Optimize Human Performance

Are You Avoiding Kindness?

August 20, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

Real kindness requires backbone, not telling people what they want to hear (aka platitudes). In today’s workplace, kindness is required to be effective and to be a results‑producer.

A lack of kindness often comes at the expense of teamwork, accountability, quality, client care, and the bottom line.

Kindness used to mean helping people grow, telling the truth, and doing what’s right even when it’s hard.

But today, “kindness” has been reduced to being agreeable, avoiding discomfort, and keeping everyone happy. It’s a way of avoiding potential legal issues, addressing unreasonable demands, and preventing team or customer upsets. That’s not kindness. When leaders focus on being liked, keeping the customer or boss happy, and protecting the bottom line, this surface‑level civility (aka fake kindness) creates a legacy of being nice but makes the leader ineffective.

Where Has Kindness Gone Missing?

Truth telling. Leaders avoid honest feedback to “be kind,” leaving teams stuck, costs rising, and customers unhappy.
Accountability. Standards are softened to avoid hurt feelings, creating mediocrity.
Follow-through. Leaders promise support but fail to provide the resources and feedback required, negatively impacting the company and clients.
Kindness creates confusion when leaders tolerate conflicts, factions, and groupthink out of fear of being labeled a bad or mean boss.
Hard conversations are avoided due to lack of skill, fear of failure, or making the situation worse.
Kindness is applied selectively, creating confusion and resentment.
Offense‑seeking. Teams (and leaders) look for opportunities to feel offended, diminished, or discredited.
Decision‑making. Leaders delay or avoid making timely decisions to prevent upsetting someone, harming progress and trust.
Performance management. Avoiding tough conversations about poor performance hurts the individual, the team, and the customer.

The Blunt Truth About Kindness

Kindness isn’t soft or fuzzy. As a leader, it’s crucial to develop kindness with a backbone while guiding teams and customers through the inevitable difficulties, conflicts, and upsets.

Be Clear. Clarity is kindness. Provide the resources and truth required to get the job done. These conversations will take longer. The benefit? They allow the team to be innovative and surpass the intended results.
Be Direct. Directness with diplomacy prevents misunderstandings and raises standards. Keep the goal and intention in the forefront to move everyone forward.
Be Consistent. Consistency builds trust when you tell the truth early, directly, and respectfully. Remember you will need to repeat it many times during meetings and conversations.
Be Accountable. Accountability protects people and results through intended actions, not avoidance.
Be Courageous. Courage is the highest form of kindness for yourself and others. It guides teams and customers to do what they’ve been avoiding.
Be Compassionate. Chances are you’ve had a similar experience. Share a short story about how you handled a situation or relationship to support your own growth.
Be Generous. Appreciate each team member’s contribution. Encourage them to brag about their successes too.
Be Self‑Aware. Listen to the “tiny voice in your head” before saying something you’ll regret. Stop, breathe, and use silence when your critical voice is too loud.

A Leader’s Self‑Check

“Am I being kind or just agreeable?”
“Am I helping this person grow or keeping them comfortable?”
“Am I avoiding the truth and calling it kindness?”
“Am I protecting people through silence at the expense of the team or client?”
“Am I being authentic or just saying what is expected of me?”
“Are my expectations ego‑based?”
“Am I failing to hire the right people required to achieve needed results for customers?”
“Am I gaslighting someone because I failed to take responsibility?” (e.g., overscheduling, failing to keep promises, failing to listen, ignoring policies or systems)

Kindness isn’t about keeping people comfortable. It’s about guiding them to succeed. In today’s work world, kindness is required.

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

When Leaders Alienate Team Members, Poor Results, Poor Retention, and Declining Revenues Follow

August 10, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

This is Part 2 of a 2-part article. This one focuses on the leader’s role in avoiding and overcoming team alienation, which negatively impacts results. Link to Part 1.

When teams are failing, many leaders will claim they “don’t have the right people” as a way to distract others from their own inability or unwillingness to lead effectively.

The problem? It becomes the root cause of alienation, groupthink, and team breakdown, and is often not the real issue. Failure to acknowledge responsibility avoids addressing the leader’s lack of coachability, awareness, and skills required to resolve conflicts and manage projects for clients and company growth.

What’s missing? Leadership accountability for results, believing in each person, and supporting the company, client, and team when issues arise. These issues are more likely to arise when the leader’s negative mindset is focused on lack, failure, and upset over team members’ upsets, attitudes, and lack of commitment to the goal.

The Leader’s Blind Spots:

Over‑reliance on a few insiders or select team members
Inability and failure to address conflict early
Assumption of “I don’t have the right people” and fail to hire for job fit
Failure to create structure for success, or created ineffective ones
Allow groupthink to fill the vacuum
Do not value team members’ contributions
Fear of making mistakes or experiencing failure
Inappropriate use of tools for decisions (e.g., critical thinking, job fit assessments, over-reliance on AI)
Play favorites, create silos and factions
Lack the skills to coach people effectively while managing the process
Poor facilitation skills
Are not accountable and responsible for the results

Your reputation is lost and the team’s performance and innovation decline too.

This is when groupthink, cliques, and those with shared frustrations take over. It’s time for leaders to leverage up and prevent the inevitable chaos.

What can you do before alienation occurs?

If you are experiencing team alienation, talk with an experienced executive coach immediately. Alienation will not resolve itself, and in the meantime, your career options become very limited.

Reset your expectations and mindset.

If you expect to fail, you usually will.
If you expect problems, they will occur.
If you wish for different people on the team, they will wish for a different leader!

Instead, work with your executive coach weekly (or more frequently) to ensure your mindset and focus is on the goal and the process of achieving the intended results.

Get the support required to rebuild trust. This will not happen overnight or after one group meeting. It requires taking responsibility ongoingly and valuing your people in every interaction. Integrity is key … if you are cutting corners, ignoring issues, or allowing conflict to erupt, you have alienated the team.

It starts with you creating conditions for success:

Create win-win-win narratives
Share stories of other successes
Address the facts rather than relying on AI, social media headlines, and other false narratives
Ensure each and every team member are acknowledged for their contributions

Reintroduce structure and accountability, or create it. Structure is key, even for those team members that love to create and recreate and recreate some more. Put together the “game plan” and follow it, while holding yourself and team members accountable. Allow for initiatives and innovative ideas, but stay focused on the intention and end goal. Use a dashboard or other means to keep everyone apprised of the progress.

Use objective tools and processes to focus on the project, goals, and intended results. When mistakes and failures happen, and they will, have an objective way in which to address them. Blaming a person or smaller group will only add to dissension, finger pointing, and alienation.

Address groupthink cycles as they occur to stop them from taking over. This can happen very subtly when a group of people have worked together in the past, have hit a “wall,” and are skeptical or fearful of doing anything different. Address and talk through the fears upfront and consistently.

Learn how to achieve alignment. It’s important to learn this skill to avoid the consensus trap of stalling and negating others’ opinions and expertise. This requires courage since many teams use consensus as a way to stop progress, keep traditions, and avoid moving out of their comfort zones. It’s not easy when you have a small group that believes they are right or are unable or unwilling to see the bigger picture.

Remember:

The leader’s belief and mindset become the team’s culture
Groupthink forms around a leader’s indecisiveness and exclusion of people and ideas
All people on the team are the “right people”
Leaders need to build alignment
Effective leaders have effective coaches

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people in empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

Groupthink Hurts Results, Retention, and Revenues

August 3, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

This is Part 1 of a 2-part article. Part 1 focuses on teams alienating leaders and team members due to groupthink. Part 2 focuses on how leaders can avoid or overcome team alienation.

Every team comes to the table with long‑held traditions, sacred elephants, and the mindset of “how we’ve always done it.” Even when the leader or team member is steady and capable, the team’s anxiety can turn into quiet resistance, defensiveness, and groupthink where they believe the past matters more than moving forward or telling the truth.

Groupthink erodes trust, stalls decisions, and magnifies every unresolved issue. Slowly, the team disintegrates turning the original problem into an impossible mountain or disbanding entirely. The false sense of unity will eventually fracture the team into silos and factions.

In the process, the team ignores the leader or team member(s).

When Groupthink Takes Hold

In a study by ScienceDirect, “groupthink is more common than one would like to think.” Groupthink emerges when team members prioritize harmony, belonging, or shared frustration over critical thinking, and leads to dysfunctional decision-making.

The group reinforces its own beliefs, filters out contradictory information, and rewards conformity.
Dissent becomes risky, so no one challenges the emerging “leader we don’t like” narrative.
Develop an illusion of invulnerability — the belief that the group’s decision is correct and infallible.
Ignore ethical or moral concerns, overlook risks, or fail to consider outside perspectives.

The Escalation Pattern

Once groupthink solidifies:

The leader’s decisions are interpreted negatively, regardless of merit.
Neutral actions are reframed as evidence of the leader’s incompetence or bias.
The group amplifies small mistakes into “proof.”
Silence becomes agreement, accelerating the alienation.

The Cost of Groupthink

Alienating a leader or team member, especially a competent one, creates ripple effects:

Loss of direction and accountability.
Fragmented communication and diminished trust.
Increased turnover and political maneuvering.
Decline in psychological safety and innovation.
Closed doors and opportunities for the team, company, or association.
Loss of top talent, avoidable expenses, and poor results are unavoidable.

How to Break the Cycle

To prevent or reverse leader and team alienation:

Reintroduce structured decision‑making. Brainstorming, critical thinking, and alignment on decisions (not consensus) are important to ensure active participation of all team members. This also brings up issues that need to be addressed. Do not avoid elephants!
Ask each and every person for their input. This includes accepting diverse viewpoints. As the leader, you will need to go around the team several times to ensure all voices are heard.
Address cliques and insider groups directly. When you bring a team together for the first time or for each new project, outline expectations, goals, and processes. Also, mention you expect people to work together for the benefit of the client or project goal. This normally needs to be repeated during each meeting.
Rebuild trust through transparency and shared goals. How does this client or project benefit others? What can we do to improve the process or delivery?
Use objective tools (e.g., assessments, facilitation) to set or reset team dynamics. When hiring, use job-fit assessments to ensure you are hiring the right people for what needs to be done. When selecting people to work on a team, conduct a short interview to ensure they will be committed to the goal of the team. Ensure you are continually improving your facilitation skills.

Leaders and all team members must stay aware of group dynamics, challenge groupthink early, and avoid the trap of blaming others instead of strengthening their own leadership effectiveness. As the leader, it is your responsibility to stop groupthink in its tracks.

How Do You Handle Feedback without Being Defensive?

July 30, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

Receiving feedback and hearing it is a skill that many leaders and bosses need to develop. Being defensive is a difficult behavior to overcome since, too often, people want to defend their actions, attitudes, and results.

Why?

They:

Find it hard to laugh at themselves
Worked hard but failed to ask for help and instead accepted mediocrity
Have a perfectionist attitude
Feel misjudged (and it may be true)
Are overly sensitive to hearing anything that is negative
Blame the person delivering the feedback for the way they speak or deliver the information – their excuse for not listening

As a leader, you may cause team members to be defensive when you:

Are critical
Overreact to situations
Expect perfection
Take things personally
Have poor feedback and coaching skills

The additional problem is, coaching and feedback are difficult to hear when delivered poorly!

Yet, you will find that people excel when they are open and receptive to feedback without being defensive. (Think of well-paid sports people, leaders excelling in their work, entrepreneurs selling their startups, etc.)

How to Hear Feedback without Being Defensive

Be open and value the insight, whether you want to hear it or not.
Set aside ego. While you may not like being judged, develop a healthy ego that is committed to your success.
Ask for clarification or example. Ask open-ended questions, and hear the value offered. (Even when the feedback or coaching is poorly delivered.)
Thank the person for their insights. Include their recommendations where appropriate (e.g., if you winging presentations, a plan and practice will make a big difference in your career).
Remember, saying you’ll think about it is a different way of being defensive.

How to Deliver Feedback without Being Defensive

Talk with a select few people that were impacted or aware of the situation. Be careful about nitpicking someone’s personality. If someone talks too much, instead of saying that, say, “It’s important in these situations that you listen more than talk. And, here’s why.”
Use sandwich or direct approach. This depends on the person and the type of feedback you need to deliver.
Practice with your coach. Especially if you’re a new leader, or believe the person will be defensive.
Keep it simple. No more than two key issues or challenges. Yes, there may be more feedback you feel is necessary. But that can be overwhelming and not helpful. (I’ve seen leaders and bosses give an employee a list of 20 items … the person was overwhelmed and became defensive. Consider, in this case and similar ones, that it is due to poor job fit.) Again, to ensure great results, only provide two at a time and check in with the person to determine progress before adding additional areas for improvement … you find additional feedback is not necessary.
Make a plan for improvement. For team members, it’s important that there is a process they can follow and learn from.
- Either: The most effective choice is to have the person create it (be clear about required outcomes and have a “By When Date” this will occur).
- Or, provide a process for them to follow, which will not be as effective because there may not be buy in, and will be effective as long as you are managing the process.
Now, follow-up and follow-through. Most people skip this … big mistake! You need to have regular check ins to ensure progress is being made. It also shows your commitment to the person’s success.

Do You Need to Hire Salespeople? What Are 5 Key Tips to Ensure They Fit the Job?

July 27, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

Hiring salespeople can be a challenge. Many look and/or talk the part, but once hired, fail to produce the required results. It’s up to you to improve your selection process to uncover salespeople who can actually sell your product or service, and fit the job requirements.

Remember, it’s always faster, easier, and far less expensive to determine their ability to sell before you hire them. If you don’t, you’ll spend too much money and energy — and face sleepless nights attempting to fix them (and this never works out well for anyone).

5 Tips to Improve Your Selection Process

Listening Skills Are they listening? Can they hear you? Do they respond appropriately? Ask the candidate to summarize the interview or parts of the conversation by asking, “Tell me what you heard?”
Do They Ask Questions? Do they have questions about your company, product, management style, etc.? If not, move on. Candidates who don’t ask questions lack the curiosity, interests, and skills to inquire further.
Are They Calm and Patient? Does the person squirm in their seat? Do they rush the conversation or attempt to finish your sentences? Do they look at you when speaking or listening? While closing is a required skill, it also requires the ability to ask several times in several different ways without being offensive.
Do They Fit the Job? To determine key traits, most salespeople need prospecting, presenting, and closing skills must have the interest to use these skills. Use a qualified job‑fit assessment. Can they do these things? Will they do these things? And can they do these things for your company and product?
Do They Tell the Truth? To objectively answer this question, first use an honesty/integrity assessment to uncover omissions not found in public records. It saves time and money by eliminating candidates who stretch the truth (think customer expectations and fulfillment). Second, always conduct thorough due diligence with final candidates by checking background, education, and other accomplishments.

Bonus Tip: Do They Follow a Sales Process?

Sales Process Discipline. Many salespeople rely on charm, personality, or improvisation. But consistent results require following a repeatable sales process. Notice whether the candidate follows your interview structure, asks clarifying questions, and moves through conversations logically. Salespeople who resist structure rarely produce consistent results.

Want to Accelerate Career Options? Make a Lateral Move

July 23, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

I remember talking with a woman who had been unemployed for a while. When I suggested she ‘stretch’ from finance into operations by making a lateral move, she looked at me like I’d grown another head.

“Oh no! I’m very committed to staying in my profession,” she exclaimed.

I replied, “It doesn’t mean you will not return to finance. However, gaining operational experience in running a department or team can greatly boost your business acumen. Lateral moves can provide you a diverse skill set, increased visibility, and credibility as a future leader.”

What are lateral career moves?

A lateral career move is a strategic transition to a role at the same level of responsibility and pay, designed to broaden skills, gain new experiences, and position yourself for future advancement. (Indeed)

What are the benefits?

Can be beneficial for learning new skills or securing your future.
Learning different duties or responsibilities.
Increased visibility
Credibility as a future leader
Note: Not recommended if you make too many of them or face a career setback.

Making a lateral move doesn’t mean you were not qualified in your current profession or previous position. A “stretch position” can accelerate your career growth and options because it provides broader exposure to business challenges, making you a better boss/leader, decision-maker, and business professional. It’s also a great way to skill stack your experiences, education, and expertise.

How to Prepare for a Lateral Move

Job Fit Assessment. Be clear about your strengths and weaknesses before making a job transition. Use an objective job fit assessment that provides a “job fit pattern” for the lateral position. This helps you (and your new boss) understand where to focus when coaching and managing you for success.

Get Your Brag On! Complete the five easy steps for sharing your wins and successes. Sharing these during networking meetings and interviews for the lateral position will make a difference. Remember, there will be “cross-over” skills, and you must emphasize them (e.g., communication, finance, people, technology) since you cannot rely on the job titles, professional experiences, and job responsibilities they normally seek.

Networking Works. Do your homework by going out for coffee or lunch, or Zoom with several people already working in the profession. What do they enjoy about it? What are the challenges? How can you, with your current experiences, make a difference? Use open-ended questions to learn more. Remember, this is crucial … listen to learn!

Prepare for the Interview. You will be ready for the interview after following the first three recommendations above. Be sure to conduct your due diligence during all interviews for the lateral position about expectations, goals, and any challenges in the position. It is important to address any reluctance of the company, team, or hiring boss upfront without being defensive. After you’ve been offered the position, it’s time to discuss salary and benefits … they may not change … this is about gaining experience, not a pay increase at the present moment.

Keys for Success: Learn the basics, listen more than talk, and have a positive can-do attitude. Hire an executive coach and select a mentor to talk through the inevitable sticky situations and political work relationships that will occur. Also, take the time now to develop essential leadership skills in emotional intelligence, communication, critical thinking, and project management. These are valued “cross-over skills” in any position aka skill stacking.

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Build a Strong and Dynamic Team to Produce Great Results

July 20, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

Many leaders today struggle with building a team that produces intended results, is innovative, and works well together. Many leaders blame their lack of success on the belief that the “right” team members cannot be found.

The real problem? Leaders fail to take responsibility and be held accountable for hiring, coaching, and managing their team (individually and as a group) to be strong and dynamic. Instead, they rely on outdated management of the processes and execution of the goal. When they claim they “don’t have the right people,” it is a way to distract others from their inability or unwillingness to lead effectively.

How to Transform Your Team and Achieve Intended Results

A leader’s beliefs matter. Your beliefs can become an excuse that prevents you from developing teams, addressing blind spots, and doing the real work required to build a strong and dynamic team. To improve everyone’s skills, you must be willing to look in the mirror, acknowledge what’s not working, and take deliberate steps to strengthen your leadership effectiveness through coaching, feedback, and consistent practice.

Hire for job fit. This is the ignored key to ensure you have the right people on the team, with the skills, attitude, behavior, and interests to achieve the intended results. Don’t forget onboarding is critical to each person’s success … it gives them the direction and support to integrate well and become productive more quickly.

Remove your ego. A healthy ego is key. An unhealthy ego will sabotage your results. If you’re egotistical and unable to be a true leader for your team, step aside. OR hire an experienced executive coach to guide you along the way. This requires developing emotional intelligence and awareness of what may trigger your upsets, frustrations, and other poor communication habits.

Manage for results, not personalities. This can be a hard one: Focus on the action plan while staying focused on the goal. This can be difficult when people don’t get along, create miscommunication, and are not team players. Use a qualified job fit assessment that reveals objective data, not how the person wants to be seen, which will camouflage job fit and hurt results. This clarity will improve results, while strengthening your team.

Define role expectations. Address clearly defined roles, who makes which decisions, and expectations. Many teams fail not because of talent, but because people don’t know what “success” looks like in their role or how their work connects to the bigger picture. It’s up to you to communicate and guide the way.

Create or follow accountability systems. Instead of “winging it,” create or use structures that keep teams aligned: metrics, check-ins, dashboards, or performance conversations. Leaders often “get out of the way” by stepping back so far that the team lacks direction, guardrails, and timely feedback, leaving people to guess at priorities, make assumptions, and commit avoidable mistakes.

Communicate with intention. When you are being indecisive, people will take advantage of you. Instead, be clear about the goal, budget, and any other defined structures or limitations. Admit when you are uncertain about what to do next. Ask the team for their input by asking open-ended questions. Encourage brainstorming, and avoid the trap of seeking consensus. Remember, innovation and communication improve when people feel safe speaking up. The solutions will reveal themselves.

Apologies are required. When mistakes occur, and they will, own them. Apologize. Move forward. All is not lost if you are looking for the lesson(s) learned from the mistake or failure. Many times, it leads to the next successful innovation!

Use Please and Thank You! People want to feel valued. If you are not appreciating your team and the individuals that support the process and achievement of the intended results, you are not building a strong and dynamic team … just one that’s waiting to move on … and away from you.

Celebrate and Brag! Every milestone is important, since each one leverages your next one. Speak positively about your team members, and ensure there is a celebration beyond a weekly pizza.

Why We Block Ourselves and How to Finally Step Through

July 16, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

Many people block themselves, especially if they are high achievers and struggle with self‑imposed barriers. What’s missing for them and the rest of us? Accountability, resilience, responsibility, clarity, and moving forward.

These blocks can last hours, days, and weeks.

Common blocks are:

Many of us have confidence, yet choose not to use it.
We can be great listeners, yet talk over people.
We are reliable, yet arrive late or deliver incomplete work.
We are results‑producers, yet fail to make the sale or get buy‑in for a new idea.
We are leaders, yet have become followers of something we don’t even believe in.

The problem isn’t the block. The problem is what we make the block mean.

No one is perfect. Forgive yourself, apologize when needed, and step through and move forward now. Stop waiting and take one step today that honors your word and moves you forward. If you’re still stuck or blocked, consider talking with an executive coach or therapist to help you regain clarity and momentum.

The Real Reasons We Give in to the Blocks

When asked why we don’t get work done, pursue a dream, or complete a project, most people offer familiar excuses:

“I have a bad boss.”
“I don’t enjoy my job.”
“Someone else can handle it.”
“I don’t have the money.”
“I don’t have the time.”

But the truth is simpler and harder to admit: You actually don’t want to do it, and no one is going to make you. It’s your block!

Today, many people feel entitled to their emotional reactions, using them as justification to block their own success. We all have emotional blocks. They can tend to show up at the worst possible times. Yet, the problem is we treat them as if they are the truth about ourselves, the situation, or the relationship!

Remember, there are many other people with the same familiar excuses, yet they persevere and step forward, creating momentum by taking one small step at a time.

A Moment of Choice

Recently, at a first‑time event, I found myself hesitating since I didn’t know anyone but the host of the meeting. I was being careful, quiet, and holding back. Then I caught myself: “Whoa. Stop.”

When the leader called on me, I stepped through the block and spoke with confidence. That’s the moment everything shifted: the moment I chose to be the person I am.

Now, think of a moment when you have allowed your self‑consciousness or fear to block you and get in the way. Then you used it as your excuse to play small, withhold ideas, or leave the conversation early (while still in the meeting).

This is your reminder to stop letting those moments define you. It requires taking the first step through them now, or reach out to an executive coach who can help you practice doing so.

How to Get There

Get thoughts out of your head and onto paper.
Acknowledge the block. Name it. Don’t dramatize it.
Listen to podcasts. Fill your mind with voices that elevate your thinking.
Write a full page of successes. Wins, abundance, positive moments. Writing activates the brain differently and builds confidence. (For additional insight, “Get Your Brag On!”)
Stay out of rabbit holes. Overthinking is a trap disguised as productivity.
Set a daily goal and intention. Small commitments build momentum.
Dial up humbleness; dial down ego. Replace “I shouldn’t have to do this” with “This moves me forward.” A healthy (not overactive) ego can make a world of difference!
Allow others to help. Drop the “I can do it myself” mindset.
Review what’s true. Separate your reality from others’ expectations.
Apologize to yourself and others. Then follow through. Integrity grows from action.

If you continue to struggle on how to step through you block(s), work with a coach or a therapist to help you stay accountable and move forward faster.

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy‑driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values‑based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Leaders With Healthy Egos Produce Intended Results

July 13, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

Your ego, as a leader, can be both a benefit and a cost to relationships, retention, results, and revenues. Egos can be both useful and dangerous: it can fuel confidence and drive OR blind leaders to reality and damage trust and results.

Example: When hiring employees, your ego gets in the way by not listening and instead, relying on intuition, gut reactions, or biases. The hiring boss fails to collect objective data, and then, acts surprised when the new employee miscommunicates, ignores team members, and performance is subpar.

Egos fuel entitlement and self-sabotage. Egotistical leaders believe the rules don’t apply to them or that their position earns them special treatment. They rely on being right, being in control, or being seen as the smartest person in the room. This erodes their credibility and trust because the ego is wired to protect identity and status, especially when a leader feels insecure, which undermines intended results.

Conversely, a healthy ego becomes a stabilizer. Leaders who don’t need special treatment or constant validation make clearer decisions, build stronger relationships, and earn genuine respect. This grounded approach strengthens trust, psychological safety, and a culture where team members follow because they want to.

Costs of Allowing Egos to Manage the Leader

Self‑Belief vs. Arrogance. When confidence becomes arrogance, leaders become defensive, overconfident, and dismissive, driving poor decisions and pushing top talent and customers out the door.
Lack of Self‑Awareness. Without self‑awareness, leaders miss the moment when the ego takes over, derails conversations, damages relationships, and creates avoidable conflict.
Breakdown in Listening. Ego-driven leaders talk over others, assume they already know the answer, and shut down collaboration, which stifles innovation and team engagement.
Distorted Decision‑Making. Egos narrow perspective, causing leaders to ignore data and dismiss alternatives to “prove they’re right.”
Avoid Accountability. Leaders who let their egos run the show blame others, justify poor choices, and resist feedback, weakening credibility and slowing team performance.
Erosion of Trust. When ego overshadows humility, psychological safety disappears, people stop speaking up, and overall innovation and performance decline.

How to Develop a Healthy Ego

A healthy ego provides confidence, resilience, and steadiness when under pressure. Strong leaders know when to dial the ego down and dial humility up to move teams forward, handle tough conversations, and build reliable working relationships.

Self‑Belief vs. Arrogance. Leaders with true confidence asks open-ended questions, listen, and build win-win-win results. When they make mistakes or misspeak, they apologize immediately.
Self‑Awareness as the Regulator. Self‑awareness helps leaders recognize when ego is helping and when it’s hijacking judgment. Pausing, noticing triggers, and using feedback as a mirror prevents unnecessary conflict and poor decisions.
Intentional Listening. Practicing curiosity and humility are skills that can be developed. This way of listening restores collaboration without letting conversations go sideways.
Objective Decision‑Making. Using objective data while engaging in diverse viewpoints and structured decision processes prevents costly missteps, especially in hiring, strategy creation, and fulfillment of intended results.
Accountability and Ownership. A healthy ego takes responsibility, slows down to include the team, and ensures everyone contributes for stronger results.
Build Trust. When balancing ego with humbleness, a healthy ego helps leaders believe in their teams, overcome setbacks, and create win‑win‑win outcomes.
Strengthen Effectiveness. Leaders with a healthy ego build self‑awareness habits, seek reality checks, use structured decision frameworks, separate identity from ideas, and treat humility as a leadership tool.
Ask For and Accept Help. Healthy‑ego leaders know they can’t do it all. Asking for help, accepting support, and working with mentors or a coach keeps blind spots in check and strengthens decision‑making.

A healthy ego models strength by showing the team that collaboration, guidance, and continuous improvement are essential to effective leadership. Tools like PXT Select® and the PXT Select® Leadership Report provide objective insights into how leaders think, behave, and make decisions, especially when under pressure. (The PXT Select® also bolsters team members, especially when there has been conflict, miscommunication, and too many mistakes and failures along the way.)

Work Well with Anyone, Anywhere at Any Time

June 5, 2026 by Jeannette Seibly

Successful business relationships do not happen overnight. They are created from mutual respect, trust, and experience. The focus is developing win/win/win outcomes that make a positive difference.

Developing the Leadership Skills Required to Work Well with Anyone

Do what you say you’ll do, when you say you’ll do it.
Apologize when you “drop the ball” and keep your word in the future.
Take an interest in the company, people, products, financials, safety, community of others where you work.
Be informed about the interests and concerns of your coworkers, boss, and team. Be able to interact appropriately.
Show respect everyone on the team regardless of their opinions and personalities.
Stop judging people by their manner of dress, background (e.g., education, work experience), or title in a company.
Make it a habit to say “Please” & “Thank You.”
Keep confidences. Don’t talk negatively about other people (aka gossiping).
Level up your listening by setting aside your need to form comments or opinions while others are talking.
Be comfortable with silence.
Ask open-ended questions.
Pay attention, nonverbal gestures and actions speak much louder than your words (80+ percent).
Always, consider other people’s ideas and concerns when developing solutions.
When talking or writing, use KISS: Keep Ideas Simple & Smart

Jeannette Seibly is a Leadership Results Coach, Talent Advisor, and Business Author with 33 years of experience activating greatness in leaders and companies. She delivers practical coaching and solutions that elevate performance today, build legacies that stand the test of time, and support people empowering themselves to lead with clarity and impact.

It’s always challenging to work with so many different personalities and expectations. Developing yourself as an effective leader requires the know-how to work with anyone, anywhere at any time. Contact me for a guide on how to work well with everyone.