How to Use Adversity to Make You and Your Team Stronger

“Want to take advantage of new opportunities? Then, don’t let adversity stop you.” Jeannette Seibly

Like it or not, every team will hit a “wall” when adversity knocks. But remaining stuck or feeling sorry for yourself is not an option. These misfortunes or difficulties can originate from bosses, co-workers, and customers because no one likes change. Some feel threatened by it and will sabotage or block your efforts. Or, it can be due to a company “elephant in the room” no one wants to deal with.

Hoping that the adversity will disappear is a lose-lose-lose strategy! Instead, use your commitment and the team’s resilience to transform a situation, project, and/or relationship. Doing so will make everyone stronger. Here’s how-to-do-it:

5 Tips to Blast through Adversity

Get Real About What Happened. It’s essential to tell the truth. Putting frosting on mud pie and calling it a cake doesn’t change it from a mud pie! When difficulties occur, there is no shame in it. Everyone has experienced failure and unexpected adversity. Adversity can be due to a lack of critical thinking, ignoring ideas, or company politics. Take responsibility and talk with your executive coach and mentor when adversity occurs. Then, take immediate action to get it resolved.

TIP: Complete this exercise with your team: What Worked? / What Didn’t Work? This exercise will have you and your team focused on the facts of what worked and the lessons learned. It will also infuse objectivity into the conversations you need to have with others. This process is a precursor to moving through adversity powerfully.

Develop Emotional Intelligence (EI). It can be challenging to see a situation from another’s point of view when you are emotionally attached to being right. Ask questions. Listen and learn. Now build a bridge between where you are now and the goal you and your team intend to achieve.

TIP: To develop EI, talk with your executive coach or therapist and do the inner work to acquire the critical skills needed.

Utilize All Team Members Based on Their Strengths. There are times adversity occurs due to mistakes made by team members assigned the wrong jobs. Instead of relying on your favorite team member(s) to tell you what you want to hear, give assignments to the best-qualified person.

TIP: Use a qualified job fit assessment to clarify each team member’s thinking style, core behaviors, and primary interests. This information opens new opportunities to develop each and every team member, utilize their strengths, and reduce mistakes.

Be Responsible for What You Are Saying and Sharing. Today’s focus on transparency can backfire when you share too much and publicly blame others. Your relationships can be damage and other will stop trusting you. Straight talk is key. Include diplomacy and kindness to ensure everyone is willing to listen and get on the same page with you.

TIP: Keep a private journal and write down your thoughts and feelings. Not everything needs to be shared with others!

Practice Thanks! Everyone loves being appreciated. Saying “please,” “thank you,” and “great work” is critical. When done authentically, your teams’ confidence grows, and your customers feel valued. Appreciation is especially essential during and after working through adversity of a difficult situation. Be generous with your appreciation!

TIP: For one week count, how many times you appreciate someone. The following week double it. You’ll be surprised by the elevated confidence of your team. And, this is really easy to do!

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021-2022

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about using adversity to make you stronger: Big goals will cause adversity since most people don’t like change! Ask yourself, “Am I willing to do the work required?” Then, have the right conversations with the right people to move the project forward. What adversity are you dealing with? Are you willing to get unstuck? Need someone to listen? Let’s Chat!

Self-confidence can be developed even when dealing with adversity. However, it takes a commitment to yourself to address “lessons being learned” and not shy away from them. Grab your copy of the 9 tips needed to develop the self-confidence you’ve always wanted (FREE).

Leaders Today Must Increase Trust to Reduce Workplace Stress

“Building trust as a leader requires a daily practice of mindful awareness.” Jeannette Seibly

Many leaders today are uncertain and confused by what they need to do to keep top talent.

The key is to be a trustworthy leader. When you are, you will reduce the workplace stress on your team members. They can trust you to not over-react to mistakes … be fair when handling conflict … and, support them in developing skills for their next job or career.

Employees in high-trust organizations are more productive, have more energy at work, collaborate better with their colleagues, and stay with their employers longer than people working at low-trust companies. They also suffer less chronic stress and are happier with their lives, and these factors fuel stronger performance. Harvard Business Review

How to Build Trust and Reduce Stress

  1. Have Compassion. Empathy, optimism, and understanding can go a long way towards building trust. Team members will know that you care by what you say and do. Remember, over-the-top optimism can backfire … be positive without becoming a Pollyanna.
  2. Develop Mindful Awareness. Subtle gestures, words, and tone of voice (aka microaggressions) can diminish trust fast! Hire an executive coach to guide you in developing a positive and diverse workplace culture.
  3. Build Credibility. Use brags, share acknowledgments, and encourage the self-promotion of team members. This encourages them to trust their successes and understand the impact they have on others. In turn, they will trust your leadership.
  4. Self-Care. Take care of yourself. This may be the one area that is most often overlooked. When you take care of yourself, you set a positive tone for team members to develop trust in you as their leader. In turn, the team will relax, take better care of themselves, and create a health-focused workplace culture.
  5. Talk Straight. Conversations that make a positive difference are focused on feedback needed to achieve objectives and results.  Listen! Ask questions! Get them talking! These conversations are also “trust-building” opportunities to show that you are “there for them!”
  6. Walk the Talk. Practice doing what you say. If you’re a stickler for having team members arrive at meetings on time and prepared, you need to do so too.
  7. Be Fearless. Resolve conflicts or poor teamwork habits NOW. Your team members are watching to see if and how you’ll resolve these workplace saboteurs. How you handle these situations will either calm their stress levels or have them send out resumes.

©Jeannette Seibly 2021 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has guided the creation of three millionaires and countless 6-figure income professionals for almost 30 years. Her brags include being an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker. Recently, she became an Amazon Bestselling author of her first novel, The Old Wooden Rocker. Have questions? Need a speaker or facilitator? Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A Note from Jeannette about becoming a trustworthy leader. Trust is more important today than ever. If you’re a trusted leader, then team members’ stress levels will be low. But you need to develop “trust” over time and do the right things the right way each time. If you don’t, trust will disappear. Are you uncertain how to get started? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Frequent Conversations Are Required to Achieve Intended Results

“Frequent conversations that are productive stay focused on moving forward.” Jeannette Seibly

Have you ever wondered why we need frequent conversations to achieve intended results? Especially, if you’re a leader with too many demands.

Due to many team members working from home and frequent changes in business, staying focused and staying in communication can be hard.

And, the best way to keep everyone focused on the objectives and key results is through frequent conversations. It encourages progress, keeps everyone productive, and allows for innovative ideas.

How to Have Conversations that Achieve Intended Results

  1. Meet Weekly. When working on any project, meet every week. This encourages team members to get their work done and keeps everyone focused on the objectives and key results.
  2. Keep Meetings On-Point. Put together a short agenda. Review before starting the meeting. Remember, general meetings are a time to keep everyone updated, not a time to tell someone how to do their work. Effective meetings focus on the who, what, when, where, and why of a project.
  3. Use Check-Ins. Instead of meeting with the whole team, meet 1:1 with the team leader and/or team members to stay updated. Also, this is a good way to address specific issues and get resolutions faster.
  4. Create Accountability. At the start of each project, no matter how big or small, create the goal and milestones. Once done, assign each team member to their area of expertise to manage. Now, as a leader, have frequent conversations to review progress and stay updated on any changes.
  5. Stay in Communication. When a team member becomes confronted by an issue, don’t allow the person to isolate. It’s important for everyone to rally together as a team by using straight-talk conversations to help members move forward. And, if the issue is of a personal nature, offer assistance.
  6. Listen to Learn. Instead of listening to rebut (which most of us do), listen to learn. Ask questions. Don’t be afraid to request examples (e.g., show me). This keeps lines of communication open and avoids surprises.
  7. Brag! It’s meaningful to acknowledge each and every person with kudos and congrats on the steps taken and the results achieved. When you sincerely acknowledge someone, your results will magically improve!
  8. Give Meaningful Feedback. Instead of saying, “This needs improvement.” Say, “There are a couple of things I would recommend changing. Can I share them with you?” Then, keep it simple and on-point. Don’t tell them how to do it (unless they ask). Also, be open to their feedback regarding the changes you have asked to be made.
  9. Develop Trust. Trust is critical. It starts with straight talk. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. During the past 29 years, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and countless 6-figure income professionals. Her brags include being an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker. Do you have questions? Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A Note from Jeannette about having frequent conversations to achieve intended results. With many team members working remotely, it’s important for you to have frequent conversations with team members. If you don’t, it will negatively impact achieving intended results. If you want to learn how to manage conversations with a diverse and remote workforce, contact me for a confidential conversation. Your team and customers will thank you!

 

Get Unstuck and Find Clarity to Pursue Career Opportunities that Fit

“Being stuck in a job that doesn’t fit you doesn’t mean you should leap to the next one.” Jeannette Seibly

There’s been a great awakening during the past year for many workers. Work and business as usual no longer exist … The Great Resignation (Google for additional info) has occurred because many now value and are prioritizing their time, family, and life pursuits. The problem? Many remain stuck trying to figure out what they’d like to do. When you gain clarity, you will be able to pursue career opportunities that fit your talents and honor your newfound values.

Millie was fired from her job for no clear reason. For the next 7 years, she felt stuck. Because of her past successes, the first thing she decided was to become an entrepreneur. She started a company, but it failed because the work requirements didn’t line up with her desire to have more free time and do things her own way.

After this failure, she took any type of job she could find for the next few years. She also took free online assessments and listened to motivational techniques, but felt even more stuck and less clear about what she wanted to do with her career.

Finally, after all those years, she took the advice from a trusted friend. She hired an experienced coach and took a qualified job-fit assessment. With her new clarity and commitment, she quickly found a job she enjoyed.

Her comment, “Wow! The truth is, finding work that fits my values and talents isn’t hard … but it does require coming down to reality and developing clarity about jobs that fit me.”

Note: Millie represents many people I’ve worked with over the years that became resigned and stuck after leaving successful and unsuccessful jobs.

4 Tips to Get Unstuck, Find Clarity, and Confidently Move Forward

Talk It Out. Share your concerns with only a few trusted people and your executive coach. Too many opinions keep you stuck. First, complete this exercise by focusing on your career to date, “What Worked?/What Didn’t Work?” Second, share selected results with a trusted listener. Listen to the feedback and ask, “What do you hear?” and “What do you recommend?” Get into action immediately!  Critical note: Stay out of the common traps of overthinking it, believing what they did will work for you, or, grabbing on to every new idea presented!

Get Your Brag On. Many of us have no awareness of the results and the positive impact we’ve had during our careers to date. It keeps you playing small in your career and not pursuing jobs you’d enjoy. Use the five steps outlined in the book, The Secret to Selling Yourself Anytime, Anywhere: Start Bragging! These steps awaken awareness of your talents and build confidence in “selling you” to win new career opportunities.

Write It Out. Every job … no matter how well it fits you … will have times when projects, situations, and/or relationships become murky and confusing. Before you do anything, stop! Breathe. Take the time to write by hand your thoughts, feelings, and commitments to gain a broader perspective (e.g., no one is perfect and you cannot win every sale). Another way to gain clarity is by writing with your less dominant hand (e.g., if you write with your right hand, use your left hand). Ask a question. See what answers pop up. Now, take action to move forward with your new clarity (e.g., it’s better to work well with others than be right about how it should be done).

Hire the Right Coach. There are 100’s of coaches that promise you results. The key is to find the right one for you. Be sure to use a qualified job fit assessment to clarify why some professions are good fits for you, and why others are not (e.g., not everyone should be a financial planner or insurance agent or tech consultant, etc.).

©Jeannette Seibly, 2011-2021

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. During the past 29 years, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and countless 6-figure income professionals. Her brags include being an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker. Do you have questions? Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about getting unstuck. We all experience being stuck about figuring out what is the right career or job for us. Today, over 85% of workers are in jobs that don’t fit them. (It’s shocking, right!?) That has created The Great Resignation with many quitting their jobs. The problem? Too many leave without a plan and then stay stuck! The answer? Ask for help, listen, and take the right actions before taking the leap. Need help finding clarity? Contact me for a confidential conversation now.

Do You Have Problems Working with Authority Figures?

“If you want to get ahead in your career, you must learn to listen to and work well with your boss.” Jeannette Seibly

Do you:

  • Ignore advice and only argue for your point-of-view?
  • Do it anyway when your boss or board says, “No?”
  • Have a team that bickers a lot?
  • Deny having authority issues and place blame for mistakes on your boss?
  • Look for approval from your boss and seldom get it?

Can you imagine NFL team players thumbing their nose at the coach when told to adopt a new game strategy? I cannot either.

Yet, many times, business leaders fail to work well with authority figures! They believe they know how things should work and fail to listen to sage advice. This mindset costs them valuable time, money, and energy that could have been better used for business growth.

7 Tips to Improve Effective Working Relationships  

  1. Recognize You Have a Problem. “You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge.” (Dr. Phil) When you cringe because someone sounds like your mom, dad, or teacher, you have a trigger. Heal the relationship with your parent(s) and you will go further faster as a leader.
  2. Positively Handle Feedback and Criticism. Many times, when you get triggered, it has nothing to do with the feedback. It’s an automatic reaction from your ego saying, “Don’t talk to me that way.” Breathe. Put your feelings into words. Learn to ask questions for clarification. If you truly listen, you will find your boss’s insights (or someone else’s) were “right on.”
  3. Encourage Brainstorming and Listening to New Ideas. When you or your team know-it-all and rely on past solutions, you will fail to get to the core issue. Be open to listening to others…it saves time and money while creating viable solutions.
  4. Resolve Conflict Before It Diminishes Your Results. Authority avoidance leaders create lots conflicts. They have poor communication styles and work ethics, making it difficult for team members to succeed. Remember, successful leaders have coaches to help them resolve conflicts before they are no longer manageable.
  5. Learn to Delegate. If you want to achieve true leadership, you must stop doing it yourself! To expand your business, sales results, and influence with your team, create a team that is resilient, reliable, and resourceful. That starts with your willingness to listen and work well with your boss, board, team, and customers.
  6. Get Over, “Do It My Way.” Life is not about doing everything “your way.” Yet, there are many stories on social media about DIYers. It takes maturity and experience to work well with your team, customers, business, and bottom line. You will make mistakes. But your ability to learn from those mistakes and seek counsel will improve your results.
  7. Take a Good Long Look in the Mirror. If you are a leader that acts as a lone ranger, be aware your team members will mimic you! While you may believe this is OK, at some point, it will create irrevocable issues at the wrong time! Learn to be coachable and understand there are other workable ways to get the best results.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker for over 28 years. Her focus is getting leaders and their teams unstuck and able to achieve dynamic results. Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation. 

A note from Jeannette about being an authority avoidance leader. Everyone has a boss, board, team, and/or customers that provide feedback and criticism. Failure to listen and learn will sideline your career. Take the time to develop effective working relationships, be coachable, and take feedback, while learning from your mistakes. If this sounds too difficult, contact me for a confidential conversation.

Create a Results-Producing Customer-Focused Culture

“If you want to create a customer-focused culture, you must start by being accountable for the results!” Jeannette Seibly

As a leader, creating results-producing, can-do customer-focused teams requires being accountable! You must develop laser-like attention to hiring, coaching, training, and managing your team and team members. If you don’t, you will create a chaotic workplace culture, and customers will fire you and seek out your competition!

Many leaders operate as elite helicopters flying at 30-feet above the action. While they are hovering, they fail to plan for and handle important details. They tend to cause team conflicts and they are often considered a difficult team leader!

Remember, it’s not business as usual! It’s time to get real before you lose customers and top talent!

5 Required Tips for Creating a Results-Producing, Can-Do Customer-Focused Team

  1. Promote the Right Bosses! Yes, it starts here! Stop promoting people that are not already exhibiting good people management skills. Instead, create a separate career ladder for them that recognizes their strengths. Otherwise, they will become toxic bosses and top talent will leave! Your customers will leave with your top talent!
  2. Hire Right the First Time. Use data-driven, objective, and consistent information to select the right people for the right jobs Regardless of what job candidates tell you about their experiences, use the right tools to ensure they fit your job requirements. Hiring great team members will attract top talent and great customers too! Your customers will thank you since they don’t have to keep training new employees that soon leave!
  3. Create Company Values that Inspire. It’s not business as usual. You must set aside your ego and remember your team members are watching and emulating what you do! Dust off the company mission and value statements. Get your executives and bosses onboard and trained! Your customers seek vendors and service providers to give them what they requested the first time!
  4. Value Learning and Development. Creating a customer-focused workplace culture starts with you. Are you holding your teams accountable for meeting customer needs and achieving intended results? Are you ensuring all workshops, online and on-site, include all employees, bosses, and executives as participants? Are you including the right training? Must have training includes: Inclusion, Conducting effective meetings, Critical thinking, True brainstorming, Alignment, and Achieving intended results.
Are you holding your teams accountable for meeting customer needs and achieving intended results?

Your customers value teams that are working on the same page at the same time!

  1. Expand Your Team’s Mindset. Life and work experiences, education, and other beliefs create a person’s mindset. It influences how you and your team members interact with customers and each other. Your job as the leader is to hold your team members accountable for fulfilling the customers’ needs. Your customers experience value by what you do and how you do it!

©Jeannette Seibly 2021

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker for over 28 years. She is an expert in guiding leaders and their teams to get unstuck and achieve dynamic results. Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

Do you want your team to be part of the elite 10% that achieves intended results? MUST READ! “7 Reasons Why Teams Don’t Resolve Conflict”  Reason #2 is especially important!

A Note about Creating a Results-Producing Customer-Focused Culture from Jeannette. Do you consider yourself the type of leader that operates like an elite helicopter flying at 30-feet above the action? Do you know that by hovering, you fail to plan for and handle important details? Do you know you also become a difficult team leader? If you want to inspire your teams to produce intended results,  contact me to start a confidential conversation.

Are Your Mental Abilities Feeling Foggy?

“A new challenge emerging from the pandemic is not recognizing people, things, and situations as we remember them.” Jeannette Seibly

A couple of weeks ago I called a consultant who does HR work. We’d talked off and on for the past 18 months about using assessments. He had several clients that needed to resolve management issues. In the meantime, he had introduced me to a new client needing to hire someone. The last time we talked was in December 2020. I called him a couple of weeks ago to follow-up. He told me, “I don’t know who you are, and I remember faces.”  

Whoa! What a surprise. He was sure we’d never spoken with each other before. I painted a picture of our call in December. His response was, “I receive 116 emails daily.” So, I sent an email for a Zoom meeting, but doubt I will hear back from him.

You are not alone if you have had a similar experience. If you’re in sales, business development,  management consulting, or leading virtual teams, you are more likely to face this new challenge for remembering people, completing normal tasks, and recalling specific points during a conversation. Many find they are “not functioning with normal mental quickness or struggling to find the right word.” (Why Your Brain Feels Broken, NYTimes Parenting)

Also, there are the memory challenges experienced by people who are COVID long-haulers, working baby boomers, and people multi-tasking instead of listening. Additionally, mental health challenges (e.g., depression, anxiety, and stress), can lead to false memories too. (PsychologyToday.com)

As you physically go into offices and business meetings, you must interact with people as they are today, not as you remember them from over a year ago! People change. These changes will impact conversations and situations since perspectives have changed too.

Some of you will even question your own memory if you failed to listen and allowed distractions!

7 Tips to Create Mental Clarity

  1. Paint a Picture. If someone says, “I don’t remember …” or they appear not to remember, paint a picture of the last conversation. Describe where you were. Include any unusual situation (the coffee shop didn’t sell tea). Stay factual.
  2. Offer Your Name. Don’t play the guessing game. This will leave someone frustrated or upset they can’t remember. Instead, give them your name, business focus (10 words or less), and a quick overview of your last interaction. If you don’t remember your last interaction, start fresh and have a conversation about today.
  3. Stay Focused by Putting Away Distractions. “A lot of people think they are good at multi-tasking. The sad truth is they are not.” (Dr. Sanjay Gupta, author of Keep Sharp: How To Build a Better Brain at Any Age) If you multi-task during discussions, you will miss hearing important information and feel lost in future conversations. Some of you will even question your own memory if you failed to listen and allowed distractions!
  4. Send an Email. Recap and outline three key points. Do this before a scheduled meeting to get both of you on the same page faster. Be aware, if the person remembers it differently, ask for his/her version. Again, stick with the facts.
  5. Listen Anew. Put aside what you believe you already know or remember about the person, thing, or situation. Remember, you can be right or you can be effective. Instead, build a new bridge from yesterday to today by listening and being curious. It’s a great opportunity to create a “new normal.”
  6. Exercise, Eat, and Stay Active. This keeps your brain sharp. Sudoku, jigsaw puzzles, and word games are several ideas to help keep your brain active. Eat a healthful diet and get up from your desk every hour and move for a few minutes. (Gupta)
  7. Remember to breathe when you feel agitated, frustrated, or you’re struggling to remember a word, phrase, or person! This is a simple and effective technique. It calms your brain from its automatic reaction of fight, flight, or freeze. Also, it reduces your stress of having to get it right and calms you so you can be present during the current conversation.

 ©Jeannette Seibly 2021

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker for over 28 years. She is an expert in guiding leaders and their teams to get unstuck and achieve dynamic results. Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

Want to know what egos and team results have in common? Get your answers by click here.

A Note about Feeling Mental Fogginess from Jeannette. “At the University of California Irvine, research is beginning on how the lockdown has affected people’s memories. It’s been reported that even some of those amazing people who usually remember events like buying a cinema ticket 20 years earlier because they have highly superior autobiographical memory are finding they are forgetting things.” (BBC) The bottom line is, be kind to yourself and to others when memories are not clear as usual. If you want clarity on how to build a bridge from yesterday to today when talking with people, contact me to start a confidential conversation.

How to Optimize Trust When Saying “No”

“Saying no is less hurtful than saying yes and not delivering on your promise.” Jeannette Seibly

Many of you have learned the hard way that saying “yes” doesn’t always work. When you overcommit, it can come back to hurt your career, business growth, and customer relationships. There can be consequences and the most important is you break “trust.”

There are times it’s better to say, “no.” Yet, saying “no” can feel uncomfortable, especially for people-pleasers and those wanting to be well-liked.

If you say “yes” and are unable or unwilling to honor your commitment, trust is broken. It can become a career derailer when your team, boss, board, and/or customers stop trusting you.

As always, be selective and wisely choose when to say “yes” and when to say “no.”

How to Say “No” and Build Trust

When You Are Asked for Help. As a leader or entrepreneur, it’s your job to guide your team members. If you say “yes” and don’t follow-through, you lose trust. If you say “no,” you can instead recommend who or how they can get their questions answered by someone who is better qualified.

Don’t Offer Excuses. When you say “no,” it does not require an explanation. Offering excuses for the “no” is where many leaders (and others) get themselves in trouble. Instead, plan to negotiate requests that are important to create a win-win-win outcome.

For example, Sabrina was asked to work on a company-wide project for her boss. Because she didn’t have time she said “no.” Instead, she negotiated with her boss to do her part of the project remotely and attend monthly updates instead of weekly update meetings.

There are times it’s better to say, “no.”

When Invited to an Event or Provide a Financial Contribution. Be clear about your values (e.g., family, career, education, religion, etc.). It makes it easier to say “yes” or “no” to these types of requests. When you need to say “no,” here are some effective ways:

  • “No, thank you. I’d love to, but I’m unable to do so right now.”
  • “Thank you for asking and “no” I’m not able to do so.”
  • “Thank you for asking, but that doesn’t work for me right now.”

When You Don’t Have the Time or Interest. When you say “no,” include “That’s a great idea! But I don’t have the time or energy to add one more thing to my schedule. Good luck!”

When You Do Say “Yes.” Honor your “yes” by completing your commitment as promised and make sure to over-deliver. When you can say “yes” and you can say “no’s” to future requests, you will build trust with others.

©Jeannette Seibly 2020

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning executive coach and keynote speaker for 28 years. She is an expert in guiding leaders and their teams to get unstuck and achieve dynamic results. Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A Note About “Saying No” from Jeannette. Saying “yes” can be too easy for many people. Yet, there are consequences when you don’t fulfill the promise you made with your “yes.” Learn how to say “no” diplomatically. That actually will help your career or business. Hire a coach to talk you through the pros and cons of “yes” and “no.”

3 Bad Habits You Need to Break to Be a Confident Leader

 

Leaders today are facing new challenges. Remember, it’s important to build true confidence in yourself and others during this time.

Building your confidence today and inspiring confidence in your team is critical! And, given what’s going on in the world, it’s even more important now.

What inevitably gets in the way of being a confident leader? Your bad habits.

Due to all of the uncertainty, as a leader, you are under more pressure than ever before. Now, is when your leadership habits…the good, not-so-good, and bad…can either support you and your team achieving great results or not.

It’s Critical You Breakthrough These 3 Bad Habits

  1. Poor Listening Skills. This #1 bad habit will sabotage your results!   

A leader had a bad habit of checking his emails and texts during meetings. He insisted he was only multitasking and could hear everything being said. He failed to understand the human brain is wired for one activity at a time. (Multi-tasking is a myth!) It wasn’t until he missed hearing critical information that he learned this lesson the hard way. Even after the team member repeated himself, he failed to understand or question the significance of it. As a result, the budget was exceeded and timeline was missed.

Always listen as though your results (and career) depend on it…because they do!

  • Lack of Awareness. One leader constantly found fault with how others did their work. He thought he could do it better and faster. The truth was, he didn’t have the skills to do their jobs. He lacked the awareness of the impact of his comments and did not understand these comments disengaged his team and hurt productivity.  

When someone fails to achieve the required results, it’s time to inspire confidence in your team members, not criticize their work habits. Remember, during this crisis, it’s NOT business as usual.

During ALL conversations stay present and aware:

  • State the intended goal or results in 10 words or less.
  • Listen to each team member’s input and concerns.
  • Work through any push-backs in a win-win manner (think, ethical considerations, workability, impact on others, etc.).
  • Align on the work and completion dates with your team to meet your client’s needs.
  • Provide necessary resources. Remember, working from home is not the same as working from the office.  

Your awareness determines the quality and timeliness of your team’s results.

  • Know-It-All Attitude. A new leader was a micromanager, a common trait of inexperienced leaders. She wanted everything done exactly as she thought it should be done. Whenever a mistake was made, instead of taking responsibility, she blamed her team (and others) for making her feel humiliated and for letting her down.

To break this bad habit, listen to your team members’ ideas. They are working on the front lines and can be resourceful when encouraged to do so. Also, listen from compassion since they are experiencing a lot of frustration, stress, and anxiety during these uncertain times. It’s up to you to inspire confidence in them!

Building true confidence in yourself and others starts inside you.

Remember, bad habits are amplified during a crisis. They will come out and be displayed in unexpected and unwanted ways. Work with an executive coach NOW to effectively navigate through these uncertain times. It’s the mark of a confident leader who inspires confident team members!

©Jeannette Seibly, 2012-2020

Jeannette Seibly is an award-winning dynamic results coach and keynote speaker. For the past 27 years, she has guided the creation of leaders to excel in achieving results. Contact Jeannette today for straight talk with dynamic results. Don’t forget to listen to her podcasts on Anchor.FM or YouTube.com.

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Mindful Resilience is Required to be a Successful Leader

Life.Should.2Note: This is a reprint, originally posted on June 23, 2020. Last week I conducted a Mindful Resilience webinar for the Denver Financial Professionals. Participants shared: “This is very helpful…I love it…Thank you.” Due to so many changes occurring right now in the workplace and in life, I would recommend reviewing the 6 Tips.

What can you do to handle your emotional triggers while eliciting the best from others?

We are all triggered by certain words, facial expressions, and gestures. As successful, resilient leaders, we don’t have the luxury of hanging onto our upsets.

Mindful resilience is when we develop a conscious awareness of our triggers and address our reactions in a positive manner. It’s starts with you, as the leader, taking responsibility for your triggers when they occur so they don’t get in the way. Remember, clarity of what triggered your reactions is required before you can create win-win-win outcomes.

6 Tips to Create Mindful Resilience

Breathe. Remember, everyone gets triggered. The moment you notice you are triggered, breathe in for 5 counts. Pause. Exhale for 10 counts. Repeat this practice 3 times. Why should you practice breathing? Breathing reduces the fight, flight, or freeze stress response triggered in your brain. Breathing allows you to take responsibility for your reactions (aka triggers) and is critical before attempting to resolve any issue.

Have Come-Down-to-Reality Conversations. Team members can hold onto upsets and use them to justify their poor job performance. That’s why you, as the leader, need to be aware of when these upsets are brewing and take responsibility for resolving them before they turn into a major issue. Remember to use straight talk with compassion during these tough conversations.

Get to the Heart or Core of the Problem. When you as a leader inadvertently dis someone or ignore a festering issue, upsets will be covertly expressed. It’s like a mole hill expanding into a mountain. Remember, you are human and you will make mistakes! So, will everyone else. Instead of allowing your ego to justify your actions, ask and clarify what happened with your team member or team, then, talk it out. If you don’t, the upset will become an irreversible issue that overshadows the core problem.

Be Responsible for Your Communication Style (most people aren’t)! When you use words or terminology that others don’t understand, apologize. Start over by asking questions and be curious about their responses. It’s very easy to lose people when you present the same information over and over (think, you’re probably bored). Also, when you’re presenting a new idea you’ve been thinking about for a while, remember, it’s the first time they’ve heard it. Keep in mind, people learn at different rates of speed. Be prepared to draw a graph or show them a specific example. Remember, as a leader, it’s your responsibility to slow down and get everyone on the same page.

Learn How to Forgive, Even When You Don’t Believe You Should. As a leader, you will have arrows aimed at you when team members feel frustrated or upset. But you don’t have the luxury of hanging onto these insults without them impacting your mindset and success as a leader. Forgive those that gossip, criticize, or blame you. While this is easier said than done, remember, forgiveness is for you. Remember, you don’t to say, “I forgive you” to the offender to forgive them. If you do, it may make it worse.

Hire the Right Coach. Mindful resilience requires you to expand your POV. When a sticky situation or political relationship is not going well, talk immediately with your executive coach. Listen and learn. You can make things worse and sideline your career if you attempt to do it on your own.

©Jeannette Seibly 2020

Jeannette Seibly is an award-winning executive coach and keynote speaker.  For more than 27 years, she has been an expert in guiding leaders to excel at working through difficult situations and political relationships. Contact Jeannette to improve your strategic hiring, coaching, training, and managing processes.  Don’t forget to listen to her podcasts on Anchor.FM or YouTube.com.

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