Leaders who make reactive decisions when blocking someone, withholding support, and escalating conflict will lose credibility. These costly types of actions and decisions occur because their ego felt threatened. These ego‑driven reactions can stall initiatives, derail team performance, and limit future opportunities for leaders.
When your ego hijacks judgment and common sense, costing you credibility and future opportunities, it’s important to pivot immediately and regain trust without over explaining or defending.
What happens when your ego gets in the way with people or situations?
When you attempt to influence decisions that aren’t yours (e.g., promotions, assignments, board choices, political dynamics, strategy), it damages your reputation. Especially if others feel you are wrong, lack enough of the right information, or you rely on your feelings and disregard facts. It’s important to develop the discipline of respecting boundaries and being aware of company politics.
If someone has asked for help, ask questions instead of stating opinions that often overlook important details.
- Start by having the person briefly explain the concern.
- Ask open-ended questions.
- Be a committed listener (listening without comment and staying focused on the speaker) and allow the person to find their own answers.
- Acknowledge the work they’ve done in the conversation.
What do you do when you’ve been wrong about someone?
There will be times when your ego blocked a person and you declared them to be incompetent, ineffective, or in the wrong job (poor job fit). But the truth is, they are exceptional.
It’s important to:
- Acknowledge misjudgment without losing face
- Rebuild a working relationship
- Avoid doubling down on your reasons why to justify your mistake
- Turn up your humbleness and apologize
How do you stay professional when you believe someone made the wrong decision?
Leaders often behave poorly when they feel overlooked, undervalued, or not heard. Especially if someone else made what you believe is a bad decision (e.g., hiring, work project, handling a client issue). This poor EI (emotional intelligence) will come back to bite you if you insist you are right and they are wrong.
Instead:
- Use emotional detachment and talk with your executive coach to develop this all-important skill
- Avoid self-sabotage by doing what is needed and remaining an important part of the team
- Maintain composure under pressure when there are problems (and there will be) – avoid “I told you so” actions or comments
- Offer appropriate ideas or suggestions when asked
- Do not manipulate the decision to reflect what you believe is the only “right” way
- By following the above points, your leadership and professionalism will be recognized … if you stay humble
How do you handle leadership blind spots when your ego is triggered due to stress?
When you feel threatened, career-limiting derailers will surface and you will default to manipulation, defensiveness, avoidance, and overconfidence (traits of an unhealthy ego). It’s time to hire an executive coach and use the PXT Select® assessment to learn why and how to develop your leadership humbleness.
- Stay silent until you’ve worked with your executive coach, industry mentor, and therapist (when needed) or you risk damaging long-term credibility
- Allow real data from the PXT Select® to reveal blind spots and learn from them
- Be coachable and trainable – you can always learn new skills and how to use them effectively
- Apologize as needed, journal your upsets or frustrations (do NOT share), and don’t allow your annoyance (aka your ego) with others to run the show
As a leader, current and future, developing a healthy ego is required when making decisions or being at the effect of decisions others make. Entrepreneurial leaders who practice humility make better strategic choices, foster innovation, and strengthen team alignment … key drivers for long-term success.
©Jeannette Seibly 2026 All Rights Reserved
Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.