How to Have Conversations for Positive Results (Part 2)

This is Part 2 of a two-part article:

When having conversations, it can be difficult today to know what to share, and when and if to share it.

In last week’s article (Part 1), I wrote about why conversations sharing too much information – too soon (TMI-TS) can hurt your credibility, sales, and building solutions for positive results.

This week, I will go deeper into how to overcome sharing TMI-TS and offer strategies for creating positive results through great conversations.

How to Overcome Sharing TMI – TS (Too Much Information – Too Soon)

Invest in developing an effective communication style since it is the key to your career and business success!

1. Who Is Your Audience? Share from your own human story your lesson learned (yes, only one) to overcome your mistake or performance challenge. Remember, keep it short and on point — people have short attention spans!
2. Be Aware of Your True Intention. Our minds are great at circular logic or rationalization. While you may believe you’re being forthright, it may come across as manipulative, falsely believing you’re being authentic. Talk with your coach to ensure your conversations attract and engage others, not repel them by sharing TMI-TS.
3. Honor Today’s Business Expectations. Using four-letter words, jargon, and other off-putting communication styles may seem trendy. The truth is that it conveys a poor communication style that hurts your credibility when someone doesn’t know you. Develop stronger relationships first before letting your vocabulary loose!
4. Apply for a Job. TMI-TS is telling your personal story, labeling yourself, or announcing must-haves in the first job interview. While you may believe it’ll avoid a problem boss or employer, it hurts your chances of a job offer. While the interviewer may not be biased, it is often not a true representation of the workplace culture.

• Instead, create a professional “brag” introduction and then focus on answering job-related questions. Before the interview, conduct networking research (Chapter 9, It’s Time to Brag!) by talking with current and past employees.

5. Listen as a Hiring Boss. Stick with job-related questions. Don’t interact with a job candidate about being gay, divorced, or bored (ADHD) (to name a few examples!). It’s why the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has a huge backlog of allegations claiming discrimination (e.g., gender, race, ethnicity, medical) when the claimant wasn’t offered the position or promotion. 

6. Share Your Story. While sharing stories can build good working relationships, consider the impact and timing first. Practice in front of a mirror to ensure you feel comfortable telling it! Remember: Keep It Short and On-Point!

• In a public presentation, sharing a personal experience can engage the audience. (Examples: “Why this helped me succeed.” OR “What I’ve done to change a bad habit.”)
• In an inner-company meeting, share only your personal experiences, not someone else’s. Be sure to tell the story within the context of the conversation.
• In network meetings or trade shows, talk about products and services. To get the conversation started, brag about an achievement. (Example: “I am a Leadership Results Coach and have guided 100s of bosses to improve their hiring, coaching, and managing results.” Jeannette Seibly)

7. Acceptance Takes Time. “I’m concerned about others accepting me,” a businessman lamented. Then, he countered, “I don’t want to spend time developing a relationship with a client who won’t accept me as a Republican (Jewish, gay, or ???).” Acceptance takes time. This fear thwarts a commitment to your purpose, business vision, and mission in conversations. 

• Instead, share your “brags” about who you are and why you’re good at what you do. While business is changing, TMI-TS doesn’t work. The good news is that many business relationships today overlook lifestyle choices when you are respectful and trustworthy, depending on how you communicate them. 

8. Addressing Poor Job Performance. Too often, when you rely on a personal story to discuss why you failed … it can be heard as an excuse and may limit your credibility and influence. 

• Instead, hire an executive coach to get real about your poor job performance since many bosses are not good coaches. This is often due to poor job fit. For example, expecting good attorneys also to be good rainmakers (sales).

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a champion for bosses and teams delivering intended results. Does your company or department have a persistent problem? With Jeannette’s extensive experience and wisdom, she guides clients through sticky situations and challenging relationships for dynamic results! Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion.

A note from Jeannette about how to have conversations for positive results: Sharing too much information too soon (TMI -TS) hurts your credibility, others’ willingness to listen, and your results! Contact me for a confidential conversation about how to communicate for positive results!

Build your confidence and success as a boss! Great bosses work with an experienced executive coach as a sounding board. I have extensive experience guiding bosses and leaders to hire, coach, and manage their teams to achieve unprecedented results. Contact me to learn more about my in-depth, one-on-one, customized coaching program. Remember, coaching speeds up your ability to communicate like a great boss!

Want to know why your team has poor communication skills? Use the PXT Select to ensure job fit for hiring, coaching, and managing success.