Leadership development

How Do You Listen Effectively?

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“If you’re listening to respond, cut people off, or have a ready answer, you’re not listening!” Jeannette Seibly

In creating our legacy and shaping our future, we must learn how to listen effectively. How you listen honors your legacy and the legacy of others. This is critical as you move forward in creating and fulfilling projects, supporting communities that are important to you, and supporting neighbors and family who enjoy being with you.

However, too often we listen through our own filters:

  • Biases, judgments, or assumptions about whether someone’s story “fits” what we already believe.
  • Listening to reply, not to understand.
  • Thinking of the next thing we want to say.
  • Making a quick decision that the person isn’t worth listening to.

The above are examples of not truly listening. In fact, if you have a response ready before the person finishes speaking, you’re not really listening!

Why Listening Matters for Your Legacy

Listening is more than a skill. It’s a way of honoring stories, discerning values, and building meaningful connections. For adults 55+, listening deeply allows us to:

  • Capture wisdom that might otherwise be lost.
  • Strengthen relationships by truly hearing what matters.
  • Shape our legacy by aligning words, actions, and values.
  • Create communities where every voice is valued, and every story has impact.

Other Considerations for Listening in Everyday Life 

  • Attention to detail: Do you notice the pauses, memories, and details that reveal care and intention?
  • Reactionary or calm: Do they respond with patience, or with quick judgment? A calm tone reveals resilience. A reactionary tone indicates they are still dealing with their anger and the unfairness of the situation.
  • Community spirit: Are they positively contributing to family, friendships, or community events?
  • Openness to growth: Even later in life, are they willing to learn, adapt, or grow?

Listening Beyond Words 

  • Consistency between words and actions: Do their stories match how they live? Listen for three examples or themes that reveal true values.
  • Ownership of mistakes and failures: Can they admit missteps and explain what they learned? That’s wisdom worth passing on.
  • Curiosity and initiative: Do they ask questions about others, the world, or legacy? Genuine curiosity signals engagement.
  • Values alignment: Notice whether their personal values resonate with the community you want to build. Do themes like autonomy, service, or sustainability keep surfacing?
  • Communication clarity: Can they share complex life lessons in ways others can understand and carry forward?

 Practical Listening Habits to Build Your Legacy

  • Pause before responding. Silence often reveals more than a rushed answer.
  • Listen for patterns, not isolated statements. One polished story doesn’t equal consistency in how one lives life.
  • Note emotional tone. Calm confidence differs from rehearsed charm.
  • Separate impression from evidence. Write down what you heard versus what you felt. Then, compare. If it’s not consistent, ask yourself: Are they truly sharing, or just talking to talk? Or, do I need to “level up” my listening?

Remember, what you do to honor your legacy and the legacy of others begins and ends with the way you listen.

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Amazon Best-Selling Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Do you want to improve your listening? Do you journal? Contact me, and I’ll send you a complimentary copy of Journaling Prompts: Practicing Deep Listening.

The Three Main Saboteurs that Prevent Achieving Results

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“Your results will be sabotaged by doubt, fear, and negative talk. Transform them now before it’s too late.” Jeannette Seibly

While there can be many deterrents to achieving your goals or legacy, the biggest saboteurs are: Doubt, Fear, and Negative Talk.

Definitions:

  • Doubt: Questioning your ability or the possibility of success.
  • Fear: Anticipating negative outcomes that prevent action.
  • Negative Talk: Criticizing yourself or others, especially with self‑talk.

Examples:

  • “I doubt it will work.”
  • “I doubt I can get the funding or approval.”
  • “I’m afraid to talk with my boss, she is a naysayer.”
  • “I’m afraid to spend the money to invest in myself. What if I need the money later?”
  • “I’m a loser, a failure. Nobody likes me.”
  • “She’ll never succeed; why bother?”

Several years ago, Magda wanted to launch her own consulting practice. She had the skills, the network, and even a few clients waiting. But Magda kept saying, “I doubt I can make it work. What if I fail?” Fear stopped her from investing in a website, and negative self-talk convinced her she wasn’t “good enough.” Six months later, Magda watched Dina start a similar business and succeed with the very idea Magda had shelved. Magda had allowed her “saboteurs” to win.

Can you see yourself in this story? Many can, if you’re being honest. What are your usual saboteurs when mistakes threaten failure, or things are not working out as you believe they should?

Unfortunately, it’s easy to fall into these limiting traps whether it be family, work, or pursuing personal goals. It’s why you fail to achieve what you really, really, really want in life. You’ve allowed your saboteurs to determine the outcome of your results.

The good news is that these saboteurs don’t have to define you or your results. With simple shifts in perspectives and practices, you will improve your results.

How to Turn Saboteurs into Stepping Stones for Success

To overcome these saboteurs, practice three powerful shifts:

  • Reframe: Change the story. “Yes, I failed to achieve my goal last month, and that doesn’t mean I will fail this month. In fact, I just received a call from a prospective client.” Another phrase to consider while taking action, “I can do this and I do it.”
  • Own: Accept responsibility and learn. Ask, “What did I learn?” Use the exercise, “What Worked? / What Didn’t Work?” to uncover insights. Identify the weakness, mistake, or failure in planning and make the positive change. Don’t blame yourself or others!
  • Brag: Celebrate your wins, and the wins of your team. Completing your brags builds self‑confidence and reminds you of your competence. In the book Get Your Brag On! you’ll find several exercises to quickly turn doubt, fear, and negative talk into positives.

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Amazon Best-Selling Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Have you been ambushed by the three saboteurs? It’s time to talk about how to shift those saboteurs and achieve your intended results.

Do You Want Your Leadership to Make a Positive Difference?

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“Your leadership style builds your influence, reputation, and legacy.” Jeannette Seibly

Influence, reputation, and legacy are not built by title alone. They are sustained by the people-centered skills that leaders should practice every day. For many leaders, experience and expertise are invaluable, but the ability to connect, facilitate, communicate, and make sound decisions often determines whether their leadership style makes a positive difference.

The Challenge

Even the most accomplished leaders can find themselves at crossroads:

  • People skills may need refreshing to engage diverse generations.
  • Facilitation skills must evolve to foster collaboration rather than control.
  • Communication skills require clarity, empathy, and adaptability in a noisy world.
  • Decision-making skills demand balance between wisdom and openness to new perspectives.

The Opportunity

By fine-tuning these people-centered skills, you can:

  • Amplify your impact by guiding teams with generosity and positive acknowledgement.
  • Model intentional leadership that blends honesty, responsibility, and accountability.
  • Create pathways for others to grow without losing their own expertise.
  • Develop your emotional intelligence and emotional integrity—intelligence helps you understand emotions, while integrity ensures you act with consistency and values.

And most importantly, these practices connect directly to your leadership style and legacy: the imprint you leave on people, organizations, and communities long after your role has changed.

Practical Pathways Forward

Level Up Your Skills by measuring your progress. Use engagement scores, retention data, or feedback loops to track whether your leadership style is truly making a positive difference. Examples include:

These tools provide both internal and external perspectives, helping you align your leadership practices with the legacy you intend to leave.

Very Important Note: Many leaders do not feel ready to read (current and future). I have coached and mentored many professionals who faced challenges early in their careers. And advised them to provide pathways that help future leaders and bosses grow, contribute, and thrive.

© Jeannette Seibly 2020–2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core.

Contact me to see my “Fine-Tuning Leadership Skills Guide.” Start today to build a strong leadership style and make a positive difference.

Supporting Gen Z to be Effective Leaders

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“Leadership is not about being the smartest person in the room; it’s about collaborating effectively.” Jeannette Seibly

At a recent business meeting, I encountered a young woman whose leadership energy was undeniable. She radiated confidence, spoke with conviction, and clearly had the drive to influence and inspire. Yet, as the conversation progressed, her potential was overshadowed by two challenges: she believed she was the smartest person in the room, and her emotions often erupted unchecked. These behaviors, if not addressed, sabotage leadership and future opportunities. (Note: Gen Z was born between 1997 and 2012.)

The Promise Gen Z Leaders Bring

Gen Z is reshaping the leadership landscape. They are:

  • Innovative thinkers who embrace technology and fresh ideas.
  • Fearless voices willing to challenge norms and disrupt traditional hierarchies.
  • Authentic leaders who want their work to align with values and purpose.

This generation’s leadership spirit is a powerful force. But like any force, it requires balance.

The Leadership Growth Required

In this meeting, the young woman’s expertise was undermined by behaviors that eroded her credibility:

  • Intellectual arrogance: She dismissed others’ perspectives, assuming her ideas were superior.
  • Emotional outbursts: She interrupted peers, grew visibly angry at senior leaders, and failed to regulate her reactions.
  • Damaged trust: These actions created tension, making collaboration difficult, and diminishing her professional presence.

Several of the leaders in the room questioned whether the young woman had the professional ability (and maturity) to be in the business conversation they had been having.

Lessons for Emerging Leaders

As bosses and leaders, Gen Z’s leadership drive must be paired with emotional maturity.

Key lessons include:

  • Humility as strength: Listening actively and respecting others’ contributions builds influence.
  • Emotional intelligence: Patience, empathy, and composure are essential for leadership.
  • Client and team relationships: Influence comes from guiding, not dictating. People respond to partnership, not control.
  • Professional presence: Credibility grows when passion is expressed with respect and balance. Using appropriate brag metrics provides influence.
  • Develop a win-win-win mindset: Learning how to create bridges instead of burning them is critical, especially for Gen Zs. They have a long career ahead of them. They will never know when the person they dissed or company leader they offended is in a position to hire or promote them, or do business with their company. While they may say they “don’t care,” someday, they will.

Guidance for Mentors and Coaches

Seasoned professionals play a vital role in shaping Gen Z leaders now and in the future:

  • Offer constructive feedback that redirects energy without diminishing confidence.
  • Model calm collaboration so younger leaders can see composure in action.
  • Create safe learning spaces where mistakes become opportunities for growth rather than career‑ending missteps.
  • Offer workshops and other training (e.g., videos) where the person can learn how to offer ideas without dominating the conversation or alienating others. Providing a job fit assessment leadership report can also provide important insights.

A leadership spirit is a gift. But without humility and emotional intelligence, it will cause self‑sabotage. The young woman I met has the raw talent to succeed, but her journey will depend on whether she learns to balance confidence with respect, and passion with patience.

For Gen Z leaders, the challenge is not just to step forward boldly, but to grow wise enough to make your leadership sustainable and be coachable.

Very Important Note: Having coached and mentored a number of people who are now older and more experienced, many-faced similar challenges early in their careers, including being fired. I strongly encourage bosses and leaders to provide counsel that helps these individuals strengthen their people, communication, and facilitation skills. Doing so ensures you won’t lose their drive, innovative ideas, and fearless voices, and in turn, these individuals will continue to grow, contribute, and thrive.

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core.

Do you have employees that need help with their leadership, communication, and decision-making skills, including Gen Z? It’s time to contact me and develop a program that supports everyone’s success.

Do You Have Problems Working with Authority?

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“If you want to succeed, you must learn to listen to and work well with your boss.” Jeannette Seibly

Do you:

  • Deny having authority issues and place blame for mistakes on your boss?
  • Look for approval from your boss and seldom get it?
  • Ignore advice and instead argue for your point-of-view?
  • Do it your way when your boss or board says, “No”?
  • Have a team that bickers a lot?

Can you imagine NFL team players thumbing their nose at the coach when told to adopt a new game strategy? I cannot either.

Yet, many times, business leaders fail to work well with authority! They believe they know how things should work and fail to listen to sage advice on how it normally works. This closed mindset costs them valuable time, money, and energy that could have been better used for business success.

7 Tips to Improve Effective Working Relationships

  1. Recognize You Have a Problem. Awareness is the first step toward meaningful change. When you cringe because someone sounds like your mom, dad, or teacher, you have a trigger. Heal the relationship with your parent(s) and you will go further faster as a leader.
  2. Learn to Positively Handle Feedback and Criticism. Many times, when you get triggered, it has nothing to do with the feedback. It’s an automatic reaction from your ego saying, “Don’t talk to me that way.” Breathe. Put your feelings into words. Learn to ask questions for clarification. If you truly listen, you will find your boss’s insights (or someone else’s) were “right on.”
  3. Encourage Brainstorming and Listening to New Ideas. When you or your team know-it-all and rely only on past efforts, you will fail to get to the core issue or true solution. Be open to listening to others … it saves time and money while creating viable solutions.
  4. Resolve Conflict Before It Derails Results. Leaders who avoid authority often create unnecessary conflict. Their poor communication styles and inconsistent work ethics make it hard for team members to succeed. Unresolved tension drains energy and stalls progress. Proactive leaders seek coaching and support to address issues early—before they escalate and negatively impact performance.
  5. Learn to Delegate. If you want to achieve true leadership, you must stop doing it yourself and learn to trust your team! To expand your business, sales results, and influence with your team, create a team that is resilient, reliable, and resourceful. That starts with your willingness to listen and work well with your boss, board, team, and customers.
  6. Get Over, “Do It My Way.” Life is not about doing everything “your way.” Yet, there are many stories on social media about DIYers. It takes maturity and experience to work well with your boss, team, customers, business, and bottom line. You will make mistakes. But your ability to learn from those mistakes and seek counsel will improve your results.
  7. Take a Good Long Look in the Mirror. If you are a leader that acts as a lone ranger, be aware your team members will mimic you! While you may believe this is OK, at some point, it will create irrevocable issues at the wrong time! Learn to be coachable and understand there are other workable ways to get the best results.

Everyone has an authority figure: boss, board, team, and/or customers. They that provide invaluable feedback and criticism when you listen. Failure to listen and learn will sideline your career.

© Jeannette Seibly, 2021–2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Amazon Best-Selling Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Take the time to develop effective working relationships, be coachable, and take feedback, while learning from your mistakes. This is can be impossible to do on your own. If this true for you, contact me for a confidential conversation.

Spotting Hidden Talent Easily

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“Spotting hidden talent can be easy and will increase employee, customer retention, and profitability.” Jeannette Seibly

Did you know hidden talent can be easily spotted using a well-designed job-fit selection system?

While many complain about the difficulty of finding “hidden talent,” the reality is that the right person may be sitting right in front of you. Unfortunately, biases often cloud our ability to see candidates as they truly are. Other barriers—such as lack of objective data, unrealistic expectations, and flawed assumptions—can further obscure their potential. The list goes on.

Bottom line: We miss spotting hidden talent due to a lack of good, reliable, and replicable objective data when making hiring, promotion, and job transfer decisions.

Ways to Avoid These Common Pitfalls

Prepare Job Applicants. Send them a helpful video about your interview process and what to expect. For many, this is their first time talking with your company. Provide several interview questions (and be sure to ask at least one or two of these) so they feel comfortable with your selection process. Also, send them a link to the brag book: “The Secret to Winning the Job: Start Bragging!” Many applicants have hidden talents that they need to learn how to share effectively.

Use a Valid Honesty/Integrity Assessment. Make sure it’s a direct admission tool and use only for pre-employment purposes (not current employees). This can help weed out candidates who are good at selling themselves but have things to hide. They also help create safer workplace environments. Be sure to check local and state statutes to avoid asking inappropriate questions (e.g., age, marital status, children, etc.). Contact me for a product brochure.

Conduct Phone Screen Interviews to Gather Objective Data. Ask questions designed to reveal facts about past employment and education. Verifying and documenting are essential. Too often, candidates aren’t honest about their past … they just want the job. (For help creating questions, READ Chapter 10, Hire Amazing Employees)

Too often, we rely on intuitive hiring rather than using a strategic job-fit system and obtaining objective data. Then, we are surprised 2 hours, 2 weeks, or 2 months later when we realize the person who showed up isn’t the one we interviewed. This is avoidable.

Use a Qualified Job-Fit Assessment. It’s crucial to see the “whole person” (e.g., thinking style, core behaviors, and occupational interests). Using the wrong assessment allows applicants to present themselves as they want to be seen—not as they truly are. With over 3,000 published assessments available, it’s easy to select ones not designed or compliant with Department of Labor standards for pre-employment use. How do you know the difference? Ask for a technical manual and check for distortion, predictive validity, reliability, and validity coefficients. (See Chapter 9, Use the Right Assessments and Skill Tests, Hire Amazing Employees) Using the correct assessment, the right way, makes all the difference in the selection process!

Using a qualified job fit assessment helps alleviate concerns about the legalities of who you are hiring.

Interview for Job Fit. Too often, our beliefs about required skills are sabotaged by subjective biases (e.g., good at math = good accountant; friendly = great boss). Ask job-related questions and listen! Hidden talent will reveal itself when you deep dive into their responses using the “Rule of 3” to determine the depth of their skills. (For additional insights on the “Rule of 3” and creating job-related questions, READ Chapter 10, Hire Amazing Employees)

Conduct Due Diligence. It’s not uncommon for applicants to list education, job titles, and companies that don’t exist! Conduct background, licensing, education, and other checks. Using a third-party provider often ensures a thorough and consistent process. (SEE Chapter 17, Types of Checks, Hire Amazing Employees)

Require Onboarding for Best Results. Start when the job offer is accepted and continue over several months. Otherwise, your newest talent may “leave” while still on the payroll. (READ Chapter 20, The Success of a New Hire Is Up to You!, Hire Amazing Employees)

© Jeannette Seibly 2024–2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core.

Spotting hidden talent is easy when you use a well-designed strategic job fit system. When was the last time you reviewed your hiring practices? If you want to improve your retention, results, and revenues, contact me.

Want to Be Motivated? Take Action!

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“The hardest part of a project or venture is getting started. It starts with the first small step.” Jeannette Seibly

The hardest part of any new venture or project often comes after the initial excitement fades. You’re staring at the plan you created, and overwhelm begins to creep in.

You notice missing pieces.

Your inner psyche chirps, “You cannot do this.”

Your doubt screams, “What were you thinking?”

Or worse, “What will others say?”

Even if you’re not fully aware of your doubts and fears, they will sabotage your progress unless addressed in a positive, proactive way.

Here’s the truth: action creates motivation—not the other way around, despite what many of us were taught to believe. We often use a lack of motivation as an excuse to play small or avoid taking any action at all. But attempting big steps too soon will sabotage your efforts.

What’s the solution?

Take action by identifying the smallest possible step—then, do it.

Take One Small Step

  • Want to lose weight? Put on your walking shoes. Nothing else. Then, the next day, put them on again. Soon, you’ll be out walking! (Yes, this really works.)
  • Want to save money? Set aside 1% each time you receive any money. Before long, you’ll be amazed at how much you’ve accumulated.
  • Want that promotion? Take the smallest action possible—like buying your Get Your Brag On! book. This helps you avoid overwhelm and prevents you from missing critical details that could sabotage your efforts.

Make Sure Your Environment Is Supportive

This includes both physical and emotional spaces.

  • If your home office is in the basement and you dread going down there, move it somewhere you enjoy.
  • If your team members constantly naysay everything, it may be time for new ones. But beware: if they’re pushing back on your habit of constantly changing things, listen. That habit may be your saboteur—not them.

Celebrate Progress

Remember: Your new project or venture isn’t overwhelming. You simply need to take small actions, make thoughtful adjustments, and stop sabotaging yourself. Enjoy the process of creating results one step at a time. Your actions will feed your motivation to continue to move forward.

© Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Amazon Best-Selling Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Ready to take action—but unclear about what you really, really, really want to achieve? Let’s talk.

Stop Sabotaging Your Work Relationships

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“Want to make a positive difference in your working relationships? Do what you say you’ll do.” Jeannette Seibly

Many bosses and leaders don’t prioritize building proactive, healthy work relationships. They’re often in denial, fail to see the value, or unknowingly sabotage their ability to collaborate effectively.

As a result, when support is needed to resolve workplace issues or navigate complex customer challenges, they’re left disappointed, frustrated, or hurt. Why? Because the co-workers and bosses they ignored or dismissed are now unavailable—or worse, judgmental. These colleagues may respond with, “Here’s what I would’ve done,” or “You should’ve asked me sooner,” rather than offering real help.

Sabine, a mid-level boss constantly complained about her director. Her best friend finally urged her to hire an executive coach. Sabine didn’t believe a coach could fix the problem—especially not the slashed quarterly bonuses or lack of resources—but she reluctantly agreed.

Her coach offered a simple recommendation: “Go have a conversation with your director. Not just any conversation—one that makes a real, positive difference. Start building a better work relationship. You don’t have to like him, but you do need to respect that he’s your boss.”

Sabine snapped, “If I’d known you were going to tell me that, I never would’ve hired you.” The coach replied calmly, “But you did hire me. Now do it. You’ll be amazed at the difference.”

Sabine followed through—and the coach was right. The results were phenomenal. Sabine became one of the few people who could work well with that director.

The bonus? Six months later, the company president called Sabine: “I heard you’re doing great things. When you’re ready, I want you to run one of my new companies.”

Building strong work relationships—especially with difficult team members or bosses—directly impacts your promotability, results, and career opportunities.

How to Develop Better Relationships

  • Listen—Really Listen. Yes, I say that often. But unless you truly listen, the rest of these tips won’t matter.
  • Take Responsibility for Biases and Judgments. You may think no one notices how you really feel about someone—but it shows. In your choice of words, your gestures, your attitudes. In fact, over 80 percent of what you communicate is nonverbal. That’s why it’s essential to challenge your outdated beliefs and improve your communication style. Attend workshops or courses that help you do the work. And don’t just show up—participate. Sitting on the sidelines or pretending to listen won’t move the needle.
  • Respect Others. Stop making excuses for not supporting the team.

Example: If you struggle to hear during Zoom meetings, turn up the volume on your laptop—it might not be a Zoom issue. If you suspect hearing loss, get tested. Excuses erode trust and disrespect your team.

Another Example: Talking over others when they disagree with your comment or opinion.

  • Get Involved. As a leader, stay engaged—especially when your team asks for help or resources. That doesn’t mean micromanaging (unless necessary). Guide your team to take initiative, talk things out, and stay accountable. That’s how trust and results grow.
  • Ask for Help. Seeking input strengthens relationships—ignoring others when you need help will weaken the relationships. Many leaders avoid asking for help until they’re forced to. Then, their egos get in the way: “I already tried that,” or “That won’t work.” Asking for help doesn’t mean you’re not capable—it means you’re open to better ideas, new perspectives, and collaborative solutions.
  • Honor Your Word. Don’t just talk about what you’ll do—do it. Start small. Example: Concerned about 1:1s with employees? Solution: Schedule monthly 1:1s to start—then increase as needed. Many of you believe you have integrity and do what you say you’ll do. When you do what you say you’ll do, you build trust and credibility.
  • Make Win-Win-Win Decisions. Your decisions affect others—even in subtle ways. Poor decisions can quietly derail team progress. To make better choices, hire a coach, ask for input, and listen. Again, listen. That’s how you honor your word and strengthen relationships. Then follow up: Did it work? If not, conduct a “What Worked? / What Didn’t Work?” review to identify what was missing.

© Jeannette Seibly 2024-2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core. When was the last time you stopped long enough to really look at the strengths and weaknesses of your working relationships?  If you have any concerns, let’s talk and put you on the path toward achieving unprecedented results.

Are You Open to Listening?

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“Are you open to hearing what’s being said? If not, you’ll lose out on many new possibilities, opportunities, and solutions.” Jeannette Seibly

Most of you would say, “Of course.”

But earlier today, when a co-worker or employee needed to talk, you played Spider Solitaire or let your thoughts wander while they spoke. Then, when they asked a question, you replied, “Could you please repeat that? I wasn’t listening.” You do that more than once.

I remember coaching a young man whose company had asked me to support his leadership growth. During the call, I suspected he wasn’t listening. I asked what he was doing.

He twitched and said, “Listening.”

“No, what are you really doing?”

He gave a sheepish grin and admitted he was watching a newsfeed on his phone.

“You do remember the purpose of these calls is to prepare you for a promotion, correct?” He nodded.

“As a leader, you need to learn how to truly listen—especially when you don’t want to hear what someone is saying.”

He asked, “Why? If they’re boring or I’ve heard it before?”

I responded, “Because in your listening, you and others can hear something new … a solution … new opportunity … new possibility. It’s how you develop your leadership—and your people. Otherwise, your legacy might be, ‘He never listened.’”

Several years ago, I was walking in the one-mile parklike setting where I live. There are usually plenty of people out with their dogs. Sometimes, they’ll even talk with you!

I recognized a dog, so I stopped to pet her. I asked the woman, “How are you doing? How’s Sadie?” She’d adopted the dog just a month earlier.

She said, “I’m good. Sadie’s doing well, too.” I smiled. Then she added, “I had been visualizing this dog. Other opportunities fell through, but I kept visualizing. Now, here she is.”

Why was this important to me? My cat had just passed away. I wasn’t sure if I wanted another. But in that moment of being open and listening, I knew I did. Later, I started visualizing. Even cut out a picture. Within a short time, I adopted Remy from the local humane shelter.

It happened because I was open to listening.

What Do You Need to Do to Improve Your Openness to Listening?

  • Be Curious. You don’t know it all. You never will. When you bring curiosity to your listening, you learn, grow, and develop ideas or dreams.
  • Ask Questions. There are books filled with conversation starters. They’re helpful. When using these ideas, these prompts can also unlock deeper thoughts you’ve been mulling over. If you don’t have a book with question starters, use your curiosity and ask open-ended questions. This is much better than gossiping—or recycling the same old ideas.
  • Humble Up. Your ego will try to protect you by refusing to listen. When you hear new ideas, you might feel excited… then uncomfortable… then fearful. That’s a good sign. It means the ideas are nudging you forward. Acknowledge your feelings—and keep the ideas flowing. Then, take focused action on one of them! What opened up?

Here’s another way to look at it: Wouldn’t it be better if your legacy said, “He was a great boss because he really listened,” rather than, “I hated going to work each day because he never listened to anything I said.”

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Amazon Best-Selling Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Ready to elevate your openness to positively impact your next chapter? Let’s talk.

Why Expedient Hiring Can Backfire and How to Resolve It

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“When you hire too fast, you will miss important character factors that impact your company’s future.” Jeannette Seibly

A tech company’s president left after two years of poor results—the third person to exit in five years. The CEO stepped in temporarily, but soon demanded of his management team, “Get that new person hired immediately and have them start tomorrow.”

Instead of using a strategic job fit process, the CEO let a committee of the president’s former reports choose the candidate—without using validated assessments, multiple interviews, or stakeholder alignment. Several weeks later, they picked someone they liked. The CEO rubberstamped the hire to relieve his stress.

In their haste, they rehired a well-liked former president with the same leadership gaps: weak strategy, poor accountability, and a focus on being liked. The CEO’s stress would soon return—and ripple through employees and customers.

Sadly, when companies need to hire now, many find themselves relying on excuses for why their selection failed instead of implementing a valid hiring process. They ignore the fact that taking the time to hire the right person the first-time costs far less—in time, money, and morale—than repeating the cycle of hire, train, and replace.

By implementing and following a strategic job fit system, the hiring process becomes not only easier but far more effective.

Why Expedient Hiring Usually Backfires

  • Missing Soft Skills: Quick hires often focus on technical qualifications, overlooking traits like empathy, adaptability, and communication—qualities that shape team dynamics and customer interactions. Many job candidates are well versed in talking around a subject and don’t know how to talk straight.
  • Cultural Misalignment: Without thorough vetting, you risk onboarding someone who clashes with your company’s values or work style, which can erode morale and productivity.
  • Customer Experience: Employees who lack emotional intelligence or problem-solving skills may struggle to deliver the kind of service that builds loyalty.
  • Financial Impact: A bad hire can lead to turnover, retraining costs, and lost productivity—ultimately hurting your bottom line. Worse yet, customers often leave.

What Strategic Job Fit Hiring Looks Like

  • Structured Interviews: Go beyond resumes—use structured behavioral questions to uncover how candidates handle real-world challenges. Don’t be afraid to deep dive into their responses – asking three questions that ultimately reveal the truth (SEE “Hire Amazing Employees,” Chapter 12) (e.g., Tell me more about ….).
  • Job Fit Assessments: Most assessments do not meet legal and scientific requirements for selection use (e.g., hiring and promotions). Use those that assess fit with the job responsibilities and reflect the true whole person: core behavior, thinking style, and occupational interests.
  • Team Involvement: Let multiple team members weigh in to assess fit from different angles.

Don’t overlook issues noted by objective data:

  • Job fit concerns
  • Interest in key job responsibilities (e.g., low interest in financials when hiring for CFO, controller, financial planner, or accountant positions)
  • Issues when conducting due diligence
  • Unable (or unwilling) to answer, “Tell me about your most recent mistake and what you did to correct it?”
  • Patience Pays Off: Waiting for the right candidate feels like it will take too long, but it’s often more sustainable than fixing the fallout from a rushed decision. When you follow a well-designed strategic job fit system, you will find qualified candidates that don’t always make it through an “expedited process.”

Note that using a strategic job fit selection system does NOT lengthen the process. It uncovers those areas of concern before you hire them, which saves you a lot of money, time, and customers! The added bonus … you will keep your top talent too.

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core.