Sales Manager

Do You Have the Leadership Wisdom to Influence Others?

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“Your ability to influence others requires not taking yourself too seriously.” Jeannette Seibly

Often, as leaders, we take ourselves too seriously and lose our ability to influence others. Then, our results suffer, and so do our customers, team members, and bottom line.

How do you know when you’re taking yourself too seriously? When you …

  • Fail to build on ideas and create win-win-win outcomes.
  • Openly disparage others that disagree with you.
  • Exclude people with broader experience instead of learning from them.
  • Defend your limited experience in an attempt to feel better about yourself.

… you are taking yourself too seriously.

Instead, can you …

  • Discuss others’ opinions without being defensive?
  • Take an idea or concept and build it into a win-win-win outcome?
  • Laugh at yourself?
  • See the bigger picture and reframe it into bite-size pieces to get everyone on the same page?
  • Make decisions that balance both the facts and the human interests?

If you answered yes to these questions, good for you! You are on the right track as a leader and influencer. And you’re not taking yourself too seriously.

However, if you answered no to any of these questions, these are areas of your leadership style that can negatively impact your ability to influence others and need development.

Remember, influencing others is essential to effective leadership … not our technical know-how.

4 Key Ways to Influence Others and Achieve Intended Results

When you stop taking yourself too seriously, we create a workplace culture focusing on results, relationships, and meeting customers’ needs. The following four key ways to influence others are critical to that success.

Practice Persuasive Listening. The secret to becoming an influencer is to listen more – talk less! When listening, you must silence your internal mental chatterbox and refrain from thinking about your next response while others are talking. Effective and persuasive listening is one of the top leadership skills required to guide new solutions that might not be readily apparent.

Be Open to Differing Opinions. The fastest way to lose your ability to influence others is when you become defensive, belittle others, or take a stand against others’ ideas. To be an influential leader, put aside your ego, listen, and ask questions or you’ll miss important details required for seamless execution.

Be a Team Player. Many leaders don’t make good team players. To be a great leader and influencer, you must be a great team player! Otherwise, you lose the ability to influence others and the outcomes of any project. Ask how you can help. Roll up your sleeves and get involved. When others make suggestions, you don’t understand or agree with, say, “Interesting. I don’t see how that would work. Can you walk me through the details?” Now listen and learn.

Appreciate Each and Every Team Member. Many leaders have team members they don’t like or don’t value. They allow their personal feelings and egos to get in the way. If you wish to influence others, you must learn to appreciate others and their contributions. Be genuine. Say to your team members: “I appreciate you.” “Great ideas!” “I look forward to working with you!” And, mean what you say!

©Jeannette L. Seibly, 2011-2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about being a leader with the skills to influence others: Listening, developing ideas with your team, and acknowledging others are marks of a leader that positively influences others. Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Your blind spots get in the way of achieving the results you want. Improve your ability to influence others by clicking here.  

When Leaders Get Lonely at the Top …

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“Traditionally, leaders tend to keep to themselves and feel lonely. But today’s leaders need to stay connected with others.” Jeannette Seibly

Many leaders report feelings of loneliness, with more than half believing being lonely at the top hinders their performance, as cited in several studies. Whether they are a boss, team leader, or executive, the traditional design of leadership keeps them apart from their teams.

But given the challenges in business today, it’s time for today’s leaders to minimize this unspoken issue of loneliness and get connected. If they don’t, they will negatively impact results! Leaders need to learn how to connect and communicate with others in a new way. Otherwise, essential cues about upcoming business and people changes will be missed.

How to Minimize Loneliness as a Leader

Number 1! Set Aside Your Ego. You’re not the only leader feeling lonely, and your challenges are not unique to you. Reach out and connect with others without your ego running the show. People will stop ghosting you when you connect and start telling you what you need to hear.

Stop Favoring Top Performers. Although every leader loves their top performers, they often ignore the rest of the team. Focus on each and every team member by meeting 1:1 and acknowledging the small and big successes, individually and as a group. Don’t forget to include your remote team members. This will keep you from being lonely and excite you about new possibilities.

Develop a Strong Team. Strong teams don’t happen by themselves. It requires you to be involved, hire the right people, and encourage everyone to speak up while listening and coaching all team members to deliver the intended results. The process frees you from the office and removes you from putting out all the small fires.

Be Present. When interacting with the team, be present. That requires you, during all conversations, to put away your electronics or stop thinking about other concerns. Being present makes others feel valued and respected while encouraging a robust discussion. This is key to not feeling lonely.

Live a Life Outside of Work. Life is not 100% work. Yet, many leaders have an unhealthy relationship between living to work and working to live. It’s a mindset! Cultivate a healthy one since healthy pursuits eliminate loneliness.

Join Professional, Trade, and Industry Groups. Participate and make long-lasting connections. This is a great way to build a strong network with other leaders dealing with similar issues.

Create or Join a Management Group. Sharing your challenges with colleagues, either within your company or not, is valuable. Remember confidentiality.

Be Part of a Community Group. Join one that touches your heart (e.g., cancer, Alzheimer’s). It’s a great way to expand your social network.

Take Part in Family Events. Be sure to attend your kids’ events … you won’t get another chance. Keep in mind that other leaders will be there too.

Make Friends Outside of Work. Having friends outside of work When the only other people a leader interacts with are work-related, it limits their conversations. And can create problems. Expand your horizons.

Hire a Coach. Feeling lonely is believing no one else understands your challenges. Hire an executive coach (all successful leaders have one) to share your challenges and successes freely. Usually, talking out loud with a committed listener has you focus on what’s next and feel you’re not alone.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about being lonely at the top: This applies to bosses, team leaders, and executives everywhere! Today’s leaders cannot risk being lonely at the top. Instead, they need to minimize this phenomenon and learn how to connect in new ways. Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Many leaders feel isolated from others due to blind spots in their management style. It’s essential for you, as a leader, to uncover them now. Otherwise, you’ll lose important connections with your team, customers, and industry and company leaders.

Stop Quiet Quitting and Create Solutions

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“Boredom results from not stretching beyond your current skills.” Jeannette Seibly

According to Fortune, 82% of GenZs and Millennials are quietly quitting. When I shared this shocking stat with a friend, she talked about a young family member ignored by her bosses! The GenZer would like to take on more challenging work and has often asked for more opportunities. But each time, she continues to be dismissed. So, she quietly quit her job.

As a member of any generation, you can be part of the problem or part of the solution, whether you’re the boss or employee. When employees of all ages feel bored, not challenged, or experience long-term job dissatisfaction, it creates quiet quitting! Remember, problems always have solutions. Left unaddressed, quiet quitting can sabotage your profitability and results too.

Bosses, remember, GenZs and Millennials are our future. Now is the time to train, develop, and coach them to create good work and results-producing skills … not discourage them further.

Two Points of View to Prevent Quiet Quitting

1. First, learn about career blind spots.

Boss: Create a strategic selection system to collect objective, valid, and reliable data for your hiring, job transfers, and promotions, and rehire decisions.

Employee: While you chose your profession for various reasons, you’re suffering because the job doesn’t fit you! Before you keep job hopping, discover your blind spots and focus on job fit. Talk with an executive coach. It’ll save you from career disillusionment and giving up on yourself or pursuing jobs that don’t fit you.

2. Do your homework.

Boss: Stop relying on the interview as your primary source during the hiring process. Using a strategic selection system will improve collecting objective, valid, and reliable data.

Employee: Before taking a job, conduct your due diligence by asking questions of the interviewers and your professional network. Talk about training, education reimbursement, and other opportunities available to grow that are important to you. Remember, you will have many career options during your lifetime … it’s your responsibility to build on these and not blame your employer for your lack of success.

3. Create Depth of Knowledge.

Boss: Many employees hate repetitive work or being micromanaged. Look for opportunities to allow them to make mistakes and learn.

Employee: Ask for opportunities to dig deeper into accounting, human resources, marketing, etc. Start with learning the basics (e.g., math, accounting, sales, hiring and assessment legalities). The knowledge and ability to use this information correctly can promote you further faster.

4. Create a Breadth of Awareness.

Boss: Provide new opportunities for upskilling, reskilling, and training and development as part of your team members’ career path.

Employee: Take an active role in interdepartmental teams addressing company-wide issues. Listen, ask questions, and learn. This helps you develop and use your knowledge and skills to positively impact the company and its clients.

5. Stay Current.

Boss: Provide weekly department meetings and monthly 1:1 sessions. Discuss what’s working, what’s missing, and the resources needed. Don’t forget to include coaching on taking initiative and being resourceful.

Employee: It’s easy to get bored. But actually, it’s easier to make an effort to learn more and expand your knowledge about your current job. It’s up to you to take the initiative!

6. Attend Professional Association and/or Trade Meetings.

Boss: Provide budget dollars and opportunities for employees to attend these events.

Employee: Don’t be shy. Get out there to meet and greet others. Ask and listen to current and future issues in the industry you work in … or wish to work in.

7. Stop Hoping for Job Satisfaction and Create It.

Boss: It’s up to you to provide appropriate initiatives or challenges for each employee to enhance their job satisfaction.

Employee: Hope is not a strategy. Grab your “Brag” book and complete the 5 easy steps. Now, share your brags with your boss and create action steps for what’s next in developing your career path. Yes, you need to take an active part! PS: Use your brags during Performance Appraisals and work reviews too.

8. Keep Learning!

Boss: Provide budget dollars for ongoing training and development. Include online and onsite workshops. Remember, you’re creating the next generation of leaders!

Employee: Your brain loves to learn. Even if you have a degree or trade certification, take advantage of company training and workshops. Primarily focus on skills required for career growth:  emotional intelligence, communication, project management, and leadership. (Yes, even before you need them.) Don’t forget critical, often overlooked education: financial planning, money management, technical certificates (for non-technical people), etc.

9. Hire a Coach!

Boss and Employee: Find the money. Hire the coach. Remember, successful people of all ages have coaches.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about how to create solutions for quiet quitters: The challenge is that all employees need to take the initiative to develop their technical and other skills to have job satisfaction. As the boss, it’s your responsibility to get into action to guide the development of these needed skills. Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Quiet quitters often have unrecognized blind spots that get in the way of job satisfaction. It’s essential for you to uncover them now, before you quit or are transferred or promoted to new positions (remember the Confucius quote: “Where ever you go, go with all your heart.”):  https://bit.ly/BeEffectiveLeader

Learn How to Spot Toxic Future Employees During Job Interviews

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“Toxic employees diminish trust while sabotaging the company, customers, and team.” Jeannette Seibly

A leader recently asked me, “How do you spot a narcissist during a job interview?” He’d just fired one. I shared that they and other types of toxic employees can be challenging to spot. “It’s why using a structured interview approach, and a qualified assessment tool are important to help you spot them.” My recommendations are shared in this article.

Learning how to spot toxic future employees before hiring them can be tricky. However, it becomes easier when you use a well-defined strategic selection system and interview process. The challenge is, listening and not explaining away apparent signs.

“Toxic employees create discord, crush morale and reduce coworkers’ productivity.” (Insperity)

Many toxic workers have the skills to do the job. But due to “you owe me” attitudes, poor emotional intelligence, and not being coachable, they create unhealthy work environments. As a result, they diminish trust while sabotaging others’ work and the company’s growth.

Tips to Conduct Interviews to Uncover the Truth  

Listen and Be Present! You are more likely to spot toxic behaviors and attitudes if you do.

  • They change their story or lie about the facts
  • They answer your questions with questions
  • They are evasive in their answers
  • They tell you what you want to hear and blame others
  • They are always right
  • They make snarky or inappropriate comments

These job seekers may have the job skills but rarely fit into a healthy workplace.

Use a Structured Interview Focused on Job Skills. Their responses reveal their actual ability and interest in doing the work. Use the Rule of 3 to deep dive to understand their responses. Avoid asking about favorite colors, books read, or music they enjoy! Their responses can be misleading and cover up their genuine willingness to do the job.

Ask Interview Questions That Invite Negativity. Allow candidates to share experiences they’ve been coached not to talk about. But don’t ask more than two of these types of questions to prevent true top talent from ghosting you!

Two great questions:

  • “Tell me about a conflict you had with your boss or coworker.”
  • “What did you do when you received feedback you didn’t like from your boss or team?”

Listen for: blaming others, being unable to admit mistakes, or how people “should be.” Or conversely, “I always get along with everyone.” These are red flags!

Use a Qualified Job Fit Assessment. These tools have behaviorally based interview questions to help you uncover a person’s fit with the job. While they are not designed to state if a person is “toxic or not,” the questions help you learn more about the essential qualities the person will bring to the job.

I recently talked with a job candidate for a manager position. The person had an answer for everything and frequently spoke about enjoying conflict and debates with others. While these traits can be great in negotiations, most employees will revolt working for this type of boss.

Don’t Rely on Only One Interview. Many toxic people love to gossip or have other problematic attitudes they can turn on and off. Conduct several well-structured interviews instead of relying on your intuition or gut. During the process, you’ll learn more about the person’s true beliefs, work ethic, and ability to work with and through others to achieve intended results. Use a well-designed strategic selection system and follow it; most toxic future employees are less likely to stick around.

Don’t Dismiss Warning Signs. People’s choice of words conveys their thoughts, feelings, and opinions. Many poor job performers use negative words when talking about coworkers and bosses. They speak as the victim, are judgmental, and cannot empathize. They talk in absolutes: always and never. Don’t overlook their choice of words or explain them away.

Remember, toxic employees cost you time, money, and sleepless nights. A well-designed strategic selection system is a powerful tool to help you avoid hiring them.

Source for this article: Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results!

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about how to spot toxic future employees during job interviews: The challenge is that they often have the skills to do the job. But due to poor attitudes, being self-centered, and not being coachable, they can create unhealthy work environments. Need help upgrading your hiring practices? Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Leaders need to influence others to be successful. But many times, their blind spots speak too loudly and get in the way. For actual professional growth, use objective data to discover your blind spots now, before it’s too late:  https://bit.ly/BeEffectiveLeader

How to Use Failure to Grow Your Success and Opportunities

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“Failure can lead to new successes and opportunities … are you ready?” Jeannette Seibly

Many leaders and bosses fear failure. Why? They want to look good in the eyes of their team, boss, and customers and be well-liked. The problem is that when leaders fear failure, they can become locked in a myopic point-of-view of what can be accomplished and how it should be done. This limits their successes and opportunities. Another result of being fearful is that team members and customers leave.

How to Attract New Career Success and Opportunities

Rock the Boat. Rocking the boat doesn’t mean someone or something has to go overboard! Instead, it means stretching outside your everyday thinking and including your team during this process. It strengthens everyone’s ability to brainstorm, use critical thinking, and disrupt the common limitations that hurt results. The key is to rock the boat without negatively impacting others.

When You Make a Mistake, Own it. What did you learn? Use “What Worked? / What Didn’t Work?”  individually and with the team to develop clarity. Then, share with your boss and customer.

Apologize. This reduces defensiveness when a mistake has been made. Remember, you must address the “elephant in the room” before you can have a straight conversation and make a positive difference. For example, “I’m sorry this project went over budget. Here are the facts about why it happened and what I/we learned.”

Be Proactive, Not Reactive. Mistakes and failures are often avoidable when you are “present” in conversations. Learn to listen with an open mind. Then, ask questions for clarification about the impact new ideas could have on systems, people, and the bottom line. Be a guide for your team to be resourceful, resilient, and flexible when addressing change.

Hire the Right Team. You cannot achieve success alone. Let me repeat that you cannot achieve success alone. And hiring the wrong person for your team is the fastest way to fail! So instead, hire the right team the first time by using a qualified job fit assessment as 1/3 of your selection process. Included will be a coaching guide to develop your team and you and show you how to improve results now and in the future.

Uncover Your Blind Spots. Every leader and team has them. Your ability to recognize and work through them makes the difference between success, so-so results, or failure. Use a qualified job fit assessment and executive coach to move forward faster and with clarity.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about using failure to grow your career success and opportunities: Many leaders and bosses fear failure. They want to look good and be well-liked. The problem is that they become locked in a myopic point-of-view of what can be accomplished and how it should be done. This fear hurts career growth and opportunities for new projects. Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Leaders need to stretch themselves beyond their perceived limitations for professional growth. It starts with distinguishing your blind spots: https://bit.ly/BeEffectiveLeader

When Coaching Is Required to Keep Your Job

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“Smart leaders and bosses hire the right coach before losing top talent and customers.” Jeannette Seibly

As a leader (boss, manager, individual contributor), have you:

  • Had a meltdown when situations didn’t go your way?
  • Used microaggressions to get others’ attention when not feeling heard?
  • Refused to listen to ideas and solutions you didn’t want to hear?
  • Had a tantrum when you lost a client, or the results were less than stellar?
  • Arrived at meetings late and disrupted the discussion with your own agenda?
  • Yelled at your boss when frustrated?

If you answered “yes” to even one of these questions, it’s time to get real and hire a coach to keep your job! Whether you know it or not, your career is now on a limited timetable, and you cannot succeed alone without the right help.

Improve Your Leadership Through a Variety of Coaching Opportunities

Hire the Right Coach. Start by hiring the right executive coach. Not all coaches are created equal or can turn leaders or bosses around. The right coach will guide you through difficult situations and sticky (often political) relationships to achieve your plan and goals while being a resource.

Discover Your Blind Spots and Ensure Job Fit. An essential part of your development and plan is to use qualified assessments that provide true clarity. Use a qualified job fit assessment for an objective leadership report. Also, include a 360-degree feedback assessment. Beware! Don’t get duped by the cheap assessments. These are notorious for not providing objective and valid data. Now, work with your executive coach to create your plan and goals. Remember, implement only one change at a time.

Emotional Intelligence Development. Another vital part of your plan is participating in workshops and programs designed to help you learn how to work with and through others to achieve intended results … including improving your communication skills. Also, consider talking with a therapist to uncover unresolved concerns or issues from your past.

Select an Industry Mentor. Whether or not it’s part of your plan, find an industry mentor. The right one expands your awareness of what is required in business today. Value these meetings by showing up on time, being ready to listen, and learning. But remember … industry mentors are not coaches! So, don’t ditch the coach! Instead, talk with your coach about insights and build them into your long-term plan. (Yes, plan to work with your coach for at least six months to ensure your changes are working!)

Let Go of Emotional Attachments. Last but not least, set aside your ego during the process and be open to making meaningful changes. This can be difficult. But consider the alternative (e.g., being fired, having a lousy reputation, unemployable). For example, if you’re a bad boss, ask your company to make you an individual contributor while maintaining the same pay and perks you had as a boss. If your company is unwilling to do so, find a forward-thinking company that does.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about getting real and hiring a coach to keep your job when you’ve gone off-track: when your employees or customers are leaving or complaining, it’s time for you as the boss or leader to listen and hire an executive coach, pronto! Many times, your behaviors and attitudes will improve with the right guidance. But don’t wait until it is too late! Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Hiring the wrong person for an executive or critical position jeopardizes your company. However, this can be preventable when using a strategic selection system. Get essential hiring and selection tips by grabbing the Amazon International Best-Selling Book,  “Hire Amazing Employees!”

Do You Want to Be a Successful Leader? Learn This All-Important Skill!

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“Do you want to excel professionally and financially? Then, be coachable! It’s the #1 way to success.” Jeannette Seibly

“The paradox is that the very things that hold us back are the reasons we need a coach in the first place.” Seth Godin

Being coachable opens up unimaginable doors and opportunities!

  • All successful leaders and future leaders have coaches!
  • As a result, they develop the skills, competencies, and inner confidence that comes from being coachable.
  • In addition, being coachable uncovers blind spots that get in the way of receiving promotions, special assignments, and acknowledgments.
  • They become an influencer and leader that others want to follow.

What Does Being Coachable Mean?

“Coachability is not a technical skill or an inherent ability. It is a mental attitude.” It reflects your ability to ask for feedback, listen, and make appropriate changes. Learning from constructive criticism is also a reflection of your emotional intelligence (EQ). (mvorganizing.org)

What Does Being Uncoachable Look Like?

You roll your eyes, take things personally, and have myriad excuses for why you don’t or won’t ____ (fill in the blank). You are unhappy being stuck in your career and unwilling to do the right work to change it.

How To Improve Your Coachability!

  1.  Be Open to Learning. While you may want to seek out people more experienced than you, remember, you can learn something from anyone, anywhere!
  2. Seek Out Feedback. Ask team members, customers, and your boss for feedback, and leave your ego at the door! For example, ask, “What’s one thing that would help me improve my project results? Or, ability to work well with others?” Listen and be respectful, especially if the feedback isn’t what you want to hear. Remember to say “please” and “thank you.”
  3. Stretch Beyond Your Beloved Comfort Zone. These confining spaces get in the way of your success! Be willing to ask for help! Ask, “I tried this approach, and it didn’t work for me. What do you believe is missing?” Listen and don’t debate. This helps you discover your blind spots and how to overcome them. Now, do the work!
  4. Be Present When Interacting with Others. It starts with quieting the mental chatter of thoughts and distractions. Then, when you truly listen, you will discover insights between what you say you want and what you are actually doing.
  5. Make Positive Behavior and Attitude Changes. Talking the talk won’t make a difference. You must do the right work! If you don’t know what to do, ask an experienced coach, use a qualified job fit assessment to clarify “why,” and then get in action! (Stop thinking about it and get started now!)
  6. Hire the Right Coach. Successful leaders and future leaders hire the right executive coaches. They find the coach that can guide them to achieve what they really really really want, not what someone else believes they “should” have or do. Also, they select executive coaches that have coaches too! (Yes, coaches need to be coachable!)

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021-2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. Celebrating 30 years of award-winning international executive and family business management consulting, speaking, and coaching. She’s also an Amazon Best Selling Author with essential tips for busy employers! Her commitment has guided 1,000s of leaders to make a positive difference in their businesses. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about why being coachable is so critical: Forbes said it this way: “Many of us have the assumption that someday life will be easy.  … But this assumption that it gets easier is not true. It is never true because you change, the organization changes and the business environment is constantly evolving. A successful life means constant change and continuous learning. So set a goal now to remain coachable throughout your career.” Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Are you tired of hiring uncoachable employees? During the interview, ask: “When was the last time you made a mistake?” and “How did you handle it?” This is perhaps the most critical and revealing part of the interview. Get other tips and interview questions by grabbing, “Hire Amazing Employees!” (Amazon #1 International Best Seller)

How Do You Use Interview Time Effectively?

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“If you continue asking irrelevant job interview questions, you’ll continue to lose talent, customers, and money.” Jeannette Seibly

Many hiring managers believe relying on their instincts, and intuition/gut saves time and gives them all they need to make good hiring decisions. They think they’ll know the right candidate when they meet them.

Unfortunately, there are many problems with this belief. It creates:

  • Unconscious bias
  • Ghosting by job candidates and new hires
  • Turnover of talent, loss of customers, and litigation (think money and reputation)
  • Removal of a bad hire which can take up to 18 months (think again money and reputation)
  • Bad company reputation when making decisions without factual data … (Remember, this job candidate could become a future customer or decision-maker for a sales contract or award.)

Be Clear! Your Goals During the Interview Are to Determine:

  • Can the job candidate do the job?
  • Will the job candidate do the job?
  • Can the job candidate do the job in this company?

When you answer the above three questions in writing, you get real about the actual competencies required. Remember, business is changing, and so have business requirements.

  • What actual competencies are required?
  • What does the right candidate need to accomplish in 30-60-90-180 days?
  • What job fit assessment is best to see the “whole person?”

Example, if you’re seeking a salesperson, does s/he need to generate leads, close, and provide good ongoing customer care?

Preparation is Critical for Effective Interviews  

  • Ask job-related questions (not about the latest book read, hobbies outside work, etc.)
  • Create a structured interview with job-related questions

Review interview questions to ensure they do not create unconscious bias. Too often, we ask about recent books read, movies seen, and hobbies. These can get you in legal trouble. Why? You are inferring characteristics from their responses without factual data.

As you already know, stay away from questions about a candidate’s lifestyle, childcare, age, race, religion, etc.

Example, a hiring manager asked a candidate about the most recent book he’d read. He said, “Jaws.” She refused to talk with him further inferring he was an angry person. (Yes, this actually happened.)

Four Tips to Improve Your Interview and Selection Results

Note: Interviews should be only one-third of a well-designed strategic selection process. The other key parts include assessments (1/3) and due diligence (1/3). (Hire Amazing Employees)

1. Listen to their responses. Hear what they are saying. Don’t fill in the blanks with what you want to hear. Instead, ask questions for clarification before moving on to the next question.

2.Use Rule of 3 to determine the depth and breadth of job experience and skills.

An example of using the Rule of 3 to hire a project manager:

1) How do you handle team conflict? Can you give me an example?

2) What were the results?

3) If I talked with the team, how would they describe your leadership skills?

3. Ask about their coachability, how they handle mistakes, and flexibility with new assignments. Many will respond, “no problem.” Again, use the Rule of 3 to deep dive. You’ll hear their genuine willingness or unwillingness to answer these questions. Their core behaviors seldom change regardless of what they say.

4. Ask for examples. When asking job-related questions, always ask for examples. Example: Tell me about your working relationships with previous work teams, bosses, and customers.

Many years ago, I conducted a final interview with an experienced general manager for a business owner. I learned by asking for examples that each time she talked about her past three jobs, she expressed her upset with the business owners’ demanding ways. When I asked if she was aware of her upsets, she answered me honestly, “no.” I then shared that working with this business owner would be no different … he was very demanding too.   

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021-2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about using your interview time effectively: Many hiring managers rely too much on their intuition or gut, which leads to disastrous results: top talent and great customers leave, and the company’s bottom line looks grim. This week’s article covers the basics of conducting effective interviews. When done right, it saves time, money, and sleepless nights. Have questions? Most do! Let’s chat now!

Are you asking good, job-related interview questions? When hiring new employees or rehiring former ones, ask about their ability to handle mistakes. Why? 90% of new hires fail because they dismiss coaching or advice about how to improve. Get your copy of the newly released, Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results! and suggested interview questions to get you started.

How to Listen When Receiving Advice to Achieve Results

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“We want to realize our dreams, yet, we make it difficult by not listening to others.” Jeannette Seibly

What you ignore is that there is a choice regarding ‘how’ you listen to advice! Jeannette Seibly

Many people love to give advice … solicited and unsolicited. But many people don’t enjoy receiving it, and even when the advice is valid, they fail to use it to improve their issues, situations, or relationships.

The problems with giving and receiving advice:

  • we are overconfident about our perspectives
  • we fail to define the true problem
  • we fear hearing what we don’t want to hear
  • we learn we are not committed to doing the “real” work required

When Jonathan accepted a job to work for a well-respected leader, he looked forward to it. But when he shared the successes of his first assignment, the leader gave unsolicited advice for future improvements. Jonathan felt offended. He’d wanted to impress the leader by succeeding without help or advice.

When he shared his upset with Julie, his coworker, she laughed. “Here’s the deal. You can listen to his advice and run with it. Or modify it. Or, give factual reasons it won’t work. Or, feel offended … and most likely fail. But I would recommend you listen to his advice with an open mind. We focus on delivering great results in this company. Sometimes you may need to put on extra armor like the rest of us when he gives advice … but his style isn’t going to change. And he’s usually right on! It’s always your choice on how you listen. But feeling offended won’t help you succeed in your career here or anywhere else.” 

As results-oriented leaders, your willingness to listen to advice is how your teams and you achieve results further and faster.

How to Listen When Receiving Advice

Set Aside Your Ego. If you remember nothing else from this article, set aside your ego. When you are open to advice, regardless of how it’s offered, you’ll succeed further and faster in your career. Then, stay humble when deciding whether or not to accept the advice, and don’t let your blind spots derail you.

Ask Questions. “Can you please clarify what you mean? I want to be sure I understand.” OR, “Can you show me an example?” Don’t be obtuse … listen and be open to learning. Then, thank them. Now, either take their advice, modify it, or discard it.

Be Coachable. Discuss the advice given with your mentor or executive coach. Even the most off-the-wall suggestion can make a positive difference, or not. It depends on how you listen. Remember, the recommendation could be the catalyst for your success, or it could be naysayers expressing their opinions based on their own experiences. Either way, the advice taken or discarded can become a future powerful story when offering guidance or counsel to others.

Set Aside Being Offended or Annoyed. Being offended is not for professional people. And, being annoyed is something you can train yourself to stop doing. Why? There is usually a gold nugget when you truly listen. But, of course, if someone is deliberately offensive, move on.

Be Prepared When Asking for Help. You’ve seen people overwhelmed when asking for advice on social media. Instead, talk with one or two trusted advisers (your executive coach or a mentor). First, share the problem in 20 words, briefly outline what has been done, then ask, “what’s missing?” Now listen without being defensive. Remember to take notes and take focused action!

Your ability to listen to advice, whether right on or not, will take you further and faster than going it alone. Jeannette Seibly

How to Give Advice that is More Likely to Be Heard

Ask First. Are they open to hearing advice from you? If not, move on. If you’re the boss, ask if you can provide insights into a challenging issue, situation, or relationship they are experiencing. They usually will say “yes” and are now more open to listening to you. If they say “no,” you may need to make an unpopular management decision if the challenge continues.

Limit It. Offer only one or two valid points. If you offer more, you’ll lose their willingness to listen or their ability to comprehend of lot of information. Either use the sandwich approach or the straight talk approach, depending on the person.

Do it 1:1. Use the old saying, “Praise publicly, offer constructive guidance privately.” Always.

Be Open to Taking Advice. When you are willing and open to taking advice, your ability to offer advice and guidance to others increases tenfold.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about giving and receiving advice: If you are easily offended or annoyed when someone offers you advice, it’s time to reconsider how you listen. Successful leaders are open to receiving solicited and unsolicited advice. When doing this, they often move forward further and faster in their careers, in their projects, and in realizing their dreams. Have questions about how to listen when giving and receiving advice? Most do! Let’s chat now!

Are you asking the right job interview questions? When hiring new employees, ask about their ability to handle mistakes. Why? 90% of new hires fail because they dismiss coaching or advice about their poor interpersonal skills. Get your copy of the newly released, Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results! and suggested interview questions to get you started

How to Remove Elephants by Resolving Difficult Issues or Situations

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“When you ignore the elephant in the room, you sabotage your team and their ability to produce great results.” Jeannette Seibly

When elephants are in the room, it means an obvious issue or situation is being avoided or ignored. While you may rely on the excuse, “if you ignore them, they’ll go away,” these elephants have a sneaky way of sticking around and sabotaging results — regardless of your feelings about their importance.

Team members quietly quit when unspoken issues or difficult situations are not vocalized and resolved. Usually, their reluctance to speak up is due to fears of personal or professional reprisals if they rock the boat. Or, the fear is due to not having the confidence, communication skills, or self-esteem to stay in the conversation when others don’t agree with them.

As the leader, it’s up to you to make the conversations safe and respectful and be committed to opening up the conversation to expose difficult issues or situations.  

Ironically, talking about these elephants clears the air, energizes the team, and produces unprecedented results. However, achieving these results requires straight talk and a willingness to stay focused on removing the elephant when it doesn’t want to readily lumber away!

How to Resolve Five Common Types of Elephants

When resistance is due to:

Overwhelm. Keep the conversation simple when the issue seems impossible or too big to handle. Use open-ended questions: “What is your experience with the new A/P system?” Allow others the opportunity to voice concerns without fear. Once everyone has had a chance to talk, brainstorm possible solutions. Now, create a focused action plan and speak directly with the person(s) that have the power to resolve it. Remember to stay focused on the solution, not personalities.

Egos. These can be the most difficult elephants to mitigate since egos involve executives’ sense of self-esteem and self-importance. Offer ideas in small pieces and let them choose which one to use since s/he ignores brainstorming. Then, give them credit when the idea succeeds, and offer one or two suggestions if it fails. Remember, the goal is to remove the negative impact on you and your team. As you gain the executives’ trust, you can have more effect.

Entrenchment. We’ve all heard the expression, “It’s the way we’ve always done it.” When team members offer ideas to resolve concerns, it’s essential to listen and learn and not take them personally. Set aside your ego as the leader, use critical thinking so that change isn’t for the sake of change, and manage the process to include everyone.

Bad Acts. If there is a claim of harassment or microaggression, or allegation of theft, it’s imperative to act responsibly now. Have a private conversation with your boss and human resources to determine how to proceed. This may mean letting a well-liked team member or coworker go. Remember, this elephant is negatively impacting others. And these observers are watching how you’ll handle the situation and are adjusting their work performance accordingly. Note: If you ignore this one, you’ll lose credibility, your team, clients, and your business.

Failure to Commit and Act. There are times when elephants have been addressed, but there is no change. Or the leader has agreed but fails to remove the elephant due to political reasons or is second-guessing their agreement. (Examples include continuing old hiring practices and resisting a needed strategic hiring system or asking a major financial contributor to stop smoking in a no-smoking office.) Get this resolved asap. Ask for help by talking with your executive coach for objective counsel. Stop hoping the elephant will eventually go away. Hope is not a strategy; elephants tend to stay too long when you avoid following through for win-win-win outcomes.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2011-2022

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about removing elephants and creating win-win-win outcomes: Is an elephant residing on your team? With your client? Or, in your company? The longer you wait to resolve difficult issues or situations, the more entrenched these elephants become. In the meantime, you lose essential ideas and solutions along with team members and clients. Have questions about how to identify “elephants” and resolve them? Most do! Let’s chat now!

When employees “quietly quit,” it is often due to you quickly hiring on instinct and then slowly firing for poor job skills. It’s time to develop a strategic selection system to improve how and whom you hire! Get your copy of the newly released, Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results!