Manager

How to Remove Elephants by Resolving Difficult Issues or Situations

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“When you ignore the elephant in the room, you sabotage your team and their ability to produce great results.” Jeannette Seibly

When elephants are in the room, it means an obvious issue or situation is being avoided or ignored. While you may rely on the excuse, “if you ignore them, they’ll go away,” these elephants have a sneaky way of sticking around and sabotaging results — regardless of your feelings about their importance.

Team members quietly quit when unspoken issues or difficult situations are not vocalized and resolved. Usually, their reluctance to speak up is due to fears of personal or professional reprisals if they rock the boat. Or, the fear is due to not having the confidence, communication skills, or self-esteem to stay in the conversation when others don’t agree with them.

As the leader, it’s up to you to make the conversations safe and respectful and be committed to opening up the conversation to expose difficult issues or situations.  

Ironically, talking about these elephants clears the air, energizes the team, and produces unprecedented results. However, achieving these results requires straight talk and a willingness to stay focused on removing the elephant when it doesn’t want to readily lumber away!

How to Resolve Five Common Types of Elephants

When resistance is due to:

Overwhelm. Keep the conversation simple when the issue seems impossible or too big to handle. Use open-ended questions: “What is your experience with the new A/P system?” Allow others the opportunity to voice concerns without fear. Once everyone has had a chance to talk, brainstorm possible solutions. Now, create a focused action plan and speak directly with the person(s) that have the power to resolve it. Remember to stay focused on the solution, not personalities.

Egos. These can be the most difficult elephants to mitigate since egos involve executives’ sense of self-esteem and self-importance. Offer ideas in small pieces and let them choose which one to use since s/he ignores brainstorming. Then, give them credit when the idea succeeds, and offer one or two suggestions if it fails. Remember, the goal is to remove the negative impact on you and your team. As you gain the executives’ trust, you can have more effect.

Entrenchment. We’ve all heard the expression, “It’s the way we’ve always done it.” When team members offer ideas to resolve concerns, it’s essential to listen and learn and not take them personally. Set aside your ego as the leader, use critical thinking so that change isn’t for the sake of change, and manage the process to include everyone.

Bad Acts. If there is a claim of harassment or microaggression, or allegation of theft, it’s imperative to act responsibly now. Have a private conversation with your boss and human resources to determine how to proceed. This may mean letting a well-liked team member or coworker go. Remember, this elephant is negatively impacting others. And these observers are watching how you’ll handle the situation and are adjusting their work performance accordingly. Note: If you ignore this one, you’ll lose credibility, your team, clients, and your business.

Failure to Commit and Act. There are times when elephants have been addressed, but there is no change. Or the leader has agreed but fails to remove the elephant due to political reasons or is second-guessing their agreement. (Examples include continuing old hiring practices and resisting a needed strategic hiring system or asking a major financial contributor to stop smoking in a no-smoking office.) Get this resolved asap. Ask for help by talking with your executive coach for objective counsel. Stop hoping the elephant will eventually go away. Hope is not a strategy; elephants tend to stay too long when you avoid following through for win-win-win outcomes.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2011-2022

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about removing elephants and creating win-win-win outcomes: Is an elephant residing on your team? With your client? Or, in your company? The longer you wait to resolve difficult issues or situations, the more entrenched these elephants become. In the meantime, you lose essential ideas and solutions along with team members and clients. Have questions about how to identify “elephants” and resolve them? Most do! Let’s chat now!

When employees “quietly quit,” it is often due to you quickly hiring on instinct and then slowly firing for poor job skills. It’s time to develop a strategic selection system to improve how and whom you hire! Get your copy of the newly released, Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results!

Not All PreEmployment Assessments Are Created Equal

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“Did you know using qualified job-fit assessments can greatly enhance any company’s selection process? The right ones can provide objective data to ensure employees are productive and are in jobs they enjoy.” Jeannette Seibly

There are over 3,000 assessment tools on the market today. The challenge? Most do not meet the minimum standards set by the Department of Labor for preemployment and selection use.

Why is this important to know?

Many applicants have been well trained on how to be interviewed and how to answer frequently asked questions. They know how to say the right things, make promises you want to hear, and provide great work samples. However, these conversations do not accurately predict what the person can and may do on the job in your company.

Qualified assessments provide objective data and information that most job candidates won’t tell you and may not even realize.

As a potential employer, you only see 10% of the person based on the quality of the resume, interviews, and reference checks. But, if you are like most interviewers, you make many assumptions about the job candidates’ suitability for the job.

What’s missing? Objective data! The 90% that is hidden will provide you predictive information on whether they can and will do the job and do it successfully in your company. Objective data includes qualified job fit assessments, in addition to a well-structured interview and thorough due diligence.

The purpose of using qualified job fit assessments is to get real about the applicant’s fit with the job responsibilities. Jeannette Seibly

What types of qualified assessments predict a candidate’s success on the job?

  • Thinking Style (Can they do the job?)
  • Interests/Motivations (Will they do the job?)
  • Behavioral Traits (Can they do the job here?)
  • Job Matching (Will they fit successfully in the position?)

The benefits of qualified assessments:

  • Provide the highest level of valid and reliable information due to thorough research.
  • Predict success in a specific job.
  • Provide a technical manual* for your review.
  • Verify or contradict your “gut/intuition.”
  • Prevent “biases” from getting in the way.
  • Are tested to be nondiscriminatory.
  • Help you meet all federal, state, and local statutes. (For international candidates, check with that country’s requirements.)
  • Validate the quality of information the candidate is providing: Is it accurate, or what they think  you want, or what they wish they were … or a mix of all three?
  • Used as directed, they work!

*The first step when selecting a qualified job fit assessment is to review the Technical Manual.

To ensure each assessment tool is valid and reliable for preemployment and selection purposes, request a technical manual from the publisher or vendor for the assessment product.

A technical manual documents the research and development required to meet the Department of Labor (DOL) Guidelines (Testing and Assessment: An Employer’s Guide to Good Practices), Equal Employment Opportunity (EEO), Americans with Disability Act (ADA), and other requirements for the assessment to be used for preemployment and selection purposes. It helps you determine if the assessment meets minimum validity and reliability requirements for use in your specific employment location(s).

Beware: some vendors may provide a letter from their attorney stating the assessment meets all applicable laws for hiring and selection purposes. That letter protects them, not you. Do your homework!

So, what questions help determine validity and reliability of a qualified assessment?

The following questions are not inclusive when deciding which assessment to use. These are suggestions to get you started.

  • Does it assess job-related skills?
  • Does it meet all legal requirements for your work locations?
  • Does it have recent validity and reliability tests?
  • Does it provide predictive validity, high enough to meet DOL standards?
  • What are the sample sizes and makeup for those tests (e.g., Is it validated with a large sample of working people, or a small sample of college sophomores)?
  • Is it appropriate for preemployment selection and hiring purposes?
  • Are you planning to use it for its intended purpose?

Note: Just because an assessment is being used for training or coaching purposes and shows differences in people, does not mean that it can be used for preemploy­ment and selection purposes. Not only is using the correct assessment of legal importance, but it also ensures that you are using tools with the validity and reliability required to accurately and objectively measure the person for the job.

Content for this article is taken from: Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results!

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about why preemployment assessments are a must: There are over 3,000 assessments on the market today. Most do NOT meet the Department of Labor’s minimum standards when using them for preemployment and selection purposes. So, what do you need to know, and how do you select the right ones? The information in this article is taken from the newly published book, Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results! Have questions? Most do! Let’s chat now!

Are your job candidates saying, “I didn’t get the job! But I dodged a toxic boss!”? If yes, your hiring process needs help immediately! Grab your copy of newly released Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results!

Do You Include All Members of Your Team?

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“Including everyone isn’t hard. But it takes awareness, skill, and commitment to make it happen.” Jeannette Seibly

Have you ever attended a team meeting and sat with a smile plastered on your face? Then, left with your facial muscles hurting and your energy depleted? This is what happens when you are not included.

Many team members feel this way after attending team meetings. Lack of inclusion during team meetings is often due to cliques, not being part of the leader’s inner circle, or the leader being focused on him or herself.

As a leader, it’s your job to engage each and every person on the team! That’s being inclusive! Because including everyone creates more productive and engaging meetings. It also impacts the quality of results and meeting deadlines. This critical skill creates influential leaders in today’s workplace.

7 Tips to Be Inclusive

  1. Welcome Each Person as they Join the Meeting, Virtually or On-Site. Use their first name (or the name they wish to be called).
  2. Introduce People to One Another. Take responsibility for introducing people to one another at every meeting. Don’t assume team members know one another or feel comfortable socializing without some help. For example, on Zoom calls, allow 15 seconds for each person to give a quick intro. Being seen and heard sets a positive tone for the meeting or event.
  3. Ask for Each Person’s Opinion. During brainstorming and idea generation meetings, give everyone a chance to speak. And provide them with the option to “pass.” I go around the group more than once to ensure everyone has an opportunity to talk. And I almost always get better interaction the second time around.
  4. Acknowledge Each Idea. Say something positive, “Wow!” “That’s great.” “Hadn’t thought about that one.” When you value ideas, others feel comfortable offering their thoughts and insights. Reserve judgment about the quality of their ideas for later. It’ll be evident if an idea won’t work for a project or issue. Yet, I’ve seen the lamest ideas become epic solutions! So, learn patience and trust the process!
  5. Don’t Offer Your Ideas Upfront (as the leader or boss). During proper brainstorming activities, you want people’s unfiltered Otherwise, sharing your ideas first will have team members telling you what you want to hear. Even worse, team members won’t speak up because they are afraid to disagree with you. So, wait until everyone has an opportunity to share before offering your ideas. I use this tactic for every meeting. It’s incredible how this simple approach generates more engagement and better ideas.
  6. Assign Tasks Appropriately. When assigning tasks, base your decisions on the team member’s skills and not on whom you like the best. Allow people to volunteer first before making assignments. If the team member volunteering doesn’t have the skills, have them work with someone who is an excellent teacher. Otherwise, the tasks won’t get done correctly (if at all), and the person will disengage from the team. I use the PXT Select to ensure I know each team member’s skill level.
  7. Appreciate Each Person. Make sure to appreciate and acknowledge each team member for their contribution, whether large or small. Remember to use “please,” “thank you,” and “great job” often.

©Jeannette Seibly 2021-2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about including every team member: Being inclusive isn’t hard. But it does take awareness, skill, and commitment to ensure all team members feel welcomed, respected, and valued during calls or on-site meetings. So if you are hesitant about what to do, let’s start a conversation to get you into inclusive and productive action. Let’s chat now!

Handle Agreements Today to Avoid Disagreements Tomorrow

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“Everybody’s memories can be faulty! Avoid the inevitable upset by taking good notes!” Jeannette Seibly

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and created a new idea, project, or solution? Then, later, found out they didn’t agree to everything you remember them agreeing to?

This happens frequently. Why? People rely on their memories … and memories can be faulty or selective.

After a short delay, conversational participants may recall from memory fewer than 20% of the specific ideas that were initially expressed.

People overlook the importance of and impact of different memories when getting everyone on the same page, closing sales, and building good working relationships.

Sandra, a business owner, had listed her office building for sale. She’d had great conversations with a potential buyer, and they got along. But after the initial discussion, no one thought to put any of their agreements, changes, or concerns in writing. Then came the day to sign the agreement! Brouhaha broke lose. The other party thought Sandra was trying to scam them. Sandra said, “No! I’m not. Your memory and my memory are different on two key issues. Let’s step back and talk them out.”

Suppose Sandra hadn’t taken responsibility for moving the agreement forward. In that case, it could have ended up in court with no winners or built a bad reputation with both parties accusing the other of lying.

5 Tips to Avoid Agreement Disputes

Put It in Writing! Use a napkin or notepad (cell or paper) to take notes. Then, immediately, memorialize in an email, text, and/or letter and outline points of agreement. This includes noting dates and times. Also, include points of disagreement, other concerns, and opportunities not yet discussed. Ask the other party to review and make any changes. Go back and forth until both are satisfied. Remember, time is not your friend when relying on memories … so follow-up and follow-through asap.

Pay Attention and Ask Clarifying Questions. This is not a time to multi-task. If the other person is not 100% on board, ask, “why?” Let’s use the example above: if the buyer needs an additional bathroom in the office area, write it down. Ask, “Where would the bathroom be located? Why is that important?” Then, note who will talk with the plumber, find out if a building permit is required, and/or speak with the city code enforcer. All this will be done by what date?

Everyone Makes Their Own Assumptions or Interpretations. These can be deal-breakers if not addressed! Don’t gloss over details. Don’t dismiss concerns by stating, “It’s not important.” Or, avoid talking about any elephants in the room! Continuation of the above example: “Who will pay for the new bathroom? What happens if an additional bathroom cannot be added?”

Allow for Silence and Don’t Talk Over Them. Stay focused on the topic. Allow for silence and reflection during the conversation. Remember, being dismissive or minimizing a detail can (and will) haunt the agreement and ability to work together in the future.

Talk Straight and Don’t Hedge. Don’t say, “Maybe we can talk about it later.” If it’s an important issue, talk about it now. Or schedule time to complete the conversation. Send current notes now. Before each scheduled meeting, send a short agenda and continue taking notes and memorializing the additional conversations. Note any changes or additions to ensure everyone stays on the same page.

Remember, keep all notes in the same file or email thread, making them easier to find later. Include date and time. Be specific to ensure accuracy and win-win-win outcomes. For example, it’s easier when creating a legal agreement (if needed) or determining if and when you’re ready to launch a new project.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant, keynote speaker, and author for over 29 years. Her focus is to guide leaders to make a positive difference. Feel stuck moving your team forward? Want straightforward counsel on how to do it? Let’s chat! Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A note from Jeannette about preventing agreements from becoming disagreements: too often, in our haste and busyness, we believe everyone is on the same page. Only to find out later they were not! Our differing memories can have significant consequences and impede progress in a project or launching a solution. Having trouble getting everyone on the same page? Let’s chat now before it’s too late!

Focus on These Top 5 Attributes and Watch Your Sales Increase

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“If your salespeople are continually leaving money on the table due to poor negotiation or numerical skills, it’s time to get real about how you hire and manage salespeople.” Jeannette Seibly

Great salespeople have the attributes required to succeed in their jobs. They genuinely love what they are selling and have a genuine interest in their customers’ growth! They enjoy increasing sales results!

Given that we all want great salespeople, what is the #1 challenge to hire and manage them today?

First and foremost, too often, the person they hire is not the person they interviewed. So, how did they get hired? They looked the part and talked the talk! AND … You failed to use objective data to ascertain the actual ability, interest, and thinking style required to call, prospect, and close sales!

After talking with several business owners and consultants that manage great salespeople, they mentioned 5 top attributes (yes, this is not a scientific study, but it can provide important insights for a great year).

Top 5 Attributes of Successful Sales People

Hire for job fit. Job fit is crucial when hiring the right salespeople the first time. Nothing drains the energy of a top sales team and their customers more than hiring the wrong people. The challenge is hiring people with the thinking style, sales behaviors, and occupational interests that fit the job requirements. If they do not fit the job, you cannot train, motivate, or coach anyone to be a great sales success. Design a strategic hiring process and use objective data. Now, pay attention! Remember, you lose customers, not because you have a lesser product or service, but because they are tired of training your bad hires, over and over!

Be present. Being present in all conversations is a top attribute great salespeople have developed. It starts with excellent listening skills! It’s essential to emphasize that multi-tasking is a myth …  physically doing or mentally thinking of other things during conversations! Instead, train your sales team to engage their full attention in the conversation by actively listening and asking great business questions. These probing skills will uncover additional information and allow people to feel heard. And remember, this is all done before offering solutions.

Know your products and systems. Having a genuine interest in what you are selling and talking with people is critical. Otherwise, the buyer will experience “buyer’s remorse.” When your sales team is well versed in the legalities, systems, and other nuances of using your products and services, your customers will develop trust and rave about their results. Develop this attribute by keeping your team up-to-date with 15-minute morning sessions and monthly training programs.

Be persistent and persevere. Not everyone is ready to buy when your sales team meets with them. Develop easy-to-use systems to stay in touch regularly. Send prospects (and current clients) periodic articles or other noteworthy gems. Show up at networking meetings, and trade shows ready to brag in a business-savvy manner. Stay in touch on social media by “Liking” their posts and accomplishments. This is how persistence and perseverance pay off.

Develop great relationships. This attribute is more important today than ever before. Over time your sales team needs to be a resource for current and future clients to answer their questions. Always follow up and follow through within 24 to 48 hours. Building credibility and integrity is critical. These can be easily sabotaged when you and your sales team fail to treat people as VIPs (very important people).

©Jeannette Seibly, 2016-2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has guided the creation of three millionaires and countless 6-figure income professionals. During the past 29 years, she has become an award-winning international executive and family business management consultant and keynote speaker. Recently, she was able to add another brag. She has been an Authorized PXT Select/PXT Partner with Wiley/Profiles International for 30 years, guiding companies to hire the right person the first time … including hiring and managing salespeople! Have questions? Need help? Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A Note from Jeannette about the top 5 attributes of successful salespeople: some people love selling while others look for the fastest way to a better paycheck! During the hiring and selection process, you must uncover if the candidate will call, prospect, and close a sale. Use objective data instead of relying on your gut or intuition (which is often wrong). The reason you lose customers is that they are tired of training your bad hires over and over! Do you want to learn the fastest and best way to select the right salespeople the first time? If yes, contact me for a confidential conversation.

Being a top influencer in 2022 is a great goal. But now, you need to put the right action plan into place and follow it! So get started today with your FREE copy of Eight Tips to Increase Your Ability to Influence.

Frequent Conversations Are Required to Achieve Intended Results

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“Frequent conversations that are productive stay focused on moving forward.” Jeannette Seibly

Have you ever wondered why we need frequent conversations to achieve intended results? Especially, if you’re a leader with too many demands.

Due to many team members working from home and frequent changes in business, staying focused and staying in communication can be hard.

And, the best way to keep everyone focused on the objectives and key results is through frequent conversations. It encourages progress, keeps everyone productive, and allows for innovative ideas.

How to Have Conversations that Achieve Intended Results

  1. Meet Weekly. When working on any project, meet every week. This encourages team members to get their work done and keeps everyone focused on the objectives and key results.
  2. Keep Meetings On-Point. Put together a short agenda. Review before starting the meeting. Remember, general meetings are a time to keep everyone updated, not a time to tell someone how to do their work. Effective meetings focus on the who, what, when, where, and why of a project.
  3. Use Check-Ins. Instead of meeting with the whole team, meet 1:1 with the team leader and/or team members to stay updated. Also, this is a good way to address specific issues and get resolutions faster.
  4. Create Accountability. At the start of each project, no matter how big or small, create the goal and milestones. Once done, assign each team member to their area of expertise to manage. Now, as a leader, have frequent conversations to review progress and stay updated on any changes.
  5. Stay in Communication. When a team member becomes confronted by an issue, don’t allow the person to isolate. It’s important for everyone to rally together as a team by using straight-talk conversations to help members move forward. And, if the issue is of a personal nature, offer assistance.
  6. Listen to Learn. Instead of listening to rebut (which most of us do), listen to learn. Ask questions. Don’t be afraid to request examples (e.g., show me). This keeps lines of communication open and avoids surprises.
  7. Brag! It’s meaningful to acknowledge each and every person with kudos and congrats on the steps taken and the results achieved. When you sincerely acknowledge someone, your results will magically improve!
  8. Give Meaningful Feedback. Instead of saying, “This needs improvement.” Say, “There are a couple of things I would recommend changing. Can I share them with you?” Then, keep it simple and on-point. Don’t tell them how to do it (unless they ask). Also, be open to their feedback regarding the changes you have asked to be made.
  9. Develop Trust. Trust is critical. It starts with straight talk. Say what you mean and mean what you say.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. During the past 29 years, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and countless 6-figure income professionals. Her brags include being an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker. Do you have questions? Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A Note from Jeannette about having frequent conversations to achieve intended results. With many team members working remotely, it’s important for you to have frequent conversations with team members. If you don’t, it will negatively impact achieving intended results. If you want to learn how to manage conversations with a diverse and remote workforce, contact me for a confidential conversation. Your team and customers will thank you!

 

The 6 C’s Required to Create Crazy Amazing Success Starting Now!

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“Achievement can only happen when you are willing to pursue what you really, really, really want.” Jeannette Seibly

It’s Q4! The craziness of 2021 is winding down. It’s time, if you haven’t done so already, to create new goals or pull them out from hiding in your drawer. Now, deal with the little negative voice in your head! Let’s create real success to support your goals for now and 2022.

The 6 C’s to Practice for Success

CREATE a Vision. What do you really, really, really want to achieve? Put aside what your parents and/or family and/or friends believe is the right vision. If it is a work goal, create the initial goal, plan, and budget before sharing it with your boss.

COURAGE is an Inside Job. Success requires authentically telling the truth about who you are and what you really want to achieve. Then, create the goal and take action instead of waiting for the perfect time (since it’ll never come). If this is an entrepreneurial pursuit, keep your day job until you have enough income to leave.

CONVERSATIONS Must Level Up. The conversations in your head and with others must focus on the outcomes you want to achieve, not on excuses or negativity. These only get in the way of success. Talk like a business person or community advocate when sharing your vision.

For example: Stop talking about feeling unmotivated this past year. Instead, talk about the new book you are writing. Or, the new project you are leading. Or, the new effort to create a community/family garden. The possibilities are endless. Share why it’s important and why it makes a positive difference for you and others. (PS: When having these types of quality conversations, allow others to contribute.)

COMMITMENT Requires Focused Action. Telling yourself, “I’m committed,” but not taking the right focused actions, normally creates failure. If you’re truly committed, create a blueprint supported by actions that lead to your intended results! Now, follow it! Do not create busyness as your new excuse.

CONSISTENCY Each and Every Day. Be bold and audacious by taking one step forward each day. Write in your journal (for your eyes only) and share your brags daily. This will motivate you to stay in action. If you have a day job, find the time and ask for help (e.g., have your family do chores, hire someone to tutor your kids, etc.). Then, honor the time you’ve set aside.

COACHABILITY: The Secret for Success. Asking for help and being coachable starts with hiring the right coach. It makes all the difference. Many entrepreneurs and small business owners fear a coach will change things and they will no longer be in control. Get over it! Be more committed to your success than your ego!

For example, an entrepreneur loved creating new products. But she hated creating the business infrastructure required to grow. She continued to struggle with sales until she learned how to work with her coach and do the work required.

Following these 6 C’s you will achieve crazy amazing success!

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. During the past 29 years, she has guided the creation of three millionaires and countless 6-figure income professionals. Her brags also include being an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker. If you’re struggling to get unstuck, now is a great time to contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation.

A Note About Achieving Crazy Amazing Success from Jeannette. It’s Q4! 2022 is only three months away. Although 2021 has not been business as usual, it’s offered many new opportunities for entrepreneurs. Don’t despair if you’re still thinking about your dream! Q4 is the time to learn the 6 C’s and take focused action. Need help? (We all do from time to time.) Contact me!

How to Be an Effective Coach

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“If you want to be an effective coach, and want others to listen and use what you have to say, first, you must be coachable.” Jeannette Seibly

Many believe being coached is no big deal when they are the coach. Coaches love giving advice and it provides an ego boost. The challenge is, many have learned from a traditional approach of, “Do as I say, not as I do.” Or, they lack the confidence and insight required to be an effective coach.

Do you experience (check all that apply):

  • Giving advice that doesn’t reflect the person’s struggles?
  • Coming across as critical about how it should be done?
  • A lack of insight into what the true issue is?
  • Not having credibility in the listener’s eyes?
  • People ignoring your coaching and doing it their way?

If you answered “yes” to more than one question, it’s important to keep reading!

Today, it’s critical that leaders and managers effectively coach team members for success. The quality of the coaching provided impacts business growth, team member retention, and customer satisfaction.

Remember, if you lack the skills to effectively coach others, it can tarnish your working relationships for a very long time.

Nine Essential Coaching Skills to Improve Your Effectiveness

1. Set a Positive Example. Leaders, bosses, and managers are not perfect. But ethical issues, being late for meetings, or multitasking during conversations (to name a few) hurts your credibility as a coach. Improve your effectiveness by working with your executive coach to address these issues and blind spots.

2. Visualize a Positive Outcome. Take the time to visualize or mentally think through what you want to say. If you hit a snag during this visualization process, rewind and restart to ensure a positive outcome. Read Dr. Lynn Hellerstein’s newest book: Expand Your Vision: How to Gain Clarity, Courage, and Confidence for more information.

3. Be Specific. Write down the specific issues to organize your thoughts about why you need to coach a team member. Saying you found problems with the sales report or you don’t like a graphic is of no value. Instead, be specific about where the report is inaccurate or why the graphic doesn’t have visual appeal. Remember to manage the task, not a person’s personality.

4. Use a Job Fit Tool for Clarity. These tools often include “coaching” reports guiding the leader to be on-target when providing feedback.

One company president uses the coaching information when talking with his direct reports. When there is a problem, he scans the report for insights and adjusts his coaching style. By doing this, the other person feels valued and becomes coachable.

5. Talk Straight and Stay On-Point. Talking in generalities or going off on tangents leaves the team member or co-worker confused and frustrated.

A human resources director (HRD) counseled a financial director (FD) to stop the negative gossip about a vice president (VP). A week later, the FD continued to make negative comments about the VP. FD’s coach said, “I thought HRD had counselled you to stop making negative comments about the VP.” FD’s reply, “No… he stated we need to operate as a team. I was unclear what his point was since I am a team player.”  

This level of confusion is what happens when you speak in generalities.

6. Keep It Confidential and Private. Criticizing a team member in public has repercussions, even when the person says, “No problem. I don’t care if anyone else hears this.” If the person has a public negative reaction, it will often reflect negatively on you. Instead, set up a 1:1 private and confidential meeting immediately after an issue or problem has occurred. Don’t share publicly. During the 1:1, remember to share facts, not opinions. Otherwise, what you say will not be heard as objective feedback.

7. Choose the Appropriate Coaching Approach.

a. When to Use the Direct Approach. Be clear and concise with those that can handle or want that style of feedback. Keep in mind this approach will always depend on the situation (e.g., illness, passing away of a family member, etc.).

“Good report. But when including numbers in a report, you need to include a graph and bullet point the numbers. Any questions? How soon can you get this report updated and back to me?”

b. When to Use the Sandwich Approach. Talk straight and be specific. Use this approach when the situation may cause an emotional reaction, or the person is easily triggered. Share 2 positive actions the person has taken, 2 specific areas for improvement, and close with 2 positive actions the person has taken.

“Your proposal was good. The numbers supported the importance of this project. But when providing this type of information, it’s important to include a graph so the reader can visually see the value. And, bullet point the numbers to make them easier to read and understand. Again, good proposal and I appreciate you getting this done so fast. Any questions? How soon can you get this report updated and back to me?”

8. Have Compassion. Everyone has challenges, especially during this ongoing pandemic. Be empathetic, while sticking to the point.

“It’s hard when a family member has COVID. My heart goes out to those struggling during this pandemic. But when providing written reports, the information and spelling need to be proofread before submitting. Let me know what you need and how I can help.”

9. Share a Story. An effective way to coach others is by sharing a story about your own similar challenge and what you did to work through it. Then, offer one or two ideas for them to implement.

©Jeannette Seibly, 2021 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She has been an award-winning executive coach, management consultant, and keynote speaker for over 28 years. Her focus is getting leaders and their teams unstuck and able to achieve dynamic results. Contact Jeannette for a confidential conversation. 

A note from Jeannette about how to be an effective coach: Successful people have coaches. When leaders and others talk with their coach regularly, their productivity, confidence, and results improve. The challenge is, many don’t believe they need a coach, and hear feedback as criticism. As an entrepreneurial leader, make a commitment to coach others for success by being an effective coach. Want to get started, but don’t know how? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

3 Bad Habits You Need to Break to Be a Confident Leader

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Leaders today are facing new challenges. Remember, it’s important to build true confidence in yourself and others during this time.

Building your confidence today and inspiring confidence in your team is critical! And, given what’s going on in the world, it’s even more important now.

What inevitably gets in the way of being a confident leader? Your bad habits.

Due to all of the uncertainty, as a leader, you are under more pressure than ever before. Now, is when your leadership habits…the good, not-so-good, and bad…can either support you and your team achieving great results or not.

It’s Critical You Breakthrough These 3 Bad Habits

  1. Poor Listening Skills. This #1 bad habit will sabotage your results!   

A leader had a bad habit of checking his emails and texts during meetings. He insisted he was only multitasking and could hear everything being said. He failed to understand the human brain is wired for one activity at a time. (Multi-tasking is a myth!) It wasn’t until he missed hearing critical information that he learned this lesson the hard way. Even after the team member repeated himself, he failed to understand or question the significance of it. As a result, the budget was exceeded and timeline was missed.

Always listen as though your results (and career) depend on it…because they do!

  • Lack of Awareness. One leader constantly found fault with how others did their work. He thought he could do it better and faster. The truth was, he didn’t have the skills to do their jobs. He lacked the awareness of the impact of his comments and did not understand these comments disengaged his team and hurt productivity.  

When someone fails to achieve the required results, it’s time to inspire confidence in your team members, not criticize their work habits. Remember, during this crisis, it’s NOT business as usual.

During ALL conversations stay present and aware:

  • State the intended goal or results in 10 words or less.
  • Listen to each team member’s input and concerns.
  • Work through any push-backs in a win-win manner (think, ethical considerations, workability, impact on others, etc.).
  • Align on the work and completion dates with your team to meet your client’s needs.
  • Provide necessary resources. Remember, working from home is not the same as working from the office.  

Your awareness determines the quality and timeliness of your team’s results.

  • Know-It-All Attitude. A new leader was a micromanager, a common trait of inexperienced leaders. She wanted everything done exactly as she thought it should be done. Whenever a mistake was made, instead of taking responsibility, she blamed her team (and others) for making her feel humiliated and for letting her down.

To break this bad habit, listen to your team members’ ideas. They are working on the front lines and can be resourceful when encouraged to do so. Also, listen from compassion since they are experiencing a lot of frustration, stress, and anxiety during these uncertain times. It’s up to you to inspire confidence in them!

Building true confidence in yourself and others starts inside you.

Remember, bad habits are amplified during a crisis. They will come out and be displayed in unexpected and unwanted ways. Work with an executive coach NOW to effectively navigate through these uncertain times. It’s the mark of a confident leader who inspires confident team members!

©Jeannette Seibly, 2012-2020

Jeannette Seibly is an award-winning dynamic results coach and keynote speaker. For the past 27 years, she has guided the creation of leaders to excel in achieving results. Contact Jeannette today for straight talk with dynamic results. Don’t forget to listen to her podcasts on Anchor.FM or YouTube.com.

I’ve got an invitation for you.

All leaders are bosses! If you want to be a better boss or hope to be a boss someday, I invite you to download “15 Ways to Be a Better Boss”  It’s free.

Mindful Resilience is Required to be a Successful Leader

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Life.Should.2Note: This is a reprint, originally posted on June 23, 2020. Last week I conducted a Mindful Resilience webinar for the Denver Financial Professionals. Participants shared: “This is very helpful…I love it…Thank you.” Due to so many changes occurring right now in the workplace and in life, I would recommend reviewing the 6 Tips.

What can you do to handle your emotional triggers while eliciting the best from others?

We are all triggered by certain words, facial expressions, and gestures. As successful, resilient leaders, we don’t have the luxury of hanging onto our upsets.

Mindful resilience is when we develop a conscious awareness of our triggers and address our reactions in a positive manner. It’s starts with you, as the leader, taking responsibility for your triggers when they occur so they don’t get in the way. Remember, clarity of what triggered your reactions is required before you can create win-win-win outcomes.

6 Tips to Create Mindful Resilience

Breathe. Remember, everyone gets triggered. The moment you notice you are triggered, breathe in for 5 counts. Pause. Exhale for 10 counts. Repeat this practice 3 times. Why should you practice breathing? Breathing reduces the fight, flight, or freeze stress response triggered in your brain. Breathing allows you to take responsibility for your reactions (aka triggers) and is critical before attempting to resolve any issue.

Have Come-Down-to-Reality Conversations. Team members can hold onto upsets and use them to justify their poor job performance. That’s why you, as the leader, need to be aware of when these upsets are brewing and take responsibility for resolving them before they turn into a major issue. Remember to use straight talk with compassion during these tough conversations.

Get to the Heart or Core of the Problem. When you as a leader inadvertently dis someone or ignore a festering issue, upsets will be covertly expressed. It’s like a mole hill expanding into a mountain. Remember, you are human and you will make mistakes! So, will everyone else. Instead of allowing your ego to justify your actions, ask and clarify what happened with your team member or team, then, talk it out. If you don’t, the upset will become an irreversible issue that overshadows the core problem.

Be Responsible for Your Communication Style (most people aren’t)! When you use words or terminology that others don’t understand, apologize. Start over by asking questions and be curious about their responses. It’s very easy to lose people when you present the same information over and over (think, you’re probably bored). Also, when you’re presenting a new idea you’ve been thinking about for a while, remember, it’s the first time they’ve heard it. Keep in mind, people learn at different rates of speed. Be prepared to draw a graph or show them a specific example. Remember, as a leader, it’s your responsibility to slow down and get everyone on the same page.

Learn How to Forgive, Even When You Don’t Believe You Should. As a leader, you will have arrows aimed at you when team members feel frustrated or upset. But you don’t have the luxury of hanging onto these insults without them impacting your mindset and success as a leader. Forgive those that gossip, criticize, or blame you. While this is easier said than done, remember, forgiveness is for you. Remember, you don’t to say, “I forgive you” to the offender to forgive them. If you do, it may make it worse.

Hire the Right Coach. Mindful resilience requires you to expand your POV. When a sticky situation or political relationship is not going well, talk immediately with your executive coach. Listen and learn. You can make things worse and sideline your career if you attempt to do it on your own.

©Jeannette Seibly 2020

Jeannette Seibly is an award-winning executive coach and keynote speaker.  For more than 27 years, she has been an expert in guiding leaders to excel at working through difficult situations and political relationships. Contact Jeannette to improve your strategic hiring, coaching, training, and managing processes.  Don’t forget to listen to her podcasts on Anchor.FM or YouTube.com.

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