectivity – 20 people showed and 1 person requested a future conversation.) Talk with your coach to determine if these insights can rectify the plan, or if it’s time to scrap it as it is currently designed. (See Chapter 20, Get Your Brag On! for exercise)

Review your inner dialogue. It’s time to get real … not reinforcing “why it should’ve, could’ve and would’ve worked if only things, situations, and people had been different.”

Wobbly inner power. Too often, you’ve made yourself wrong, disempowered yourself (and others), or allowed someone to diminish or dismiss your project as important. Stop! Talk with your coach or therapist to get back on track before making a final decision to quit or proceed forward.

Be coachable.  Too often, people will give up too quickly due a myopic view of how it “should” look. After talking with your executive coach to determine if the project, plan or venture can be turned around profitably and fulfill the intended outcomes, it’s time to make the final decision. Realize a “decision not to make a decision” is a decision … and often a “No!”

If you’ve done the reflection, and are unwilling to modify your thoughts, feelings, and actions, it may be time to quit and move on. Do so gracefully. Remember, you didn’t lose. It just didn’t work. Now look for what’s next!

©Jeannette L. Seibly, 2012 -2026

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

There are times when life will throw you curve balls. If your commitment isn’t strong enough, it’s up to you to get into action with an experience coach. Then, make a decision to move forward or quit. Contact me.

Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway:  https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q

As a Leader, Do You Have Difficulty Telling the Truth?

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(This is part one of a two-part article.)

Many leaders are confronted when needing to tell an uncomfortable truth. They fear people will become upset with them when it isn’t what they want to hear. And these leaders lack the self-confidence and self-esteem to work through upsets with bosses, customers, employees and teams.

This is especially true for leaders wanting and needing to be “liked,” versus doing the right things the right way (e.g., failing to: follow policy, hire strategically, address bad behavior and poor work quality).

Why is it so hard?

They …

  • Rely on false information and believe what they are saying.
  • Have an automatic reaction when caught falsifying data, stealing, or ignoring policy.
  • Lack having done the research or talking with the right people.
  • Have an emotional attachment to the person or situation.

The inevitable outcomes are two-fold:

  1. When others find out you lied, you cannot be fully trusted again.
  2. If others relied on your information or data, they will question your ability to be a leader and refuse to work with you.

While leaders gain very little by stretching or ignoring the truth, it doesn’t stop many from doing it anyway and calling them “harmless little white lies.”

Remember, the truth will normally surface and what you gained by lying (stretching the truth) is short lived and costly for your leadership, career, and relationships.

Short-term benefits that are erased later:

  • Avoiding consequences — escaping blame, punishment, or discomfort for the moment.
  • Controlling a narrative — shaping how others see you, creating a false image.
  • Buying time — delaying a difficult conversation or decision.
  • Protecting ego — shielding yourself from shame, embarrassment, or vulnerability.
  • Manipulating outcomes — influencing others to get what you
  • Habitual lying — lying is a default coping mechanism.
  • Shame cycles — shame leads to lying, lying leads to more shame.
  • Avoidance patterns — some people would rather face a future crisis than a present discomfort.
  • Identity protection — they’re protecting the version of themselves they want others to see.

These gains feel real in the moment, but it’s like building a house on quick sand. It will eventually sink … then what?

Why do leaders and bosses continue lying when they know the truth will come out?

Chronic lying is less about deception and more about emotional survival strategies. Leaders lie when they don’t believe they can handle the consequences of the truth — or that others will fail to see they did the best they could.

In other words, people don’t lie because it’s smart. They lie because it’s easier than facing something painful right now or their ego isn’t ready to be vulnerable about mistakes.

Your short-term gain is not worth your long-term loss:

  • Trust — once broken, it’s incredibly hard to rebuild and people don’t forget.
  • Credibility — people doubt the truth you are telling and this will limit opportunities.
  • Relationships — lying corrodes intimacy, respect, and psychological safety.
  • Self-respect — living in contradiction wears a person down, lowers self-confidence and self-esteem.
  • Peace of mind — keeping lies straight is exhausting and usually will be uncovered by powerful listeners and fact-finders.

When the truth finally comes out, and it will, the short-term benefits rarely justify the long-term damage.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Telling the truth can be hard … especially if you don’t know what it is! Learn the power of discernment by improving your leadership skills now. Give me a call.

Listen to: The Business Power Hour: Deb Krier’s 1176 episode with Jeannette Seibly, feel the fear and do it anyway:  https://youtu.be/kQLaw_jN50Q

Work Well with Anyone, Anywhere at Any Time

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Successful business relationships do not happen overnight. They are created from mutual respect, trust, and experience. The focus is developing win/win/win outcomes that make a positive difference.

Developing the Leadership Skills Required to Work Well with Anyone

  1. Do what you say you’ll do, when you say you’ll do it.
  2. Apologize when you “drop the ball” and keep your word in the future.
  3. Take an interest in the company, people, products, financials, safety, community of others where you work.
  4. Be informed about the interests and concerns of your coworkers, boss, and team. Be able to interact appropriately.
  5. Show respect everyone on the team regardless of their opinions and personalities.
  6. Stop judging people by their manner of dress, background (e.g., education, work experience), or title in a company.
  7. Make it a habit to say “Please” & “Thank You.”
  8. Keep confidences. Don’t talk negatively about other people (aka gossiping).
  9. Level up your listening by setting aside your need to form comments or opinions while others are talking.
  10. Be comfortable with silence.
  11. Ask open-ended questions.
  12. Pay attention, nonverbal gestures and actions speak much louder than your words (80+ percent).
  13. Always, consider other people’s ideas and concerns when developing solutions.
  14. When talking or writing, use KISS: Keep Ideas Simple & Smart

©Jeannette Seibly 2010-2026

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

It’s always challenging to work with so many different personalities and expectations. Developing yourself as an effective leader requires the know-how to work with anyone, anywhere at any time. Contact me for a guide on how to work well with everyone.

 

Are You a Critical Leader?

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Effective leadership style produces intended team results on a regular basis.

Do you:

  • Find fault with other’s ideas and actions?
  • Believe your way is the only right way?
  • Blame mistakes on others?

Being a critical leader or boss can be tiring for both you and your team members. Your attitude and behavior make it difficult to work with you and nearly impossible to learn from you. Until you transform your critical mindset, you will never have a team that produces intended results on a regular basis.

How do you transform your critical mindset to lead an effective team?

Look for opportunities to praise.  Acknowledge others for a job well done, even if it’s a small step or contribution. Consider ideas that may initially seem off-the-wall or inappropriate, and acknowledge contributions in a positive manner.  Your openness will encourage everyone to stretch their thinking and behavior to improve their skills.

Learn from mistakes.  Every mistake can be turned into a learning moment. It’s important to understand the difference between a Zero Tolerance Policy for unacceptable behaviors versus reviewing and learning from mistakes. You and your team inevitably will make mistakes during a new task and new project, or working with new clients. Ensure your systems are up-to-date, and all your employees have the training needed to minimize errors at repetitive tasks. Develop a repeatable process when creating and executing new opportunities to ensure employees are aligned.

Make 2-2-2 your paradigm. Acknowledge two positive things they have done well. Then, share very specific areas for improvement, no more than two. Wrap-up with two positives they have done well. This makes feedback easier to give, and receive! (See Direct Approach vs. Sandwich Approach)

Hire a coach. It’s important for your own career and leadership development that you learn to effectively work with and through people to get the job done. An effective leadership style produces win/wins on a regular basis.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2010 -2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

All leaders need a periodic “checkup” on their effectiveness as a leader. Learn how to improve and produce intended results. Give me a call.

Turning Resistance into Resilience Achieves Results

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Most 55+ leaders have been fighting resistance for many years due (e.g., teams, peers, bosses, customers … the list goes on and on).

Some leaders take it personally, while others resort to intimidation or outtalking others. But intimidation and outtalking others do not turn resistance into getting the job done well.

People resist when they feel uncertain, uncomfortable, or imposed on.

When these types of situations occur, use them as signs you may need to strengthen your persuasive communication, trust building, and adaptability to new ideas. It’s time to become resilient and turn others’ resistance into “I can do it.”

Moving Past Others’ Resistance

Build Trust. It starts with hiring right! If you don’t hire for job fit – team members who aren’t interested in the task will delay getting the work done. Be resilient as a leader by assigning the work to the people who enjoy it, or at least will get it done right. While employees (and others) need to feel seen, heard, and valued (these build trust), they also need to be equipped with the resources to get the job done … and that’s your job (another trust builder).

Share Intended Results. Dictating, micromanaging, or using microaggressions only intimidate people. It does not reduce their resistance … they just learn to hide from you. Instead, ask open-ended questions and listen. “I have an assignment that needs to be done by tomorrow. Do you have time to get it done?” Then, use a Rule of 3 to ensure they truly have the interest and willingness to do so. Sharing results and the positive difference they can make is important for employees to feel valued.

Adapt Your Persuasive Style.  Adapting your ability to persuade others is important since many people are a “no” or “I guess I can.” This leaves you wondering if the job will be done well, if at all. Your job as a resilient leader is to provide reinforcement or support in getting an assignment done. If support is needed, offer by providing focused training and development. Trusted employees can surprise you by doing a better job than you!

Accept a “No” and Identify the Source of the Pushback. If a team member says they don’t have time to do it, learn why. Or, move on to the next person. Many times, the project may initially seem overwhelming and no one wants to look incompetent. This will occur if you have not taken the time to outline specifically what you need to have done and the desired results. If you are seen as someone who jumps from fire to fire, or idea to idea, slow down. The tortoise won the race, not the hare.

Give Them a Voice. Provide the goal and how you see it happening. Be open to their input and ideas and incorporate these whenever possible for a win-win-win outcome. Agree on a deadline. (Example, allow time to review a power point and make adjustments). Remember, when you’re giving ownership to a task or project, it reduces resistance along with providing positive reinforcement. Again, don’t micromanage.

The next time you are faced with team member resistance, channel it or embrace it with your leadership resilience.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Being resilient in the face of team member’s resistance is part of being a leader. Learn how to transform your team members from a “no” to a “yes.” Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Using Hiring Assessments to Revive Your Bottom Line

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“I started using the right hiring tools and have improved my bottom line.” President, Engineering Company

Companies everywhere must focus on strategies to improve team performance and revive their bottom line. Today, more than ever, there are many qualified job candidates seeking employment. But one bad hire can hurt a company’s retention, revenues, and results.

It starts with hiring and selecting the right employees for the right job … aka job fit, the first time. The challenge is too many companies spend more time evaluating equipment and systems than focusing on using the right tools and hiring practices to find and attract the right people who will use these systems.

“It is not experience that counts, or college degrees or other accepted factors – success hinges on fit with the job.” (Source: Harvard Business Review, Vol. 58, No. 5)

Today, more than ever, collecting objective data by using the right assessments for hiring and selecting the right employees will determine your company’s success and revenues.

Cost of Poor Hiring Practices

As a leader, you know your turnover rate. In fact, you may be proud that it is below industry standards. Yet, the truth is, you do not know how the actual costs of your current hiring practices impact your bottom line. (Think of the client you just lost and the intangible costs!)

Now is a great opportunity to calculate the cost of a bad hire, and how much it costs you to promote the wrong person, or lose a talented team member. When you do this, you will realize you’re losing money each and every quarter, even though your bottom line may be acceptable … not great … just OK!

Not All Assessments Are Created Equal

Not all assessments are designed for hiring and selection purposes. For example, AI‑powered personality quizzes are not validated for pre‑employment or promotion use. Using assessments that have not been statistically validated for pre-employment and selection purposes can get you in legal trouble, and have you rely on subjective, not objective data. Also, the wrong assessment will cause you to hire the wrong person for the right job OR hire the right person for the wrong job.

Why? People are like icebergs: they only let you see what they want you to see and what you don’t see under the surface is often far more significant and costly.

Using the wrong assessment or no assessment at all, allows candidates to tell you what you want to hear not what you need to hear. (Note: most hiring managers miss lies, misinterpret facts, and fail to listen to what a job candidate is actually saying. Deep diving using the Rule of 3 can discern the truth and overcome these issues, if you are listening.)

For example, candidates will…

  • Talk about the skills and talents they don’t use appropriately. (Or, haven’t used ever.)
  • Share achievements they didn’t accomplish. (Team work v. individual contributions.)
  • Win the job offer and not be the same person that shows up to work. (Or, ghosts you!)

These avoidable hiring mistakes will hinder your ability to revive your bottom line, and improve your retention and results.

Use the Right Assessment to Ensure Job Fit

You would not use a screwdriver to put a nail in the wall. The right tool is a hammer. Using the right assessment tools are no different.

There are over 3,000 assessments in the market today. Most do not meet the Department of Labor’s 13 Guidelines for Using Pre-Employment and Selection Assessments (See: Testing and Assessment: An Employer’s Guide to Good Practices, Department of Labor).

How do you choose the right assessment to determine job fit and core values?

There are two options:

  1. Read the DOL’s 13 Guidelines (citation noted two paragraphs above) and review the technical manual for each assessment. A qualified assessment will have a technical manual showing statistically that it meets the validity and reliability guidelines and all other requirements for pre-employment and selection purposes. The key is to ask for the technical manual and refuse to use an assessment for pre-employment and selection purposes without one.
  2. Talk with an assessment expert to guide you through the process.

When you take the time to select the right assessments and use them as directed, they work and will positively revive your bottom line.

*Source: “Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues, and Results!”

©Jeannette Seibly, 2015-2026

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

Do you have questions about how to use qualified assessments to get the best results? Contact me to understand the power of objective data.

Feel the Fear. What Are You Waiting For?

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Yes, I’ve written about this topic … a lot … and I still get questions about waiting and stalling to take the actions required to pursue your dreams or next chapter. This article focuses on how fear is the underlying culprit and waiting becomes the excuse or trap for staying where you are.

Your fears quietly shape and limit your choices. They keep you waiting for situations and people to change so you feel comfortable moving forward. You may read self-help books and listen to podcasts to motivate yourself. These actions can help. But they often keep you waiting, thinking and dreaming instead of taking the actions required to move forward.

When you fail to acknowledge your fear — that apprehension lurks beneath the waiting. Let’s delve into the fear patterns and learn how to recognize them. This can provide the awareness needed to keep you moving forward and taking the actions required.

Fear Doesn’t Sound Like Fear

It often sounds very reasonable:

  • “I’ll start when…”
  • “I don’t have enough information…”
  • “I’ll be ready when …”

Fear shows up as:

  • overthinking
  • perfectionism
  • procrastination
  • staying busy instead of focused

But the underlying true fears are:

  • Not feeling safe
  • Alone and not belonging
  • Ability to make the right choices

Let’s shift these fears:

  • from waiting to choosing
  • from fear to awareness
  • from dreaming to doing

The Parts Most People Miss

What many people miss when addressing these fears – we all have them — learning how to acknowledge them and let them support us in moving forward. Remember, fear doesn’t occur when you’re comfortable. Fear pops up when you need to make changes … whether you want to change or not.

Notice I didn’t say “wait for the fear to dissolve.” Fear isn’t going to do that on its own.  You need to acknowledge your fears, take baby steps, and stay in action when the going gets tough.

Fear of not feeling safe.

Inner strength — physical, mental, and emotional — develops when you do the work instead of going through the mental gymnastics and excuses as to why you can’t. Consider hiring a trainer, therapist and coach to guide you through these processes.

Here’s the key: do the work to the best of your ability. (Yes, reread that and write it down.) Over time, you will see an amazing shift in results. Fear won’t be so loud. Let your new attitude shine.

Fear of not making the right choices.

Every choice has a benefit and a consequence. Feel the fear and stop waiting … do the best you can with the information you currently have.

I remember buying a nice new condo that I enjoyed the first few months before it turned into the condo from h$*&. I took a loss when I finally sold it. But since then, looking back, I can see the benefit of having had to move … I now live in a much nicer home.

Fear of being alone and not belonging.

This can be the hardest one for most people who aren’t deep introverts or hermits. The fear of being alone or not belonging has you and others hanging onto friends, family members, neighbors, or community members. This may not be in your best interest.

This fear of letting go keeps you from growing and evolving in your personality, knowledge, and capabilities.

As you move forward, determine who you stay in connection with, and in what circumstances you stay part of a group, because not everyone is rooting for your success.

A client shared about a family member asking, “Don’t you get lonely not attending family get-togethers?”

His reply: “Not really.”

What he didn’t say — because it would have created more brouhaha — was that he often left family gatherings feeling diminished and emotionally beaten up.

As You Move Forward

Stop waiting. It won’t get any easier as time goes on and fear hangs around.

Feel the fear and move forward with awareness and intention. Talk with your coach, therapist, or mentor (or all three) to determine if the fear is valid or just holding you back.

Embrace the freedom available when taking action and enjoying things you’ve put off, ignored, or haven’t yet discovered. Healthful pursuits help you grow and develop inner strength and safety.

Examples:

Take a chance:

  • You won’t know if you enjoy golf until you take lessons and play.
  • Artistic pursuits? Same thing — take the lessons and see what happens.

Don’t be afraid of one-and-done.

  • I really wanted to learn how to ski. It took a while, but I finally learned — and stopped once I hit the intermediate level. I haven’t skied since. My goal was accomplished.

Welcome a new-found goal.

  • Publishing books (best sellers). I learned, made mistakes, stopped waiting, and put the fear aside to publish my next books.

 The Truth About Fear

  • Fear doesn’t magically go away.
  • Learn how to acknowledge your fear and stop waiting for that “perfect moment.”
  • Listen to your intuition … because there are times fears can be a good friend or ally.

Now … stop waiting and move forward.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Fear doesn’t disappear — but your willingness to act in the face of fear changes everything. If you’re ready to shift from waiting to doing, take the next step today and contact me. Your future self will thank you.

The Power of Discernment Improves Retention, Revenues, and Results

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When researching this important skill, I discovered that discernment can have a religious context. This article only focuses on leaders and bosses developing and utilizing this important skill. 

Every leader must deal with data, people and situations where lies are told, false truths are believed, and subterfuge gets in the way of achieving intended results and win-win-win outcomes. It’s where your ability as a leader must develop the skill of discernment to support your retention, revenues, and results. That is how you build trust and loyalty.

Definition: Discernment is the skill in making careful distinctions, especially in matters of truth, value, or character, and often involves making wise judgments. (Merriam Webster)

Utilizing this skill requires looking beyond the obvious, integrating your experience and emotional intelligence, and noticing discrepancies in data, conversations, and situations. Your integrity and ethics can support you (or not) in working through these insights instead of relying solely on superficial appearances or false facts. It’s always better to admit you don’t know the truth, rather than, lie about it.

How Do Lies and Half-Truths Occur?

When you rely on:

  • People’s words. Many people are poor communicators and listeners.
  • Social posts and media: There are many false facts.
  • Feelings and Skepticism: These often get in the way of hearing your intuition or gut.
  • Authority, Title or Degrees: Too many people fail to dive deeply into the basics and misstate facts and potential outcomes.

How to Improve Your Ability to Discern Fact from Fiction

First, and foremost … remember … discernment is a process. There will be times you will be wrong! When this happens, use diplomacy and apologize. Then, move on.

Breathe and Allow Silence. Put aside your know-it-all mindset in conversations. Too often you attempt to cover up uncomfortable pauses by filling in the silence. Your impatience gets in the way (often) and you miss important data and other information.

Listen and Learn. Ask open-ended questions to get started. Then, ask direct questions when focusing on the facts and truth. When responses go off track, bring their focus back to the topic at hand. Example: It’s very important during hiring, job promotions, and job transfers to be open to hearing what you don’t want to hear.

Deep Dive. Use the Rule of Three to determine the truth and relevant facts. Remember, spotting lies or exaggerations are far harder than people think.

Develop Your Intuition. Feelings are not the same as intuition or gut reactions. Feelings are past-based and signal an issue or issues you’ve not handled yet. Intuition comes out of the blue. It won’t tell you what to do but signals there’s something more to learn. Rely on conversations and not mental gyrations to uncover the truth (e.g., be careful of your biases or snap judgments).

Misinterpretation. This happens often. Too many people, including leaders and bosses, have poor listening and communication skills. When speaking they are unable to adequately put into words the facts — they are not lying, they are limited in their ability to express themselves. When this happens, ask the person to show you or draw a diagram of the issue.

Leadership Blind Spots. We all have them. These can get in the way of being open to hearing what others have to say, and clarifying what is true and what is not. Use a qualified job fit assessment to discover what your blind spots are.

Temper Your Need to Be Right. Egos discount what others have to say, or diminish or dismiss their ideas, concerns, or thoughts. I know of a manager that normally makes people feel wrong when they state a fact that he doesn’t agree with. But instead of acknowledging his weakness … he questions people to the point of being ineffective and discourages them from wanting to work with him. This is not discernment! It’s just poor management skills.

What if you are the liar, fearmonger or manipulator spinning things to be different? This can happen when you are unprepared, wanting to look good, or you just don’t care about the results. Remember, the truth normally (almost always) comes out.

Note for skeptics. While you have a difficult time believing anything anyone has to say … there are truthful facts based on the data, person, and situation. Learn how to discern what is true by using your skepticism wisely.

©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author with over 33 years of experience guiding people to empower themselves, transforming workplaces into places that work, and shaping leaders who truly lead.

Discernment is a skill learned over time. Understanding your blind spots as a leader can help you discern what is true and what is not. Contact me to go deeper and uncover the power of developing of your discernment skills.