Million Dollar Coaching

How Do You Listen Effectively?

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“If you’re listening to respond, cut people off, or have a ready answer, you’re not listening!” Jeannette Seibly

In creating our legacy and shaping our future, we must learn how to listen effectively. How you listen honors your legacy and the legacy of others. This is critical as you move forward in creating and fulfilling projects, supporting communities that are important to you, and supporting neighbors and family who enjoy being with you.

However, too often we listen through our own filters:

  • Biases, judgments, or assumptions about whether someone’s story “fits” what we already believe.
  • Listening to reply, not to understand.
  • Thinking of the next thing we want to say.
  • Making a quick decision that the person isn’t worth listening to.

The above are examples of not truly listening. In fact, if you have a response ready before the person finishes speaking, you’re not really listening!

Why Listening Matters for Your Legacy

Listening is more than a skill. It’s a way of honoring stories, discerning values, and building meaningful connections. For adults 55+, listening deeply allows us to:

  • Capture wisdom that might otherwise be lost.
  • Strengthen relationships by truly hearing what matters.
  • Shape our legacy by aligning words, actions, and values.
  • Create communities where every voice is valued, and every story has impact.

Other Considerations for Listening in Everyday Life 

  • Attention to detail: Do you notice the pauses, memories, and details that reveal care and intention?
  • Reactionary or calm: Do they respond with patience, or with quick judgment? A calm tone reveals resilience. A reactionary tone indicates they are still dealing with their anger and the unfairness of the situation.
  • Community spirit: Are they positively contributing to family, friendships, or community events?
  • Openness to growth: Even later in life, are they willing to learn, adapt, or grow?

Listening Beyond Words 

  • Consistency between words and actions: Do their stories match how they live? Listen for three examples or themes that reveal true values.
  • Ownership of mistakes and failures: Can they admit missteps and explain what they learned? That’s wisdom worth passing on.
  • Curiosity and initiative: Do they ask questions about others, the world, or legacy? Genuine curiosity signals engagement.
  • Values alignment: Notice whether their personal values resonate with the community you want to build. Do themes like autonomy, service, or sustainability keep surfacing?
  • Communication clarity: Can they share complex life lessons in ways others can understand and carry forward?

 Practical Listening Habits to Build Your Legacy

  • Pause before responding. Silence often reveals more than a rushed answer.
  • Listen for patterns, not isolated statements. One polished story doesn’t equal consistency in how one lives life.
  • Note emotional tone. Calm confidence differs from rehearsed charm.
  • Separate impression from evidence. Write down what you heard versus what you felt. Then, compare. If it’s not consistent, ask yourself: Are they truly sharing, or just talking to talk? Or, do I need to “level up” my listening?

Remember, what you do to honor your legacy and the legacy of others begins and ends with the way you listen.

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Amazon Best-Selling Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Do you want to improve your listening? Do you journal? Contact me, and I’ll send you a complimentary copy of Journaling Prompts: Practicing Deep Listening.

Supporting Gen Z to be Effective Leaders

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“Leadership is not about being the smartest person in the room; it’s about collaborating effectively.” Jeannette Seibly

At a recent business meeting, I encountered a young woman whose leadership energy was undeniable. She radiated confidence, spoke with conviction, and clearly had the drive to influence and inspire. Yet, as the conversation progressed, her potential was overshadowed by two challenges: she believed she was the smartest person in the room, and her emotions often erupted unchecked. These behaviors, if not addressed, sabotage leadership and future opportunities. (Note: Gen Z was born between 1997 and 2012.)

The Promise Gen Z Leaders Bring

Gen Z is reshaping the leadership landscape. They are:

  • Innovative thinkers who embrace technology and fresh ideas.
  • Fearless voices willing to challenge norms and disrupt traditional hierarchies.
  • Authentic leaders who want their work to align with values and purpose.

This generation’s leadership spirit is a powerful force. But like any force, it requires balance.

The Leadership Growth Required

In this meeting, the young woman’s expertise was undermined by behaviors that eroded her credibility:

  • Intellectual arrogance: She dismissed others’ perspectives, assuming her ideas were superior.
  • Emotional outbursts: She interrupted peers, grew visibly angry at senior leaders, and failed to regulate her reactions.
  • Damaged trust: These actions created tension, making collaboration difficult, and diminishing her professional presence.

Several of the leaders in the room questioned whether the young woman had the professional ability (and maturity) to be in the business conversation they had been having.

Lessons for Emerging Leaders

As bosses and leaders, Gen Z’s leadership drive must be paired with emotional maturity.

Key lessons include:

  • Humility as strength: Listening actively and respecting others’ contributions builds influence.
  • Emotional intelligence: Patience, empathy, and composure are essential for leadership.
  • Client and team relationships: Influence comes from guiding, not dictating. People respond to partnership, not control.
  • Professional presence: Credibility grows when passion is expressed with respect and balance. Using appropriate brag metrics provides influence.
  • Develop a win-win-win mindset: Learning how to create bridges instead of burning them is critical, especially for Gen Zs. They have a long career ahead of them. They will never know when the person they dissed or company leader they offended is in a position to hire or promote them, or do business with their company. While they may say they “don’t care,” someday, they will.

Guidance for Mentors and Coaches

Seasoned professionals play a vital role in shaping Gen Z leaders now and in the future:

  • Offer constructive feedback that redirects energy without diminishing confidence.
  • Model calm collaboration so younger leaders can see composure in action.
  • Create safe learning spaces where mistakes become opportunities for growth rather than career‑ending missteps.
  • Offer workshops and other training (e.g., videos) where the person can learn how to offer ideas without dominating the conversation or alienating others. Providing a job fit assessment leadership report can also provide important insights.

A leadership spirit is a gift. But without humility and emotional intelligence, it will cause self‑sabotage. The young woman I met has the raw talent to succeed, but her journey will depend on whether she learns to balance confidence with respect, and passion with patience.

For Gen Z leaders, the challenge is not just to step forward boldly, but to grow wise enough to make your leadership sustainable and be coachable.

Very Important Note: Having coached and mentored a number of people who are now older and more experienced, many-faced similar challenges early in their careers, including being fired. I strongly encourage bosses and leaders to provide counsel that helps these individuals strengthen their people, communication, and facilitation skills. Doing so ensures you won’t lose their drive, innovative ideas, and fearless voices, and in turn, these individuals will continue to grow, contribute, and thrive.

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core.

Do you have employees that need help with their leadership, communication, and decision-making skills, including Gen Z? It’s time to contact me and develop a program that supports everyone’s success.

Do You Have Problems Working with Authority?

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“If you want to succeed, you must learn to listen to and work well with your boss.” Jeannette Seibly

Do you:

  • Deny having authority issues and place blame for mistakes on your boss?
  • Look for approval from your boss and seldom get it?
  • Ignore advice and instead argue for your point-of-view?
  • Do it your way when your boss or board says, “No”?
  • Have a team that bickers a lot?

Can you imagine NFL team players thumbing their nose at the coach when told to adopt a new game strategy? I cannot either.

Yet, many times, business leaders fail to work well with authority! They believe they know how things should work and fail to listen to sage advice on how it normally works. This closed mindset costs them valuable time, money, and energy that could have been better used for business success.

7 Tips to Improve Effective Working Relationships

  1. Recognize You Have a Problem. Awareness is the first step toward meaningful change. When you cringe because someone sounds like your mom, dad, or teacher, you have a trigger. Heal the relationship with your parent(s) and you will go further faster as a leader.
  2. Learn to Positively Handle Feedback and Criticism. Many times, when you get triggered, it has nothing to do with the feedback. It’s an automatic reaction from your ego saying, “Don’t talk to me that way.” Breathe. Put your feelings into words. Learn to ask questions for clarification. If you truly listen, you will find your boss’s insights (or someone else’s) were “right on.”
  3. Encourage Brainstorming and Listening to New Ideas. When you or your team know-it-all and rely only on past efforts, you will fail to get to the core issue or true solution. Be open to listening to others … it saves time and money while creating viable solutions.
  4. Resolve Conflict Before It Derails Results. Leaders who avoid authority often create unnecessary conflict. Their poor communication styles and inconsistent work ethics make it hard for team members to succeed. Unresolved tension drains energy and stalls progress. Proactive leaders seek coaching and support to address issues early—before they escalate and negatively impact performance.
  5. Learn to Delegate. If you want to achieve true leadership, you must stop doing it yourself and learn to trust your team! To expand your business, sales results, and influence with your team, create a team that is resilient, reliable, and resourceful. That starts with your willingness to listen and work well with your boss, board, team, and customers.
  6. Get Over, “Do It My Way.” Life is not about doing everything “your way.” Yet, there are many stories on social media about DIYers. It takes maturity and experience to work well with your boss, team, customers, business, and bottom line. You will make mistakes. But your ability to learn from those mistakes and seek counsel will improve your results.
  7. Take a Good Long Look in the Mirror. If you are a leader that acts as a lone ranger, be aware your team members will mimic you! While you may believe this is OK, at some point, it will create irrevocable issues at the wrong time! Learn to be coachable and understand there are other workable ways to get the best results.

Everyone has an authority figure: boss, board, team, and/or customers. They that provide invaluable feedback and criticism when you listen. Failure to listen and learn will sideline your career.

© Jeannette Seibly, 2021–2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is a legacy-driven Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Amazon Best-Selling Business Author. For over 33 years, she has empowered thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve sustainable success through strategic hiring, values-based coaching, and intentional leadership development. Her work blends clarity, accountability, and soulful impact—activating performance and purpose at every level.

Take the time to develop effective working relationships, be coachable, and take feedback, while learning from your mistakes. This is can be impossible to do on your own. If this true for you, contact me for a confidential conversation.

Stop Sabotaging Your Work Relationships

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“Want to make a positive difference in your working relationships? Do what you say you’ll do.” Jeannette Seibly

Many bosses and leaders don’t prioritize building proactive, healthy work relationships. They’re often in denial, fail to see the value, or unknowingly sabotage their ability to collaborate effectively.

As a result, when support is needed to resolve workplace issues or navigate complex customer challenges, they’re left disappointed, frustrated, or hurt. Why? Because the co-workers and bosses they ignored or dismissed are now unavailable—or worse, judgmental. These colleagues may respond with, “Here’s what I would’ve done,” or “You should’ve asked me sooner,” rather than offering real help.

Sabine, a mid-level boss constantly complained about her director. Her best friend finally urged her to hire an executive coach. Sabine didn’t believe a coach could fix the problem—especially not the slashed quarterly bonuses or lack of resources—but she reluctantly agreed.

Her coach offered a simple recommendation: “Go have a conversation with your director. Not just any conversation—one that makes a real, positive difference. Start building a better work relationship. You don’t have to like him, but you do need to respect that he’s your boss.”

Sabine snapped, “If I’d known you were going to tell me that, I never would’ve hired you.” The coach replied calmly, “But you did hire me. Now do it. You’ll be amazed at the difference.”

Sabine followed through—and the coach was right. The results were phenomenal. Sabine became one of the few people who could work well with that director.

The bonus? Six months later, the company president called Sabine: “I heard you’re doing great things. When you’re ready, I want you to run one of my new companies.”

Building strong work relationships—especially with difficult team members or bosses—directly impacts your promotability, results, and career opportunities.

How to Develop Better Relationships

  • Listen—Really Listen. Yes, I say that often. But unless you truly listen, the rest of these tips won’t matter.
  • Take Responsibility for Biases and Judgments. You may think no one notices how you really feel about someone—but it shows. In your choice of words, your gestures, your attitudes. In fact, over 80 percent of what you communicate is nonverbal. That’s why it’s essential to challenge your outdated beliefs and improve your communication style. Attend workshops or courses that help you do the work. And don’t just show up—participate. Sitting on the sidelines or pretending to listen won’t move the needle.
  • Respect Others. Stop making excuses for not supporting the team.

Example: If you struggle to hear during Zoom meetings, turn up the volume on your laptop—it might not be a Zoom issue. If you suspect hearing loss, get tested. Excuses erode trust and disrespect your team.

Another Example: Talking over others when they disagree with your comment or opinion.

  • Get Involved. As a leader, stay engaged—especially when your team asks for help or resources. That doesn’t mean micromanaging (unless necessary). Guide your team to take initiative, talk things out, and stay accountable. That’s how trust and results grow.
  • Ask for Help. Seeking input strengthens relationships—ignoring others when you need help will weaken the relationships. Many leaders avoid asking for help until they’re forced to. Then, their egos get in the way: “I already tried that,” or “That won’t work.” Asking for help doesn’t mean you’re not capable—it means you’re open to better ideas, new perspectives, and collaborative solutions.
  • Honor Your Word. Don’t just talk about what you’ll do—do it. Start small. Example: Concerned about 1:1s with employees? Solution: Schedule monthly 1:1s to start—then increase as needed. Many of you believe you have integrity and do what you say you’ll do. When you do what you say you’ll do, you build trust and credibility.
  • Make Win-Win-Win Decisions. Your decisions affect others—even in subtle ways. Poor decisions can quietly derail team progress. To make better choices, hire a coach, ask for input, and listen. Again, listen. That’s how you honor your word and strengthen relationships. Then follow up: Did it work? If not, conduct a “What Worked? / What Didn’t Work?” review to identify what was missing.

© Jeannette Seibly 2024-2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core. When was the last time you stopped long enough to really look at the strengths and weaknesses of your working relationships?  If you have any concerns, let’s talk and put you on the path toward achieving unprecedented results.

How to Work with an Incompetent Boss

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“When working with an incompetent boss, you must set aside your judgment to protect your job.” Jeannette Seibly

Working with an incompetent boss is challenging. They can sabotage your efforts while wasting time and money—for you, your team, and the company. This can happen whether you’re working with your direct boss, your boss’s boss, or a boss you don’t report to directly.

Many times, the boss’s incompetence stems from a lack of self-awareness and a failure to understand their impact on others. They often insist everything is done their way—even when their way doesn’t work. The primary reason they are incompetent is they never learned how to work with a team. And they are often resentful when you know a better way to get results and voice them.

The challenge intensifies when the boss is well-liked or has a strong reputation. So—it’s up to you to learn how to work with them because they don’t have to learn to work well with you!

Even though it might be easier for you to take over the boss’s role to get the job done … be careful … their popularity and ego can hurt you and your future career opportunities if not handled with diplomacy.

5 Tips to Work Well with an Incompetent Boss and Keep Your Job

Diplomacy. This is the #1 skill to develop and use rigorously. Being right, egotistical, or gossiping about the boss’s incompetence will not get the job done. And, if you complain, it will come back to bite you.

Instead:

  • Be an ally. (Even if that seems impossible.)
  • Take the boss to lunch to build rapport outside the pressure of the project.
  • Ask non-threatening questions about their background and experience.
  • Ask how the project is coming along.
  • Offer to do one task the boss is complaining about “to help the person out.” Get it done ASAP.
  • Then ask, “How else can I help you?”

Do It Their Way. The biggest fear most incompetent bosses have is that others won’t do it their way. It’s true—you and others won’t. But to gain their trust:

  • Do it their way the first time.
  • Then offer only one suggestion on how it could be done faster or better in the future (e.g., use a dashboard to track progress).
  • Again, only offer one suggestion at a time—then allow it to be their idea!

Bring in a Respected 3rd Party. You may not have the luxury of waiting for the incompetent boss to “get it.” Talk with your company mentor, boss, or external company coach (if available) about how to best handle the issue. However, the right person (not you) should work with the “incompetent boss” and use a qualified job fit assessment focused on leadership attributes that can make a positive difference.

  • Stick with the facts when talking with 3rd
  • Understand others may be unwilling to “rock the boat” since it could negatively impact them.

An aspiring young leader, Stephanie, volunteered to work with Tyler, an executive known for being difficult and blaming others. Stephanie asked her coach for guidance. Armed with insights, she asked Tyler if she could shadow him for a day and learn about his background and job. He was flattered. Over time, they built a good working relationship. When Tyler poorly managed a customer project, Stephanie was able to step up. She relied on their rapport to have a frank but diplomatic conversation. Tyler allowed Stephanie to help him and turn around the results.

This type of diplomacy and curiosity can build trust—even with difficult leaders.

Document. Be proactive:

  • Ask at least twice: “How can I help?” or “What would you like me to do?”
  • Document if you did not get an answer or received push-back.
  • Keep it fact-based—stay away from blame.
  • Share your brags with your boss to keep them apprised, especially since it can show up on your performance appraisal.

When All Else Fails, Let It Go. If you’re deeply committed to doing good work, this will be difficult. You probably have a strong emotional attachment to fulfilling the needs of the project. But when an incompetent boss refuses to budge, you must step back—especially if no one is willing to help facilitate the outcome. If you don’t, you risk developing a bad reputation for “not working well with others.” Ironic, isn’t it?

Working with an incompetent boss is common but does not need to negatively impact your job or career. Many times, the experience elevates your skills and it is positively noticed!

© Jeannette Seibly 2021–2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 33 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core. How can I help you navigate the ups and downs of working with a difficult boss?

Being the Driver Is Required to Achieve Results

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“Navigating results from the driver’s seat is more effective than passively riding along.” Jeannette Seibly

We’re upset that change is happening too soon, too often, or not fast enough. The problem? External changes happen due to many factors beyond our control. However, team changes are determined by your ability to move from the passenger seat into the driver’s seat.

I’ve led many new projects or projects requiring new results (e.g., increasing attendance, financial revenues, etc.). Every time, there were many bumps along the way in the form of naysayers, economic challenges, and team conflict. But I learned how to stay in the driver’s seat, even though there were times I wanted to bail! Instead, I worked through my discomfort, relied on team counsel, and kept everyone on the same page. The accomplishment? We did it! We won! We celebrated!

A question I received from a reader was, “How do I put myself in the driver’s seat?” This is a great question that needs to be asked more often!

The answer: Being the driver requires a conscious decision and commitment regardless of the external changes and internal company changes – it sets you and your team up to win!

How Do You Avoid Being Pushed into the Passenger Seat?

Be Uncomfortable. The good news? You’re moving forward. The not-so-good news. You want to stop and feel comfortable again. Allow the doubt, fear, and upset to hang around. Don’t use it as an excuse to get off the road required to achieve your goal. When you give up the driver’s seat, you miss the opportunity to learn the skills necessary to win, succeed, and be a great leader! When you can work through the discomforts, you become resilient, proficient, and achieve unprecedented results.

How can you use these “uncomfortable” times to build a strong team and outcome?

Be Willing to Participate. Being an observer and swooping in when the team seems stuck is not participating. You need to get involved in the creation process, manage differing opinions, and guide your team through the ups and downs. Remember, once you’ve given up the driver’s seat, it’s difficult to get it back and steer towards the intended results!

Find Counsel. Ask for help. Don’t seek advice on social media. While AI may offer an interesting perspective, your answers will come from talking with one or two confidants. Hire an experienced executive coach – think of the person as AAA or GPS — who provides counsel by listening and guiding. Just because you’re in the driver’s seat doesn’t mean you won’t have vehicle or road issues to navigate.

Think as the Driver. How do you keep your passengers (team members) engaged and allow them to periodically drive?

  • Share your experiences of having worked through past challenges.
  • Speak with the result in mind and keep it brief and on point.
  • Be open to brainstorming new ideas when the current ones are not working, but beware of unnecessary detours.
  • Acknowledge initiatives and steps taken by team members, individually and as a group.
  • Be authentic, and know you don’t have all the answers!

Celebrate! Too many drivers fail to honor their team members individually and as a group. It’s called the “rules of the road.” Many are unwritten. Being aware is how you win! Remember that lessons can be learned when experiencing failures. Resilience is reinforced by telling the truth and making appropriate corrections on the map. Conduct a group debrief of what worked and what didn’t work? Celebrate achievements and lessons learned. Create brags! The process honors you as the driver and your team members, too!

©Jeannette Seibly 2024-2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, has guided thousands of executives and business leaders to achieve remarkable success over the past 32 years. Her specialty is delivering innovative solutions for hiring, coaching, and leadership challenges—with excellence and accountability at the core.

Key Factors to Hire for Job Fit and Avoid Costly Loss of People

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“Job fit is crucial when hiring and promoting people to achieve intended business results.” Jeannette Seibly

Did you know: “Employee engagement in the U.S. fell to its lowest level in a decade in 2024, with only 31% of employees engaged?” (Gallup)

I would assert that many employers are unclear about what job fit is and what it is not. Employees who excel in jobs that fit their thinking style, core behaviors, and occupational interests stay longer and are more engaged.

If you are frustrated and annoyed with hiring great people into the wrong job, this article is for you.

Today, many qualified people are looking for work because they are retiring, being fired, being laid off, or looking for something better. Although there are a lot of great job candidates available – buyer beware – it doesn’t mean they will fit well into the job responsibilities of your company. Outdated hiring practices that rely on intuitive hiring, biases, and inappropriate pre-employment assessments will cause you to lose key customers and top talent while hurting profitability.

“Too often, we hire based on subjective reasons but fire for poor job fit.” Jeannette Seibly

What Are a Few Signs of Poor Job Fit?

• Work assignments are late, with a lot of excuses
• Promises are made without achieving the intended results
• Frequent mistakes occur, and the employee misreads what needs to be done
• Conflicts with team members, customers, and bosses
• Failure to listen, incorporate others’ ideas, and develop win-win-win outcomes
• Lack of business growth (sales) or overrun of expenses
• Constant change in direction – they are easily distracted by “shiny objects” or “crystal ball” syndromes

Why Does Poor Job Fit Happen?

• No real objective data collected (e.g., resumes are more than 80 percent inaccurate).
• Rely on intuitive hiring practices that reflect biases (e.g., the job interviews account for 90 percent of the hiring decision).
• Unwilling to improve the selection process, citing costs for improvement and ignoring costs for hiring mistakes.
• Failure to conduct thorough due diligence (e.g., relying on false data, such as name of employer, education).
• Use inappropriate assessments to determine job fit (e.g., overlook validity, reliability, predictive validity, and distortion factors)
• Believe any known limitations can be overcome with training and development. (Forgetting that no one works that hard to be someone they are not. This is a trap that almost every hiring boss/leader falls into!)

What Is Job Fit?

Job fit refers to the alignment between an individual’s skills, experience, values, and personality with the requirements, culture, and expectations of a specific job and organization. It encompasses several key aspects:

1. Skills and Experience Fit: How well an individual’s abilities and past work experience match the tasks and responsibilities of the role. While these required skills and experience may sound good on paper, the job candidate may not be able to use the skills effectively. It’s why valid job-fit assessments are required. When using highly validated and reliable assessments, you gain insight into the real person and their core behavior, occupational interests, and thinking styles.

2. Cultural Fit: The degree to which an individual’s values, behaviors, and working style align with the company’s culture and work environment. A startup or new business venture is very different from working in a well-established company. In a company that requires thinking outside the box, some job candidates may believe they can … but are unable to design and develop sustainable systems or results.

3. Motivation and Interest: The extent to which an individual’s career goals and personal interests are aligned with the job’s duties and opportunities for growth. With changes in people’s work ethic, their career or life aspirations may misalign with the company’s needs and goals. It’s critical to have very clear expectations: PTO, work-life balance, accountability for following up and following through, etc.

4. Team Fit: How well an individual works with existing team members and contributes to team dynamics and cohesion. Are they someone who can work well with others, be coachable, and keep their ego out of the way?

When job fit is strong, employees are satisfied, business excels, and customers keep coming back.

Strategies to Improve Job Fit

• Create a sustainable strategic job fit selection process.
• Get real about what you need and the type of person who can fulfill the desired results.
• Work with a talent advisor/hiring consultant to train managers on interviewing, due diligence, and using the proper job fit assessment. (Each should account for 1/3 of the selection decision.)
• Remember, many savvy job candidates will tell you what you want to hear, and hiring bosses have a low probability of discerning the truth. It’s why objective data is required.

To recap: Using a qualified job fit assessment that meets the validity and reliability requirements outlined by the Department of Labor, conducting proper due diligence, and structuring interview processes to affirm your intuition/gut will provide clarity and are crucial to improving employee engagement, customer retention, and improving the bottom line.

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, boasts over 32 years of hands-on experience. Working with small and family businesses, her expertise guides leaders and bosses to refine their hiring, coaching, and management practices and achieve their intended results. Along the journey, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and numerous six-figure earners, all while championing those ready to elevate their game to new heights.

Grab her book, “Hire Amazing Employees” — it provides overlooked issues when designing and using a strategic job fit selection system.

Communication Styles that Hurt Leadership Effectiveness

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“Good communication skills are required by everyone for a company, team, and project to achieve intended results.” Jeannette Seibly

Between 40% and 60% of conversational utterances are ego-related, focusing on our own feelings, opinions, and personal experiences. This self-centered conversational tendency is even more pronounced on social media, where some 80% of communication focuses on the self. (Wall Street Journal, January 2025)

The Problem: Poor communication is a widespread issue in workplaces today, worsening among leaders and bosses causes preventable conflicts.

Why This Matters: Leaders must listen, engage, and encourage employees. Otherwise, it will impede projects, budgets, timelines, quality, delivery, and other results.

Communication Styles That Cause Conflicts

• Self-Interest Approach: Asking questions just to turn the conversation to oneself (aka BoomerAsking). (Wall Street Journal, January 2025).

• Top-Down Approach: Dictating tasks without explaining “why” undervalues team members, stifles brainstorming, and leads to passive resistance.

• Passive Approach: Avoiding conflict and not asserting opinions leads to unresolved issues and perceived weak leadership.

• Aggressive Approach: Harsh, confrontational communication erodes trust and makes team members fear sharing ideas.

• Manipulative Approach: Deceit and fact-spinning create a toxic culture of mistrust.

• Inconsistent Approach: Frequently changing messages (aka relying on your feelings and indecisiveness) cause confusion and make leadership seem unreliable.

• Lack of Openness Approach: Unwillingness to listen to feedback and new ideas alienates team members and stifles innovation.

• Overly Technical Approach: Using complex language alienates non-experts and hinders understanding.

No one wants to believe that they are using these approaches. But take a moment and really look to see when, where, and why you engage in these bad habits.

How to Transform These Bad Habits

1. Hire an Executive Coach. Even if you need to pay for it yourself, it’s worth every dollar. Poor communication is why many bosses and leaders find themselves unemployed or sidelined. It’s avoidable with an executive coach.

2. Use a Qualified Job Fit Assessment. Understand “why” your thinking style, core behavioral traits, and occupational interests can get in the way of communicating effectively with others. This objective tool is priceless and helps you keep your job! And, when used as designed, can help you get promoted!

3. Develop Strong Meeting Leadership: Leading meetings effectively is crucial — on-site, remote, and hybrid. Work with your coach, take workshops, and watch videos to learn the nuances between mediocre and great meetings. Your communication style will determine the success of your teams’ results.

4. Become an Active Listener and Listen to and Give Constructive Feedback: Attend and participate in workshops, leadership coaching sessions, and other feedback programs. Don’t be afraid to provide quality feedback that makes a positive difference. It all requires good communication skills and an awareness of how you are perceived.

5. Develop Emotional Intelligence. Being mindful is key. Learn when and how to use humor, approach sensitive topics with empathy, and be willing to learn along with your team.

6. Pay Attention to Generational Differences. Older generations may use meetings to tout “this is the way it’s always been done,” making it difficult for newer employees to provide new ideas and solutions. Younger employees may rely too much on social media as “the way to get things done” and fail to understand “fake news” and “sensational podcasts designed to attract ‘Likes.’” It’s up to you to manage these interactions with communication finesse!

7. Train on Etiquette and Expectations: It starts with you! Become familiar with virtual conferencing systems and how to effectively communicate using them! Then, train your team members and others on how to get the most out of these meetings.

8. Be Coachable and Have a Willingness to Admit Mistakes: When you feel insecure about a situation or working relationship, you will tend to dominate the conversation instead of asking for help. Share your experience with brevity and admit when you don’t know something. (It’s a foundational skill required of great leaders.) Hold yourself accountable for implementing the feedback asap.

Good communication skills used during 1:1’s, team meetings, and other conversational moments can be beneficial to everyone … especially you! Remember, a good communication style will avoid conflict and will enhance your team’s cohesion and productivity while achieving great results!

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, boasts over 32 years of hands-on experience. Her expertise helps leaders and bosses refine their hiring, coaching, and management practices and achieve their intended results. Along the journey, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and numerous six-figure earners, all while championing those ready to elevate their game to new heights.

Asking for Help Is Required to Achieve Intended Results

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“Asking for help is brilliant!” Simon Sinek

“Recognizing the value of asking for help in hiring, coaching, and managing challenges shows strength and will contribute to your company’s growth.” -Jeannette Seibly

Too often, people believe asking for help makes them look weak. It creates barriers to achieving intended results and hurts our boss/leadership skills.

When stuck in a working relationship, situation, or strategic issue, we freeze, flee, or change the goal (which diminishes the intended result)—all because we failed to ask for help!

Yet, asking for help is one of the cornerstones of achieving your intended results. With only 10 percent of teams achieving their required results, it’s crucial that you, as the boss/leader, confidently ask for help, use the art of listening, and make the necessary changes!

Why do we hesitate to ask for help?

Lack of …

• Willingness. Ego can be a significant barrier. Leaders should remember that seeking advice is a sign of strength, not weakness.

• Trust. Trust yourself and selectively seek insights from a few reliable people rather than broadcasting your query widely (e.g., social media or more than 2 or 3 people).

• Self-Awareness. Lack of self-awareness can lead to an inability to recognize when help is needed.

Seven Tips to Get the Help Needed to Achieve Results

1. Set Aside Your Ego. Take a moment to breathe and seek advice from the right sources. This is critical. Talk directly with the person(s) who can provide the help! For example, a training expert was asked, “I was told I needed to do XYZ when making a presentation. But at a recent workshop, everyone walked out. What happened, and what do I need to do differently?”

2. Don’t Wait Too Long. Anticipate the need for help early to prevent compounding issues. It’s harder to ask for help once you’ve sabotaged yourself (usually unintentionally), experienced a project failure, or damaged a relationship with a co-worker or customer. Ask for help earlier not later.

3. Listen. The art of listening goes beyond the words and includes asking open-ended questions to uncover deeper insights.

4. Don’t Wait for Clarity. (It seems counter-intuitive.) Seek objective feedback, especially when things seem murky and unclear. And remember, you asked for help. This is not the time to become defensive … you asked for help … this is the time to listen. Share in concise statements: The goal of the project or issue; What has been done to date; and What is slated for the future Then, ask for help: “What do you see is missing?”

5. Be Coachable. Stay open to learning and avoid letting ego and pride interfere with accepting help. Remember, your defensiveness will sabotage your success.

An author told me in a group meeting that bragging was nonsense to her, but then complained of poor book sales. She explained, “I don’t see the value and I’m too busy to learn how to brag.” Yet, marketing and self-promotion determine 90 percent of someone’s success as an author. Even after others chimed in, she refused their help! When you refuse to listen, people will stop helping you and your results will suffer!

6. Make Asking for Help a Habit. Seeking assistance regularly can foster your professional growth and build your leadership credibility. Also, it helps you produce results faster and easier each time while building your influence.

7. Make Your Requests for Help Clear and Concise. Clearly articulate what you need and be open to accepting a “yes” or “no” response. If a person is not available or is unwilling, ask someone else.

Important Question! How do you plan to incorporate these tips into your leadership approach?

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021-2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, boasts over 32 years of hands-on experience. Her expertise helps leaders and bosses refine their hiring, coaching, and management practices and achieve their intended results. Along the journey, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and numerous six-figure earners, all while championing those ready to elevate their game to new heights.

Secrets to Achieving a Successful 2025

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“What are you doing differently to get the results this year?” Jeannette Seibly

A new year has begun! While some of you as leaders and bosses may be excited, others dread it and hope it’s not another year like last year!

What are the secrets to moving forward and achieving a fabulous year?

No, it’s not creating more resolutions!

It’s expanding your leadership!

Keep reading …

Secrets to Expanding Your Leadership

Be Curious. Take time for reflection on what you really, really, really want to achieve this year for yourself! Expand and think bigger than your normal way—playing small and safe won’t get you a promotion, pay increase, or new job opportunities. Expanding your curiosity requires hiring the right executive coach and doing the work!

Seek Feedback. While you may hate to hear others’ opinions, thoughts, and feelings (most people do), discovering your leadership blind spots is priceless. Suggested questions: “When you think of me, what are my strengths?” “What are one or two areas that you would recommend I improve on?” “Anything else you’d like to say?” Remember, you’ve asked them for their feedback. Do NOT debate. Instead, ask open-ended questions to delve deeper if you desire to do so. If you really want to expand your leadership savvy, do this.

Know Thy True Self. Yes, many people believe they already do. Interestingly, they know themselves by how they want to be seen … not by who they really are (and how others see them). In this era of desired authenticity, knowing your inherent strengths and how to work with these traits to minimize weaknesses is important. This expands your influence and encourages others to listen to your ideas.

Seek Resolutions. Conflict and disagreements can create havoc with your team and your future, especially if you’re someone who likes to sugar-coat the issue or deny the issue exists. Your job as a leader is to help others grow and develop. It starts by having people discover “why” there are differences and how to use critical thinking skills. Learn to expand your results and resolve the situation instead of having the focus on someone’s personality!

Develop Good Working Relationships. You don’t have to love your boss or employees. However, you do need to focus on their positive qualities and learn how to work with them for your success. I’ve worked with many leaders to develop and expand this skill — it made the #1 difference in their success.

Dial Up Your Humbleness. Yes, egos have a way of getting in the way of your success! To avoid burnout, ask for help! Use your coach, boss, and team to improve and expand (or simplify) your ideas for workability.

Self-Care. When you feel overwhelmed by people and situations, breathe! Sounds simple but it’s not automatic it naturally calms you down. Take a walk. Talk it out privately with a confidant. Again, be open to feedback that you may not want to hear. Being a great leader requires expanding knowledge, confidence, and abilities.

Hire a Coach. ALL successful leaders have coaches! Take the leap and hire the right one now!

©Jeannette Seibly 2025 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly, an award-winning Talent Advisor, Leadership Results Coach, and Business Author, boasts over 32 years of hands-on experience. Her expertise helps leaders and bosses refine their hiring, coaching, and management practices and achieve their intended results. Along the journey, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and numerous six-figure earners, all while championing those ready to elevate their game to new heights.