Want Better Results? Encourage Employees to Speak Up

“Want great results? Encourage your employees to stand up and speak up!” Jeannette Seibly

Yes, we’re all busy! But taking the time and encouraging employees to speak up ensures better solutions and retention of top talent!

Many leaders fear taking risks, especially today. And in turn, employees fear speaking up to report mistakes, ask questions, offer new ideas, or challenge action plans or decisions. With everyone focused on keeping their jobs or not rocking the boat, projects, and plans fail because no one risked standing up and speaking up!

(Watch “Air,” a film based on true events about the origin of Air Jordan, Nike’s basketball shoe line with rookie player Michael Jordan. An employee had to step up and speak up. It forever changed how players were treated.)

How to Get Employees Talking and Creating Solutions

First, ASK! The #1 key to encourage employees to stand up and speak up!

Second, LISTEN! If you don’t, they won’t speak up again.

Brainstorming! Many leaders do a poor job of brainstorming. They latch on to the first idea that sounds good! However, often, it’s not. Learn how to truly brainstorm. It saves customers, bottom lines, and retention!

Critical Thinking! Take the time to conduct an analysis of essential considerations with all ideas (e.g., budget, ROI, impact on others, company mission and vision, workability, etc.).

Listen, Value, and Build. Use good listening skills and value others’ thoughts and opinions. Then, build on these ideas. Remember, all ideas can spark new ones. Build on these for better solutions. Also, avoid consensus building and focus on alignment with team members before agreeing on a plan.

Encourage Everyone on the Team to Participate. Ask each person several times for their input. Then, allow them to say “pass.” Many times, the second or third time, they’ll offer great insights. So, don’t ignore or overlook them.

Provide Training and Manage Conflicts. While having differing ideas is important, it needs to be a safe space for employees to talk! Ensure everyone is trained on how to participate in meetings (NO! It’s not natural, and learning by trial and error leads to employee disengagement). Manage disagreements by ensuring every employee can share without being criticized, humiliated, or made fun of.

Team Selection Is Important. Most teams fail because they include employees with no interest or time to commit (but meet diversity initiatives). Seek out those with the interest and willingness to attend all meetings. Include those without the skills with someone they can learn from during the project.

Get Out of the Way! Like in the movie Air, leaders do get in the way! It would be best to learn how to work through new ideas without shutting down employees from speaking up. For example: After a 6-month employee project, a company president decided he didn’t want employees offering suggestions to solve a critical issue. The problem? He feared the risks of adopting a new approach to solve an old problem.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She is an award-winning international executive coach, speaker, and business author. Her wisdom of over 30 years guides clients to work through sticky situations and challenging relationships. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about getting employees to speak up: I remember working with a client that bet me a cookie that I could NOT get her employees talking. Yes, I won the cookie! (And I’ve won other similar bets with other clients!) When you are willing to listen and value employees’ input, they will talk! Often, their ideas are better than yours! It’s learning how to do it! Contact me for a confidential conversation about team facilitation.

Have You Considered the benefits of strengthening your ability to ask for and listen to employees’ input about a project or plan? It makes a positive difference in your success as a leader! I have extensive experience guiding leaders to work with and through their teams to achieve unprecedented results. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Remember, coaching speeds up your ability to win.

Ask your employees to share their ideas! This is a superpower that many leaders fail to develop! Then, they experience turnover, shaky bottom lines, and loss of customers. Working with and through others builds confidence and the ability to influence! Take action and contact me for a confidential conversation.

How to Achieve Results While Working through Uncertainty

“Uncertainty in life is normal. Embracing it fully creates a positive difference to achieve results.” Jeannette Seibly

When you feel uncertain about a decision, it is often due to your fear of making a mistake, experiencing a failure, or not being in control of the outcome. Uncertainty feels uncomfortable. Many people will do everything they can to avoid it, which causes anxiety in their jobs, relationships, careers, businesses, and life choices. But life never provides absolute certainty.

So, how can you make uncertainty a superpower and have it help you create a great business, career, and life? Keep reading!

Tips to Work Through Uncertainty for Great Results

Be Open to Others’ Ideas. Like many leaders, you rely on your thoughts, opinions, and feelings about what is true and certain. But this is short-sighted. Instead, welcome others’ ideas. Learn how to brainstorm. For each idea, develop five reasons it could work, not why it won’t.

Unleash the Power of Others. Delegate! Get comfortable delegating! Allow others the opportunities to explore new ideas, even if you’re uncertain whether or not they’ll work. Their ideas and results can often be better than yours if you get out of the way!

Embrace Not Knowing How to Achieve the Outcome. Otherwise, you’ll feel stuck, paralyzed, and procrastination will set in. Instead, allow for the fact that you don’t know that you don’t know! And not knowing is OK. (Yes, reread those sentences.) Be clear about the goal and outcome you want to achieve. Now, move forward step-by-step with your team and executive coach through the uncertainty.

Develop Inner Confidence. Celebrate each step along the way, no matter how big or small. Develop “brags” to help you gain confidence and believe in yourself. “Brags” remind you that you’ve handled uncertainty and achieved successful outcomes in the past.

Make the Best Decisions for Now. When making decisions, collect factual data and don’t rely solely on your intuition/gut or overthink everything. Remember, no one has a crystal ball that foretells the future. While many believe success demands you move forward, a good decision can also include staying where you are (e.g., signing a new lease with your current landlord). Remember, uncertainty can and will still occur because uncertainty doesn’t go away.

Avoid Group Think; It Impedes Agility. Too often, during times of uncertainty, fear will prevail. Then, the team will adapt to the fear. Instead, share your concerns, and ask good questions.

  • “What would be the best outcome for this project or program?”
  • “What would we need to change?
  • “Give me five reasons why these changes could work?”
  • “Why won’t these changes work?”

Now, allow the team to own the project. Be their champion for winning and working through the unknown factors! And always welcome critical thinking!

If you embrace these six tips, uncertainty becomes your superpower!

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She is an award-winning international executive coach, speaker, and business author. Her wisdom of over 30 years guides clients to work through sticky situations and challenging relationships. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about embracing uncertainty in work and life: We seek certainty in everything we do. We think it helps us avoid making mistakes or experiencing failure while staying in control of the outcome. Yet, doing the same old same old will hurt your team, results, and bottom line. Want uncertainty to become one of your superpowers? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Have You Considered: Strengthening your inherent superpowers? It can make a big difference in your success as a leader! I have extensive experience guiding leaders to work with and through their teams to achieve unprecedented results. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Remember, coaching speeds up your ability to win.

Taking the safe path to avoid uncertainty will never work in your business, career, and life. Develop your superpower and learn how to work through uncertainty. It builds confidence and the ability to influence others! Take action and contact me for a confidential conversation.

Leaders Who Quietly Quit Their Employees Hurt Their Company

“Quietly quitting your employees will come back to haunt you!” Jeannette Seibly

In Q3, I wrote an article about how to prevent employees from quietly quitting their jobs. The newest craze is for leaders to quietly quit their employees! For some leaders, “quiet quitting” is in retaliation to employees quietly quitting on them.

Yikes! It’s creating a vicious circle with no winners!

For leaders, what does quiet quitting your employees look like?

You may change, eliminate, or withhold:

  • Flexible work schedules
  • Paid training and skills development
  • Availability for 1:1 or team meetings
  • Focus on employees’ self-care
  • Bonuses
  • Benefit packages
  • Acknowledgment and appreciation

During and following the pandemic, leaders significantly enhanced these benefits and actions to attract and keep employees.

But it’s pay now or pay later! If you’re citing the reason for making these changes as a way to improve your bottom line, stop and think! This form of quiet quitting will hurt your company’s productivity and your ability to improve retention, revenues, and results now and in the future!

How to Stop Quietly Quitting Your Employees

Remember, your actions speak louder than your words!

Keep the Lines of Communication Open. To turn around employees that may have quietly quit (yes, you’re the leader … it’s up to you):

  • Meet 1:1 at least twice a month
  • Have short weekly team meetings to keep everyone on the same page
  • Keep an open door
  • Have the tough conversations when employees are not producing the required results
  • Show that you care by guiding them to achieve intended results

 Make It Safe for Employees to Speak Up. If employees feel you’ve quietly quit them, they will hesitate or fear reporting mistakes, asking questions, offering new ideas, or challenging a plan. Leaders and employees cannot hide when they’ve quietly quit! Remember, your actions speak louder than your words! Work with your coach to get back in the game of being a great leader!

Don’t Change Policies & Procedures (P&P). If they are working, there is no need to change them. It doesn’t save time or money! However, if employees abuse the P&Ps, manage them for the intended results. For example, if you’ve been allowing flextime, and it’s not working, have a team meeting to discuss it and develop win-win solutions.

Upgrade Training & Development. It’s very short-sighted to stop providing training and development. These dollars keep your employees’ skills top-notch. Remember, you cannot replace employees or teams without experiencing the lag time before they are fully productive! This can range from weeks to months (sometimes several years!). Create individualized career plans with the required budget dollars.

Require Coaching for Managers. This is critical. Usually, when managers don’t want a coach, there is a reason (e.g., fear, dislike of people, unable to delegate). Hire outside executive coaches to support them. This will eliminate your managers from quietly quitting and these managers from quietly quitting their employees. Remember, the other leaders within the company are often poor coaches since they want others to follow the same pathway they did. But they can make great mentors.

Ensure a Competitive Benefits & Compensation Package. Employees stay where they are valued. It also attracts top talent when weighing job offers! Make changes to pull together a comprehensive package, not reduce coverages. Messing with employees’ pay and benefits will cause quiet quitting or worse!

Focus on Team Development. Throwing together team members to meet diversity and inclusion efforts is failing. But the reality is that most teams were failing before the pandemic due to a lack of resources and poor leadership—base team creation on required skills. Or team members will quietly quit due to lack of interest. Also, make sure you and your teams are continually developing skills, including facilitation skills.

Keep Focusing on Well-Being. Many employees are experiencing burnout! It’s one of the reasons they quietly quit! This issue will not go away by ignoring it and quietly quitting on them! Honor their work hours. Encourage breaks and vacations! Do not allow employees to come to the office if they are ill! Don’t forget to focus on your self-care too!

Thoughtfully Develop Your Workplace Culture. Engagement and connection to the company’s vision and mission are essential. But many leaders and their employees have forgotten all about it! Review the company’s core values when you or your team are struggling. Consider making this a monthly practice and discussion. Are the decisions you’re making in alignment with the company’s vision and mission? For example, are your selection practices for hiring, job promotions, and job transfers in alignment? Most are not.

Instead of quietly quitting on your team members, take the time to engage, create workable solutions, and develop their skills. Your involvement makes a significant and sustainable workplace culture now and in the future. Don’t forget! The bonus is that happy employees keep customers from straying to your competition!

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She is an award-winning international executive coach, speaker, and business author. Her wisdom of over 30 years guides clients to work through sticky situations and challenging relationships. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about leaders quietly quitting on their employees: Leaders are doing this for several reasons, including retaliation for employees quietly quitting on them. It’s time to step up as a leader and get back in the game. Or you will lose customers and a healthy bottom line. Contact me for a confidential conversation to re-engage yourself and your employees before it’s too late.

Have You Considered: As a leader, strengthening employee engagement is critical to everyone’s success. I have extensive experience guiding leaders to engage their teams and achieve unprecedented results. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Remember, coaching speeds up your ability to engage your employees to excel.

When you feel like quietly quitting your job, stop! Working through sticky situations and complex relationships isn’t hard if you understand “why!” Your mindset impacts your resilience and ability to achieve intended results! Stop waiting and hoping things will change! It won’t get easier if you wait! Instead, take action and contact me for a confidential conversation.

Resilience Requires Leaders to Step Up

“Successful leaders must strengthen their resilience to achieve results.” Jeannette Seibly

Traditionally, resilience was about being mentally tough, stoic, and silent about your true feelings. In other words, don’t say anything and hide your reactions.

The American Psychological Association defines resilience: Resilience is the process and outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences, especially through mental, emotional, and behavioral flexibility and adjustment to external and internal demands.

I’m amazed by the number of younger employees who hate their jobs and say, “I’d rather be unemployed.” They jump from one position to another and are often surprised that there is no relief. Many older employees may not love their job responsibilities either. But they have developed a healthy resilience to adapt and become flexible to their jobs’ typical external and internal demands.

This is resilience today! Leaders need to acknowledge their feelings or emotions when triggered and not let them run the show! And, while it is healthy to express yourself, verbal dumping doesn’t work and only creates resentment, not resilience.

Resilience requires taking responsibility and addressing your reactions in a positive manner with your team. Doing so allows for new ideas, resolutions, and solutions to appear.

7 Tips to Create Resilience

Breathe. When you notice you are triggered, breathe in for 5 counts. Pause. Exhale for 5 counts. (Or any number that works for you.) Repeat this breathing pattern 3 times. Breathing reduces the fight, flight or freeze stress response triggered in your brain. Breathing also allows you to take responsibility for your reactions (aka triggers) and is critical before attempting to resolve any issue.

Self-Care. Self-care is essential today for leaders to strengthen their resilience. There are many changes occurring in jobs and workplaces where you have no control over the impact (e.g., loss of employment, work responsibilities, etc.). If you’ve experienced a loss (family member, pet, job, finances, etc.), take the time to grieve. Remember, you do have a choice in your reaction and the attitude you choose.

Get to the Heart or Core of the Problem. Conflicts between you and your team, or between team members, need immediate resolution. This requires a commitment and resilience to work through the apprehension and fear that often stop you and others from achieving the intended results.

Be Responsible for Your Communication Style (most people aren’t)! As a leader, take responsibility. It strengthens resilience. When you are responsible for how you communicate, you show others they can trust you.

Examples:

  • Apologize and stop using words or terminology that others don’t understand.
  • Ask team members questions when they present new ideas and be curious.
  • Remember, when presenting a new solution you’ve been thinking about, it’s the first time they’ve heard it.
  • Keep in mind that people learn at different rates of speed. So take it slow to ensure everyone is on the same page.

Have Reality-Based Conversations. Team members may hold onto upsets, exaggerate them, and use them to justify their poor job performance. Resilience and straight talk with compassion require having tough conversations. Before these conversations, get the facts. Then, talk with your executive coach, boss, or human resources to clarify how to create a positive outcome.

Learn How to Forgive, Even When You Don’t Believe You Should. As a leader, you will have arrows aimed at you when team members feel frustrated or upset. But resilience is vital. While this is easier said than done, forgive those that gossip about, criticize, or blame you. Remember, forgiveness is for you. Remember, don’t say, “I forgive you,” to the offender. This often only worsens the situation since they believe there is nothing to be forgiven for.

Hire the Right Coach. When you’re resilient, you can expand your point of view and step up as a leader. If sticky situations or political relationships are not going well, immediately talk with your executive coach to strengthen your resilience. Listen and learn. You can make things worse and sideline your career if you attempt to do it alone. The same mindset or lack of awareness that created the problem will not resolve it!

©Jeannette Seibly 2020 -2023 All Right Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. With over 30 years as an award-winning international executive coach, speaker, and business author, Jeannette’s clients effectively work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about strengthening your resilience: Being aware of your feelings and emotions is essential. When you verbally dump on others, it’s damaging and demonstrates a lack of resilience on your part. Contact me for a confidential conversation to strengthen your resilience.

Consider: Strengthening resilience takes time and the experience of successfully working through challenges. I have extensive experience guiding leaders (current and future) to achieve unprecedented results. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Remember, coaching speeds up your ability to excel, starting with strengthening your resilience.

Have you met a challenge you’ve not been able to work through? Many managers and directors have, and their bosses may not be of much help. Now’s the time to develop your resilience and ability to achieve intended results! Waiting will not make a positive difference. Take action and contact me for a confidential conversation.

Honor Your Grief Now

Honoring your grief can be difficult as a leader and normally strong person. Throughout our careers, we’re taught to be stoic, mentally tough, and strong in the face of adversity. Unfortunately, these traits and others fail to support us during life’s unalterable challenges.

When my cat, Gracee, passed away suddenly two weeks ago, I was devastated. My counselor said, “No more work for the next two days.” This was despite my excuses. She added, “Do not make life decisions at this point either. You need time to honor your grief.” I followed her advice and can see (and feel) the difference.

The death of a spouse, parent, child, sibling, family member, or pet can be devastating, even when we believe we are ready for it. A professional woman denied that people needed to feel and deal with their grief. She thought she was completely prepared and too strong to experience grief … until her mother died. Then, she understood that grief happens to all of us regardless of our opinions about it.

The following are some other ways you may experience grief due to fear and not feeling safe in today’s world (the list is not intended to be inclusive):

  • Divorce and loss of home
  • Job loss or working in a job you hate
  • Natural weather disasters
  • Health issues
  • Loss of money
  • Failure at work
  • Outside factors (e.g., pandemic, school shootings, political rhetoric, and economic uncertainty)

Here are ideas to help you honor your grief:

  1. Talk with a therapist or grief counselor. They are skilled (and licensed) to guide you through the five common stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These stages can happen all at once. Having an experienced counselor to talk through your challenges can help you avoid making decisions that are not in your best interest.
  2. Take Time … Grief Is Not a Quick and Easy Process. You may need to take time beyond your company’s bereavement policy. If it is a job loss, work with a career counselor after taking time to process your anger and cry. Talk with a business advisor if it is due to a business loss. The key is to honor, and not ignore, the grief while taking the actions required to move forward.
  3. Journal for your eyes only. A University of Michigan study has shown that writing can engage the brain differently. This allows you to dig deeper to find peace. Remember, do not send out your letters. To repeat, these are for your eyes only. For me, it helped me realize Gracee was now well and at peace and to be grateful for our time together.
  4. It’s OK to Cry. Yes, tears do help and can erupt at any time. Allow them to do so now to avoid additional stress in your body. For example, if you are in a meeting, excuse yourself. Cry. Then return to your meeting if you can and be present. I stopped wearing mascara for three days.
  5. Set Up a Tribute or Memorial. There are so many ways of doing this. Social media makes it easier. Be sure to talk with other family members first. In last week’s newsletter, I included “In Memory of the COO in my life” and included a cute cat picture of Gracee. It really helped.
  6. Health Wise. Self-care is essential during this time. Exercise, rest, and eat appropriately. Yes, it may be challenging to do so … but not doing so can hurt your health and well-being.
  7. Stay in Communication. Reach out. If you’re unable to talk, simply listen. Work with your therapist or let a friend know if you need to vent. Be responsible for not making judgments or burning bridges that could hurt your job or career in the future.

Something to consider: An executive refused to grieve after surviving a natural weather disaster where she lived. Months later, she experienced an executive meltdown and lost her job. This might not have happened if she had taken the time to honor her grief.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. With over 30 years as an award-winning international executive coach, speaker, and business author, Jeannette’s clients effectively work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about honoring your grief: Many leaders and other normally strong people don’t take the time to grieve. They believe it hurts their credibility and can create a loss of respect. But failing to honor your grief will come out at some time and somewhere if you don’t honor it now. Contact me for a confidential conversation when you’re ready to move forward. (I’m not a licensed therapist.)

NOTE: Life has a way of throwing you challenges that move you into unknown situations at work and in life. I love coaching and supporting current and future leaders during these transitions. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Remember, coaching speeds up your ability to develop the confidence, competence, and clarity required to be a great leader.

Your managers need your help! They are being held accountable for results and people, and many don’t have the skills to do it well! Therefore, they fail to achieve the intended results! It’s time to provide an Effective Manager and Director Workshop and ongoing coaching. The company’s increase in retention, revenues, and results will thank you! Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Producing Effective Results Requires Trusting Yourself

“Trusting yourself requires experience, resilience, and the willingness to learn from your mistakes.” Jeannette Seibly

Wanting to be a leader, boss, team member, and good citizen requires trusting yourself to take the right actions and asking for help on what to do to create effective results. What you do or do not do impacts others’ ability to trust you to make win-win-win decisions.

How often have you decided and second-guessed yourself because you didn’t trust yourself? Too often, we realize that if you’d asked the right questions or knew what you now know, you’d have made a better decision. But we didn’t trust ourselves, and every leader has been there.

So, how do we learn to trust ourselves?

Important Traits Required to Trust Yourself

Tell the Truth! We love to rationalize, justify, and lie to ourselves and others that we’re doing our best. Trusting yourself is built by asking for help when you don’t know what to do.

Example: What are you doing to make it difficult for your team members to trust you to achieve intended results or to ask you for help (e.g., gossiping, withholding resources, blaming others, etc.)?

Honor Your Word. This can be difficult for many people, including leaders. But, remember, while you may not believe your word impacts yourself or others, it does … and builds or diminishes trust.

Example: Pick up the phone and talk directly with the right person to solve a team conflict or other brewing issue (e.g., HR, boss, or coach). Then, follow through!

Stop Relying Solely on Intuition or Gut Feelings. Too many people rely on feelings, social media rants, and other lousy information and cite these as intuitive or gut reactions. While scientific studies indicate intuition and gut reactions are important, we can’t rely solely on them when making decisions.

Example: Too many hiring bosses rely on intuition and incorrectly use job fit assessments when selecting the right person for the job. This creates losses in retention, revenues, and results.

Learn the Rules. Many people today flaunt or ignore the rules; they are there for a reason. While they may need changing, complaining about them or signing a petition doesn’t make a difference. Building trust in yourself means being accountable for what you say and do with others.

Example: Are you working within your company’s policies and standard operating procedures? Or do you hope no one notices you aren’t? Learning the rules prevents you from planning your excuses if there is a huge and costly mistake.

Learn to Apologize for Mistakes. Instead of relying on your excuses when you make a mistake, genuinely use these words, “I’m sorry.” “I apologize.”  By trusting yourself to apologize for your mistakes, you will build trust with others so they know you take responsibility for your actions.

Example: A woman failed to show up twice in meetings she’d requested, set up with the same person, and then refused to apologize for being a no-show. This is what it looks like when you don’t trust yourself; it encourages others not to trust you.

Be Coachable! The fastest way to learn to trust yourself and encourage others to trust you is to be coachable. While no one can know what to do in every situation, trust yourself to seek the right person to coach you through the best way to resolve issues. Listen and follow the advice of your coach and boss.

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. With over 30 years as an award-winning international executive coach, speaker, and business author, Jeannette’s clients effectively work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about trusting yourself: Many leaders like to think they trust themselves. Yet, they don’t. How do you know? Watch their actions, which speak louder than words. Contact me to assess how to trust yourself more for better results.

NOTE: Learning to trust yourself requires making the right choices and the right changes. I love coaching and supporting current and future leaders during critical and strategic situations. Contact me if you want an in-depth, one-on-one hour over 13 weeks. Remember, coaching accelerates your ability to trust yourself. This, in turn, influences your team for unprecedented results that others applaud.

How’s your leadership development progressing? Are you moving forward … or a tad stuck? Do you need a “nudge” and “clarification?” Want to accelerate and soar your results? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Be Present When Listening

“When you’re present during conversations, you become an influential leader because you heard what was being said.” Jeannette Seibly

If we want people to talk to us more, we should start by listening to them more. Simon Sinek

  • Would you like to achieve epic results?
  • Have working relationships with team members that develop them to be leaders?
  • Keep reading!

When we’re in meetings or conversations, and someone else is talking, we often allow ourselves to think of other things. The problem? We stop listening. We miss what the other person said. We also miss nuances that make a big difference in the person’s meaning, even if they didn’t say it.

In my recent article, Are Your Relationships Working?, I mentioned “Be Present” as a key to building relationships. I don’t know about you, but I don’t feel a positive affinity when someone is unable or unwilling to listen to what I have to say. Also, as an excellent listener, I am always amazed by others who fail to hear due to bad habits or an unwillingness to be present.

So, what are the critical tips for “being present” during conversations? How does being present impact retention (aka relationships), revenues, and results? Keep reading!

5 Key Tips to Be Present When Listening

Be Focused. When entirely focused on the person speaking, what you learn and hear, and the solutions that can evolve are incredible. It’s true. Just listening and setting aside internal mental chatter makes the person feel valued and respected (aka retention).

Stop Multi-tasking. When listening, set aside your work, negative feelings, and other distractions (e.g., social media posts, gadgets, email notifications). That will allow you to hear the genuine concerns you will otherwise miss (think, customer and employee satisfaction).

Stay Mentally Focused. Instead of allowing yourself to think of rebuttals or allowing yourself to be triggered by what they’ve said, be present and listen. Yes, I understand; this is easier said than done. However, successful leaders learn not to be offended and address issues at the appropriate time.

Set Aside Answers. Too often, when we listen, we listen to develop a solution or answer the person … even when they don’t ask a question! Instead, be present and listen. Don’t offer ideas. Listen to just listen. Be a facilitator and guide the person to brainstorm, allowing them to develop their own answers.

Ask Questions. When you are present, you can ask questions that ensure you understand what is being said. Being present and listening will allow you to inquire into gaps in their thinking or contradictions. Use facts, not feelings, when asking questions (feelings are fleeting and usually don’t reflect the speaker’s words spoken at that moment).

©Jeannette Seibly 2023 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and business author. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. As a result, they can work through sticky situations and challenging relationships to become positive influencers. Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a three-time Amazon Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about being present when listening: It can be challenging to listen when someone is long-winded, or you have no interest in what s/he is saying. The problem? As a leader, not listening hurts your retention (aka relationships), revenues, and results. And being present and listening can make a big difference in what you hear. It allows you to reduce misinterpretations and hurt feelings. Contact me if you’re unclear about how to be present, especially when you don’t want to listen.

This week’s PODCAST: Listen to the Moments of Brilliance: You Don’t Have to Have the Answers! with my guest, Denise Roberts, on The Entrepreneurial Leader.

Stop Quiet Quitting and Create Solutions

“Boredom results from not stretching beyond your current skills.” Jeannette Seibly

According to Fortune, 82% of GenZs and Millennials are quietly quitting. When I shared this shocking stat with a friend, she talked about a young family member ignored by her bosses! The GenZer would like to take on more challenging work and has often asked for more opportunities. But each time, she continues to be dismissed. So, she quietly quit her job.

As a member of any generation, you can be part of the problem or part of the solution, whether you’re the boss or employee. When employees of all ages feel bored, not challenged, or experience long-term job dissatisfaction, it creates quiet quitting! Remember, problems always have solutions. Left unaddressed, quiet quitting can sabotage your profitability and results too.

Bosses, remember, GenZs and Millennials are our future. Now is the time to train, develop, and coach them to create good work and results-producing skills … not discourage them further.

Two Points of View to Prevent Quiet Quitting

1. First, learn about career blind spots.

Boss: Create a strategic selection system to collect objective, valid, and reliable data for your hiring, job transfers, and promotions, and rehire decisions.

Employee: While you chose your profession for various reasons, you’re suffering because the job doesn’t fit you! Before you keep job hopping, discover your blind spots and focus on job fit. Talk with an executive coach. It’ll save you from career disillusionment and giving up on yourself or pursuing jobs that don’t fit you.

2. Do your homework.

Boss: Stop relying on the interview as your primary source during the hiring process. Using a strategic selection system will improve collecting objective, valid, and reliable data.

Employee: Before taking a job, conduct your due diligence by asking questions of the interviewers and your professional network. Talk about training, education reimbursement, and other opportunities available to grow that are important to you. Remember, you will have many career options during your lifetime … it’s your responsibility to build on these and not blame your employer for your lack of success.

3. Create Depth of Knowledge.

Boss: Many employees hate repetitive work or being micromanaged. Look for opportunities to allow them to make mistakes and learn.

Employee: Ask for opportunities to dig deeper into accounting, human resources, marketing, etc. Start with learning the basics (e.g., math, accounting, sales, hiring and assessment legalities). The knowledge and ability to use this information correctly can promote you further faster.

4. Create a Breadth of Awareness.

Boss: Provide new opportunities for upskilling, reskilling, and training and development as part of your team members’ career path.

Employee: Take an active role in interdepartmental teams addressing company-wide issues. Listen, ask questions, and learn. This helps you develop and use your knowledge and skills to positively impact the company and its clients.

5. Stay Current.

Boss: Provide weekly department meetings and monthly 1:1 sessions. Discuss what’s working, what’s missing, and the resources needed. Don’t forget to include coaching on taking initiative and being resourceful.

Employee: It’s easy to get bored. But actually, it’s easier to make an effort to learn more and expand your knowledge about your current job. It’s up to you to take the initiative!

6. Attend Professional Association and/or Trade Meetings.

Boss: Provide budget dollars and opportunities for employees to attend these events.

Employee: Don’t be shy. Get out there to meet and greet others. Ask and listen to current and future issues in the industry you work in … or wish to work in.

7. Stop Hoping for Job Satisfaction and Create It.

Boss: It’s up to you to provide appropriate initiatives or challenges for each employee to enhance their job satisfaction.

Employee: Hope is not a strategy. Grab your “Brag” book and complete the 5 easy steps. Now, share your brags with your boss and create action steps for what’s next in developing your career path. Yes, you need to take an active part! PS: Use your brags during Performance Appraisals and work reviews too.

8. Keep Learning!

Boss: Provide budget dollars for ongoing training and development. Include online and onsite workshops. Remember, you’re creating the next generation of leaders!

Employee: Your brain loves to learn. Even if you have a degree or trade certification, take advantage of company training and workshops. Primarily focus on skills required for career growth:  emotional intelligence, communication, project management, and leadership. (Yes, even before you need them.) Don’t forget critical, often overlooked education: financial planning, money management, technical certificates (for non-technical people), etc.

9. Hire a Coach!

Boss and Employee: Find the money. Hire the coach. Remember, successful people of all ages have coaches.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about how to create solutions for quiet quitters: The challenge is that all employees need to take the initiative to develop their technical and other skills to have job satisfaction. As the boss, it’s your responsibility to get into action to guide the development of these needed skills. Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Quiet quitters often have unrecognized blind spots that get in the way of job satisfaction. It’s essential for you to uncover them now, before you quit or are transferred or promoted to new positions (remember the Confucius quote: “Where ever you go, go with all your heart.”):  https://bit.ly/BeEffectiveLeader

Learn How to Spot Toxic Future Employees During Job Interviews

“Toxic employees diminish trust while sabotaging the company, customers, and team.” Jeannette Seibly

A leader recently asked me, “How do you spot a narcissist during a job interview?” He’d just fired one. I shared that they and other types of toxic employees can be challenging to spot. “It’s why using a structured interview approach, and a qualified assessment tool are important to help you spot them.” My recommendations are shared in this article.

Learning how to spot toxic future employees before hiring them can be tricky. However, it becomes easier when you use a well-defined strategic selection system and interview process. The challenge is, listening and not explaining away apparent signs.

“Toxic employees create discord, crush morale and reduce coworkers’ productivity.” (Insperity)

Many toxic workers have the skills to do the job. But due to “you owe me” attitudes, poor emotional intelligence, and not being coachable, they create unhealthy work environments. As a result, they diminish trust while sabotaging others’ work and the company’s growth.

Tips to Conduct Interviews to Uncover the Truth  

Listen and Be Present! You are more likely to spot toxic behaviors and attitudes if you do.

  • They change their story or lie about the facts
  • They answer your questions with questions
  • They are evasive in their answers
  • They tell you what you want to hear and blame others
  • They are always right
  • They make snarky or inappropriate comments

These job seekers may have the job skills but rarely fit into a healthy workplace.

Use a Structured Interview Focused on Job Skills. Their responses reveal their actual ability and interest in doing the work. Use the Rule of 3 to deep dive to understand their responses. Avoid asking about favorite colors, books read, or music they enjoy! Their responses can be misleading and cover up their genuine willingness to do the job.

Ask Interview Questions That Invite Negativity. Allow candidates to share experiences they’ve been coached not to talk about. But don’t ask more than two of these types of questions to prevent true top talent from ghosting you!

Two great questions:

  • “Tell me about a conflict you had with your boss or coworker.”
  • “What did you do when you received feedback you didn’t like from your boss or team?”

Listen for: blaming others, being unable to admit mistakes, or how people “should be.” Or conversely, “I always get along with everyone.” These are red flags!

Use a Qualified Job Fit Assessment. These tools have behaviorally based interview questions to help you uncover a person’s fit with the job. While they are not designed to state if a person is “toxic or not,” the questions help you learn more about the essential qualities the person will bring to the job.

I recently talked with a job candidate for a manager position. The person had an answer for everything and frequently spoke about enjoying conflict and debates with others. While these traits can be great in negotiations, most employees will revolt working for this type of boss.

Don’t Rely on Only One Interview. Many toxic people love to gossip or have other problematic attitudes they can turn on and off. Conduct several well-structured interviews instead of relying on your intuition or gut. During the process, you’ll learn more about the person’s true beliefs, work ethic, and ability to work with and through others to achieve intended results. Use a well-designed strategic selection system and follow it; most toxic future employees are less likely to stick around.

Don’t Dismiss Warning Signs. People’s choice of words conveys their thoughts, feelings, and opinions. Many poor job performers use negative words when talking about coworkers and bosses. They speak as the victim, are judgmental, and cannot empathize. They talk in absolutes: always and never. Don’t overlook their choice of words or explain them away.

Remember, toxic employees cost you time, money, and sleepless nights. A well-designed strategic selection system is a powerful tool to help you avoid hiring them.

Source for this article: Hire Amazing Employees: How to Increase Retention, Revenues and Results!

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about how to spot toxic future employees during job interviews: The challenge is that they often have the skills to do the job. But due to poor attitudes, being self-centered, and not being coachable, they can create unhealthy work environments. Need help upgrading your hiring practices? Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Leaders need to influence others to be successful. But many times, their blind spots speak too loudly and get in the way. For actual professional growth, use objective data to discover your blind spots now, before it’s too late:  https://bit.ly/BeEffectiveLeader

How to Use Failure to Grow Your Success and Opportunities

“Failure can lead to new successes and opportunities … are you ready?” Jeannette Seibly

Many leaders and bosses fear failure. Why? They want to look good in the eyes of their team, boss, and customers and be well-liked. The problem is that when leaders fear failure, they can become locked in a myopic point-of-view of what can be accomplished and how it should be done. This limits their successes and opportunities. Another result of being fearful is that team members and customers leave.

How to Attract New Career Success and Opportunities

Rock the Boat. Rocking the boat doesn’t mean someone or something has to go overboard! Instead, it means stretching outside your everyday thinking and including your team during this process. It strengthens everyone’s ability to brainstorm, use critical thinking, and disrupt the common limitations that hurt results. The key is to rock the boat without negatively impacting others.

When You Make a Mistake, Own it. What did you learn? Use “What Worked? / What Didn’t Work?”  individually and with the team to develop clarity. Then, share with your boss and customer.

Apologize. This reduces defensiveness when a mistake has been made. Remember, you must address the “elephant in the roombefore you can have a straight conversation and make a positive difference. For example, “I’m sorry this project went over budget. Here are the facts about why it happened and what I/we learned.”

Be Proactive, Not Reactive. Mistakes and failures are often avoidable when you are “present” in conversations. Learn to listen with an open mind. Then, ask questions for clarification about the impact new ideas could have on systems, people, and the bottom line. Be a guide for your team to be resourceful, resilient, and flexible when addressing change.

Hire the Right Team. You cannot achieve success alone. Let me repeat that you cannot achieve success alone. And hiring the wrong person for your team is the fastest way to fail! So instead, hire the right team the first time by using a qualified job fit assessment as 1/3 of your selection process. Included will be a coaching guide to develop your team and you and show you how to improve results now and in the future.

Uncover Your Blind Spots. Every leader and team has them. Your ability to recognize and work through them makes the difference between success, so-so results, or failure. Use a qualified job fit assessment and executive coach to move forward faster and with clarity.

©Jeannette Seibly 2022 All Rights Reserved

Jeannette Seibly is The Leadership Results Coach. She’s celebrating 30 years as an award-winning international executive consultant, speaker, and coach. Her clients value the listening and positive difference she brings to any conversation. Feel stuck in a sticky situation or in challenging relationships? Want straightforward counsel to blast through it? Contact Jeannette for a confidential discussion. PS: She’s also a two-time Amazon International Best-Selling Author!

A note from Jeannette about using failure to grow your career success and opportunities: Many leaders and bosses fear failure. They want to look good and be well-liked. The problem is that they become locked in a myopic point-of-view of what can be accomplished and how it should be done. This fear hurts career growth and opportunities for new projects. Not sure where to begin? Contact me for a confidential conversation.

Leaders need to stretch themselves beyond their perceived limitations for professional growth. It starts with distinguishing your blind spots: https://bit.ly/BeEffectiveLeader