Business

Recently I talked with a business owner that complained about people’s inability (or unwillingness) to follow-up and follow through. She was upset that people in business would behave that way. Ironically, she failed to follow-up and follow through on a commitment she made with me, and did not return my phone call or email. I was ghosted.

Whether you are someone new to the world of work or an experienced business professional, ghosting has become the new way of saying “no” or avoiding necessary conversations. However, the problem is, there are future consequences to this very bad practice.

What is ghosting?

Many will contend companies have been using ghosting practices for years when they ignored or snubbed job candidates.

Ghosting is now so prevalent that business professionals are using it to avoid having conversations and disappointing others.

New hires and current employees are using ghosting to avoid starting (and keeping) jobs they don’t want, having conversations they feel incapable of having and/or wanting to avoid confrontations.

Sadly, people using this ghosting practice fail to realize that a momentary feeling of relief won’t last. When you ignore or snub someone instead of talking it out or saying “no, thank you”, your reputation in the business world has been hurt, sometimes irrevocably.

People have long memories. Your new business ideas, desire to work with an elite team, hopes for the promotion or need for a new job can be sidelined. All because you practiced ghosting!

6 Good Practices Instead of Using ‘No Response is A Response’  

Conflict Resolution. Many business professionals use ghosting due to the fear (often, unconsciously) of saying “no” and wanting to avoid conflict or disappointment. Often, they fail to realize a short term burst of disappointment or discomfort is better than creating a long-term reputation where others avoid working and talking with you. If you have changed your mind, let the person know. Otherwise, your silence will create a lack of trust inside yourself, and with others.

Integrity. Doing what you say you will do is important and is a life-long practice to develop. Ignoring your promise to setup a business meeting, show up on the job or project or fulfill a promise may feel good in the moment. However, the truth may be, you forgot, are running late, failed to prepare or changed your mind. Call and have a voice-to-voice conversation directly with the person. Offer solutions, not excuses.

Emotional Intelligence. Many people today want to be part of a team, until, they feel their contributions are overlooked or their ideas dissed. Take responsibility for how you feel. It is a golden opportunity to develop the communication skills and confidence to talk it out. Remember, no one was born a powerful or experienced communicator. Everyone has feelings that come and go. Take classes (e.g., Toastmasters, Landmark), practice mindfulness, talk it out and role-play with someone you trust and/or hire a coach to guide you through the issue. Most importantly, learn from the experience.

Communicate. Gain confidence and competence by having voice-to-voice conversations. Do not blame others for your ghosting, regardless of the reason. Apologize. If you were waiting for a different job offer, oversold your abilities, felt uncomfortable during the interview process or wanted to avoid attending an event, tell the truth. Texting and social media are not the same as having conversations!

Due Diligence. Learn how to ask the right questions to discover true concerns or feelings of discomfort. Only say “yes” if it works for you, otherwise, say “no, thank you.” Build these skills now. They are critical for your success in working with others and completing future work assignments, while building your reputation.

Avoid Career Derailment. While the job market is really hot today, it will change. Being “blackballed” by recruiters, key employees, leaders and hiring managers can (and probably will) come back to haunt you in upcoming years. Many have a list and a longer memory. Do not ghost!

Using the above recommendations to avoid ghosting and learn how to communicate will make a profound difference in your career. These skills are critical to your success, now and in the future.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2018

Jeannette Seibly has been recognized as a catalyst for the past 25 years. As an executive coach, speaker and author, she provides straight talk with dynamic results.  Do you need help developing persuasive listening and communication skills? Are you willing to learn and use them? Don’t wait until you’ve ghosted the wrong person and get stuck with the consequences! Contact Jeannette now for a preliminary confidential conversation.

For busy business professionals, stress is unavoidable. It can negatively impact your results, interactions with people, and your ability to make necessary changes in your life. Stress impacts your ability to get things done the right way the first time. (And sometimes, you don’t get a second chance.)

If you are like me (and most people), you have stresses in your life: lack of time, concerns about money, bad habits, difficult situations and circumstances, frustrating employees, bosses, customers and systems. In addition, you might often think: I should have, would have and could have if only I had had the time, money, right employees, nicer customers, etc. (Sound familiar?) Stress can be cyclical, and these seemingly never-ending thoughts only add more stress. To disrupt the stress, you need clarify and take focused action steps to move forward.

11 Ways to De-Stress for Success

Pick one now and do it! It doesn’t matter which one. Just do it!

1.Prioritize. Not everything is a priority. Make a list of everything that you believe needs to be done. Circle the top ten. Now, cut the list down to the top three. Rank them 1, 2, and 3. Do number 1 now. When it’s done, move on to number 2. Now, it’s time for number 3. Celebrate the completion of each task.

2.Let Go. Not everything needs to be done immediately. If you need to file or shred papers, get an oil change for your vehicle, or replace a light bulb, schedule it on your calendar for later in the week. Then, honor that scheduled time.

3.Delegate. Stop being a lone ranger. Yes, your employees will not do things exactly the same way you would. Consider that they might do a better job … if you let them.

4.Do It for 20 minutes. Too often we have dreaded reports or other activities that must be done. Do it for 20 minutes. Then, decide if you wish to spend another 20 minutes or schedule it for later.

5.Excuses Be Gone. Too often, we create excuses about why we haven’t completed something. Stop doing this! This mental energy depletes you. Create a mantra: “I can do this and do it now.” Next, take the first step.

6.Stop Multitasking. Make a commitment to get one thing done at a time. There is satisfaction in fully completing something. While it may seem like multitasking allows you to get more things done, it rarely works that way. For example, attempting to write a report and listen to an employee at the same time only creates more stress … you will miss addressing important points in the report, and your employee will feel unimportant.

7.Walk It Out. Take 10 minutes, three times daily, to simply walk around, go up and down the stairs, or simply move! Remember to breathe!

8.Talk It Out. Turn your internal monologues into dialogues. Get them out of your head. Share your concerns with someone who can actually help you. It may be a good time to find a business coach who can help you stay focused and improve your effectiveness while decreasing your stress.

9.Write It Out. Studies have shown that when people write down their fears, upsets and frustrations, it can be cathartic. Writing helps get bad thoughts out of your head and provides insights. The key is to keep things private and not share your written journal with others. Do not send your upsets in an email or text to your boss, client, employee or co-worker (or post them on social media).

10.Meditate. Take time to simply empty your mind and be silent for several minutes. It can be refreshing. Sit comfortably. Focus on breathing in and out. When thoughts appear—and they will—say, “Noise.” Don’t make these thoughts good or bad. This may be the most effective and most difficult for highly stressed people.

11.Brag. When you learn how to brag, it is a huge confidence booster. Complete your Brag! statements. Keep these up to date and review them anytime stress doesn’t go away or you need a confidence boost.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2018

Jeannette Seibly has been called a catalyst. She is celebrating 25 years as a business coach, advisor and consultant who guides her clients to achieve unprecedented results. Remember, stress can be reduced when it’s managed effectively. Are you ready to de-stress for success? Step up now! Check out her website, or contact Jeannette for a preliminary confidential conversation.

Building effective teams to achieve results is important. It determines the quality of your products and services, employee satisfaction, and ability to meet and exceed customers’ expectations. However, as leaders, there are many times we fail to pay attention to team dynamics. Instead, we often wait around for someone else to do it. When a team loses its effectiveness, it’s important to quickly get the team back on track (think, right now).

7 Tips to Build an Effective Team

1.Training. When was the last time the team received training on how to conduct effective meetings? (I’m surprised by how many people have never been trained.) Many team leaders and team members are not well trained on how to lead and participate in meetings effectively. They’ve read a book or watched a video that focused on the material side of meetings (e.g., scheduling, seating, agendas, etc.), but rarely do books and videos address the human side of meetings. Bring in an outside facilitator to train everyone on conflict resolution, brainstorming, sharing ideas and appreciating each member’s contribution. It’s important to train everyone to be an effective team leader and team member.

2.True Goals. Were the goals created with the team? Even if you said yes to this question, chances are good that a senior person’s idea ends up as the goal. Or, sometimes the team latches onto the first good idea and runs with it. True goals are simple, quantifiable, achievable, agreed upon and provide a deadline for results. And, the team is aligned with the goals. The goal meets the company’s needs. Remember, if the team members don’t feel heard or valued during the goal creation process, they will stop participating.

3.Focused Action Plans. Has the team lost its focus or do they feel there are too many distractions? Many times, teams get caught up in the shiny object syndrome and fail to stay focused on the actions required to achieve this current goal. A good team leader will meet with the team frequently, as a group and individually. The team leader keeps everyone focused on the goal and helps uncover resources needed to move forward. While the scoreboard may factually show progress is being made, sole focus on meeting the goal will hide the fact that there are team members who are stuck and have checked out of the process. It’s important to keep everyone in focused action, one step at a time.

4.Communication. Are appropriate communication resources being used? Keeping everyone up to date with what each person has committed to do and showing the progress being made is key. It reminds each member that they are an integral part of the project’s success.

5.Manage the Team. Who is the team facilitator? While teams can be self-managing, usually there is a formally designated leader; otherwise, an informal one will emerge. It’s important to have someone in charge of facilitating the meeting, making sure resources and other needs are available, and coaching everyone involved to achieve the goal.

6.Delegation. Is someone being a lone ranger? Too often, poorly trained or highly controlling team leaders fail to delegate. Stop it! If you want to truly achieve unprecedented results, get everyone involved. If a team member is being a lone ranger, it’s critical to unravel this situation quickly before it goes on too long and the team leader loses the ability to correct the situation.

7.Celebrate. When was the last time everyone was acknowledged and appreciated? Celebrate the small steps, wins and other accomplishments of the group and individual team members. Don’t forget to share brags at each and every meeting.

Review each of these seven tips and make sure they are all implemented to improve the team’s effectiveness and their ability to achieve the intended results.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2018

Jeannette Seibly has been called a catalyst. She is celebrating 25 years as a business coach, advisor and consultant who guides her clients to achieve unprecedented results. Remember, meetings can be effective, fun and rewarding! And, they require everyone to become a team facilitator. Are you ready?