Most people would answer, “Of course.”
Yet earlier today, when a co-worker, employee, client, or family member needed to talk, were you fully present? Or were you checking email, playing Spider Solitaire, scrolling your phone, or letting your mind wander?
Then, when they asked a question, did you reply, “Could you repeat that? I wasn’t listening.”
Listening is more than hearing words. It’s being open to what is being said and what is possible.
I remember coaching a young man whose company had hired me to support his leadership development. During one of our calls, I suspected he wasn’t listening.
“What are you doing?” I asked.
He twitched and said, “Listening.”
“No, what are you really doing?”
With a sheepish grin, he admitted he was watching a newsfeed on his phone.
“You do remember these coaching calls are intended to prepare you for a promotion, right?” He nodded.
“As a leader, you need to learn how to truly listen, especially when you don’t want to hear what someone is saying.”
“Why?” he asked. “What if they’re boring or I’ve heard it before?”
“Because when you truly listen, you may hear a new solution, opportunity, or possibility. That’s how leaders grow and help others grow. Otherwise, your legacy will be, ‘He never listened.'”
When we’re open to hearing what’s being said, we often discover new possibilities, opportunities, and solutions. I experienced that firsthand several years ago during a casual conversation while walking in my neighborhood.
I was walking the one-mile park-like path where I live. There are always people out walking their dogs, and occasionally, they’ll stop to chat.
I recognized one dog and stopped to pet her. I asked the owner, “How are you doing? How’s Sadie?” She had adopted the dog only a month earlier.
“I’m doing well, and so is Sadie,” she said. Then she added, “I had been visualizing this dog. Other opportunities fell through, but I kept visualizing her. Now, here she is.”
Her comment caught my attention.
My cat had recently passed away, and I wasn’t sure whether I wanted another pet. But because I was open and listening, something shifted. I realized I did want another feline companion. I began visualizing, even cutting out a picture. Before long, I adopted Remy from the local humane society.
It happened because I was open to listening.
What Can You Do to Become More Open to Listening?
Be Curious. You don’t know everything, and you never will. Curiosity expands your ability to learn, grow, and discover new ideas, opportunities, and dreams.
Ask Questions. Many books offer excellent conversation starters. Use them to encourage meaningful dialogue and uncover ideas that may have been waiting beneath the surface.
If you don’t have a list of questions handy, trust yourself and rely on your curiosity and ask open-ended questions. That’s far more productive than gossiping or recycling the same conversations.
Humble Up. Your ego often tries to protect you by rejecting unfamiliar ideas.
When you hear something new, you may feel excited, uncomfortable, or even fearful. That’s often a sign you’re being challenged to grow.
Acknowledge the feelings. Stay open. Let the ideas develop. Then choose one and take action. Or, choose none and move on.
What new possibility opened up because you listened?
Consider Your Legacy
Wouldn’t you rather hear: “She was a great leader because she truly listened.”
instead of: “I dreaded going to work because she never listened to anything I had to say.”
The legacy you leave is shaped not only by what you say, but by how well you listen.
PS: As the holiday season nears, challenge yourself to be fully present in your conversations. Listen with curiosity. Ask questions. Put aside assumptions. You never know when a simple exchange may spark a new opportunity, reveal an unexpected solution, or open the door to a possibility you hadn’t considered.
© Jeannette Seibly 2025-2026 All Rights Reserved
Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For more than 34 years, she has helped executives and business leaders achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development.